


The Weight of Not Sitting on the Throne

by ForNought



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Historical, Alternate Universe - Royalty, Arranged Marriage, Attempted assassination, M/M, Minor Character Death, Multi, Regicide, Slow Burn, Suicide mention, anachronism a few hundred years either side of the Asuka period, diplomatic breakdowns, half of the wordcount comes from everybody's bloated titles, lots of insincerity, occasional epithets, occasional strong language, other background pairings, real or perceived superiority complexes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-02
Updated: 2017-03-04
Packaged: 2018-09-21 14:41:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 87,893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9553157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ForNought/pseuds/ForNought
Summary: Katsumichi is sent to The Fearsome Kingdom of Shiratorizawa to marry one of the princes there to aid the diplomatic relationship between that kingdom and his own. Upon arriving there he finds himself regretting the fact that he agreed to help out. Soon he finds his new home to be just as ferocious within as it had been in the wars against the Dead Kingdoms so many years before.





	1. The Ferocious Kingdom of Shiratorizawa

“What is this?”

Katsumichi flinched at the hard voice. He had heard a lot of things about Shiratorizawa; all of them frightening and some of them coming true as soon as he had arrived in the courtyard. He settled for hoping that all would be fine if he assumed the lowest place on the hierarchy. He was in this new kingdom as a gesture of goodwill between Shiratorizawa and Johzenji. He wished he could go back home to Johzenji. Nobody there looked at him like the woman who was currently scrutinising him.

The woman’s hair was stuffed with glittering ornaments that must have made her head ache. The stiff layers of her _juunihitoe_ looked even heavier than the pins in her hair, embroidered fabrics better suited to the dead of winter rather than midsummer. Fingers that looked more like decorative claws gripped at his face and titled his head from side to side.

Especially now that the woman’s hands were so close to his face, Katsumichi did not like the thought of breathing too heavily and getting his eyes clawed out, or similar. Not that he thought that would happen to him. Good will or not, should he come to such extreme harm, sanctions were sure to be brought against Shiratorizawa. Though if his death was caused by something as undetectable as inhaling heavy perfumes that made his stomach turn, well there was nothing that could be done about that.

He wished he had been able to eat. He had been too nervous when he awoke in the morning and now that he was here in this new kingdom, his empty stomach churned more violently than it ever had in his life.

He held his breath.

“Surely this is a joke,” The woman said, not quite spitting out her words which still rolled bitterly in her mouth.

“There is no joke,” Katsumichi said. He bowed deeply until he heard the woman tut loudly. “I have been impudent, _Hidenka_. I am Prince Katsumichi, the Fifth Child and Fourth Prince of the Virtuous Kingdom of Johzenji. I have arrived in accordance to the contract between our two kingdoms. I am betrothed to... to Prince… to the Eighth Child of the Fearsome Kingdom of Shiratorizawa, Prince Taichi.”

There was barely a flash in the woman’s eyes before her hand cracked across Katsumichi’s face. He held his hands at his sides, fingers curling into fists and his nails pressing into the flesh of his palms as he fought the urge to hold at the blooming red of his cheek.

“Don’t you think this is going too far? Johzenji couldn’t deign to marry a princess to us but they also sent us an incompetent idiot who doesn’t even know to whom he is betrothed?” She huffed and shook her head, the impressive construction on her head built from hair and jewelled pins didn’t even tremble. “My son, Prince Taichi is the Twelfth Child and S _eventh_ Prince of Shiratorizawa.”

“My apologies!”

Katsumichi was barely in _dogeza_ by the time he heard some servants tittering behind him.

“Mother, what is going on here?” The voice was deep and careful and Katsumichi was not inclined to rise so soon. He kept his forehead down and his fingers firm on the ground.

“Your _bride_ has arrived.”

“Hmm?”

There were swift footsteps and the rustling of layers of skirts moving in the direction of the newcomer. “He is what Johzenji sent. You realise that if you marry him you will move down in succession. And where will that leave us?”

“Hmm? Oh I already knew. I agreed to their fifth,” the voice didn’t seem at all concerned with the situation. It was tempting to raise his head to look at the man he was to marry but he was still terrified.

“You’ve met him before?”

“No. I just picked the child who seemed the most similar to myself. I’m the twelfth and he is the fifth. I doubt either of us would be king so I thought it was for the best. Oh, and nobody mentioned that he had any problems with marrying a man.”

“You mean to tell me that you knew all along that you would marry a man?” Katsumichi would have been tempted to offer more than a noncommittal hum to a voice as deadly as that, but this wasn’t his battle. The footsteps were approaching and he breathed through the temptation to get up and run away. Hands were on his back, soft and warm. “You idiot. Why didn’t you tell me? You let me hurt this poor child for no reason. Are you alright?”

Katsumichi sat up when guided by the hands that had moved to his arms. The woman’s brow furrowed and she was scrutinising him yet again. “I’m fine.”

“I do apologise. Please forgive my indiscretion. I will endeavour to never raise a hand to you in future,” She said softly, inclining her head stiffly.

“No, I really am fine! I’m sorry. I should have been more prepared to meet you, _Hidenka_.”

She smiled softly and cradled Katsumichi’s face in her hands, the silver dripping from her fingers warmed by her skin but still cooler than the soft plumpness of her palms. “No, this won’t do. I do apologise. To think how I must have made you look in front of the servants. I will do everything I can to ensure your marriage is a success.”

“It really is no trouble, _Hidenka_.”

“Lady Yue. My name is Lady Yue. I am honoured to have you join our house.”

Katsumichi could only smile, mostly shocked at the contrasting treatment.  He finally glanced over his shoulder at Prince Taichi. He was tall, of course. He was the splitting image of his mother who was a handsome woman herself. There was a warmth in Katsumichi’s face that had nothing at all to do with the tingle sting that still remained. He swiftly turned and inclined his head.

“I am very pleased to meet you, Prince Taichi, the Twelfth Child and Seventh Prince of the Fearsome Kingdom of Shiratorizawa. I am Prince Katsumichi, the Fifth Child and Fourth Prince of the Virtuous Kingdom of Johzenji. I, and the Kingdom of Johzenji thank you for choosing to marry me. I hope that this can further strengthen the bond between our two kingdoms.”

Prince Taichi smiled. He inclined his head shortly and said, “You should stand. You too, Mother. I am looking forward to a long life with you, Prince Katsumichi.”

He turned on his heel and left quickly, disappearing around a corner at the other side of the courtyard. Katsumichi and Lady Yue stood. Lady Yue beckoned over two of her servants. “They will show you to your quarters for the day. They will help you get ready for tonight. Please look after my son.”

Lady Yue bowed and left the courtyard with her servants in tow. The two that remained at Katsumichi’s side gestured in the direction they would take. They were kind in the most generic way, asking whether he was excited to be brought into the Royal House of Shiratorizawa, pointing out features of the palace and asking whether the palace at Johzenji differed to any great degree.

The layout was different. The main hall of Johzenji was accessible from the courtyard by the entrance. Here at Shiratorizawa it was cloistered away behind some smaller buildings that were vaguely pointed out as they walked past. It was a pleasant, but brisk walk through a wide garden before they reached the room where Katsumichi would stay for the day. A small row of rooms were adjacent to a large outdoor bath. Katsumichi’s was the second along the row. Inside, the ceiling was low and there wasn’t much beside a low bed, fresh clothes, and a large, round clay tub.  

Though Lady Yue had informed him that these two servants would be getting him ready, he had not realised the extent to which that was meant. At least not until they were unfastening his clothes and unravelling layers while he stood nonplussed. When he finally gathered his thoughts he held his arms tight against his body, hoping to prevent any more undressing.

“Is everything alright, Prince Katsumichi?”

“Yes, of course.” He did not move his hands.

“Are you shy?” The other servant asked, face too neutral to not be hiding a grin. 

“What makes you think that?”

“It’s nothing that we haven’t seen before,” The probably-not grinning servant said. Katsumichi couldn’t help that his arms tightened around his body at the words. “Of course, we are not claiming to have seen your unsullied, royal body.”

“They all tend to be the same,” The other servant agreed wryly. “Unless you want to hear that no two unsullied, royal bodies are alike.”

“Can you stop saying unsullied… well, what you keep saying.”

“He really is shy!”

“How old are you?”

“Twenty three years old,” Katsumichi said quietly. The two servants exchanged a glance.

“How about we promise to close our eyes as we inspect and prepare your body?”

“Deal.”

Katsumichi wasn’t sure whether the two servants upheld their side of the bargain. It was unlikely that they did considering the swift ease with which they worked. He had kept his own eyes closed the whole time, ears easily filtering out the slosh of water and scrubbing of cloth at his skin so that he could hear the scratch of ink on paper. He had no idea what sort of notes they would be making about him but he supposed it must have been a thing done in all of the kingdoms. When he was settled he would have to send a letter to his eldest sister to ask if she went through the same thing when she was received for marriage.

He followed instructions for what seemed like hours as he stood and turned and tilted his head for the servants to view and wash over his body. The passage of time was even harder to tell when he realised he had fallen asleep as his hair was washed. He opened his eyes after his nap, looking around unnoticed for long enough to see the servants pretend to cover their eyes with split fingers as they realised he had woken.

He was dried methodically from head to toe, a sweet-smelling oil massaged into his skin. The scent was unlike any flower of fruit that Katsumichi had smelled back in Johzenji but he didn’t want to ask what it was in case he was supposed to already know what it was.  

Dressing was over surprisingly quickly. A soft gold _yukata_ was draped about him and loosely with an obi. He was directed to don _geta._

“If you would like to follow us, Prince Katsumichi, we will escort you to where you are to be wed.”

He had hardly noticed the servants had dropped honourifics until they started using them again. He wouldn’t mention it to anybody else in case they got in trouble, but hearing them address him so formally made his nerves skyrocket.

Shiratorizawa was only half a day’s journey from Johzenji but he knew he would not be allowed to travel freely between the two kingdoms. He was here now, an invested interest in something political. It would be nice if despite the real reasons for being here he could live a nice life.

So far he had only met Lady Yue and Prince Taichi himself. They seemed amiable enough but this was already a different place to home.

It was dark and Katsumichi would not have been able to navigate his way back to the room if he was left to his own devices. The clacking of his _geta_ on the stone path echoed with the foreboding that he hadn’t even realised he was feeling. It had been at the back of his mind for months and thrummed stronger day by day until he was able to place what he had been feeling.

Slowly, Katsumichi knelt outside the door he had been led to. The servants kneeling either side of him slid the door open before he had the chance to stabilise his breathing. The room was large. An elderly man was kneeling at the centre of the room with a large sheet of paper. It could only be the document to confirm the marriage. A week after the marriage had been confirmed for Johzenji, Katsumichi’s dowry would be sent to Shiratorizawa. Officially it was to help him to make a home with his new family. Shiratorizawa didn’t want for land so it was more likely to fund the training of more soldiers.

He was sitting opposite the elderly man for a while before Prince Taichi arrived with a man who looked ambiguously official.

It was not so much a ceremony as a formality to sign the documents. There was a lot of talking about something very complicated in mumbling voices. Katsumichi couldn’t begin to follow but periodic glances at Prince Taichi gave the impression that he knew what was going on. He should have been trying harder to pay attention because all he could do was blush awkwardly when he was supposed to have said something – all eyes were on him and he could only apologise.

He took the brush that the officials had been holding out to him and tried to steady his hand as he drew strokes on the page when prompted a second time.

Eventually it was over and the two elderly men left.

And then Katsumichi was alone with Prince Taichi, the Twelfth Child and Seventh Prince of Shiratorizawa.

“We’re married now,” Taichi said quietly. Katsumichi nodded. He was… He was married to Prince Taichi, the Twelfth Child and Seventh Prince of Shiratorizawa. He was living here now, and he would be for the rest of his life.

“I hope we have a long life together.”

“I agree. Would you like the start or should I?” Taichi asked quietly.

Katsumichi hadn’t thought this far ahead. His legs were falling asleep underneath him and he would have quite liked to stretch them out but Prince Taichi was peering at him expectantly and it was not until then that Katsumichi realised. A marriage was more than just signing documents and even if there were no children to be had there were certain things that were the usual way things were done.

Katsumichi licked his lips and wondered what it was he was supposed to say here. He couldn’t work out why he was so surprised by it all. Prince Taichi looked a bit apprehensive about the whole thing. It might have just been wishful thinking on Katsumichi’s part but he had forgotten all about this part of confirming the marriage. Whether or not Prince Taichi had also forgotten about it was debatable.

But Prince Taichi didn’t look entirely as though he was chomping at the bit to get started. Katsumichi decided to see if they were both thinking about the same thing.

“What is it we are starting?”

“We should consummate the marriage.”

Of course. That was exactly what Katsumichi had thought, except just saying the word ‘consummate’ had sparked a fierce blush in Prince Taichi’s face. Katsumichi wondered if the reaction would be similar if he had said ‘sex’ or anything more closely related to the act than the relatively distant term ‘consummate’.

Katsumichi felt like an idiot for having not thought about that sort of thing in a long while, though he wondered if other people hadn’t thought about that sort of thing at all until their marriage was imminent. That surely couldn’t be the case. People always _said_ that they only did those sorts of things when they were married, because it was fine as long as there was no true evidence of the fact and nobody got caught. Realistically, Katsumichi had to be polite and ignore the astonishingly short pregnancies of relatives and pretend he couldn’t see the obvious signs of weight gain when marriages were had. People just turned a blind eye to it because it wasn’t as though they hadn’t done anything similar.

But Prince Taichi was fiddling with his _yukata_ and biting his lip as though he was worried about what lay ahead of him.

Katsumichi knew exactly what he thought but it seemed a dangerous thing to ask outright. He attempted a more subtle approach. “And what exactly does that entail?”

“What does it entail? Consummating the marriage?” Taichi said evenly. He shuffled closer and placed a hand on Katsumichi’s knee with a feather-light pressure. “You really don’t know what it means?”

Katsumichi had clearly been too subtle because from that he had no idea whether Prince Taichi knew what it meant. The nerves seemed to have given way for shy surety, but honestly, Katsumichi still suspected it was all bolstering. He was certain that Prince Taichi was anxious about having sex, but he didn’t really know him well enough to be as confident in his thinking as to mention it aloud.

It was probably better to err on the side of caution, so Katsumichi shrugged his shoulders a little bit and tilted his chin down coyly. “I’m sorry, I don’t know.”

“It’s okay.” Taichi withdrew his hand. “I had assumed we were of similar ages. How old are you?”

“I am twenty three years old.”

Prince Taichi had the audacity to look concerned. Katsumichi was trying to help him feel a bit less pressured by their imminent duty and Prince Taichi was staring back with concern deep in his eyes. He was obviously worrying about the wrong thing because Katsumichi knew all too well what sex was and how to do it well. It had been a while since the last time he had to do it but he was sure even his half-decade-old experience far outstripped whatever fumbles Prince Taichi was pretending he had amassed. Though Prince Taichi hadn’t mentioned anything of the sort so at this point Katsumichi could only speculate.

Prince Taichi nodded, looking vaguely away from Katsumichi.

 “You’re the same age as me,” He said, confused and pink. “And you don’t know what it means to consummate a marriage. Do you know anything at all about sex?”

Of course Katsumichi knew, and part of him wanted to smugly rub the fact in Prince Taichi’s face. He had belatedly learnt what some of his brothers’ jokes meant but he had still understood them long before he arrived here in Shiratorizawa. But he hadn’t set himself up particularly well to admit that.

The more concerned and unimpressed Prince Taichi looked, the less grounds Katsumichi had to accuse him of not knowing about sex himself. But he had a feeling that he was right and that Prince Taichi really didn’t know. He wasn’t one to make fun of people for having had different experiences than his own – not everyone got to be a prince and not everybody got to live simply as a commoner and taste the rich simplicity of not being important enough for anybody to care about who they wanted to have sex with. Katsumichi could hardly brag about having had both of those experiences and more because he didn’t really want to talk about it if it became more than a passing mention. It was something of a sore point and he still hadn’t quite gotten over being dumped so unceremoniously. But being informally proposed to and subsequently never being contacted again aside, Katsumichi didn’t get the impression that Shiratorizawa was a kingdom rich in opportunity for people who wanted to see something a little bit different to the norm.

If one couldn’t forgo the dullness of their provincial life for something that made their heart race – and the same could be said of palatial life, no matter how excessively decadent – then they had no business acting like they had so much more to offer. Especially not when it was starkly clear to Katsumichi that he was the only one here with any practical experience to speak of.

Initially he hadn’t wanted to make Prince Taichi feel pressured about how he was doing, and he didn’t want him to worry that maybe he was an ugly, unlovable freak either – it also wouldn’t do if premarital sex was frowned upon in Shiratorizawa considering Katsumichi didn’t think he could live through the shame of returning to Johzenji entirely unwed after only one day. Now he was getting annoyed at being regarded in such a way. Katsumichi had some self-respect and that meant he wasn’t going to have sex with someone who couldn’t even muster an encouraging smile to somebody they believed to be more of a novice than themselves.

Katsumichi suddenly recalled the servants’ comments about ‘unsullied royal bodies’ and what would sully a body. Whatever it was, Prince Taichi no doubt had one of those unsullied royal bodies. He was going to have to work harder if he wanted to get rid of it.

Katsumichi shook his head to see what Prince Taichi would say to someone who claimed to know nothing of sex at the age of twenty-three.

 “That’s fine,” Prince Taichi said. “You’ve had a long day. We should sleep and we can discuss it another time.”

He stood quickly and when he looked back down at Katsumichi the line of his mouth was tight. And then he made to exit the room and call for assistance.

He seemed to be surprised by the presence of servants outside the door. After a long sigh he murmured to them quickly and they came in to set the room up for them to sleep. Futons were rolled onto the floor, a _shaku_ of space between them, and even that looked to be too lonely.

Though Katsumichi tried not to think about things like being lonely at a time like this. He was very annoyed and technically still not married and it was all Prince Taichi’s fault. Though he had heard things about Shiratorizawa – the things he had heard kept his mouth sealed against the complaints he could already feel building at the back of his tongue.

It was fine. He didn’t need to have sex with Prince Taichi. He didn’t even need to sleep right next to him. He was just fine in this weird kingdom with all of its weird people who slap poor innocent princes for no reason and glare at him because he is a clueless virgin – even though he wasn’t!

Katsumichi crawled under the covers of one of the futons and pulled them up to right under his nose. All of the oil lamps around the room were snuffed out quickly before the servants left without a whisper of a good night. Things were certainly different in Shiratorizawa.

Katsumichi caught the tail-end of a smile from Taichi who switched off the remaining oil lamp before slipping into the other futon.


	2. The Fearsome King

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Katsumichi meets the King of Shiratorizawa though he doesn't make a very good impression

It was bright when Katsumichi woke up. He didn’t know how he suddenly woke up because he was squinting his eyes as he sat up in his futon. Prince Taichi’s futon was still on the floor, the covers rumpled on top of it. Katsumichi rubbed at his eyes, mostly just to make sure there wasn’t any awkward mucus clogging up the corners of his eyes. The screens at one of the walls had been opened wide. Prince Taichi was sitting at the edge of the room, looking out at the pond right outside.

“Good morning, _Denka_ ,” Katsumichi said, scrambling into a kneeling bow upon realising he had spoken while still half-lounging in bed. He wasn’t quite as annoyed as he was before he fell asleep and he certainly wasn’t rude.

Prince Taichi leaned back to look over at him. “Your father is a king too, isn’t he?”

“Ah, yes.”

“Good morning to you to,” Prince Taichi said. He stood slowly. “I shall go to inform the servants that we are ready for breakfast.”

He left quickly, crossing the room to exit through the screen door on the other side. Katsumichi peered under the _sudare_ shading the room from the sun-drenched garden outside. It was a warm day and the cicadas were already chirping. Katsumichi would have preferred to sleep for longer but he was going to have to eat breakfast. It was going to be a lot to get used to, being married.

The first night had not been at all how Katsumichi had imagined it. He was surprised he had been able to sleep so soundly even though he had been close to seething at the cheek of Prince Taichi to act as though he knew everything. There was no point in Katsumichi getting irritated all over again. He was mostly married now. Katsumichi would have to start getting used to being around Prince Taichi, but he still wasn’t sure how he had been comfortable enough next to this stranger to sleep the night through. He must have drifted to a heavy slumber as a result of the fragrant oil that had been rubbed into his skin following his bath. He was thankful for that.

He was less thankful for the fact that he needed to relieve himself. He hadn’t ingested much of anything the day before, and he had drunk just a few cups of water on the way to Shiratorizawa, but his bladder was uncomfortably full. He waited for a servant to come so that he would ask where he was supposed to go, but Prince Taichi returned quickly. He sat beside Katsumichi.

“Today, my father will gift us our home. I’m not sure how much land there will be because I don’t often venture beyond the market outside the palace. It should be sufficient. I imagine we will take a servant each with us.”

Katsumichi nodded. He didn’t really care all that much for the living arrangements. The fact that he was soon to wet himself was a more pressing matter. “Will we be going there today?”

Taichi shook his head. “Today we will meet with the king and he will bless our marriage and I will officially be moved down the line of succession to the throne. We will toast to his health and he will toast to the longevity of our marriage. I believe Prince Reon, the Fourth Child and Third Prince of Shiratorizawa and his wife, the Fifth Child of Date will receive us for lunch.”

“I see.”

“My brother and his wife are looking forward to meeting you.”

“Ah, me too.”

Taichi looked at Katsumichi oddly. It was a diluted version of the looks Lady Yue had initially sent his way but despite the lower intensity it made his skin feel hot. Katsumichi looked away quickly and pressed his hands into his lap.

“Are you alright, Katsumichi?”

“Yes, I’m fine.”

“You don’t…” Prince Taichi sat up a bit straighter and lowered his voice. His eyes flickered to the open door across the room a few times. “I know the documents have already been signed but if you feel this was too rash a decision we could get them nullified before any official announcements are made.”

It was far too late to pretend they had never been married. In johzenji nnouncements had already been made that Katsumichi was to journey to Shiratorizawa to marry one of the princes and bring their kingdoms closer together. Returning home now, especially after they were meant to have spent their first night sleeping side by side as a married couple, would be humiliating. Katsumichi doubted he would get an opportunity to marry again, not if some scandal made its way to other kingdoms or influential houses. More immediately humiliating was Prince Taichi even suggesting they nullified the contracts already. Had he already thought of this as a mistake? Was he regretting getting married to somebody as apparently clueless as Katsumichi after not even a whole day together? It was worse than if the things Prince Taichi thought were true.  

“Why would we nullify the contract now?”

“This isn’t the main reason but you don’t even know…” Prince Taichi closed his mouth and fixed his face with a small smile. He greeted the servants who brought breakfast into the room.  

“Is there anything else we can do for you both?”

“Nothing else will be necessary,” Prince Taichi said firmly. But if Katsumichi let this chance slip away he wasn’t sure when he would get the opportunity to ask again. It might be far too late the next time he got to ask.

“Actually,” He said as he jumped up, “I have something that I need to ask you in private.”

Prince Taichi was nonplussed and the servants looked uncertain. “You have something to ask us? In private?”

“Yes, um,” Katsumichi bowed quickly to Prince Taichi and darted to the doorway. He clumsily slipped his feet into the _geta_ that had been provided for him the night before and he dashed away from the room. He waited for the servants to move in their slow and methodical way until they reached the edge of the building. His face and neck were hot as he waited for them to catch up, the anticipation of asking the question getting the better of his composure. “I need to urinate.”

“I see,” One of the servants said looking for all the world as though she did not, in fact, see.

“Where can I go to… to do it?”

“To urinate?” The other servant clarified as though there was any need for such a thing.

Katsumichi nodded and was swiftly led to a small building which was longer than it was wide, similar to the row of rooms he had been led to the night before, though on a smaller scale. He was able to use the toilet quickly and when he left he was directed to a small alcove where one of the servants doused his hands in water. He felt much better after having used the toilet and he felt lighter on his way back to the room. However the closer he got to his return to Prince Taichi, the heavier his shoulders felt. Prince Taichi appeared disinterested as Katsumichi reappeared and he slipped off the _geta_ and returned to sit back down, the small bowls of food between them.

“Thank you very much, Eri, Kaori.”

The women both bowed deeply to Prince Taichi and then Katsumichi before backing out of the room slowly. They were well practiced in their movements, not even stumbling over the slight step down as they exited. Prince Taichi held a finger to his lips for long enough for the discomfort Katsumichi felt to intensify. Eventually he exhaled heavily.

“I don’t mean anything bad when I say this, but you’re quite naïve.”

Katsumichi was not at all naïve but he this did not seem to be the appropriate time to reveal that. Prince Taichi had certainly made it sound like a bad thing. Katsumichi already knew that naïvety was not a bad thing and he would never dream of lording feigned superiority over somebody else because they hadn’t had as much sex as he had.

But seeing as Katsumichi was pretending to not know anything he supposed he must show that he was suited to any role.

 “Whatever it is you need me to know I will learn it. I won’t tell you that I am one of the smarter ones among my brothers, but I have determination. I will do whatever you want me to do and I will think whatever it is you want me to think.” Katasumichi knew he sounded pathetic but he was sure Prince Taichi wanted him to be that way. More important than a mild personality flaw was the fact that the marriage came about for a reason. Katsumichi was here to benefit his kingdom. “You do not regret the match, do you?”

Prince Taichi sighed. He seemed more content to play with the food than anything. “I am not sure. I understand your willingness to marry for the sake of your kingdom, but… If you do not feel as though you are prepared for married life, we can get it dealt with.”

Katsumichi narrowed his eyes but only realised how his expression must look once surprised passed over Prince Taichi’s features. He schooled his face into a more agreeable expression. Perhaps Prince Taichi was regretting the marriage.

“This is only the first day,” Katsumichi said quietly. “Please, reconsider what you are saying, _Denka_. I fear I cannot ask this of you as your spouse but I implore you to listen to the plea of Prince Katsumichi, the Fifth Child and Fourth Prince of the Virtuous Kingdom of Johzenji.”

It probably was not twelve hours since the last time he was bowing this deeply to a member of the Shiratorizawa Royal Family but he knew the situation he was in. Johzenji was by no means a small kingdom, and it was well positioned with villages at the coast to add to the resources for trade, but the King’s health had been in decline for a while. It was not something the other kingdoms needed to know but it was something that Katsumichi needed to help protect against. He didn’t need an uppity virgin ruining things just because he could. He had to hope that his words and _dogeza_ were enough to make Prince Taichi realise his rashness.  

“Oh.”

“I apologise for being insufficiently prepared.”

“No,” Taichi said quietly. His hands danced hesitantly in Katsumichi’s vision and without any contact he said, “Please stop bowing to me. I’m sorry. I thought you were regretting the marriage.”

“Why would you think that?” Katsumichi asked, sounding as scandalised as he possibly could. It seemed it was not only sex but also basic human interaction where Prince Taichi was lacking experience. He had never once hinted at not wanting to go ahead with the marriage and he wondered whether he was letting slip the reservations he had been harbouring himself. And because he thought it prudent to match his spouse in terms of bumbling clumsiness, he added, “If you don’t mind me asking.”

“Not at all. It’s just that this morning you seemed to be very uncomfortable. I thought perhaps you were beginning to think you were married too soon. Pardon me if you think me rude but I think this is as good a time as any.”

A good time for what, Katsumichi had no clue and he watched as Prince Taichi spooned rice into a bowl and passed it over. He waited until Katsumichi had thanked him and begun to nibble on a few grains of rice before he went on, which seemed tactical after the fact.

“What do you know about marriage?”

“It is a way to strengthen the relationship between our two kingdoms. We will live together until the end of our lives. Some royals will have several marriages and take on several spouses and concubines in order to secure an heir.” Katstumichi chewed on some more rice thoughtfully and finally added, “Of course if you have many children you can marry them off to other kingdoms and powerful families to ensure there is a deterrent from any wars and things like that. A bit like Karasuno.”

Prince Taichi smiled grimly. “Beyond that,” He pressed. “What does marriage mean for us?”

“I’m not sure,” Katsumichi said honestly. Aside from the obvious formation of a tentative political bond, which seemed like an obtuse answer here, he really couldn’t think of anything else. “We can’t really have children, can we?”

“Not as far as I know.” He sounded tired and Katsumichi wondered whether he was the only one who slept well the night before. Maybe Prince Taichi had struggled all through the night to get any rest and that was why he was up before Katsumichi. Perhaps his nerves from the evening had never quite receded. He wasn’t sure what to think of that but Prince Taichi spoke again. “The process of making children… there is something similar we could do with a different result. It is something that married couples do. Please answer me honestly, but do you understand what I am talking about?”

It was a clumsy analogy and Katsumichi mostly wanted to see where Prince Taichi was going with it. He shook his head. “Not really.”

“I thought as much. I am not going to make you do anything, but we are the same age. I’m just curious as to how you don’t know anything about this.”

Katsumichi was frankly surprised himself. Prince Taichi seemed to know about sex, and perhaps he had even thought about what it would be like to do it, but Katsumichi was still sure that the experience that went along with his knowledge was minimal to none. Prince Taichi wasn’t an ugly man, by any means, and as he had stated that he had no intention of approaching the throne he must have had more spare time than those who were training to prove their worth as potential kings. He must have had the opportunity at some point to touch and kiss and wonder about falling in love. Even if it was a different sort of sex. It was highly suspicious to Katsumichi that he was sensing so strongly that Prince Taichi didn’t at all know the touch of another person.

It didn’t make sense to him but he still couldn’t ask outright what the situation was. So he said, “I don’t know how I don’t know.”

“Right. It’s just, I have met some of your brothers before. They definitely know.” Prince Taichi shook his head. “It matters not. We can live well together. It isn’t necessary for a marriage to work. I hope that you can ask me about anything else you are unsure about.” 

Katsumichi didn’t ask when Prince Taichi had met any of his brothers and he didn’t ask what possible advice he had to give on how to make a marriage work.

The pair of them continued eating in silence. Katsumichi ate slowly, chewing eat mouthful over and over. Katsumichi’s stomach was not accepting the food as easily as he would have liked and he wondered whether he was actually so bothered by Prince Taichi that he had lost his appetite entirely.

Prince Taichi finished his food quickly and sat and waited for Katsumichi to finish. He was taking too long so he gave up. It was a struggle to eat the little that he had and Prince Taichi seemed relieved when Katsumichi set down the bowl and his chopsticks – the side dishes left untouched. The servants were called to take away the food. It seemed like a waste, but he couldn’t finish it.

The servants returned swiftly. Katsumichi was not sure which one was Eri and which one was Kaori and he would have to ask them later. One of them beckoned Katsumichi to follow while the other remained with Prince Taichi.

“How are you this morning?” The servant asked once they were, what Katsumichi assumed to be, a safe distance away from the room Katsumichi had spent the night in.

“Before that, can I ask what your name is?” Katsumichi asked because there was no time like the present. They walked a few more steps and the servant’s shoulder line raised at the words. But she paused and turned to bow to him.

“Servant to the Royal Family of Shiratorizawa, Kaori,” She said, her voice clipped with the annunciation of each syllable. She raised from her bow and smiled. “How are you this morning?”

“I’m fine.”

Kaori turned sharply and continued to walk and Katsumichi followed. “Shiratorizawa is a nice place to work. I hope you find it a nice place to live.”

“Thank you.”

Kaori did not try to push conversation further and they arrived at the room that Katsumichi had been taken to yesterday. The second door along the row opened swiftly and Katsumichi went inside. Kaori remained at the doorway and used her foot to neatly arrange Katsumichi’s _geta_.

“Prince Katsumichi of Johzenji, the Spouse of Prince Taichi, the Twelfth Child and Seventh Prince of Shiratorizawa,” Kaori said with her head inclined. “Today, after washing, you shall be allowed to bathe outdoors and enjoy the spring of Shiratorizawa. Later you are to meet with Prince Reon, the Fourth Child and Third Prince of Shiratorizawa, and his Spouse, Lady Mai of Date. Please ensure your mental state is sufficient to greet them.”

Katsumichi was alone and unsure of what he was supposed to do. Yesterday the servants had been insistent on getting up-close and personal with him. Today he had no indication whether he was to await their assistance or to independently bathe and monitor his own mental state.

He undressed, thinking it best to not sit idly and waste time. He found nowhere to hang his _yukata_ and laid it neatly as he could on the tiled floor near the clay tub. There was an assortment of clothes and oils on a tray beside the large tub and the tub itself had already been filled with warm water.  The tiles were shiny and deep red and each time he saturated a cloth and wrung it out, water splattered on the tiles and rolled over the hard iridescence. He poured a small amount of oil on the cloth and scrubbed at his skin.

A deep dish was behind the tray of oil bottles. He had sniffed at a few of the bottles and though they all smelled pleasant, none of them were quite the same as the oil that had been applied to his skin the night before. The oil he had used smelled familiar, nice, but it was too sweet and as he was already feeling unwell he wanted to rinse it from his skin quickly. He stood to gently fill the dish and tip the water over himself. He used a different cloth to wipe over his skin and remove the emulsion of sweet oil and water.

Too late, he realised he had made a mistake. The water on the tiles was draining towards the _yukata_ he had been wearing before. Not only had he nothing else to wear, but he had drenched the _yukata_ and probably ruined it. He tried to squeeze the water out of the silk but it was sodden and dull. He moved it further from the tub and had to resort to half-draping it over the edge of the tub.

He had done what he could and he supposed he would just have to apologise later. For now he would do as he was told, and try to relax in the outdoor bath. The wall at the back of the room has a seam that was difficult to see but he eventually got the door open.

From yesterday, Katsumichi remembered that part of the bath could be seen by passers-by so as he walked to the smooth rocks at the ledge of the bath he tried to determine which part of the bath could be seen. Around the perimeter there were many flowering bushes that enclosed the bath and there was nowhere from inside that he could imagine he would be seen. He decided it best to stay still and stop sloshing the water all over the place. He sat down at the far edge of the bath and tried to relax as the warm water rippled around him.

“Oh. Who are you?”

Katsumichi jumped out of his skin. He wrenched open his eyes and scanned the area until from a far corner of the bath, next to a large rock which he had deduced to be nothing more than an inlet from a larger body of water, stood a man.

The man was tall, and maybe it was because Katsumichi was sitting down, but the man looked to be too tall. His shoulders were broad and the muscles of his chest and abdomen… sure were something.

Katsumichi blinked a few times. He stood quickly. Obviously this man was a member of the Shiratorizawa Royal Family. There would be no other reason for him to be here and Katsumichi quickly lowered himself into a bow.

“I am Prince Katsumichi, the Fifth Child and Fourth Prince of Johzenji, the Spouse of Prince Taichi, the Twelfth Child and Seventh Prince of Shiratorizawa. Forgive my intrusion to this bathing area, Your… Your Highness.”

Katsumichi could keenly hear the sloshing of water, a more defined sound than the ambient trickle of water filtering into the bath.

“I see. I am Prince Wakatoshi, the Second Child and Second Prince of Shiratorizawa. I hope that my brother is taking good care of you.”

Katsumichi nodded quickly. “Of course he is. I have only known him for a few hours but I am eagerly anticipating my life together with Prince Taichi.”  

“Good luck, but, shouldn’t you be meeting with my father soon?”

“I’m sorry?”

“The morning after the marriage, the King must bless the union and gift you a house to live with Taichi.”

“What?” Katsumichi tried to think back and Prince Taichi had mentioned something like that to him. He tripped over his own feet, scraping his toes on the bottom of the bath as he moved. “Please excuse me, Prince Wakatoshi, the Second Child and–”

“You’d better hurry,” Prince Wakatoshi said, dismissing him quickly. Katsumichi bowed again and tried his best not to slip as he waded to the other side of the bath and crawled out and into room number two.

A woman screamed and Katsumichi screamed in response, trying his best to hide behind the tub.

“Kaori-san!”

“ _Denka,_ you startled me,” Kaori said sounding breathless. Katsumichi could understand seeing as his own heart was hammering against his ribs. She shook her head and strode across the small room with her arm held out to Katsumichi. “Where did you go?”

“You told me to bathe and prepare my mental state.”

“I meant for you to wait here!” She said, raising her voice slightly and her face growing red. She huffed and bowed stiffly. “Forgive me for speaking to you in such a manner.”

“It’s fine,” Katsumichi said, yelping as he was dragged from behind the tub. Out of the warmth of the water he was starting to shiver. The adrenaline from the surprise Kaori gave him was wearing off and goosebumps were erupting over his skin. “You won’t get in trouble will you?”

Kaori was brisk as she swaddled him in towels and rubbed at his skin. She shook her head. “Not if we hurry. I will have to get this mess cleared up before anybody else sees what you’ve done in here. What were you thinking, Your Highness? Spilling water and the oils all over the floor, and the _yukata_ that you were wearing. We might have to lie and say that last night you and Prince Taichi got over-excited and tore it.”

“Why would we have done that?”

Kaori sighed. Her hands were quick and careless as she smoothed something cool over Katsumichi’s skin. “That’s right, I’d forgotten.”

“Forgotten what?”

“Forgive me for misspeaking,” She said, entirely too cryptically. “Let’s just get you dressed, shall we?”

After finally dressing, Kaori looked over Katsumichi with appraising eyes and nodded. The deep indigo of the _kimono_ was as dark as Katsumichi’s first night in Shiratorizawa. He didn’t have a mirror but he supposed he must have looked nice. Hopefully he would look presentable enough for the king.

Kaori’s pace was quick as she led Katsumichi away from the room. It was bright as the sun crawled closer to noon. Katsumichi remembered he was supposed to lunch with Taichi’s brother and his wife, so if he was to meet with the king before that he was very likely late.

Katsumichi could not help but notice that as he and Kaori scurried through the palace grounds they were eyed with interest. Of course, he was a newcomer to the kingdom and he was already doing his best to get on the bad side of the king. He was out of breath and his hair kept falling in his face from the pins Kaori had fastened in place. As well as being late he was about to show the king a slovenly appearance! With each step he tried to remind himself to say that it hadn’t been Kaori’s fault. She had done her best and Katsumichi had misunderstood and caused this problem.

Finally they arrived to be received by the king. It looked to be a large hall and Katsumichi hoped there was no more of an audience. Kaori bowed to the guards on the door and gestured for Katsumichi to proceed between the blank-faced guards.

“Aren’t you coming with me?”

“It would be unbecoming of me to attempt to seek audience on such an occasion as this. You’ll be fine, _Denka_. Remain calm.”

Katsumichi nodded and inhaled as an imitation of the deep breathing Kaori was doing. After a few repetitions one of the guards cleared their throat. Of course. He was already late. He bowed to Kaori and the two guards before proceeding.

Inside, there was another door with yet more guards standing to attention. Katsumichi bowed to both of them and walked through the door they opened for him. He paused in the doorway. The throne was at the far end of the room at the top of a small staircase. The platform was around waist height but it was enough to give the king the vantage point he needed in the room. Along the sides of the rooms were pillars with low railings which divided the room into a T-shape. The platform at the end and the space leading up to it clearly the main area for proceedings and the partitioned areas that may be for spectators.

It differed to the main hall of Johzenji which was divided in two – one third of the room with tiered seats for the people of the court and the other two-thirds where the king spoke to subjects.

The Shiratorizawa layout had a major disadvantage for Katsumichi. He was instantly visible and any attention was funnelled directly to him as he hesistated in the doorway. Prince Taichi was in _seiza_ in front of the king at the bottom of the steps.

Katsumichi got into _seiza_ and bowed. He rose to speak, his voice irritatingly thin. “Prince Katsumichi, the Fifth Child and Fourth Prince of Johzenji, Spouse of Prince Taichi, the Twelfth Child and Seventh Prince of Shiratorizawa apologises for my lateness, _Heika_ , The Fearsome King of Shiratorizawa.” He dropped back into his bow and waited to be addressed.

“I’m glad you could finally join us, Prince Katsumichi. You should come in and sit beside your spouse.”

“Thank you,” Katsumichi said, rising from his bow slowly and standing to walk further into the room. Prince Taichi gave him an inscrutable look but by the time Katsumichi was sitting down beside him, he was staring forwards.

The King of Shiratorizawa was an old man. His thick, bushy eyebrows were still startlingly black in contrast with the streaked grey of his hair. It was difficult to tell from down on the floor, but there were rumours that The King was not a tall man. Height had nothing to do with intimidation. Katsumichi could barely raise his eyes to the man.

“I should hope this is not indicative of the future of your marriage. You should be united in intention and action.”

“I apologise once again,” Katumichi said. “I have dishonoured both you, the Fearsome King of Shiratorizawa, and my family with my inappropriate conduct. I beg your forgiveness.”

When he rose up from the bow, Prince Taichi was giving him a funny look again but he would have to wait until later to question it. He looked forwards at the King and breathes how Kaori had shown him.

“Are you afraid of me, Prince Katsumichi?”

Katsumichi didn’t know what the right answer was. He was very afraid. It was doubtful that anything bad would happen to him but to disappoint any king would bring huge punishments. He was married now so the punishment would fall not only on himself but on Prince Taichi. They had not even been married for a full day and already Katsumichi was shredding Prince Taichi’s reputation within Shiratorizawa.

“No, _Heika_ ,” Kastumichi said. “Your reputation as a wise and fair king is known throughout the many kingdoms of the Archipelago of Japan. There is no need to fear a wise and fair king as yourself.”

“Yet I have been given the epithet ‘Fearsome’. What do you think that means?” The King asked, his tone too even. It was as though he were commenting on the strength of the wind, the abrasiveness of sand, in a way that removed himself from the situation entirely.

Katsumichi had no idea how King were bestowed epithets, though he would assume to earn an adjective like ‘fearsome’ one would in fact have to be scary. The great wars of the land had mostly taken place before Katsumichi was even born. There were rumours of smaller kingdoms amassing their combative power in suspicious and mysterious ways that meant nothing good for the peace of the region. For over a quarter of a century the kingdoms of the area had existed in peace and the turbulent times of past were not discussed at length – at least Katsumichi hadn’t heard anything of them. He could not even imagine what acts would make people unanimously refer to a person as ‘fearsome’.

“ _Heika_ , what would you hope to achieve by asking a question such as this?” Prince Taichi asked, his clear voice smashing through the fug of half-formed thoughts in Katsumichi’s head.

“I was simply curious.”

“Rather than to incite fear, the epithet came from an ability to incite awe in the hearts and minds of others, _Heika_ ,” Katsumichi eventually said. He tried to smile at Prince Taichi but the other prince’s eyes were fixed on The King.

“Very diplomatic,” The King said. “It was nice to meet you, Prince Katsumichi, however Prince Taichi tells me that the two of you have another engagement. You may both be excused. I wish the two of you the best of luck in your marriage.”

Katsumichi bowed and thanked the King. He started to rise when he noticed that Prince Taichi was still on the ground, staring up at the king expressionlessly. He was wondering whether he should say something when Prince Taichi bowed silently and stood. He walked with Katsumichi to the door and they left without another word.

Once outside the building, passing through both sets of doors and feeling so much lighter for it, Katsumichi could not help but sigh in relief. As abrupt as the ending of the meeting was, he was glad to be out of the stifling hall. The air was cool and he relished the sweep of the breeze across his skin.

“I’m glad that’s over.”

“Hmm?”

“I mean no disrespect, of course.”

Prince Taichi shook his head. “We will be moving into our home tomorrow. It is doubtful that we will be having another audience with him for a long while.”

“Does that make you upset?”

Prince Taichi started walking and Katsumichi followed. Presumably they were heading straight for lunch.

“I won’t lie and pretend that my father doesn’t have too many children to care about. He knows us by face, he knows us by name, but I doubt he could match many of us with our mothers,” Prince Taichi said wryly. “He’s an odd man. Perhaps he was more agreeable in his youth. Power and old age must have made him that way.”

Katsumichi stumbled a few steps and he quietly thanked Prince Taichi for the arm he was being offered. “Was that bad, what just happened?”

Prince Taichi shrugged. “I don’t find him a pleasant person to be around. Insufferable might be too far but he doesn’t have time for anybody who isn’t Prince Jin or Prince Wakatoshi.” He stopped suddenly and Katsumichi walked straight into him. “Sorry. I just wanted to be completely certain that you understand our position.”

“Of course. It’s fine.”

“I’m going to explain it just in case.” The look Prince Taichi gave him was condescending but Katsumichi could hardly refute the basis that the look was directed to him on. “Prince Jin will be the next king. We have no status or station in this palace. This arrangement is just convenient enough to ensure Johzenji don’t wage war on Shiratorizawa. We will be given land and a home and we won’t want for food, but we are just two men who happen to have royal families. If you would prefer a marriage with more status and a better life than what I can give you there is still time to go back. Our marriage has not been confirmed by your house and they can still contest that we have not consummated the marriage.”

Katsumichi took a step back. The breathing that Kaori showed him was proving to be useful again. “Did you not want to marry me, Prince Taichi?”

“What?”

“We haven’t even been married for a whole day and all you have been doing is asking me if I want to go back on it. I’m sorry if I’m not what you expected but I’m not going back home without giving this a try.”

Prince Taichi looked taken-aback. He blinked dumbly at Katsumichi a few times and said, “I’m sorry. I haven’t been thinking about how you must feel. Well, I’ve been trying to think about how you feel but I think that perhaps you weren’t ready to get married.”

“I’m ready.”

“You’re right,” Prince Taichi said slowly. “Please forgive me for any disrespect I may have caused you.”

“It’s fine. For now, don’t we have another engagement to attend?” Katsumichi asked, hoping he sounded fun or cheerful to some degree. Prince Taichi nodded and led the way.


	3. Marriage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Following their audience with the King, Prince Katsumichi and Prince Taichi meet with another of the married couples of Shiratorizawa.

The household of Prince Reon, the Third Child and Fourth Prince of Shiratorizawa and his spouse, Lady Mai of Date was within walking distance of the main palace. The walk was a short one, just ten minutes along a path that ran parallel with a shallow stream. Apparently Katsumichi and Prince Taichi’s future home would be much further away. It wasn’t clear whether that was because it reduced the distance between their home and Johzenji by an hour or so, or because Prince Taichi held no favour in the kingdom.

If proximity were the judge of favour, though Prince Reon’s home was just a short walk away from the King’s home, several other princes who lived right in the palace without a care would surely have been in greater favour with the king.

Katsumichi and Prince Taichi were greeted by a servant with a strict face. She regarded the two of them for just a moment before bowing and showing them through the gates and leading them to where they would eat. There was a veranda overlooking a very large pond. The water was deep green and lighter particles of algae floated to the top between wide lily pads. The lilies on the pond were not fully open, the petal cups enticing tiny gnats and dragon flies. The reeds around the edge of the pond rustled and Katsumichi wondered what creatures were disturbing them along with the breeze.

Prince Reon and Lady Mai were standing beside the table to greet them.

“It is very nice to meet you, Prince Katsumichi,” Lady Mai said with a wide smile and a short bow. “I am glad to be able to welcome you into our home.”

Just as he was about to introduce himself formally, Lady Mai stepped forward and took Katsumichi’s hands into her own smaller hands. They were soft and warm and Katsumichi felt his own palms getting clammier. He had been in a perpetual state of nerves since his arrival in this kingdom but having somebody else so aware of it made him feel worse. He tried to pull his hands away but she tightened her grip.

“Prince Katsumichi, we’re family now,” She said softly. “Please treat me as you would any other child of your house. Would you be able to do that?”

Katsumichi nodded and tried to smile. Of course. They were family now, which meant absolutely nothing in families like these. Prince Taichi had been frank about not being ambitious. Katsumichi wondered whether Prince Reon was the same way – his marriage surely could not have defaulted any claim to the throne so a personal choice must have been made to live without such a prominent aim. Lady Mai agreeing to such a thing seemed odd to Katsumichi seeing as it would have made more sense for her family to want a stronger hold on Shiratorizawa.

But there was no reason for her to deceive Katsumichi.

She released his hands and he sat down when he was invited to do so. Prince Taichi sat beside him and offered a stiff smile. He sighed loudly and said, “Lady Mai has never been this kind to me.”

“I might have to agree with you there,” Prince Reon commented jovially.

“The two of you have been spoiled enough in your lives,” She said primly, then, “Lady Yue told me to look out for him.”

“Ah, so this is you apologising for the behaviour of my mother.”

“No,” Lady Mai denied hotly. The flush on her face gave her away even as she shook her head, “I would only ever apologise for the actions of myself or Prince Reon. Or our servants, but they are all wonderful people with good souls so I would never have to apologise for them.”

Prince Taichi hummed flatly and Prince Reon smiled broadly. “Prince Katsumichi, how many of our brothers have you been introduced to so far?”

“Just yourself, Prince Reon,” Katsumichi said as the stone-faced servant from before approached the table to pour _sake_ into small cups. “And Prince Wakatoshi.”

The sound Prince Taichi made was unhuman and it was all Katsumichi could do to strike at his back in alarm. “Are you alright, Prince Taichi?”

He continued spluttering and coughing for a few moments more, twisted to the side and covering his face with his sleeves until he was breathing normally and not choking on nothing. He sat up straight, face still flush and eyes watering from the choking, and squinted at Katsumichi. “You met the second prince?”

“Ah, in the bath this morning.”

“Prince Wakatoshi loves bathing. What was he like?” Prince Reon pressed.

It was a very short encounter and they hardly exchanged more than a few words following their introductions. The initial impression that Prince Wakatoshi had made still remained. Katsumichi said, “Big.”

“It appears that you have some competition, Taichi,” Prince Reon said, calm against the stifled cackling of his wife beside him. Lady Mai was barely remaining on her chair as she laughed and Prince Reon’s mouth was beginning to twitch at the blankness of his brother’s face.

“Big?” Prince Taichi echoed.

“Yes, he is very tall.”

“So am I,” Prince Taichi said curtly. Lady Mai snorted even louder on the other side of the table and she was clutching at Prince Reon’s shoulder. 

Katsumichi patted his shoulders and added, “And broad.”

Prince Taichi’s jaw was tense as he stared at a distant point over the top of Prince Reon’s head. His nostrils flared as he breathed in deeply and it seemed that Kaori had been sharing her breathing techniques with lots of people around the palace. He looked back to Katsumichi with an entirely neutral expression. “I try not to ask too much of you, Prince Katsumichi, but for the harmony of our marriage I am asking you to monitor your thoughts before they come out of your mouth.”

Katsumichi pushed his chair back swiftly and stood to bow before Prince Taichi. As spirited as Prince Reon and Lady Mai had been by Katsumichi’s words, they were obviously not appreciated. “I apologise for my mistake, Prince Taichi. I will endeavour not to disappoint you again in future.”

“Please sit down.”

Katsumichi sat down quietly. Lady Mai and Prince Reon were no longer laughing.

“Prince Taichi–”

“Don’t,” Prince Reon said warningly. Lady Mai shook off the hand he placed on her shoulder and glared at Prince Taichi.

“Do you always make him apologise to you like this?”

“I don’t _make_ him do anything.”

“Evidently you didn’t _make_ him feel comfortable with you either,” Lady Mai said, sounding increasingly more shrill. “You are both of royal birth so you should live and marry as equals. Or does it feel good to have a spouse who is always looking to you for approval? Your pride and whatever humiliation you are feeling should make way for a harmonious co-existence. You’re married now and you should do more to show your support and appreciation for your spouse.”

She huffed and stood up. “May I be excused, _Denka_? I fear that we shan’t appreciate what might happen next."

Lady Mai stalked off without another word and the strict-looking servant followed her. Prince Reon sighed and watched her go. When she was gone he looked back to Prince Taichi. “I’ll acknowledge that she was out of line for scolding you like that, but I won’t apologise for what she said.”

Prince Taichi nodded. “That’s fair. Should we take our leave?”

Prince Reon shook his head and smiled softly. “She will be back soon. I just think that she might be worried about Prince Katsumichi.”

“Me? Why? Lady Mai shouldn’t feel burdened by my arrival; I will do nothing to upset the balance here at Shiratorizawa. Johzenji have no quarrels with any of the kingdoms or noble families of the region, especially not Date.”

“No, she feels worried for you personally,” Prince Reon clarified. “Before me, she was betrothed to a child of Aoba Johsai. When she arrived she learnt something of the family which was grounds for dissolution of the marriage. She hardly had time to return home before her family accepted our request to marry one of their children. They sent her here immediately. She knows loneliness better than most.”

Rumours of Aoba Johsai’s family had reached Johzenji. It wasn’t certain how true the rumours were but Katsumichi head heard that the heir of Aoba Johsai had stubbornly refused to marry a child of Date; Aoba Johsai was a wreck and the blue castle was barely standing after decades of disrepute draining the family treasury; Aoba Johsai had invented a child for Lady Mai to marry. It was difficult to tell how try rumours like this were and it was always worse to ask just in case Aoba Johsai’s reputation would never recover.

All of the royal and noble houses of the area had certain rumours circulation around them but working on the basis of rumours would not maintain the peace of the area. Still, Shiratorizawa was not the home of rumours of such a high calibre and Katsumichi’s history was nothing like Lady Mai’s.

“There’s no need for her to worry about me so much.”

“Well at least one of her brothers was supposed to marry into the family too. It was probably some sort of ploy to overthrow one of the royal houses of the area,” Prince Reon said matter of fact. “Whatever Mai learnt was a big enough betrayal that Date turned their backs on Aoba Johsai and dissolved all contracts and pacts they had in place. Or so I have been told.”

“I still don’t understand.”

“You and your whole family could have been wiped out. But you’re safe here. Maybe she feels sorry. She had heard about your encounter with Lady Yue but they haven’t seen each other since before you arrived.”

Katsumichi looked over at Prince Taichi who was just as clueless as he was. It made him wonder whether Prince Reon was sharing open information or a secret that had never been heard outside of this home.  He looked back at Prince Reon’s face, open and trustworthy, though Katsumichi supposed many people could school their features to look that way. He swallowed the small lump in his throat before it grew any bigger.

“How do you know it was Johzenji? Couldn’t it have been Shiratorizawa?” Katsumichi asked. Prince Taichi gasped quietly, his face not giving him away, but Katsumichi definitely heard the sound. He would wait to see whether either of the other princes were offended by his words, whether he would need to apologise before he acted.

“I don’t know,” Prince Reon said. “Shiratorizawa doesn’t have an Iron Wall, after all. But we have Prince Wakatoshi.”

“And Crown Prince Jin,” Prince Taichi cut in fiercely.

There was a moment when the brothers locked eyes, neither of their expressions faltering. Then Prince Reon nodded slowly and leaned back in his seat. Relaxed as though all they had spoken about was the temperature of the water in the pond behind him. “Yes,” He agreed. “We have him too.”

It remained quiet after Prince Reon spoke, and the brothers were no longer looking at one another. Katsumichi didn’t know whether he was allowed to speak, whether the silence was too heavy for him to bear with inane words designed to fill the space between them all. As Lady Mai was no longer sitting in front of him there was only the empty chair and the railing which disrupted his sight of the pond. The surface bubbled minutely and Katsumichi wondered what was expelling gas below the surface. The creature, whatever it was, was gone seconds later and the surface of the pond was still again. Only the wind blew over the tension of the water.

With it, the breeze brought the force to puncture the tension of the air.

Lady Mai returned, her face pleasant as she approached with a handful of servants in tow. She bowed before the table and smiled at them radiantly as she straightened her back. “I apologise for my absence,” her words seemed sharp with a target within her aim. “I have returned, a gracious host to welcome our guests.”

“Thank you, Mai, I am certain our guests feel more refreshed for your presence,” Prince Reon said, a slight smile about his lips that was magnified in his eyes. He took his wife’s hand as she took her seat once more. “I do believe it is time we eat.”

At Prince Reon’s words the servants who had returned to the table with Lady Mai placed down the dishes they had been carrying with them. There was a tray piled with meat, slices of pork glistening in fat and whole chickens stacked upon one another, the fragrance of the herbs and cloves that had been stuffed into them before they were boiled making Katsumichi’s mouth water. Fat ribbons of beef were piled like noodles, on one side of the tray, spilling over the edge. One dish was filled with sliced radish and Chinese cabbage, green onions, and carrots.

As the son of a king, Katsumichi had never thought himself poor. Never before in his life had he seen so much food served to just four people.

“There’s a lot of food,” He said.

Lady Mai nodded happily. “You don’t need to force yourself.” They all said thanks for the food and Lady Mai started spooning rice into a bowl and offered it to Katsumichi.

As they ate, Lady Mai asked about Johzenji. It had only been a day and a half since he had last seen them, but Katsumichi missed his brothers dearly. He missed playing games with his brothers, and going into the market with Runa as she explained the concept of commerce to him in detail that went right over Katsumichi’s head. He missed throwing and catching balls with Runa and Nobuyoshi, and he missed listening to Arata play new instruments with virtuosity that Katsumichi envied. He missed Takeharu and Rintarou reciting poems with sharper and sharper barbs. He missed Kazuma taking him out to ride and introducing him to the family he had befriended under the guise of being a nomad; he missed the way Yuuji would grin at him and tell him everything was fine, that he would take care of everything.

Before Katsumichi had set off for Shiratorizawa, Yuuji had been the last to see him into his carriage with a tight hug that squeezed all the air from his lungs. He had called Katsumichi brave and thanked him for what he was doing for the kingdom.

His throat got drier and his answers shorter and Lady Mai looked happy to ask Prince Reon about how he was enjoying the food.

They left shortly afterwards.

The walk back to the main grounds of the castle was slow. Katsumichi felt full of food and weighed down by how gloomy he must have seemed as lunch had come to a close. The stream flowed beside them, drifting in the direction of Prince Reon and Lady Mai’s home. The breeze blew in the same direction and that seemed to be enough resistance against the burden of Katsumichi’s body.

“Prince Katsumichi.” Prince Taichi stopped his stride and held his hand out. Katsumichi hesitated but took Prince Taichi’s hand and followed when he was led away from the path. They moved across the lawn at a relaxed pace until they reached a copse of trees that was much further away than it had looked.

“Are you alright?” Katsumichi asked when they stopped under the shade.

“I was about to ask you the same thing.”

Katsumichi swallowed and hoped he really hadn’t been as miserable as he had suspected he had been acting. “Why would you ask me such a thing, Prince Taichi?”

“Why would you ask me?” He retorted. Katsumichi wasn’t sure what he could say in response to that. He supposed his question did sound silly. “I’m sorry that you have to be away from your family.”

So he really was obvious about how much he missed his family. “It is no trouble.”

Prince Taichi shook his head and ducked his head closer as though he was about to share a secret. “It is a lot of trouble and knowing that I have burdened you this much makes me feel more apologetic towards you than anybody else in the world.”

The change from earlier, when Katsumichi wasn’t quite sure why he was being scolded in public, was drastic enough that Katsumichi felt suspicious of Prince Taichi. He knew it was terrible to think that way but he was sure he was not pitiful enough to make a person change their whole perspective. Or perhaps he felt he had to be nicer in case Katsumichi reported back to Johzenji that they should join forces with Aoba Johsai or Karasuno to overthrow Shiratorizawa. It had been an odd afternoon and though Katsumichi felt that his eyes had been opened to some things he wished he could have remained ignorant for just a bit longer.

He was continually going to say things which irritated Prince Taichi; Aoba Johsai really did have a big secret; the noble families of the region were probably more dangerous than the royal families with their elevated freedom to move and meet; Johzenji were vulnerable to the families they had surrounded themselves with; and worst of all, the passage of time was still measurable in increments of hours but Katsumichi already missed home.

But he was a grown up and he had responsibilities, no matter how insignificant. If bringing Johzenji into marginally better favour with Shiratorizawa was what he had to do he would do everything he could to keep things that way.

“You shouldn’t feel sorry.”

“But I do,” Prince Taichi said quietly enough that Katsumichi could barely make out the words from his breathing. “I feel so on-edge all the time because I don’t know what to make of you. I want to get to know you and learn who you are and learn how I can make you happy to be with me.”

“That’s very romantic, Prince Taichi,” Katsumichi said as quietly as he could without whispering. Prince Taichi snorted and grasped at Katsumichi’s hands tightly enough for tingles of numbness to bloom.

“I suppose you don’t care much for romance, do you?”

There was once a point when he might have cared a great deal for the thrill of a private romance, but that was a relic of a time since passed. He had been hopeful when he was younger that he could have an easy romance, yet he was soon shown how wrong he had been about that. Any affections he once held in his chest had withered over the years as he grew older and further from the person he had hoped to be. He should have had the foresight to be realistic from the start and understand that he wouldn’t always have a choice in matters such as these.

There were no practicalities to romance when diplomacy was what had brought him to this kingdom in the first place. There were a lot of ways of dealing peaceably with people that Katsumichi was knowledgeable in. He knew how to read and write letters, he knew how to hold a conversation, he knew how to address his father – the person within Johzenji’s borders who the gods favoured the most, and he knew how to make his brothers and sisters laugh as they knew how to get the same reaction from him. Being married for political gain was something he had known to expect since his childhood despite the fanciful deviation of his adolescence. The most romantic thing he had witnessed in his life was his father naming horses after his wives and concubines.

“I can’t say I particularly understand why it would be necessary at this point,” Katsumichi allowed.

“I could teach you about it if you’d like.”

Katsumichi supposed he had much to learn if being so hot and cold was a trait of a person well-versed in romance. It probably meant different things to different people anyway. He was being given the opportunity to ask but he didn’t like to do so just in case he was suddenly accused of ruining the marriage. As they were married, he supposed it wouldn’t hurt to let Prince Taichi ‘teach’ him. He shrugged his shoulders and said, “You can do what you like.”

He had kept his tone light but a part of him was glad that barbs below the affable tone has scratched at Prince Taichi somewhat. Prince Taichi only let his face harden for a moment before he smoothed out his countenance and looked very hard at Katsumichi’s eyes.

“I want to kiss you,” He finally said.

“Why?”

“Because I like you,” Was Prince Taichi’s reply. He sounded for all the world as though he was lying. Katsumichi doubted infant children would have believed such a lie and he tried not to laugh in the other prince’s face considering their proximity.

“Of course.”

“You don’t believe me?”

“Would you?” Katsumichi asked incredulously. “We only met yesterday and all you’ve done since then is look down upon me. Lady Mai was right; we’re both princes and you shouldn’t be acting superior just because this is a more comfortable situation for you.”  

Prince Taichi scoffed, a sound that Katsumichi was sure he would be getting used to. “Superior?”

“That’s right. You know so much more than I do about everything except for how to not be the worst person in the world!”

Katsumichi knew what a kiss was. His mother used to kiss him on the forehead when he was very young. Runa kissed him on the cheek by way of greeting. Yuuji sometimes kissed him on the crown of his head when he felt like being cheeky. Katsumichi had once kissed a friend without a care in the world simply because he could. Hana had kissed her spouse on their wedding day when she was wearing her lovely, glittering _sokutai_.

There were so many types of kisses that Katsumichi knew about. Prince Taichi holding his face close to his and pressing their mouths together hard enough for Katsumichi to feel like his teeth might pop out his gums was new. The pressure eased for long enough for Taichi to change the angle of his face, so their noses weren’t smushed together quite so uncomfortably, and he could part his lips to pull at Katsumichi’s lower lip.

When Prince Taichi pulled away his cheeks were pink and his breathing was heavier than it had been before.

“You really are the worst,” Katsumichi said, hoping that he didn’t look as obviously embarrassed as Prince Taichi.

“I know. I’m sorry.”


	4. Gift

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The marriage is confirmed with an official visit from Johzenji.

Katsumichi had taken it upon himself to count the days since the kiss. It seemed prudent to know how long ago it had occurred. He didn’t bother with the little things like counting how many times Prince Taichi apologised to him for the action without mentioning what it was, and he didn’t count the times Prince Taichi avoided his gaze and stalked off in irritation.

They didn’t see each other very often in their new home. Their rooms were near each other on the grounds, but Prince Taichi spent most of his time in the study, apparently reading. Katsumichi preferred to sit outside while it was sunny.

A large river ran through their grounds and Katsumichi found himself skimming stones across the surface. Or he attempted to. The current was strong enough on some days that the smooth pebbles he had meticulously chosen would be swallowed up by the water and sink to the bottom. It got boring after a while and Katsumichi supposed he couldn’t very well do this for the rest of his life.

Today it had been six days since the kiss, five days since they had moved to the home gifted to them by Shiratorizawa. It had been seven days since they were married. Today, they would be paid a visit by officials from Johzenji to verify the marriage for their records.

Last night, Katsumichi had listened to Eri blush and stutter her way through an explanation about what was generally a metric by which a marriage could be confirmed. He supposed that Kaori and Eri had drawn straws to do the honour of explaining sex to him. He wondered briefly why Prince Taichi wouldn’t explain it to him but then he remembered he was mostly being avoided after the kiss.

Katsumichi felt sorry for Eri, being tasked with such a thing, but he was curious as to how she was so knowledgeable about all of it. She had stumbled over words like ‘sensual’ and even ‘comfortable’ with her hands clenched into fists in her lap and her eyes fixed on her _hakama_ , yet she had pressed on with anatomical terms and what sort of results were to be expected. By the time Eri was red enough to present herself as a very real warning, Katsumichi stopped her with a tight smile.

“You’ve worked hard, Eri, but honestly, this was a bit redundant.”

“Why? Do you need me to go over anything again?” She asked weakly.

Katsumichi shook his head. “It’s not that. Only, I think there was something of a misunderstanding. I just felt a bit bad about interrupting you. But thank you for inconveniencing yourself like this.”

“Oh, no! It wasn’t any trouble!” Eri exclaimed, the flush of her face deepening as she seemed to realise what Katsumichi meant. “I apologise for disturbing you like this.”

“There’s no need for that. I’m glad that should I have needed some advice it was readily available,” Katsumichi said awkwardly. Eri made herself scarce after that. Katsumichi truly hoped that it hadn’t been too much of a bother for her.

It could have been the usual sort of thing in Shiratorizawa, that an education like that was commonplace. Katsumichi could have done with something like that when he was young and had woken in bed in the dead of night, erect and his skin thrumming with the need for… something. It was not until he had left the palace he had grown up in with his siblings and ventured off to the town where his mother had once lived that he started to realise the purpose of it all. He was already eighteen before he had understood how easily a touch could undo a person or how terrifying it could be to admit that the desire to simply undress another person. Up to that point in his life he had been painfully shy of the world adults knew well.

Alone, just the whooshing of the river flow and the distant chirping of birds, Katsumichi felt his face grow hot. He felt that he was eighteen again, still uncertain about how any of that sort of stuff went. It might have been easier if he hadn’t lied about not knowing. If he had admitted that he had done more than enough to consummate a marriage he had hoped for a lifetime before now, he might easily have been able to consummate his marriage to Prince Taichi rather than to at this point, a week later, have to lie about how he had satiated certain desires with the person he was married to.

Or admitting he already knew could have made Prince Taichi averse to his touch, made him wonder what value the marriage had if there were no children nor substantial political gain from it. Katsumichi could have easily been cast from Shiratorizawa, forced to return shamefaced to Johzenji and hope that he was in insignificant enough a position that the loss of his spouse wouldn’t impact too greatly upon the relationship between the two kingdoms.

He wondered whether it would be worth it to go through with it. At this point he could claim that Eri convinced him to go through with it and get it over with. He would have to be convincing as he coquettishly tittered about how he had never considered there would be such exciting and wonderful things in the world that only marriage could provide. Though he wasn’t sure that was what somebody who had never experienced those things would have to say on the matter.

He felt as though he was eighteen again but he couldn’t for the life of him remember what it was that he had known at that time.

He thought better of the idea. He opted for lying alone and wondering just how it would be to know Prince Taichi until he was sweaty and spent and sleep took him easily.

 

The pebbles behind Katsumichi were disturbed by swift, purposeful steps. He didn’t turn to see who it was because he was certain it wasn’t Eri who he hadn’t seen all morning, and it wasn’t Kaori who often grumbled and complained about having to walk over unsteady ground. He exhaled and relaxed the line of his shoulders. Prince Taichi still didn’t speak. He had stopped two metres away.

“Do you have business with me, _Denka_?”

“You know I hate it when you address me that way,” Prince Taichi said quietly.

“You’ve never mentioned it before.”

“But you have.” It sounded accusatory. He had every right to sound that way. Probably. He sighed and the sound of his footsteps cracked on the pebbles as he approached. He sat beside Katsumichi and stared out at the current of the river. “Anabara-san has arrived from Johzenji. It would be rude to keep him waiting.”

“You’ve kept me waiting. I’ve kept you waiting.”

“When did I keep you waiting?” Prince Taichi asked sharply. He was about to take back his words but Katsumichi gave him his answer.

“This is the first time you have sought me out since we came to live at the West River. You don’t eat with me, you don’t speak with me, and I’ve not seen any trace of intention to spend even the briefest of moments with me. What am I supposed to tell Anabara-san when he asks whether our marriage has been consummated?”

Prince Taichi exhaled sharply. “I could fuck you right here and you could tell him how that feels.”

“Probably not very nice.” The sound Prince Taichi made at that could have been humour or derision, it was hard to tell, but Katsumichi went on nonetheless. “You were so careful around me for the first day we knew each other. Then you avoided me. And now this… hostility. Are you eager to take a second spouse so soon?”

“Hostility. That sounds a bit extreme, don’t you think?” Prince Taichi asked. Katsumichi stayed quiet at that. It sounded extreme because it was meant to. “Is that what you want me to do? Take a second spouse? You’d be nothing around here if I did that.”

“Yet you’re nothing around here without me having to do such a thing.”

Prince Taichi dropped back against the ground and growled, frustration and pain. Katsumichi wondered whether he was seeing stars, whether the sharp points of stones on the back of his head was enough to draw blood. “I really did intend to fall in love with you, you know. We are the same age and we are in the middle of many siblings so I thought that would be a good basis. My family were desperate to marry me off but my mother was adamant that we stay here in Shiratorizawa. She didn’t want to lose something that had taken her quarter of a century to build. I thought I could maintain that and live a life that I had dreamed of.”

“You’d both have been better off coming to Johzenji. My brother is the crown prince.”

“So is mine.”

“No, Crown Prince Yuuji and I have the same mother,” Katsumichi said plainly. Of course all of his brothers were his siblings but the common denominator was the king. It was different with Yuuji and Runa because all three of them had the same mother All of his other siblings, aside from Hana and Kazuma had separate mothers. It must have been lonely, he supposed.

Prince Taichi sat up stiffly and squinted at Katsumichi. “Then why did you marry me?”

“Anabara-san told me to,” Katsumichi said, standing fluidly. “Are you coming? It would be rude to make him wait.”

The pair of them walked back to the main compound of their home. The path ran parallel along the river, their route taking them upstream. It felt familiar and foreign all at once. The two of them had not spent so much time together since they had moved to their home along the West River.  

When they arrived at the reception room, Katsumichi’s heart stopped beating in his chest. “Arata!”

The youngest of Katsumichi’s brothers was sitting beside Anabara, a small smile on his face. He stood up to bow. “Prince Arata, the Eighth Child and Seventh Prince of Johzenji has come to give my regards to Prince Katsumichi, the Fifth Child and Fourth Prince and Johzenji and his spouse, Prince Taichi, the Twelfth Child and Seventh Prince of Shiratorizawa.”

“We warmly accept your greeting,” Prince Taichi said, bowing.

“Arata!” Katsumichi said loudly, opening his arms wide. There wasn’t even a moment of hesitation before Arata’s arms were around Katsumichi squeezing him tightly and swaying from side to side.

“Are you sure you want to stay here? We all miss you dearly,” Arata muttered into Katsumishi’s chest. Of course he was not sure that he _wanted_ to stay here because it was boring and lonely here. But he had to stay here. He wasn’t going to be the reason relations between their two kingdoms splintered.

“Don’t worry about me. I miss you too,” he said. They pulled away from one another and Arata grinned.

“I didn’t want to impose but considering I was travelling this way anyway I simply had to see how you were doing.”

They all sat around the table that had been set up for Anabara’s arrival. Eri and Kaori set down a platter of chopped fruits and poured tea for each of them.

The week since Katsumichi had seen his brothers had felt like a decade, and he was refreshed just hearing about the provincial goings-on back home. There was always something to do or somebody to talk to in Johzenji and it was completely different to the stagnant silence of Shiratorizawa.

Kazuma and Takeharu had gotten into some quarrel that nobody knew too much about. It seemed that each of them were imploring the rest of their brothers to take their side; Takeharu apparently successful in getting Rintarou and Nobuyoshi to spend extended periods time with him and block their ears to anything that Kazuma attempted to say to them. Katsumichi wished that he was there, to know what it was his brothers were fighting over, to be able to rationally decide who was in the right or wrong. But he was here, several hours away from his family and numb to it all.

It was decided that Katsumichi and Arata could go out to play together after Anabara’s more official dealings were done. Not wanting to hear the particulars himself, Arata excused himself and asked Eri – who looked more thankful for his offer than anything else in the world – to show him around the grounds. The area was new to her too but the excuse was good enough.

“I take it your time here in Shiratorizawa has been pleasant,” Anabara said, looking down his nose at a document that Katsumichi would rather not know the contents of.

“Of course, uncle. I have married well and found a good match in Prince Taichi.”

The look he received from the prince to his left was nothing short of a glower. Some people hadn’t lived their entire lives as royals without learning to manage their expressions.

“I’m glad to hear that. The family of the Kingdom of Johzenji were honoured to have the opportunity to form a union with the Kingdom of Shiratorizawa,” Anabara said solemnly, inclining his head towards Prince Taichi.

“We too, at the Kingdom of Shiratorizawa, were glad to be able to form such an advantageous union with a kingdom as noble as Johzenji,” He said in a flat voice. Anabara did not flinch at what felt like a veneer of hostility.

“Ah, Prince Taichi is not a very expressive person, yet in such a short time I have been able to discern the smallest change in his mood and condition so that I know the truth of his thoughts,” Katsumichi insisted quickly.

“I see. I take it that such a sensitive relationship was consummated well.”

“Of course,” Katsumichi said brightly. His face felt hot and he was thankful for his body unconsciously aiding him that much. He avoided his uncle’s gaze and stared down at the orange rind on the plate in front of him. “Prince Taichi is a wonderful spouse.”

“Of course,” Anabara said curtly. “We received copies of the documents confirming your marriage and as Johzenji have been able to confirm that the marriage is a complete union, we extend our deepest wishes that you live well together.”

“Thank you very much, uncle. We will be happy with those wishes in mind.”

They all stood and Anabara bowed to them lowly. “I hope you don’t think me rude but I wish to be able to view the grounds myself.”

“Of course,” Prince Taichi said. “The weather is good and it would be a shame not to take advantage of it. Will you require a guide?”

Anabara considered this for a moment and then nodded. “That would be most appreciated. To conclude the visit here, Johzenji has bestowed upon the two of you a gift. I hope your guide would be willing to assist me with the… offering.”

Kaori escorted Anabara from the room and Katsumichi could only hope that Prince Taichi was as in the dark as he was after hearing words like that.

“You are unbelievable,” Prince Taichi said in a low voice.

“Interesting, because Anabara-san certainly seemed to believe me.”

“A wonderful spouse,” Prince Taichi muttered darkly. “That was your chance to be rid of me and marry somebody who understands you better.”

Katsumichi glanced up at Prince Taichi for the briefest of moments. “I wonder when it will be that you stop trying to make me leave.”

He left Prince Taichi behind to search for Arata on the grounds. There wasn’t much of interest around the residence at West River. A few trees that would be fun to climb if one was a child whose weight the branches could bear, the river itself where Katsumichi spent so much time sitting on the banks, an undulating lawn that was uncomfortable to sit on, and of course Prince Taichi’s small library. Yet Arata and Eri were in none of those places.

Katsumichi was walking slowly, wondering whether he might miss the two of them if he moved too quickly. They were sitting on the veranda that joined Katsumichi’s room to Prince Taichi’s. Upon seeing this, Katsumichi reduced the weight he placed on his feet with each pace. Eri was laughing quietly, covering her mouth with her friends and looking shy at Arata. Warmth sparked in Katsumichi’s stomach. It would be nice if Arata might make friends with Eri and, despite her station, think of her as a reason to visit.

He couldn’t creep any closer in case he disturbed them but Arata was making Eri laugh harder and harder. Katsumichi hadn’t seen Eri laugh like that before, so open, and Arata’s face was brimming with pride. It was the same face he had made when he was fourteen and he had first learned to play the _koto_ he had been gifted the year before. The last time Katsumichi had seen it was when Arata was able to purchase a _veena_ to learn to play last year.  

He probably shouldn’t stay to watch. He turned to walk away and had to clap his hands over his mouth to keep himself from yelling out. Prince Taichi grabbed at Katsumichi’s arms and held him steady.

“Why are you following me?” Katsumichi hissed.

“You keep leaving me.”

That was rich. Considering the fact that Prince Taichi hadn’t stopped suggesting the pair of them dissolve the marriage, it didn’t seem to be something that would bother him. The days they had spent in their new home hadn’t featured Prince Taichi following Katsumichi around and begging him to strengthen their relationship. The only explanation was that he wanted to extend their quarrel.

Casting one last glance over his shoulder at Arata and Eri, Katsumichi took Prince Taichi by the hand and tugged him away quietly.

“What do you want?”

Prince Taichi looked chagrined and he swiped a hand over his face. Katsumichi released his other hand just too late and folded his arms.

“Wouldn’t it look better if we stayed together. If we put on a united front?”

“And you don’t think that my uncle is asking Kaori about us right now?” Katsumichi asked. Prince Taichi blinked a few times and stood a bit straighter. “She will tell him all about your short temper. About how everything I do is wrong and you can’t stand to be in the same place as somebody as incompetent as I am.”

“She won’t say anything like that.”

Katsumichi bit his tongue. She wouldn’t have to say things like that if they weren’t true. Prince Taichi sighed and placed his hand on Katsumichi’s bicep, his thumb swiping over the swell of his arm and he leaned in closer.

“I want to kiss you.”

“Again? If you wanted to encourage such behaviour it would probably be better to not ignore me for a week after each time we kiss,” Katsumichi huffed quietly. He could already hear the weak argument that it had only happened once but that was mostly due to the fact that he had been ignored. He raised his sight, an odd rolling in his stomach at the softness of Prince Taichi’s eyes. The way he would suddenly mellow right when Katsumichi’s blood was beginning to boil only exacerbated the heat in his chest. He closed his eyes. “What do you want with me?”

“Let me fall in love with you, please. I only want this one thing,” Prince Taichi whispered.

It was a stupid thing to ask of Katsumichi. It was strange how desperate he was to ‘fall in love’, as though his family did not give him enough care to be content. Whether what he said he wanted was true still hadn’t been proven. For as many times that Prince Taichi had said he wanted to fall in love, there were several more occasions when he encouraged Katsumichi to dissolve the marriage. Still, he nodded his head.

Whether the kiss was nice or not is something that Katsumichi wasn’t sure of. It was more the essence of a kiss than the last time, Prince Taichi’s breath mingling with Katsumichi’s, the anticipation of what the kiss would be like then it surpassed light pecks and restricting himself from pushing into the pressure.

“Prince Katsumichi, I found you!”

Katsumichi stumbled backwards, his arms thrown out for balance as he wheeled around. He didn’t thank Prince Taichi for keeping him steady, the hands on his arms were nothing compared to home. He tore away, his feet stuttering over the unsteady slope of the lawn until he was able to throw his arms around the newcomer.

“Yukie!”

Her chuckle vibrated through Katsumichi’s chest yet she still didn’t feel real at all. He had known Yukie his entire life. She was always around, taken in to learn the ways of serving royals under the tutelage of the direct servants of the king, yet she could barely maintain the tranquil demeanour she was supposed to have adopted. Her grin was goofy when she pushed at Katsumichi’s arms.

“How have you been, Katsumichi?”

At her question the past week became a foggy and distant dream. He supposes it all must have been fine because despite being far from home and surrounded by strangers, he had Yukie in his arms. She had been unchanged by the past week and he could barely believe his luck to be able to see her again.

“I’m fine,” he said, barely keeping his voice level. “What are you doing here?”

She smirked cryptically at him and hummed. She twirled away from him gracelessly and bowed. “I am a gift. As an act of graciousness by the Second Child, Crown Prince Yuuji of the Virtuous Kingdom of Johzenji. You will be in my care from now on.”


	5. Princess Runa

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The marriage still doesn't feel like much of anything but already Prince Katsumichi and Prince Taichi are being tested once more with a second arrival from Johzenji.

Prince Taichi had never promised not to avoid Katsumichi if they kissed again. He hadn’t said anything aside from voice some feeble personal desire. Katsumichi couldn’t say he was surprised, even though he was disappointed, in Prince Taichi’s absence.

He had Yukie though and it was good to see her.

“The kitchens are so far away from your room,” Yukie grumbled as she plonked Katsumichi’s breakfast tray on the small table. Katsumichi only smiled warmly at her entrance and gestured to the seat on the other side of the table. She huffed and rolled her eyes but she sat down anyway. “You are terrible.”

“Is that any way to speak to a prince?”

“Yes, because you are a terrible prince,” Yukie said. “If somebody else comes in and sees me sitting comfortably with you I will be the one to get in trouble.”

“They have to ask to enter. If someone sees it will be your own fault for not getting up quickly enough,” Katsumichi retorted. Yukie grinned. “Do you want some?”

“How kind of you to offer, _Denka_ , but I am just a lowly servant who has no business sharing food with blood as blue as yours,” Yukie said with lilting sarcasm. Katsumichi rolled his eyes but Yukie didn’t need to be asked twice. She helped herself to a skewered fish and wrinkled her nose as she chewed. “What is this? Ayu, perhaps?”

“Why are you asking me? Didn’t you help to prepare it?”

“Do you think I have time for things like that? I’m busy doing important things like drawing baths for you, or cleaning your clothes, or following you around everywhere, or flirting with pretty girls.”

“Like who?” Katsumichi asked with narrowed eyes.

“Don’t speak with your mouth full,” Yukie chided as though she herself didn’t have her mouth stuffed with wasn’t spraying the table with grains of half-chewed rice. “And it’s a secret.”

Katsumichi pouted. “You can’t have secrets from me, we’re practically family.”

Yukie laughed loudly at that. “Considering you’re a prince and I’m a servant, you have some nerve saying things like that.”

There was a knocking on the wooden frame of the door and Yukie’s face fell and her mouth clicked shut. She stood quickly and arranged the food on the table to look as though she hadn’t touched any of it. The way she changed her demeanour always amazed Katsumichi. She lowered her chin and stood with her spine straight and her arms angled out so her palms rested on the _obi_ of her _hakama_.

“You may enter,” Katsumichi called out. The door slid open and Prince Taichi stood to cross the threshold, kneeled inside the room, and closed the door behind him. “Good morning, Prince Taichi.”

“Good morning, Prince Katsumichi,” He said as he stood. “May we speak alone?”

Yukie turned her head bare millimetres and Katsumichi nodded. It was quiet as she left, only the sound of Yukie sliding the door open and closed as she went breaking the silence of the room. It was not until Yukie must have been some distance away that Prince Taichi asked to be able to sit and sat in the chair that had only recently been vacated.

“I think we need to talk.”

“That makes a change.”

Prince Taichi sighed. Katsumichi supposed this was exactly what they were supposed to talk about but it was not a one-sided thing. He watched the conflict act itself out over Prince Taichi’s face until finally the man cleared his throat. “We should practice harbouring feelings of good will towards one another.”

“I think we’ve had enough practice to know that we are going to be terrible at that,” Katsumichi said. Prince Taichi smiled a bit but it wasn’t a happy one.

“It has only been two weeks, there is still time for us to get better. But I think we will need to improve quickly. I received a letter from the main palace. We are to play host to another child of Johzenji indefinitely and I was hoping you weren’t too averse to lying about how happy we are together.”

“What?” Katsumichi asked. His mouth felt dry, unpleasantly so, but it was tinged with the sweetness of getting to see another person he loved. “Who is it?”

“Princess Runa, the Ninth Child and Second Princess of Johzenji. She will be in Shiratorizawa for some sort of education. Even though she will be living with us the letter didn’t say what she will be learning or whether a tutor will be coming with her, but it did say that a date for her return to Johzenji had not yet been decided.”

“That sounds ominous,” Katsumichi said. It was obvious what Prince Taichi was hinting at. There were no plans for Runa to return to Johzenji following the ‘education’ she would receive at Shiratorizawa, meaning it was very possible she would live out the rest of her life here. Katsumichi supposed that at least she would be with somebody she knew, but that was only until was likely married into the Shiratorizawa kingdom and there would be less reason for them to see one another.

He swallowed a few times but his tongue still stuck to the roof of his mouth.

“I have no reason to believe that anything has been decided,” Prince Taichi said quietly.

“What are the rest of your brothers like?”

“They’re not all like me, don’t worry,” Prince Taichi said. Katsumichi snorted but he didn’t feel any particular happiness at hearing that. “Only three of us are married but even then Princess Runa could become a second spouse.”

Katsumichi shook his head. Prince Taichi not going into detail about the personalities of his brothers gave the impression that they weren’t all like him but potentially worse. Runa might be fine if she became the second spouse of the Crown Prince but even then she was not guaranteed a good life. And despite how inflammatory he knew he had been he still had to ask, “Would you take her as your second?”

“Can I even say that I have a first?”

“Please?”

Prince Taichi looked uncomfortable and rubbed at the back of his neck with the corners of his mouth turned down. “I only ever intended to take one.”

“So you won’t?”

“I’m sorry.”

Prince Taichi said that he was sorry many more times that week and spent much more time with Katsumichi, asking to hold his hand and reading from his books and saying he thought Katsumichi might like it, and suggesting they go on walks around the grounds. There wasn’t much reason to refuse considering Yukie, Kaori and Eri were all busy with the preparations for Runa’s arrival and there wasn’t much else to do.

“You could look happier about being with me,” Prince Taichi said on the evening before Runa’s arrival as they walked along the bank of the West River. Katsumichi stopped walking and frowned, just to show what his unhappy face actually looked like.

“I could say the same of you. I doubt you could look any more exasperated than you currently do.”

“I’m just a bit nervous. Do you think she will like me?”

“Shouldn’t you be worrying about whether or not I like you first?” Katsumichi asked.

“ _Do_ you like me?”

It wasn’t a question that Katsumichi knew the answer to. He didn’t dislike Prince Taichi but he would like him a lot better if he were more consistent. If Prince Taichi didn’t only spend time with him to keep up appearances, if he didn’t keep going on about wanting to fall in love and abandoning Katsumichi immediately after saying such a thing, then maybe Katsumichi would be able to definitively say. As it was, he kept his mouth shut about that, didn’t even ask whether Prince Taichi liked him.

“My sister is a bit shy but she is known for her beauty. She probably won’t speak to you very much outside of social formalities.”

“I see,” Prince Taichi said, resuming his stride once more. “And when can I expect her to berate me at every opportunity?”

“Considering you are constantly asking for it, I would imagine you could expect it immediately.”

Prince Taichi grinned. He held out his hand. Katsumichi scoffed but he linked their hands, noted the dry warmth of the palm he had been offered. The practice had done them some good, he supposed, and he would be able to face his sister unafraid that she would see through the pretence of the marriage. Of course he had always considered it to be a move to secure relations between the two kingdoms but there was always a chance that marriage meant something different to her – that Runa had romantic visions of such a relationship.

“I have enjoyed this week more than I could have imagined.”

“Is now the time when you tell me that my sister coming to visit us was a lie to get me to act out whatever fantasies you have been dreaming of for the past decade?”

Prince Taichi brought his face close to Katsumichi’s, his mouth only a centimetre away from Katsumichi’s ear. “We haven’t come close to acting out one of my fantasies.”

Aside from a flush that could be attributed to the warm filter of the setting sun, Prince Taichi looked as though he had said something far tamer. The heat in Katsumichi’s face was far deeper. He supposed the other prince must have been talking about sex – fantasising about having sex with him – and it was a useless thing to think of. Yet Katsumichi could not help but wonder what Prince Taichi’s mind had come up with.

 

The next day, when Runa arrived, Katsumichi was exhausted. He hadn’t slept much the night before and his eyes still felt dry when he spoke with Yukie at breakfast and he nearly died as he bathed that morning when Yukie decided he was drifting too close to sleep and submerged him in the water without warning. But near-death experiences aside, he was excited.

He waited in the main courtyard all morning and refused to break his anticipation for lunch. Prince Taichi was markedly less excited to see Runa, but that was surely only because he didn’t know her. Still, after he had eaten at noon he came to the courtyard to sit with Katsumichi while he waited.

“Tonight, when Princess Runa has settled, perhaps we could go for a walk in the mountains on the other side of the river,” Prince Taichi suggested as he turned a stone over in the palms of his hands.

“Would Runa want to do such a thing after travelling all day?”

“I just meant the two of us,” Prince Taichi said.

“What is wrong with the mountains on this side of the river?” Katsumichi asked with narrow eyes. “Unless you plan to murder me and leave my body to the mercy of boars.”

Prince Taichi glanced at him without the usual sparkle of humour in his eyes. He said, “It would be nice for the two of us to spend time privately from time to time.”

“We have done that all week.”

“That much is true, but our lives extend further than this week.”

Katsumichi hummed non-committally. He was not about to admit that some hours of the night had been stifling with the possibility of what Prince Taichi’s fantasies could possibly be. He had been curious enough about it that he had pleasured himself, biting at the back of his wrist as he did so to muffle the sounds of his ragged breathing, though the harshness only sliced more loudly against his ear drums.

Prince Taichi passed over the stone that had been warmed by his hands, but when Katsumichi closed his fingers around it his wrist was restrained by the other prince. Katsumichi blushed as Prince Taichi pressed at the bruise on the back of his wrist. It would fade within a few days but the dull fuchsia of the mark was evidence that Prince Taichi was getting under his skin. It was evidence that Katsumichi wished to will from existence.

“What is this?” Prince Taichi murmured, his thumbs going white around the edges as he exerted more pressure.

Katsumichi didn’t even need to say that it was nothing as the gates to their home were opening and there was a bustle of activity as the gates swung wide and horses pulled a carriage through to the courtyard. He leapt to his feet and waited for the carriage to be opened and for his sister to be assisted from the vehicle.

She looked tired herself, nervous probably, but she approached the two princes with a gracious smile and a bow. “Prince Katsumichi, Fifth Child and Fourth Prince of Johzenji, and his spouse Prince Taichi, Twelfth Child and Seventh Prince of Shiratorizawa, I, Princess Runa, Ninth Child and Second Princess of Johzenji greet you respectfully and thank you for allowing me to receive tuition in the Kingdom of Shiratorizawa.”

“Princess Runa, Ninth Child and Second Princess of Johzenji, welcome to the West River estate,” Katsumichi said with as much control as he could before launching himself at her.

Runa squealed but she wrapped her arms around Katsumichi tightly enough that he was sure she was about to crack one of his ribs. Even while exerting that strength she was able to lean around Katsumichi’s body to say, “It is nice to meet you, Prince Taichi. Thank you for taking care of my brother.”

 

That evening, Katsumichi did end up going on a mountain walk on the other side of the river. He had been wrong though, Runa was apparently not too tired to accompany Katsumichi and Prince Taichi and he could not help but notice the flat signs of displeasure at that.

Katsumichi couldn’t say that he minded all that much. When Arata had arrived the week before, he hadn’t spent as much time with him as he liked and, though Runa’s stay was indefinite, he didn’t want to waste any more time. He looped his arm around hers as they strolled through the less densely wooded areas of the mountain. He didn’t bother glancing over his shoulder at Prince Taichi beyond the first time because he looked blankly discontent with the situation.

“Did you want to come here?” Katsumichi asked. Runa wrinkled her nose and slowed her pace some as she thought.

“I always want to see you, Prince Katsumichi.”

“Me too, but to think that Crown Prince Yuuji would have agreed to let you come here.”

Runa’s face hardened and she tilted her head in Prince Taichi’s direction just enough for Katsumichi to realise his mistake. Her voice was louder than it had been for the rest of the walk when she replied, “Crown Prince Yuuji’s wishes are second to those of The King. He was sad to part with me and I hope he is fine with the decision by now seeing as we are together now. After you left, he disappeared for some time.”

“What do you mean?”

“I think he feels responsible. You are only the second of our family to marry and the first of our blood. After you left, I didn’t see him until our uncle had returned with the confirmation of your marriage into Shiratorizawa.”

“Oh,” Katsumichi said quietly because he couldn’t manage much else.

Officially, the king of Johzenji was as exuberant as ever though he no longer led hunts and rides through the mountains, nor did he hold feasts and festivals as often as he had before. Crown Prince Yuuji had taken on as many of the King’s duties as he could without drawing too much suspicion but his smiles had grown more strained and he was less likely to play with the rest of his siblings.

Once, Crown Prince Yuuji had confessed to Katsumichi that he was too young. He hadn’t yet turned twenty-five, yet he was overseeing most of the matters of the kingdom while sitting with their father who recognised his children less and less as the days went on. Katsumichi thought he had been helpful, urging his brother to accept the offer from Shiratorizawa for a marriage. It was beneficial for their protection and Crown Prince Yuuji had initially written a letter to reject the offer, but the two of them had fought because Katsumichi had accused him of being foolish.

He had ended up the one feeling foolish in the end and he wondered how soon the rest of their siblings would see him after Runa’s departure. She was the youngest and the Crown Prince had always called her the most precious. Katsumichi tightened the loop of his arm around hers.

“He must have thought you were lonely when he decided to send me here,” Runa said, patting his hand softly.

“You know that is probably not all.”

“He said he was sorry he fought with you. That might only have been because uncle gave him a dressing down in front of the rest of our brothers and their mothers. I hadn’t seen him look that ashamed since I was seven and mother scolded him for breaking your leg.” Runa giggled quietly into her hand but Katsumichi didn’t feel much like laughing. Runa’s face turned softer. “I can only hope he can say the same of me, even if he is forced to.”

Katsumichi stopped and he was glad at the harshness of Runa’s surprise, that she had tried to keep walking without realising that he had stopped. Feeling the shape of her arm through her layers felt more real than anything from the past few weeks, even if the red _kake obi_ pulled taut and rolled up around her shoulders. She took a small step backwards. Some paces behind, Prince Taichi also stopped.

“Did Crown Prince Yuuji quarrel with you?” She looked straight ahead down the path and Katsumichi placed his palm over the outline of her jaw, feeling through the _Uchiki_ that was hooded over her head, and turned her face to him. “Runa?”

“I wouldn’t call it a quarrel,” She said, she lowered her voice further, a rapid flicker of her pupils in the direction of Prince Taichi. “He just said something that hurt me. It is nothing.”

“Runa, he loves you. He probably didn’t mean it.”

She looked up, a shine of something passed over her face, and she said, “I worried about the meaning of his words, but in all honesty, I wonder whether he meant to advise me.”

She smiled tightly and swept her arm in a gesture towards the path. Katsumichi shook his head. “Perhaps we should all head back to the house. It is late and we would all benefit from a good rest.”

Prince Taichi was oddly quiet and complicit as he followed them back along the path they had taken through the forest on the mountain. Once they reached the West River he was his usual self as he bid Runa goodnight, but Katsumichi suspected that something was amiss when he was asked to attend to the other prince’s study.

“I’m glad you could come to see me,” Prince Taichi said, sitting in wait. He paused until Katsumichi sat in front of him. “I have a matter to discuss with you.”

“We were together not twenty minutes ago. Why could we not have discussed it then?”

“I thought it best that we discuss this without our guest.”

“Why?”

“I received a letter earlier this week. It is regarding Second Prince Wakatoshi’s birthday which is being celebrated in three days’ time. An invitation has been extended to the entirety of our household here at the West River.”

“Including my sister,” Katsumichi said slowly. Prince Taichi nodded.

That news more or less confirmed Katsumichi’s fears. He hadn’t expected things to happen so soon, before she had even had time to sleep in her new bedroom, or eat a meal at her new home. Most, if not all of the brothers, would be present for the birthday celebration so it could be any of the children of Shiratorizawa who had been suggested to take Runa as a wife.

“Are you sure you couldn’t marry her?” Katsumichi asked, barely above a whisper. He already knew the answer – he had heard it last week – before the corners of Prince Taichi’s mouth turned down and the line of his shoulders sagged.  

“Prince Katsumichi, I want to do anything I can to make you happy. I want you to look at me because I am trying to look at you,” Prince Taichi said in a voice that sounded more disappointed than Katsumichi expected. “But this is something I cannot do. I know that I risk making you hate me, but I will not marry Princess Runa.”

“I know.”

“It is natural to be worried, but surely it can only further strengthen the bond between our two kingdoms.”

Katsumichi shook his head. “I don’t think that I can let her do that. She shouldn’t have to marry for a reason like that.”

Prince Taichi slouched and pressed his fingers to his temples. “And you should?”

“I must do whatever I can to aid my brother… and my kingdom. But Runa is different. She is accomplished with strategy and the sword and was likely to take charge of her own military unit soon. Surely it would have been better for her to remain in Johzenji.”

Prince Taichi was staring hard, and Katsumichi touched his face to make sure there were no marks on his skin. There was no ink or dirt on his fingers when he withdrew them but he was still being stared at. He tried not to squirm too visibly as it would be unbecoming but the pair of them had gone a long time without saying anything. He swallowed and wondered whether he had said too much. Perhaps he had, as Prince Taichi’s next words were unexpected.

“You can’t fight?”

“I can,” Katsumichi protested. He felt his skin grow warmer from the irritating whine in his voice. This was no place to act that way. “Just, not well.”

“Should we spar tomorrow?”

“Maybe. You’re probably not that good either.”

Prince Taichi grinned behind his hand and sat up straighter. When he dropped his hand his lips were pressed against the remnants of his smile. And then he scurried forwards on his hands and knees until he had caged Katsumichi inside his grasp. Katsumichi leaned backwards, just to put some space between their faces, but Prince Taichi only moved closer.

Katsumichi toppled backwards and Prince Taichi was above him. If he bent his elbows it would only be an inch or so to connect their mouths. That was surely all it would take for Prince Taichi to ignore him for another week.  The pattern was yet to be broken.

“You might be right about that.”

“What would you do if I beat you?”

He expected some disbelief or a casual brag of some sort. He did not expect their proximity to increase, nor did he expect the warmth of the voice in his ear; “I would do whatever you wanted me to do.”

Katsumichi turned his face, just enough. Prince Taichi gasped but before he could pull away from the soft slide of their mouths, Katsumichi slung his arms around his neck. He was embarrassingly uncertain about the whole thing – whether or not this would turn out to be a terrible idea – but it was too late to regret his actions now. Slowly, lightly, he parted his lips and sucked gently at Prince Taichi’s lower lip and released it again when he felt hands either side of his face. The tongue that slipped alongside his own was firm and the sensation of something moving with such surety as it traced the roof of his mouth almost had him biting off the other prince’s tongue. He wrenched his face away, the saliva on his lips cooling quickly. He might have been wrong about Prince Taichi after all. It wouldn’t make sense for the other prince to be a complete novice if there wasn’t a timid tinge to any part of the kiss.

The ceiling above them seemed to move, the geometric uniform of it drifted as carelessly as clouds as Katsumichi drew his eyes to Prince Taichi’s face.

“Can we… tonight. I would like to consummate our marriage.”

“If we did that, I have no doubt that you would avoid me for at least a year,” Katsumichi retorted on a breath. Prince Taichi looked confused at that, as though he had any right to be. Katsumichi ensured his next words were slow and purposeful, just in case his meaning was misconstrued. “Poor Eri was tasked with explaining to me, in great detail, what such a thing would entail. If kissing makes you avoid me for a week, then doing that would surely exile me from your side for far longer.”

Prince Taichi sat up and Katsumichi suddenly felt that there was too much space above him. It would be harder to say anything when he had the infinity of the low-ceilinged room stretching beyond his vision in every direction.

“If I promised to remain by your side, no matter how bashful I felt, would you agree to it?”

“No,” Katsumichi said quietly. He simply did not want to and he didn’t know why. It wasn’t anything that he hadn’t done before yet he felt nervous about doing anything of the sort with Prince Taichi. It was not as though it would change much aside from the validity of the marriage. Even then, they had falsely confirmed the consummation already to both of their kingdoms. Katsumichi was just selfishly being leisurely about it. But the sense that this was not the right time didn’t feel particularly leisurely. He swallowed hard.  “Give me more time,” He said.

Prince Taichi sighed. It was no wonder he barely seemed happy if he was constantly expelling his fragments of contentment before they could connect to take shape as true happiness. He stood and held out his hand for Katsumichi to take. After Katsumichi was up, he maintained the link of their hands and his thumb stroked at the back of Katsumichi’s hand. Finally, he said, “Good night, Prince Katsumichi.”


	6. Celebration

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Following Princess Runa's arrival the West River household are extended an invitation to celebrate the day of Prince Wakatoshi's birth.

For the days leading to Second Prince Wakatoshi’s birthday, Prince Taichi was surprisingly present. He was at Katsumichi’s side for the majority of the day, only taking his leave to give Katsumichi and Runa some privacy as they hiked through the mountains around the West River with Yukie grumbling all the while. Prince Taichi was notably absent on the morning of the Second Prince’s birthday as preparations were being made to journey back to the main palace.

“Have you seen Prince Taichi?” Katsumichi asked Kaori. She spared the smallest glance at him as she carefully folded stacks of silk into a trunk.

“Isn’t he your spouse?” She said shortly.

Well, that was odd. Katsumichi wasn’t sure whether he was simply being sensitive or if Kaori truly had the nerve to speak down to him. It was different when he had been new and confused and she was helping him to relax but her words had never come as close to a bite as these. Katsumichi frowned against the mist of unease and decided to act with caution.

“I hope that if you see him you tell him that I am looking for him.”

“I can tell you now that you will not find him in your sister’s room,” Kaori huffed.

Katsumichi nodded and left Runa’s room. He knew that Yukie was with Runa as she was being folded and draped in layers and layers of silk in the room adjacent to where Kaori was packing clothes – he had already asked the two of them and narrowly avoided being hit in the face by a bundle of cotton for his trouble.

He really had no reason to be so worried about Prince Taichi’s whereabouts. There were more places than his room and his study and the main hall, but the forest around West River was too large an area for Katsumichi to consider searching on a morning like this. The carriages had already been prepared and the horses and the guards were standing ready at the gates and around the carriages. Where the horses were tossing their manes back.

The guards were just as clueless about – or unwilling to reveal – Prince Taichi’s location. He was close to his wit’s end when the gates to the courtyard opened and Prince Taichi rode in on a horse, looking for all the world as though he was bored with the state of events. He stopped in front of Katsumichi and swung his leg over to jump from the horse.

“Where have you been?”

“I was in search of a treasure that can only be found here at the West River,” Prince Taichi said.

“What treasure?” Katsumichi asked with narrowed eyes. Prince Taichi quickly dipped his head down to peck at Katsumichi’s lips and when he pulled away, as quickly as he had started, he looked as though it had never happened in the first place. His eyes dropped to Katsumichi’s hands and he reached out to hold the one on the left.

“You’re hurt again,” Prince Taichi muttered. “What is this?”

Katsumichi snatched his hand back and hid it behind his back. He had been caught out again, whether Prince Taichi realised it or not. He attempted a smile. “It’s nothing. What is the treasure?”

“We should leave soon. Is Princess Runa ready?”

They did not have to wait to long for Runa’s arrival, walking with painstakingly slow steps as she approached, red in the face but enduring the weight of the dozens of layers of silk she was wearing. Yukie was following behind and struggling to contain a laugh at the laborious pace. It took even longer for Runa to stuff herself into her own carriage and Yukie sighed at her tiredly.

“Princess Runa, will you be alright without me?”

“I’m a grown woman, Yukie, I know how to care for _karaginu mo_ ,” Runa grumbled as she folded her arms across her chest with some difficulty. “Close the door!”

“As you wish, _Denka,_ ” Yukie said with a low bow that was very obviously sarcastic. Runa stuck her tongue out just as the carriage was closed. “I can’t wait to be rid of the lot of you, go on, you two get into your carriage too.”

Yukie pushed at Katsumichi’s shoulders and, like his sister, he stuck his tongue out at the servant before he climbed into the other carriage. Prince Taichi climbed in behind him and the door closed them both inside.

The pair of them hadn’t been in a space this small since they first came to live at West River. Maybe it was because Katsumichi wasn’t pushed right into the corner of the carriage, creating as much space as possible between the two of them, that the space seemed wider. They didn’t have to endure the same amount of bulk as Runa had to but the _karaginu_ over their _hakama_ were enough to make them seem more connected. It was less that he was restricted in the space than he was constantly near Prince Taichi.

“Do you think Princess Runa feels lonely?” Prince Taichi asked quietly.

It wasn’t a question that Katsumichi could really answer. He loved his sister and he knew her as well as he could but there were always parts of her that had been hidden. For the time she had been trying to acclimatise to West River, Katsumichi could tell that she was not being forthcoming with how she felt. Whenever she was asked how she was, she would smile in the way she had been trained to since childhood and any doubts about her mood would wither in the speaker’s mouth. The roots still lived in Katsumichi’s mind.

She must have been extremely lonely, knowing that she was here in Shiratorizawa to marry. But it would take a lot for her to be honest about that.

Katsumichi tilted his head and righted the tall _ebisu_ on his head as he felt it shift with the movement. “She might be,” he said, revealing more than he had hoped to.

“Hopefully she will be able to enjoy her time at the main palace, regardless of the reasons she is in Shiratorizawa.”

 

Runa’s carriage arrived at the main palace before Katsumichi and Prince Taichi’s. When they climbed out of the vehicle, they found her standing stiffly in the courtyard, peering over the top of her fan as she spoke with Lady Yue.

Lady Yue was taller than Runa though her stuffed and bejewelled up-do exaggerated the effect. She looks glad as she chatted away despite Runa’s eyes shifting about and more reserved responses.

“ _Haha-ue_ , it is good to see you again.”

Lady Yue smiled widely and embraced her son tightly. Before long he was pushed aside for her to do the same to Katsumichi. She pulled away just enough to hold his face in her hands and her eyes crinkled at the edges as she regarded him warmly. “You and Princess Runa must be exhausted from travelling.”

“What about me?” Prince Taichi grumbled behind her.

“I’m sure you’re fine, dearest son. Whether you are tired or not, we should care for our guests first.”

“I don’t live here anymore,” Prince Taichi said slowly. “I’m a guest too.”

Lady Yue turned to Prince Taichi crossly and said, “I know that. But you won’t do me the service of coming to visit me from time to time.”

“You are more than welcome to come and live at the West River. In fact, I offered you a room before. I’m not going to come to see you every day when it takes me at least an hour to get here from my home, which is in the middle of nowhere might I add.” Prince Taichi folded his arms and looked to be pouting, an expression his mother appeared to be mirroring.

“Why would I move in with a newly married couple? I wouldn’t leave the man I love to go to a place where I would not even be noticed.”

“I apologise, Lady Yue, for our household not allocating enough time to pay you the due respect. I fear as we age it becomes harder and harder for us to meet with the family that we love. In future we will endeavour to be more filial,” Katsumichi said with a solemn bow. He didn’t rise until he was certain that the significant looks he was throwing from the corner of his eye was reaching Prince Taichi who eventually bowed to his mother.

Lady Yue cooed and pulled Katsumichi into her arms once more. “What a pure-hearted boy!”

The compliments did not stop coming as Lady Yue escorted them all to where the rest of the Shiratorizawa royal family had gathered to celebrate Prince Wakatoshi’s birthday. It had been a very warm summer so that probably influenced the decision to dine outdoors. A large tent had been set up on one of the sprawling lawns. They were far away enough from the flowering shrubs and bushes that insects would not get to close to their meals.

There were two tables set up beneath the tent. One short table on a raised platform with the king’s seat in in the middle and most of his wives seated on the floor either side of him. Bisecting that table lower than the platform was a long table where the children of Shiratorizawa, and Lady Mai were seated on the wooden floor of the tent.

Lady Yue led the greetings though the king’s face did not move as he watched his concubine, his son, and his in-laws all introduce themselves. One of the King’s wives introduced herself as Queen Fumie. She was sitting stiffly as not to disturb her hair which was impossibly grander than Lady Yue’s hair with many more ornaments of amethyst and silver which dangled and twinkled even underneath the tent.

“Lady Yue, we are very glad to have met your family. Prince Wakatoshi?”

“It is an honour to have you all attend the celebration of my day of birth,” Prince Wakatoshi said as he stood and bowed to them. “Please, sit.”

Runa’s fan was in front of her face with some determination as they all sat at the end of the table furthest from the king. Prince Wakatoshi glanced down the table and offered a blank expression that revealed less than he probably thought that it would. Prince Taichi was just as often guilty of that too and the lack of expression may have just run in the family but when the king looked down at them with that strange lack of expression it was a lot more unsettling.

At their end of the table sat a fidgety young man who kept blinking and averting his eyes from Runa who had sat opposite him. The woman who was seated next to him, opposite Katsumichi, looked to be resisting the urge to crane her neck to look between the man and Runa. Her hairstyle was more modest than most of the women sitting around the tables, though unlike Runa whose hair was draped straight down her back, her hair was still pinned up and away from the green outer layer of her _juunihitoe_.

“My name is Lady Hau, mother of Thirteenth Child and Eighth Prince of Shiratorizawa, Prince Tsutomu,” The woman said kindly. She very subtly jabbed her elbow into the young man’s side and gestured for him to add to the introduction.

“Prince Tsutomu, Thirteenth Child and Eighth Prince of Shiratorizawa. It is nice to meet the Seventh Prince’s spouse and another child of Johzenji,” He said loudly enough to draw the attention of a few of the others at the table.

“I apologise for my son, he is probably nervous for some reason,” Lady Hau said with a smile that was indicative of something obvious.

“ _Haha-ue_!” Prince Tsutomu exclaimed, turning away from her with ruddy cheeks. Lady Hau smiled at Lady Yue and Katsumichi heard Prince Taichi say something that could have been in reference to that but he was more interested in the crease between Runa’s eyebrows.

“Are you alright?” He asked her. She nodded, barely detectable behind her fan.

“There are just a lot of people here.” Runa was not wrong, but surely she was used to things like this. Or perhaps not. Katsumichi could not say that he had often interacted with people outside of his immediate family while he lived at Johzenji. There were even fewer people at the West River estate to mingle with and as he thought about it, speaking and playing with his family was different to meeting a stranger who was a royal from a different family.

They ate slowly and there was some quiet chatter around the table. Katsumichi didn’t know what to make of Lady Hau, though he still wasn’t sure what to make of Lady Yue who was likely over compensating for their first meeting.

After the food, it was time to present the gifts to Prince Wakatoshi. He received poems, a _kemari_ ball, horses, a sword, foreign artefacts that Katsumichi could make head nor tail of – though he could assume a good quantity of them were musical instruments, and a lantern. The lantern was the gift from Prince Taichi, clay growing upwards in thick vines that twisted away from each other after each stem met to kiss and it would meet with another and twist away from that one too. There were several of these lanterns around the West River estate and it seemed like such a mundane gift. Prince Wakatoshi accepted it with the same grace that he had accepted the deer-hide ball that Prince Tsutomu had given him. With a face as habitually expressionless as those found in Shiratorizawa, Katsumichi could pretend that Prince Wakatoshi thought of the ball and the lantern in the same way he thought of the musical instruments gifted to him by Prince Hayato.

Prince Hayato, as far as Katsumichi could understand, was ranked last out of all of the children of Shiratorizawa despite being born earlier than at least five of his siblings. It seemed that his mother was not even a concubine, but a child of a foreign family on the continent who had sent his mother to the relatively small kingdom of Shiratorizawa where she bore the king’s child. Prince Hayato was taken in to the royal family of Shiratorizawa to live as a prince but was often tasked with surveying the political climate on the continent.

He didn’t appear to bother much with many of his brothers and Katsumichi wondered whether that went both ways. He didn’t offer much of a greeting to Katsumichi or Runa and though he was partially irritated that the man didn’t care much for formalities, he was relieved. If Runa had to marry someone here it would be a prince who had more of a social standing than Prince Hayato, and he might even have been a polite prince.

That being said, none of the Shiratorizawa princes were all that appealing. The most polite of them would probably have been Prince Reon, though Katsumichi was certain that was mostly due to Lady Mai’s elbow lodged in his ribs.

Prince Tsutomu looked restless as he craned his neck to look at the top of the table where Prince Wakatoshi was frowning down to the poem that Prince Satori had given him. The handwriting was very unclear and many of the characters were ambiguous on the page and Katsumichi wasn’t certain that Prince Satori had been telling the truth when he read out the poem in front of all of the guests. Katsumichi would have to be patient and hope that at some point he would be able to read the poem for himself and parse the meaning behind it.

As it was, he was trying to parse the meaning behind Prince Tsutomu’s behaviour. He leaned slightly closer to Prince Taichi and muttered, “Is Prince Tsutomu alright?”

Prince Taichi wrinkled his nose at the tea that had been poured for him and glanced across the table at his brother. “I suppose he is always like that.”

“Really?”

“Well he is always looking to see if Prince Wakatoshi is about to acknowledging him,” He sniffed the drink in his small cup and offered it to Katsumichi. “Does this taste right to you?”

Katsumichi leaned forwards and sniffed lightly before he took a sip. The aroma of the tea was not unusual – perhaps a bit plain for Katsumichi’s tastes, but all of the tea in Shiratorizawa smelled the same way – but there was something marginally unhappy in Prince Taichi’s expression so he parted his lips.

“You’re really going to do it? You’re going to drink from who the same cup?” Prince Tsutomu exclaimed, eyes wide and cheeks even redder than they had been all day.

Katsumichi straightened up and wondered whether it was really such a bad thing to do. It was – and Katsumichi had been forgetting himself after spending so much time with Prince Taichi. Looking around at the nearby faces, they knew well that it was unbecoming to do something so intimate in public, though Katsumichi wasn’t sure how he could have forgotten such a thing himself. His whole life he had been brought up to know how to act with grace and decorum, yet his time with Prince Taichi, practicing the appearance of love, had made him pay no mind to something as innocent as sharing a cup to taste.

“Tsutomu, don’t be so rude,” Lady Hau hissed.

“They’re the ones being rude,” He insisted petulantly. “Practically _kissing_ in public! Like they’re _commoners_!”

“Prince Tsutomu, I do apologise for our behaviour,” Katsumichi said quickly. A quick glance to Prince Taichi revealed a determinedly unapologetic visage and Katsumichi had to ignore that as he offered his penitent expression. “We will not exhibit such crassness in future.”

“See to it that you don’t,” Prince Tsutomu grumbled to his lap.

Prince Taichi put his cup down loudly and sighed. “Well I’m not going to drink any more without a second opinion.”

“I didn’t realise anybody had offered a first opinion,” Katsumichi said quietly enough that only Prince Taichi and Runa could hear. Prince Taichi furrowed his brows and pointed towards himself.

“You’d have to listen to me to realise whether or not I had an opinion.”

“I am always listening to you, D _enka_.”

“Are the two of you alright?” Lady Yue asked, her hair jingled as she looked between the two of them.

“Yes, _Haha-ue,”_ Prince Taichi said. He cleared his throat and added, “We were just having a private conversation.”

“And now they are muttering under their breaths to talk despite the presence of all of these other people,” Prince Tsutomu said, simmering with his outrage. “How must poor Princess Runa of Johzenji feel if she is being excluded like this? Surely they could endeavour to at least include her in the conversation.”

“Prince Tsutomu, I can assure you that I am quite alright without being included in the conversations of my brother and his spouse,” Runa said from behind her fan. The brightness she had injected into her voice must have cost her a lot as pink spread up to her hairline.

Prince Tsutomu spluttered uselessly for a moment, looking at his mother as though he wanted to ask for her assistance but Lady Hau was not forthcoming with aid. Eventually he stood from the table. “King of the Fearsome Kingdom of Shiratorizawa, Prince Tsutomu the Thirteenth Child and Eighth Prince of Shiratorizawa wishes to be excused temporarily from the celebrations for Second Prince Wakatoshi’s day of birth.”

The King stared down at Prince Tsutomu, measuring with hawk-like accuracy and Katsumichi wondered what it was he saw. It was impressive that Prince Tsutomu was able to withstand such scrutiny without further flushing as he stood. Eventually he nodded, just the merest drop of his chin, though as soon as the relief relaxed the line of Prince Tsutomu, he said, “Should you not be as courteous as to ask The Second Prince yourself?”

“Oh,” Prince Tsutomu said dumbly. He looked around, clearly aware that all eyes were on him where he stood. “May I be excused, _aniue_?”

“Of course,” Prince Wakatoshi said. “I hope you will soon be able to re-join us.”

After he was excused, prince Tsutomu did not return to the celebrations. There was a _Gagaku_ performance by some of the court ladies playing _biwa_ while Prince Wakatoshi watched every flutter of fingertips and the king closed his eyes and swayed in gradual increments with the pentatonic plucking. There was more _sake_ served to them all and the heat of the afternoon, and Runa’s increasingly strengthening glow, simmered on.

There was a short game of _kemari_ , a demonstration of Prince Tsutomu’s gift to Prince Wakatoshi, though the person to give the gift was still absent. Katsumichi decided it was better to sit with Runa than play. It was just a matter of kicking the ball into the air and keeping it in play, but Katsumichi was hesitant to get involved. He didn’t know any of the Shiratorizawa princes and it seemed better to let the siblings play alone.

Katsumichi had to pretend not to be surprised that Prince Taichi also sat out of the game. He was sitting close to Katsumichi at the edge of the paved area where the game was held.

“Aren’t you going to join in?”

“No, I’m fine here,” Prince Taichi said.

Katsumichi could not think of anything to say in response to that. He nodded to Lady Mai as she sat on the other side of Runa to watch the game more closely.

The ball was a perfect gift for Prince Wakatoshi who watched patiently for the first few passes of the ball before jumping into the fray and passing it to his brothers. Prince Hayato made some flashy plays, able to lunge far from his original position to kick it back towards one of the others. Lady Mai made a show of clapping politely but would become much more animated in her cheering when Prince Reon kicked the ball.

Katsumichi wasn’t sure he would be able to do the same if Prince Taichi had played. Luckily he wasn’t playing and was sitting beside Katsumichi without paying much attention to the game.

“Is everything okay?” Katsumichi asked in a low voice.

“Yes. Why wouldn’t I be?”

“I don’t know. You just seem… odd? You didn’t even want to play _kemari_?”

“Didn’t you?”

Katsumichi sighed. There was no point in bothering if all of his answers were going to be like this. He turned to Runa who kept glancing over her shoulder. Lady Mai was watching from the corner of her eye but in the next instant Prince Reon must have done something impressive because she cheered loudly, attention back on the game.

Runa took the chance to look behind her again.

“What is the matter?” Katsumichi whispered.

Runa smiled stiffly and shook her head. “Nothing.”

“What do you keep looking at?” Runa poked Katsumichi in the side. It seemed she didn’t want him to look back but he did anyway.

Prince Tsutomu had returned. The tent set up for the meal was still occupied by the queens and most of the prince’s mothers, the King having retired earlier. Lady Hau was looking sadly at her son as he lingered by one of the pillars.

“What is he doing over there?”

“Why do you think Prince Tsutomu doesn’t want to play?” Runa asked.

“Maybe because he is a giant baby?” Prince Taichi offered lightly. Runa frowned at Katsumichi and he wondered whether that was simply because he was sitting between the two of them or if she wanted him to say something to Prince Taichi. Katsumichi was not in the habit of telling Prince Taichi off – not really, so he didn’t say anything to that.

When the princes decided the game was over, it was time to go home. The barest of farewells were offered to mostly everyone except for Lady Yue who insisted on embracing Katsumichi and Runa tightly.

She was a nice enough woman but Katsumichi could not help but wonder whether this was all to overcompensate for slapping him when they first met. He hated how he constantly thought that but hoped that regardless she was this nice all the time.

Once they parted, Lady Yue finally turned to her son, reaching up to pinch his cheeks. “Of course I can’t forget about you, can I?”

Prince Taichi didn’t say anything but there was something vaguely childish about his silence until Lady Yue wrapped her arms around him. “We should meet more often. I know it is I who declined to live with you, but I hope that won’t affect things. I love you dearly, Taichi.”

“I love you too,” was the petulantly grumbled reply.

Katsumichi quickly had to school his face into careful blankness, though Runa was having just as much trouble not smiling as he was.

“Stop laughing,” Prince Taichi muttered grumpily after parting with his mother.

“Of course, _Denka_ ,” Katsumichi agreed through a grin before following in the direction of their carriages.

 

There was an odd note in the air upon their return to the West River Estate. Yukie hardly listened when Katsumichi was telling her what happened. He had continued speaking despite his suspicions but it was difficult to ignore the fact when Yukie, pretending to be good at her job as she helped him to bathe by pouring water over him, tipped a dish of water directly into his eyes.

“Yukie!” He exclaimed.

“Whatever is the matter, _Denka_?” She asked without inflection. Katsumichi glared up at her from where he sat in the _ofuro_ but Yukie continued to stare down at him with dead eyes.

“Are you alright?”

“I’m tired,” Yukie mumbled.

“Have you not been sleeping well?”

“Prince Katsumichi, please understand that I will be tired until the day I die. While you live to rule, I live to serve you and ensure you live your life as comfortably as possible. People like me are not afforded such a luxury.”

“I’m sorry,” Katsumichi said quickly.

As awful as it sounded, he hated thinking about things like this. He was well aware that people in positions like Yukie’s were still living far better than some of the people of the land. He had heard of people struggling to fill their families’ bellies on the pittance of a living they could earn. But there wasn’t anything that he could do about that. In real terms he had no wealth. It was passed around by Crown Prince Yuuji – but officially their father, the King – and his uncle Anabara, and the heads of noble houses as they accepted rent and taxes and paid a wage to staff and contractors. And not much of it reached the people furthest removed from kings.

Even without gold having to exchange hands, Katsumichi got to live like this, easily, with servants and nothing much to worry about.

Yukie’s birth hadn’t been much different to his own, he supposed. He didn’t know all the particulars of living further South. But she had been born to a king and an unfavoured concubine and sent to live in a different kingdom. Katsumichi had no idea how the arrangement came to be between his kingdom and hers, nor did he quite understand why she was sent simply to be a servant. But years after she arrived, the First Child of Johzenji Princess Hana was sent off to marry the Crown Prince of Fukuroudani.

Somehow, Yukie was made to be tired for the rest of her life. And Katsumichi hated thinking about it. And she knew that, so she smiled at him, still tired, and said, “It’s not your fault.”


	7. Guests

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The West River Estate plays host to two more of Shiratorizawa's princes and a return visit is paid once more.

For the next few days, Katsumichi was seeing less and less of Yukie and more and more of Eri. She smiled brightly at him as she brought his lunch to him on a tray that rattled with her every step. He wasn’t doing much of anything by the river, just sitting and waiting, and he sort of wished he had returned to his room when his stomach decided to make its emptiness known.

The mealtimes at Johzenji had been slightly different yet he was already fully adjusted to the Shiratorizawa schedule. His taste buds had not yet adjusted to the Shiratorizawa flavours but he smiled back at Eri when she asked how the food was.

“Thank goodness,” She said, her voice high and young. She can’t have been much younger than him, yet she seemed so much more excited about everything. It must have been for his benefit, so that he didn’t feel bad about the differences in their stations, he supposed.

“Have you spoken with Yukie much?” He asked before resigning himself to the rather bland miso he had been putting off.

“Hm? We always speak with one another, _Denka_. We are all great friends here,” Eri said. Which was not an answer at all. He wondered belatedly whether the personality she showed him was kindness or condescension considering how bewildered he had been by everything when he first arrived in the kingdom.

“What sort of things have you spoken about lately?”

Eri’s smile didn’t flicker. “I wouldn’t think the idle chatter of servants would be of much interest to a prince.”

“I suppose you’re right.”

Eri nodded, still smiling widely, and that was the end of that conversation. It was harder to pretend he was fully enjoying the meal when he couldn’t attempt to distract himself with trying to talk to Eri. Mealtimes were easier with Yukie because she would steal mouthfuls of his food and make fun of the faces he made as he got closer and closer to sulking about how the food really didn’t taste of much. 

When Katsumichi finally finished eating, Eri lifted the tray and made to leave. She stopped a few steps away and turned back to him. “Ah, _Denka_ , tomorrow we will be receiving some guests. I do hope that you will be able to entertain them.”

“Who is it?”

“Prince Taichi never told me that,” She said lightly before bowing and walking away, the tray clicking and clacking as she went.

Katsumichi waited until he could no longer hear a trace of Eri. Then he waited a bit longer just to be sure. He was definitely alone and Eri should have had enough of a head-start to get back to the kitchens without encountering him for yet another awkward conversation. He stood quickly, dusted off the light silk of his _karaginu_ , and strode back to see Prince Taichi.

The first, most obvious place to check was the study, and there Prince Taichi was, staring down at a sheet of paper. He hadn’t reacted to Katsumichi’s entrance, not the request to enter, nor the sliding open of the _fusuma._

That was fine. Katsumichi removed his _geta_ and walked purposefully towards Prince Taichi.

“You left the door open,” Prince Taichi said, still staring down at the paper on the low table he was kneeling behind.

“I did,” Katsumichi confirmed. It had been an accident but it would undermine his cause if he went back to close it now. “Who is coming tomorrow?”

Prince Taichi finally lifted his face and smiled. It was one of the smiles Katsumichi hated, the ones that appeared to goad him.

“Why do I get no correspondence? Everything is always addressed to you.”

“If your family do not care enough to write to you, that is none of my business,” Prince Taichi said as though it should be obvious. It was obvious. But it was not believable.

“Before Runa came, you received a letter from the main palace. Here in Shiratorizawa. I received nothing. Do you not find it odd that nobody wrote to inform me of it? And before you ask I am on excellent terms with every member of my family.”

Prince Taichi sighed and nodded, avoiding Katsumichi’s gaze for a beat too long. “I did think it was odd. I did just assume you had a falling out or something similar. This whole situation seemed odd to me; the brother of a crown prince coming here to marry the least ambitious child of Shiratorizawa.”

Katsumichi kneeled so they were at least eye-level.  “Tell me what you think, then.”

“To be honest, I really do think that your family simply aren’t writing to you.”

After making it sound so suspicious himself, it was odd that Prince Taichi was amounting it all to that. To Katsumichi really not being considered by his family members. Katsumichi narrowed his eyes. “Why do you think that?”

“A few days ago, Princess Runa received a letter.”

“What? Who was it from?” Katsumichi asked.

Prince Taichi’s lip curled, almost shyly. “I can’t say.”

“Well you must have read it. For security purposes or something. Tell me about the letter,” Katsumichi said.

Prince Taichi brought his hand to his mouth but his smile was still clear as he said, “Why can’t you just ask Princess Runa what it says herself? I thought you were on excellent terms with your family.”

“I am,” Katsumichi said. “But that is because I don’t butt into other people’s business. Tell me, please? I will ask her what it say anyway but so even if you tell me I can confirm it with her. But what if she doesn’t tell me? I can’t force her to tell me a secret.”

“But you can force me?”

“We’re married. That means I am allowed, so you have to tell me,” Katsumichi pleaded. He reached across the desk between them for the hand at Prince Taichi’s face. His hand came away from his face easily and Katsumichi held it between both of his own, swaying it to and fro lightly.

“Okay,” Prince Taichi grinned. He pushed the sheet of paper he had been staring at towards Katsumichi. He turned the page around so it was the right way up for Katsumichi.

“What is this?”

“Read it,” Prince Taichi said. He tugged his hand free gently and Katsumichi lifted the paper to read it.

 

_Dear Princess Runa_

_It was wonderful to meet you on the day of celebration of the Second child of Shiratorizawa, Second Prince Wakatoshi’s day of birth. You must be the most radiant child of Johzenji and to know of you is more than all of my most magnificent dreams. I would like to know you better._

_I read a poem not long ago. It reminded me of you. I have painstakingly scribed it here for your pleasure._

_I hope my feelings reach you._

_Lying all alone,_

_Through the hours of the night,_

_Till the daylight comes;_

_Can you realise at all_

_The emptiness of that night?_

_All my love,_

_Thirteenth Child, Eighth Prince of the Fearsome Kingdom of Shiratorizawa, Prince Tsutomu_

 

Katsumichi read the letter again to be sure.

“You told me to ask Runa myself but you’ve still got the letter here,” Katsumichi accused, pointing at Prince Taichi.

“No,” He denied quickly. “Runa has the original. I had to make a copy for myself. For prosperity.”

“Are you planning on extorting somebody with… this?” Katsumichi said. He would rather have described it but the letter alone was embarrassing enough without being explicitly referred to as a childish mess. He shook his head, amazed that this was something that could cause Prince Taichi so much joy. “Is this some of that romance you were planning on teaching me about?”

“Tsutomu is clearly far better versed than I am if that were the case.”

Katsumichi had heard the poem before. The writings of _Michitsuna no Haha_ were popular throughout the Archipelago of Japan, or so Katsumichi had been told when he heard this particular poem. Though he was certain it was more to do with the frustrations of gradually divorcing. He had the sneaking suspicion that Prince Tsutomu’s rendering of the poem was a far different type of loneliness. 

“This is terrible,” Katsumichi said, because that was about as much evaluation he could give.

“I find the clumsiness of it the best part. See how he wrote, ‘I hope my feelings reach you,’ and then signs the letter off with, ‘All my love.’ Youth is amazing.”

It was a struggle to keep the grin out of his voice as he spoke, so Katsumichi gave up. He still said, “Imagine if your brother could hear you say these things about him.”

There was half a second where Prince Taichi looked uncomfortable. He nodded and said, “If you would like to partake in making fun of him with me tomorrow, he would be able to hear.”

Katsumichi remembered that he had been annoyed in the first place. It was irritating how Prince Taichi had successfully distracted him from the matter at hand. How Prince Taichi had made his mood more docile and had him begging for some insignificant information. Even though he remembered why he was annoyed in the first place, remembering it only made him pathetically sad.

“How long have you known that Prince Tsutomu was coming here?”

“Only for a few days,” Prince Taichi said as though it were a mere trifle. But those few days that he had known the fact were a few days longer than Katsumichi had known.

“Prince Taichi, are we still just playing pretend?”

“What do you mean?”

“You never tell me anything. Not until it suits you. And because we are here, at this home that was given for you, everything can be done by your whims. You had Eri pass on to me information that you cannot be bothered to tell me yourself, and… I don’t understand what you mean to achieve by doing anything. All of this playing nicely with me and then ignoring me for days at a time is abhorrent.”

He decided not to reiterate his suspicions that any correspondence that was coming his way was being vetted and all of it mysteriously disappeared. He was certain that somebody in Johzenji would have written to him and the fact that he had been here for weeks without hearing anything from anybody was painfully suspicious. 

What he had said seemed to be enough because Prince Taichi looked reproachful – or as close to that as he could look without actually making a visible expression. He reached a hand across the desk, just as Katsumichi had done before but a lot less playfully. Katsumichi watched the reserved curl of fingers just before Prince Taichi brushed his fingers over Katsumichi’s cheek and then he withdrew his hand.

“I’m sorry you feel that way,” Prince Taichi said quietly.

“Is that all?”

“I don’t really know what you want me to do. Or say.”

“I want you to stop doing this,” Katsumichi said. His throat felt dry so he swallowed hard. “You said you wanted me to let you fall in love with me, but if this is what your love feels like I would rather not have it.”

Prince Taichi looked away. Katsumichi supposed he had his answer. He stood quickly and left the room. He made sure to close the door behind him.

Katsumichi thought that would be the end of it, but Prince Taichi came to his room that evening. Katsumichi tried to be subtle as he adjusted how the _yukata_ was wrapped around him. Wearing such light clothing seemed improper, but there was nothing for it. When the knock came at the door he swiftly flipped over the sheet of paper he had been contemplating. It was mostly blank but Katsumichi did not want to give himself away with the initial stroke he had drawn on the page. Maybe it was better that he was interrupted and was not about to make a fool of himself. Any letter writing could wait.

Prince Taichi’s hands were curled at his sides before he knelt on the other side of the low desk Katsumichi was sitting at. The involuntary twitch of Katsumichi’s fingers over the page did not go unnoticed. He took a deep breath and smiled as well as he could at his visitor.

“What can I do for you, Prince Taichi?”

“Allow me to apologise, Prince Katsumichi.”

It seemed like an odd request. Surely he knew that he was allowed to apologise whenever he felt the need to. Katsumichi had never felt the need to ask for permission to apologise in the past. Even now, if he was in the wrong, he would apologise without making a fuss like this. He narrowed his eyes.

“You can apologise whenever you like for whatever you like. You don’t need to ask me,” he said. 

Prince Taichi nodded slowly. “Obviously. I know that already.” So it wasn’t a cultural difference that Katsumichi had never considered before. Prince Taichi sighed and went on, “I just need you to understand the depths of my remorse.”

“Please explain it to me, _Denka_.”

The corners of Prince Taichi’s lips turned down with the tightening of his jaw. To speak at length about how sorry he was without actually apologising was redundant. Katsumichi did not really want to hear it. Surely Prince Taichi would have already known something like that himself.

“It is not my intention to make you feel inferior to me in any way. And all I truly want is to be able to fall in love with you,” Prince Taichi said. The words were fluffy enough but they did not come close to any apology Katsumichi was familiar with. He said nothing. Perhaps this was some lengthy prelude to the depths of Prince Taichi’s remorse. “On occasion I feel that already I do love you. I wish for your happiness too, Prince Katsumichi. I do not want any misfortune to befall you, so of course I would not mention that no correspondence from Johzenji has arrived here at West River so as not to draw your attention to the fact. I want you to only think of happy things, and perhaps that was a mistake on my part–”

“Of course it was a mistake on your part. I don’t even believe it to be the truth.”

“- I understand that,” Prince Taichi nodded. He continued as though the interruption had not occurred. “But there are some things I think that are better hidden from you. I don’t want you to have to think about anything that might upset you.” He paused for a moment, eyes watchful of Katsumichi for a second before he averted his eyes and added, “The Second and Eighth princes will only be here for a day or so. We shan’t need to put up with them for too long. I simply didn’t know how to bring up the subject.”

Katsumichi sat up straighter and watched the small twist of Prince Taichi’s mouth. He had to wonder why this was the reaction to the news of his brothers visiting.

“Why do you dislike your brothers?”

Prince Taichi blinked a few times, as though he was oblivious to it. He shook his head before he spoke. “I do not dislike my brothers.”

“Is it I who is disliked? You do not appear fond of any instances where we might meet.”

“No, it is not that… Of course I do not dislike you,” Prince Taichi said, hesitating. “Truthfully, I would like to keep you away from the ambitions of my brothers. I have no wishes to be king. Only to be able to live peacefully. If my father were to die tomorrow, there are no guarantees that greed for the throne would not create violence. I would hate for you to become involved in that. Worse than killing me to eliminate another threat, if they somehow reached you…”

Prince Taichi cleared his throat loudly.

Katsumichi had no idea what Prince Taichi really meant. He had heard of more barbaric practices in older kingdoms where ascension to the throne was steeped in the blood of siblings. Johzenji had no such possibilities; Crown Prince Yuuji was to take the throne and the siblings were to do everything they could to help cultivate a peaceful rule. Dying was not something he had particularly considered. For Prince Taichi to be bringing it up now was odd. It had to be an ill-thought excuse.

“If any of them wanted to do anything to me, they already know where I live,” Katsumichi pointed out.

“I will take any precaution that I can.”

“That’s all very nice,” Katsumichi said briskly, “But is this your apology?”

Prince Taichi hesitated again, his mouth agape and pupils trembling.

“Good night, Prince Taichi. I hope you sleep well,” Katsumichi said. He understood well enough. Even if Prince Taichi had said he was sorry, it would not have made much of a difference. The depths of Prince Taichi’s remorse barely left a chill around Katsumichi’s ankles so he did not feel at all bad about dismissing him.

Once alone, Katsumichi tore up the sheet he had started to write on. There was no point. If letters were not reaching him there was no doubt that they would be intercepted before reaching any of his brothers in Johzenji. He considered briefly, with the fragments of paper in his hands, whether it might be worth writing to Hana. But he had not heard much from the First Child of Johzenji in the years since she had married. The kingdoms further south must have been of a similar temperament to the local kingdoms.

 

There was nothing particularly special about Runa’s appearance the next day. In fact she was forgoing the formality of the _juunihitoe_ that Katsumichi had expected to see her in to greet two of the princes of Shiratorizawa. Runa looked pleasantly relaxed in her _tsubo shozoku_. The narrow tube-shape of her body was a lot different to the cascading of layers that she might normally have worn on such an occasion. She appeared so casual with the brightly patterned _kosode_ fanning out over the top half of her body. She patted at the wide _kake-obi_ that was tied around her chest and smiled up at Katsumichi.

“Why are you wearing that?” Katsumichi asked, suddenly feeling overdressed. His own _konoshi_ was hardly the most formal of dress, but the length of the jacket over his _hakama_ trousers was something he was used to – yet he now felt he had chosen wrong. There was a lot of extra bulk provided by the layers beneath the _karaginu_ that was draped over his body but it was not unusual. He looked to Prince Taichi who was wearing a deep blue that complemented the glimmering yellow-gold of Katsumichi’s own _karaginu_ , yet it still did not feel quite right.

He pulled at the strings under his chin that tied the tall _eboshi_ to his head, but even that did not alleviate the discomfort he had suddenly felt.

“Are you alright, Prince Katsumichi?” Runa asked, still smiling widely.

“I’m fine,” Katsumichi grumbled, retying the strings. “Why are you so… cheerful?”

“Should I not seem amiable when receiving guests?”

“Of course you should, but–”

“You should consider it too,” Prince Taichi said in a low voice. “Being amiable.”

Katsumichi did not have the chance to tell Prince Taichi how rude it was to get involved in other people’s conversations as the gates to their home were pushed open. Guards stood to attention after pushing the gates open and called for the carriages to come through.

It was not long before Prince Tsutomu tumbled from the second carriage. He righted himself quickly and looked about as though hoping he had not been seen. He most certainly had been seen and Runa had to clamp her hands to her mouth to stifle her giggles.

“Thirteenth Child and Eighth Prince Tsutomu of the Fearsome Kingdom of Shiratoirzawa offers his most sincere greetings,” Prince Tsutomu shouted, bowing deeply. He straightened his back, his cheeks were red as he looked between the three standing before them.

Prince Wakatoshi walked slowly across the courtyard, with a lot more grace than Prince Tsutomu had. Once in front of them all he bowed. “Second child and Second Prince Wakatoshi of the Fearsome Kingdom of Shiratorizawa thanks you for your hospitality.”

It quickly became apparent that Prince Taichi was not going to say anything. He was not very convincing if he claimed that he did not dislike his brothers. Katsumichi smiled as well as he could and inclined his head. “We hope that your stay at West River will be enjoyable.”

There were a few more awkward moments before Runa hissed in Katsumichi’s ear that they should all go to the main hall. Wondering why this was not Prince Taichi’s responsibility, Katsumichi asked the newcomers to follow as they made their way to the main hall. They all sat around a low, round table. Nobody said anything until Eri, and Kaori had poured them all tea and offered them fruit.

“Prince Wakatoshi, do you have any business in the area?” Katsumichi asked, because it seemed everything would be up to him today.

Prince Wakatoshi looked surprised, his fingertips fluttering in their grip around the small teacup in his hands. “I am in the area on behalf of the king. I must request that the families around West River employ more soldiers in order to secure the peace of the kingdom.”

“Oh,” Katsumichi said politely. “That sounds interesting.” It didn’t sound interesting at all and Prince Wakatoshi did not look pleased to hear the lie.

“I don’t believe it would be of any great interest,” He said. “I assume Taichi declined the duty simply because it would be a dull and difficult task.”

Prince Tsutomu stiffened, glancing at Prince Wakatoshi beside him, before quickly draining his own tea cup. “This is delicious!”

“Of course you would assume I declined because it might be difficult.”

“Why else would you have declined?” Prince Wakatoshi asked, blinking owlishly. “I appreciate it must be difficult to ask so much of your relatives considering you are doing nothing to win them favour in the royal court.”

Prince Taichi was quiet for a moment. The eyes of the others did nothing to deter him from speaking, though after hearing the reasoning, Katsumichi wished that Prince Taichi had kept his mouth shut after all. “I did not think it was necessary.”

“You think you know better than the King?” Prince Tsutomu squawked. He looked around the table nervously and Katsumichi could not blame him.

“If you truly have no desire for the throne I would suggest you do not engage in the unwise behaviour that affects our kingdom detrimentally,” Prince Wakatoshi said, placing down his teacup. He looked at Katsumichi and then Runa. “Or might there be other kingdoms intending to weaken the fearsome kingdom of Shiratorizawa?”

“These oranges are so sweet!” Prince Tsutomu exclaimed around a mouthful of fruit. He barely made it to the end of his sentence before choking. Luckily for him, Runa was close enough to roughly pat his back. Prince Wakatoshi had been closer but it seemed he was more preoccupied with making accusations of treason.

“You’d like that, wouldn’t you, Prince Wakatoshi,” Prince Taichi said in a low voice. “If you think that to be the case you might as well try us with your sword now. Though I must say I would not allow you to easily take the throne from the Crown Prince without some trouble. I’m not certain you are the hero Shiratorizawa needs.”   

Prince Wakatoshi tilted his head and frowned hard at Prince Taichi. “If that were the case, how exactly would you stop me? I am much more accomplished than you are with the sword.”

 

Prince Taichi was not a person wealthy in expression most of the time, but he had worn an unmistakable glower for the duration of Prince Wakatoshi’s stay. Katsumichi could not blame him. There was something abrasive about Shiratorizawa’s second prince that he did not recognise himself.

Katsumichi did not know why he was the one to listen to the extensive list of reasons that the bathing facilities at West River were not at the desired standard. Katsumichi knew exactly why he had to listen to Prince Wakatoshi speak alone. As soon as Prince Taichi had heard the slow lumbering of the freshly-washed Prince Wakatoshi, he fled. His face was inscrutable as ever as he left, though not for the usual reasons; rather than blankness there was irritation that Katsumichi could only hope was misdirected.

It was unfortunate that the walk through the grounds was aborted so quickly. Prince Taichi had apparently meant to show Katsumichi where Runa and Prince Tsutomu went to spar. Or flirt as Prince Taichi had insisted. The pair of them had been walking through the corridor away from the baths when they somehow encountered Prince Wakatoshi, donning an oddly tight-fitting _yukata_.

“Prince Wakatoshi,” Katsumichi said, interrupting the recommendations to remedy the fact that the _ofuro_ rooms were too dark. He smiled pleasantly, because back home he had always been told it softened the impact of words that someone didn’t want to hear. “Might you tread more lightly around West River?”

Prince Wakatoshi glanced down at his feet and frowned. The toes of his _tabi_ wriggled in his _geta_ sandals. “I am quite heavy.”

“I did not mean it literally, Prince Wakatoshi,” Katsumichi said. He was already regretting that he hadn’t made his escape with Prince Taichi. “What I mean is it might make for a more pleasant visit if you were less inflammatory, especially towards Prince Taichi.”

“I had no illusions about this being a pleasant visit.”

“I see,” Katsumichi said, though he did not see at all. He did not much like Shiratorizawa after all. He nodded to Prince Wakatoshi, hoping his countenance was polite. “In that case I hope that your stay at West River is as uncomfortable as possible.”

Katsumichi continued on his way. There was still a chance he might find Prince Taichi so that he could decide for himself whether or not his approximation that Runa and Prince Tsutomu were _flirting_ was true or not. He had only made it a few steps before he heard the call of his name.

“Prince Katsumichi,” Prince Wakatoshi said.

Katsumichi hesitated before he turned. He was faced with the broad of Prince Wakatoshi’s back and there was an odd prickle at the back of his neck. He could sense already that he would not like the next words, not if he was unable to see the eyes that accompanied the words.

“Prince Katsumichi, I am sorry that you had to marry my brother.”

“What?”

“It is obvious that neither of you like each other much, but I hope you won’t let feelings like that affect your view of Shiratorizawa. I would not like to hear of anything that might erode the relations between Shiratorizawa and Johzenji.”

Katsumichi wondered how Prince Wakatoshi had managed to get through life without being punched daily. It was probably due to his size that people avoided giving him what he deserved. The same sense of self-preservation that made other people avoid engaging Prince Wakatoshi further flooded through Katsumichi. He walked without a word until he found himself at the river.

 

Katsumichi could not be more glad of the day Prince Wakatoshi would return to the palace. Not only was he ridding himself of a rather large nuisance, Yukie finally decided she was friends with Katsumichi again. The morning had begun just as dull and lethargic as was usual at West River until Yukie bounded into Katsumichi’s room with his breakfast and demanded to be given at least half. If hunger was what it took for Yukie to want to speak to Katsumichi, he was glad he was born a prince.

“I hate him so much,” He grumbled while Yukie scrubbed between his toes. Venting to clear his mind while his body became clean was the best. He knew it was selfish to immediately burden Yukie with his complaints the second they were on good terms.

“I think a lot of people probably feel the same way,” Yukie grinned.

“I think I hate him the most though.”

Yukie smirked suspiciously. She trilled her fingertips against the sole of Katsumichi’s foot. “I’m not sure that’s true.”

“Why? Do you hate him more?”

Yukie shook her head quickly, still grinning up at Katsumichi. There was always something a bit suspicious about Yukie’s smiles. There were times when it was a fun thing to see because Katsumichi would feel like he knew the secret sealed behind her teeth, like he was in on the joke, but this was not one of those times. This was more like Katsumichi was desperate to know the truth to the matter, desperate to know how she would know so much more than he did.

“Servants talk. You might think that the gold we are paid buys our silence but we all need something to pass the time,” Yukie said, still grinning. “Gossip is almost as good as gold.”

For an odd moment, Katsumichi did not feel so safe. Naked, skin scrubbed raw, and his feet folded into Yukie’s lap. She knew everything about him, and it had only now occurred to him that any number of people could claim the same thing. He trusted Yukie with his life. There was the distinct possibility that she was capable of undoing him.

He tried not to sound too vulnerable as he hazarded, “What do you know?”

“Everything.”

Katsumichi swallowed. “What can you tell me?”

Yukie feigned thoughtfulness as she stared up at Katsumichi. “Rumour has it that Prince Wakatoshi is not well liked outside of Shiratorizawa. Within the kingdom he is one of the most favoured princes due to the image of strength and reliability he has cultivated,” Yukie began. Katsumichi wondered how much effort had gone into spreading such propaganda. Prince Wakatoshi did not seem particularly reliable. “But there is a certain old family that used to be an allied kingdom to Shiratorizawa where he is very disliked. Something like repeated proposals to a person who genuinely hates him have only exacerbated the situation.”

“Where is it that they don’t like him?”

“I can’t tell you that much,”

“Why not?” Katsumichi asked. Slowly, Yukie formed a circle with her thumb and index finger. She raised her hand so her palm faced her chest and the remaining three fingers on her hand fanned out. If it was like that, there was nothing that Katsumichi could do. He said, “I don’t have any money.”

“Then that is as much as I can say,” She shrugged. “So, why is it that you hate him so much again?”

Katsumichi huffed unhappily. He was well aware that she was setting him off again for her own amusement, but if she wanted to hear it then Katsumichi was going to give her what she wanted.

“He thinks he is so great just because he is so big and stupid. I really can’t believe the people of Shiratorizawa love him so much.”

“Wouldn’t you feel safer with a great big warrior king?” Yukie asked with a sly grin.

“No. Why would anybody need such a thing in a time of peace,” Katsumichi grumbled. He was being dishonest. He knew exactly why anybody would want such an imposing king. Peace was only peace if there was no chance of battles. To force peace there needed to be an imbalance of power, or at least a perceived imbalance of power.

“You are just as unpolitical as that spouse of yours, right?” Yukie grinned widely. “That is what I am supposed to think, isn’t it?”

Katsumichi wasn’t sure what he was supposed to say to that. It was not that he was truly unpolitical. He was away from the centre of diplomacy at Johzenji, and the same was true of Shiratorizawa. There was no point in him getting involved, not really. But it did not mean that he had to be happy about things he could not help. He was just thinking up his unsatisfactory retort when there was a knock at the door.

Katsumichi and Yukie only had the chance to turn their heads before the door was sliding open and Prince Wakatoshi blocked out the light he had created.

“The devil himself,” Yukie muttered.

“Prince Katsumichi, I was told I would find you here,” Prince Wakatoshi said. Katsumichi wondered who would possibly tell him such a thing. It wasn’t usual to direct someone to the baths when they were in search of somebody. It would be more proper to wait. Katsumichi would not put it past Prince Wakatoshi to have somehow misunderstood something as basic as that.

“Were you also told to disturb me?”

“I shall be returning straight to the main palace once the contracts have been signed, so this is the only time I have to bid you farewell,” Prince Wakatoshi said, still in the doorway. It took some great effort to suppress the shivers that threatened beneath Katsumichi’s skin. He was not fond of such strong draughts while he was bathing.

“You need not have exerted such an effort to be polite,” Katsumichi said, omitting the ‘for once’ that had been on the tip of his tongue. Yukie frowned up at him and he was not surprised at the confused glee twisting at Yukie’s lips. Of course he did not actually mean that Prince Wakatoshi was being polite now, but he had already said it. He would simply have to hope that Prince Wakatoshi realised the faux pas on his own.

“I thought it prudent to thank you properly for your hospitality.”

“I am sure Prince Taichi could have adequately received your thanks,” Katsumichi said.

“I could not find him,” Prince Wakatoshi supplied. Of course that would be the case. How convenient.

“What about Princess Runa,” Katsumichi suggested.

“I could not find her either.” That was something that Katsumichi did not predict. Not until Prince Wakatoshi added, “I think she may be preoccupied with Prince Tsutomu. I was told they were at the river but it was too large of an area for me to search. So I came to find you. You were the easiest to find.”

Katsumichi narrowed his eyes. This was not a game. He was bathing and trying to relax. He was also still very naked and annoyed that he was still subjected to the chill of outside. “Thank you for your farewell,” Katsumichi said. “Perhaps next time it would be prudent of you to avoid disturbing me while I am naked.”

“Why?” Prince Wakatoshi asked. “It is nothing I haven’t seen before.”

Yukie didn’t even try to stifle her laughter as it burst from her chest.

“Is she alright?” Prince Wakatoshi asked, sounding genuinely concerned.

“Yes, she is fine. Goodbye, Prince Wakatoshi,” He replied sharply. It was still far too long before the door was closed but Prince Wakatoshi was finally gone. Katsumichi had expected that he would be unable to properly relax once he was in the _ofuro_.

 

Prince Taichi had claimed to tell Katsumichi about the invitation to the main palace the day that he received it. He was clutching at the letter and read it out rapidly, stumbling over the words as soon as he found Katsumichi at the river bank. It was nothing he had been so bothered about before, but Katsumichi supposed his words had resonated at some level.

Celebrations for the Crown Prince’s day of birth were upon them and there would have to be a gift presented to him. The gift they had given to Prince Wakatoshi was just a clay lantern with intricate bronze patterns inspired by the continental trends forged from the metal. Apparently more thought would have to go into a present for the Crown Prince.

“Tea,” Runa suggested when Katsumichi asked for a suggestion. It seemed good enough. The tea in Shiratorizawa was plain and perhaps it would be nice to experience something with a bit more flavour. Katsumichi had sent off for tea when he had arrived at West River. He needed some sort of normality to survive, and he knew that Runa had brought a lot more of it with her when she came to live with them.

Prince Taichi hadn’t had much of an opinion of the suggestion and they were packed off into their carriages with the Johzenji tea.

Upon arrival to the main palace, Lady Yue was once again ready to receive Katsumichi, Prince Taichi and Runa. She was dressed much more plainly than usual, Katsumichi’s ears ringing with the absence of the usual tinkling of ornaments. Her _juunihitoe_ seemed about the usual size, her body bulked with the endless layers of silk jackets but they were plainer. Lady Yue’s face had not dulled with the shades of her clothes. She smiled widely at the three of them as they arrived.

“It is good to see you in good health, _Haha-ue_ ,” Prince Taichi said with a low bow. Katsumichi and Runa lowered into their own bows and when they all stood, Lady Yue regarded them happily.

“I see that the three of you are getting along well. The West River must be treating you well,” She smiled.

“The climate there is better at West River than here at the main palace,” Prince Taichi said, not even muting his voice for the benefit of his mother. Lady Yue’s brows drew together.

“I had assumed that this would be already apparent, but I am expecting you to be on your best behaviour while here at the main palace. I love you dearly, but I do not wish to live with you and return to my family at West River.”

Prince Taichi exhaled heavily at his mother’s words and turned to Katsumichi with a stiff smile stretched across his face. “I suppose that goes for you too. Don’t inconvenience my mother with such an uncouth existence as mine.”

“Taichi!” Lady Yue chided.

It was odd for Prince Taichi to take offence to something like that. From what little Katsumichi had seen of his relationship with Lady Yue, they were fond of one another. It would not be unusual for a lady of the court to be cautious of her own place in the palace. Her only child was already married, in a union which brooked no possibility for politics as high as the throne, and despite how favoured she may have been by the king herself there were other people to please.

There was the chance she had heard how poorly Prince Taichi and Prince Wakatoshi mixed. Whether she had heard what had happened at the recent visit or she knew from previous instances, but even Katsumichi could glean what the warning pertained to.

There was no doubt Runa new what this was all about too. She had taken to distancing herself from all the tense talk for calmer things like rowing boats with Prince Tsutomu.

“Princess Runa, you look positively radiant,” Lady Yue said as she waved away her son. She linked her arm with Runa’s and led the way to the tent they had been to for Prince Wakatoshi’s birthday celebration. For the birthday of the Crown Prince, not much was different in terms of the grandeur. The gardens around the tent were just as verdant and fragrant as the last time. The seating arrangements were the same with the same sprays of flowers around the table and the towering stacks of fruit placed along the table. The only discernible difference was how the court ladies were dressed.

All of them were dressed in blocks of colour rather than glittering brocades and gradating silks. Those seemed to be reserved for the Queens sat either side of the king at the high table that was bisected by the table for the princes, their wives and their mothers. And Runa who had obviously not been told that plainer clothes would be in the dress-code. She continued to smile pleasantly and Katsumichi admired her calm. He would have felt irritable himself at being in the same situation, a potential target for any snide remarks.

Lady Yue hadn’t made any comments on it, not that Katsumichi had heard as they walked, but as they bowed before the king and the Crown Prince, he noticed how both of the Queens pursed their lips and exchanged a look. A few of the court ladies at the table looked surprised enough that they were delayed in their attempts to remain composed. The most shocked of all was clearly Prince Tsutomu – his mouth agape and his eyes wide as he stared at Runa through the flush of his own face.

When the King allowed them to sit, Katsumichi felt relieved. At least Prince Tsutomu’s gormless gawking would not have to be conducted from afar. It would be quite unbecoming. It was also wonderful that Lady Mai and Prince Reon were nearby. They offered small smiles, and there was a tilt to Lady Mai’s head that radiated sympathy.  

Queen Fumie’s face was stiff as she spoke, her eyes lingering on Runa in a way that had the hairs at the back of Katsumichi’s neck standing on end. “Thank you for travelling all this way to celebrate the day of my son’s birth.”

“Of course we would,” Prince Taichi said, inclining his head towards the straight-backed woman above. “To receive the invitation to be here is a great honour.”

Queen Fumie nodded her head shortly. There was something odd about the other queen’s countenance. Katsumichi could only call the expression she wore smug, but it didn’t seem like a good fit for the situation.

“For a day as auspicious as this,” Prince Taichi added, “The gift from West River has travelled much further than that. Especially for our future king, a delicacy that could only before be tasted in Johzenji will be presented to the Crown Prince.”

Crown Prince Jin peered over from the other end of the table with rapt interest. “Is that so, Taichi? Prince Katsumichi, Princess Runa, thank you both so much for allowing me to receive such a gift. What is it?”

“Tea,” Katsumichi said quickly. Then added, “ _Koutaishi_.” Just in case his tone was misconstrued.

“That sounds interesting,” The Crown Prince said, clasping his hands together happily.

“That went well,” Prince Taichi drawled quietly. The king had begun some speech or other which made reference to constant lateness from some of his sons, but that was irrelevant to Prince Taichi.

“What do you mean?”

“How would you feel if someone gave you tea as a gift?”

“I would be ecstatic if I had put up with a lifetime of the bland water the people of your kingdom call tea,” Katsumichi replied. He was trying to keep his own voice down but Runa snorted and of course that had drawn the attention of Prince Tsutomu.

Runa managed to avert his eyes with a small smile and they managed to get away with just a minor disturbance at the table. Katsumichi was just glad that Lady Hau was a good enough actress to pretend she hadn’t been able to hear the same things as her son.

Following the speeches came food and soothing music. Everything was delectable as expected and the music was pleasant enough. The servants soon removed the empty platters and dishes and brought out drinks for the party. A few of the princes were served _sake_ , though most of the attendees had pots of tea brought out for them. The ceramic cups were matched with the pots, differing shades for each guest with stippled patterns which curled around the handle and spread to the belly of the pot.

The servant who approached with Crown Prince Jin’s tea looked ill. She was pale and the tremor of her hands was audible as the ceramic lid of the pot rattled against the rim. She licked her dry lips as she walked with slow, careful steps. Crown Prince Jin smiled at her patiently until she was finally close enough to set the tea pot down. Even though she was that close, she must have had a dizzy spell and when she made to kneel beside the Crown Prince she toppled and her fingers loosened.

“ _Koutaishi_!” The servant exclaimed, her eyes wide and her hands shaking more than ever as she spread her hands, “Are you alright?”

Their stations in the palace were well adhered to but even so, Katsumichi wondered why the girl with slashes of red and splinters of ceramic in her palms was so eager to tend to the Crown Prince. The tea had spilled and at worse was soaking into the silk of his deep purple _karaginu_. He was wearing many layers beneath it and due to the colour of the Crown Prince’s clothing the stain would not be so much trouble that it would be a bother today. He would likely dispose of the garment after today because there must have been numerous _karaginu_ exactly the same in the Crown Prince’s possession.

Still trembling, the girl lowered herself into _dogeza_ and pressed her palms to the ground. Katsumichi could not help but wince at that. It was not something he was familiar with but the pressure of her sincerity must have driven slivers of the smashed teapot further into her flesh. There was no doubt she was right in the middle of the spill herself, the liquid not far from boiling seeping into the weave of her _kosode_ and scorching her skin.

“Crown Prince Jin of the Fearsome Kingdom of Shiratorizawa, I offer my sincerest apologies for causing harm to you. It was not my intention to sully the celebrations for the day of your birth and I will prepare myself for any punishment you see fit.”

There was a moment, and Katsumichi hated himself for watching but he was not alone in his curiosity, where the Crown Prince frowned. It wasn’t the sort of expression that Katsumichi had come to associate with Shiratorizawa, nothing like the hard frowns and immovable indifference that so many of the other princes fixed their faces in. The Crown Prince looked sorrowful himself, as though he regretted that the incident had happened at all and he would have to discipline the girl for something so insignificant. He placed a hand on the servant’s shoulder and squeezed. “Kazu, I understand how deeply sorry you are. I understand the nuances of your heart and how you regret to have had such a thing happen in your usually dutiful care. You should rest. Send someone here to clean this up and then you should go and rest.”

The servant, Kazu, sat up, but she did not lift her face. She nodded jerkily and though she was making an effort to hide her expression the smeared tears and the glistening below her nose were visible. She slowly rose to her feet.

Hopefully that would be it and Crown Prince Jin would be as benevolent as his name suggested, but it was impossible to tell what would happen once a person was away from the eyes of their peers. A glance at Prince Taichi’s clear countenance suggested he had no such worries, yet Katsumichi could not stop himself from speaking up.

“Forgive me for speaking out of turn, Crown Prince Jin, but I feel that perhaps rather than an act of clumsiness this is an opportunity for something fortunate,” He said. The Crown Prince made an expression that was more reminiscent of his brothers than any of the ones he had made before but he gestured for Katsumichi to continue. “Perhaps this is the perfect time for you to sample the gift from Seventh Prince Taichi and Fourth Prince of Johzenji, Prince Katsumichi. I expect that you won’t have had tea anything like the blend that was created by the tea masters of Johzenji.”

“That sounds like a wonderful idea,” The Crown prince said as he clapped his hands together. “Kazu, take the box of tea with you as I am curious about this blend.”

Kazu bowed and shuffled to the table of gifts. Her hands still shook as she grasped the box of tea, her fingers turning white against the jade case of the box. She left slowly, not so much as sniffing as she shuffled away, apology writ on her face.

“You are shameless,” Prince Taichi said quietly.

“Whatever do you mean?”

There was something of a smirk around Prince Taichi’s lips. When they parted he seemed to remember the tension that had stretched between them since Prince Wakatoshi had visited them at West River. He would have said something playfully cutting, just as usual, but the thought of what he would say plucked at the suspense and Katsumichi supposed there was uncertainty of whether the sound would fall on the same ears it always had.

Prince Taichi shut his lips tightly. He sighed and said, “Think nothing of it, I do apologise.”

Katsumichi wasn’t going to bother thinking anything of it. He poured himself some tea from the pot that had been placed in front of him when the servants had brought out the tea for everyone, intricately designed pots for each guest. The painting on Katsumichi’s pot was a koi with tiny diamond scales in graduated shades of brown and orange on a pale green background. It was pretty and Katsumichi would have to suggest something similarly decadent for the Johzenji teapots.

He sipped his tea from a cup that matched the pale green of the background, though it would have benefitted from the swish of a tail or bubbles that followed the koi on the teapot. The tea inside could have done with some improvements too. The aroma was as plain as was expected from a standard brewed tea but there was something sharp about it as it slipped over his taste buds.

He took another sip and kept the tea in his mouth, discreetly swilling it over his tongue. Still, there was something not quite right with it and he wondered whether there had in fact been a Shiratorizawa blend of tea all along. If there had it needed more work.

“May I ask something of you?” Katsumichi asked quietly.

Prince Taichi raised his eyebrows so it was probably as permissible a response as he was going to get, but Prince Tsutomu was squinting suspiciously at them from across the table. Katsumichi smiled brightly at Prince Tsutomu, who looked as embarrassed as he was annoyed, and placed down his cup of tea. It was just close enough to Prince Taichi’s hand that the meaning could be understood. Prince Taichi curled his fingers around the cup as naturally as could be and brought it to his lips. He shrugged at Katsumichi.

“Don’t you think it tastes odd?”

“Not particularly.”

“Maybe I should ask Crown Prince Jin to share some of that tea with me,” Katsumichi offered as he drained his cup. He tried not to wince too visibly at the aftertaste and he had to wipe at the corners of his eyes and when he looked back to his spouse he was met with yet another infuriatingly blank expression.

“Maybe,” Prince Taichi said.

Katsumichi didn’t ask for any of the tea once it was brought out to the Crown Prince. The servants were swift as they cleaned up the debris and offered further apologies on behalf of Kazu and the Crown Prince looked impressed by the tea in the pot that was brought out to him. 

“This is delicious, Prince Katsumichi. Such an unusual flavour.”

“It is one of the secrets of Johzenji,” Katsumichi said with a smile. He sniffed quietly, hopeful that he had successfully hidden the act behind a quick draw of tea from his second cup.

“I shall not ask you to divulge such a thing,” Crown Prince Jin said. “I might hold the hope that next year I am allowed the same gift.”

“Of course, _Koutaishi_ ,” Katsumichi said.

He was glad when the conversation turned away from the tea from Johzenji and Prince Hayato mentioned something about the blends of tea he had sampled in his travels on the continent. They were probably more complex and fragrant than the tea that Katsumichi had thought appropriate for a gift but Katsumichi couldn’t concentrate.

Perhaps it was the odd sharpness of the tea he had been drinking coupled with the already thick taste of the broth he had eaten, but Katsumichi’s stomach roiled and he couldn’t focus properly on nodding and looking agreeable. And then he realised what was about to happen.

If he opened his mouth at this point it was very likely that something particularly unpleasant and unbecoming would occur. He tried to breathe deeply through his nose. But it was not enough. He tried to look natural as he reached his hand across to Prince Taichi’s thigh, and squeezed at the stiffened silk of his _hakama_.

“Are you alright?”

Katsumichi shook his head, not quickly enough to convey his urgency but Prince Taichi seemed to understand as Katsumichi’s fist tightened. He tapped the back of Katsumichi’s hand to make him release his grip and he stood. Prince Eita was midway through a sentence but broke off with a half-patient pull of his lips.

“Do you have something to say, Seventh Prince?” The King asked sternly from his vantage-point.

“Yes, _Heika_. The Fourth Prince of Johzenji and I, Seventh Prince of Shiratorizawa, wish to be excused.”

The King stared down at Prince Taichi and Katsumichi tried to slow his breathing in case the request was denied and he would have to endure more chatter while he tried not to spew his stomach contents over Prince Tsutomu and Lady Hau. He was already composing his apology when the king finally spoke.

“Very well. I am disappointed that you wish to leave at such a time but it cannot be helped.”

Runa made an indignant noise from Katsumichi’s other side but he was already scrambling to his feet to leave the tent with Prince Taichi.

When they were a fair distance away, Prince Taichi asked, “Why did we have to leave?”

Katsumichi shook his head, still not confident that he was capable of not making a mess. The tent was so far away from the rest of the palace and it was an unnecessary extravagance. It was a shame that this exact incident had not been considered when designing the layout of the palace and he had to speed up as they approached a large bush that looked like it was dying anyway.

He didn’t like to think of what could have happened.

He didn’t particularly like to think about the fact that he was heaving his insides into the branches of this bush. It was mostly what he expected, half-chewed vegetables, the liquid the same colour as the broth he had eaten, though further gags and pulls from his abdomen brought up globs of red so dark it looked black.

“Katsumichi!”

The hand on his back was nice enough that he was aware that he was not actually spinning on the spot, but it didn’t help much when he was still coughing up blood and bile. He felt his arms collapse beneath him and he groaned minutely as the sharp tang of acid dribbled down his chin and onto his clothes. It was harder to breathe and his stomach hurt more than it ever had before and none of this made any sense.

Katsumichi wasn’t anybody too important but as the world around him continued to spin away from him with each clenching of his stomach muscles there was one thing that was abundantly clear. He had ingested poison.


	8. Protection

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the days after being poisoned, Prince Katsumichi begins to recover.

Katsumichi felt a sharp warmth rising to his throat. He lurched to the side, impeded by the weight of covers that were wound around him. His spluttering brought up more bile and blood than he would have expected. It coated his tongue and he could not help but whine pathetically as he tried to spit the taste out of his mouth.

The tell-tale slide of wood preceded the light footsteps of _tabi_ across the _tatami_. Then a sharp gasp that sliced through his ears as deeply as the warmth sliced through his chest.

“ _Denka_!”

There was a flurry of silk and small hands on his back. “Prince Katsumichi, we will get this cleaned up right away.”

“Eri, what are you doing here?” He slurred on the tail of a sour belch.

“Prince Taichi had us come to the main palace while you are all detained here.”

“Detained?” Katsumichi asked. He was aware that he was not back at West River because the light filtering through the _washi_ wall he had caught a glimpse of before chucking his guts up was a different colour to his room at home.

“The royal doctor would like to keep an eye on you,” Eri said quietly. She urged Katsumichi to sit up and pressed a cup of water to his lips. His throat was dry but even as he swallowed against the water his throat stung and his mouth was still coated in sick. “He has reason to believe that you were poisoned.”

“I have reason to believe that too.”

“I’m glad that you still have a sense of humour, _Denka_.” Eri gave him a small smile and pushed his shoulder to lie back down again. On the tray she had brought in she placed down the cup of water and wrung out the cloth that was soaking in a bowl of cool water. There was a clink of glass and she dispensed a few drops of oil onto the cloth before draping it across his forehead.

“What is that smell?”

“It is an oil to help you stop you feeling sick.”

“I liked that oil you used before, on my first night. It was nice and warm.”

Eri looked mildly alarmed as she busied herself with the tray beside her. She didn’t say anything until Kaori came in with a tray of cloths and water and yet more bottles of oil. Katsumichi watched as Kaori methodically scrubbed at the tatami and placed a peppermint scented cloth over the area.

“Maybe we can give you that oil again one day. When you’re feeling better,” Eri said.

“When I’m not dying?”

“You’re not dying,” Kaori said brusquely. Her face was pale aside from the redness of her cheeks and her eyebrows were drawn together. She tapped an empty bowl on the floor beside Katsumichi’s head. “Use this if you feel sick again. And stop saying things like that. Princess Runa has asked to know when you wake so that she can visit you. I will not be sending her in if you are going to be saying such morbid things.”

“What am I supposed to say then, Kaori?”

“I don’t know,” She blustered, looking just as cross with herself as she was with Katsumichi. “I don’t suppose you would know why somebody would do a thing like this to you?”

Katsumichi shook his head and Kaori closed her eyes and smiled grimly.

“Prince Taichi has been causing trouble around the palace,” Eri said. “He does not seem to think that you were the intended target. But even after he heard that Kazu had also been feeling sick like you, he… he was not very nice to her.”

“What do you mean?” Katsumichi asked. He licked his lips. They were dry and his tongue was rough.

“He slapped her,” Kaori spat. “She was in almost as bad a state as you but as soon as she was awake he demanded to hear who made her do this and when she couldn’t answer him he slapped her.”

“Kazu has never done a thing wrong in her life,” Eri said softly. “Prince Taichi is not officially under arrest but he is not allowed to leave the room he has been kept in. Crown Prince Jin does not take the mistreatment of his people lightly.”

This must have been what Eri had really meant when she had said they were detained. It seemed fair that attacking one of the Crown Prince’s own servants would have consequences but it seemed odd that Prince Taichi would have resorted to such a thing in the first place. Surely he should have known that even if she was the culprit there was usually more at stake than could be threatened by an outsider. To truly control a servant, to ensure she could do no more than obey an order to attempt regicide, somebody would need to be able to reach their family and everything else that was dear to the servant. Prince Taichi should have known that even if Kazu was the one who had poisoned Katsumichi that she would not reveal the truth to the matter if the lives of her family were in danger.

“I don’t agree with what he did to Kazu,” Kaori said but her lips twitched as she added, “First he went after Prince Wakatoshi and told him to realise this was his fault. That some idiot had made an attempt on the life of the Crown Prince to secure the throne for him and that he would pay for not keeping his supporters under control. That might already have created a bad situation that he made worse.”

“Idiot. How could he make Prince Wakatoshi pay?” Katsumichi grumbled.

“Unfortunately I believe Prince Taichi would attempt the deed before he considered the odds himself,” Kaori muttered. Her eyes met Katsumichi’s after a moment and she said, “But it is good that he thinks of you preciously.”

Katsumichi felt a wave of heat that had nothing to do with the fever his body was blistering with – in short, it was refreshing. It only intensified when Eri, smiling gently added, “Despite how it initially seemed, I think the pair of you make a good match. When we return to West River I expect to see plenty of evidence to see that you learnt how easily this good fortune could have been lost.”

“Actually now that you mention it I should probably get back to sleeping, or dying,” Katsumichi grumbled. He tugged at the covers but Kaori tapped at the back of his hand.

“Remember the bowl is here in case you feel sick and we will leave the water for you to drink on your other side. We will send for Princess Runa seeing as you are in a better mood now.”

“She will be glad to know you are feeling better,” Eri smiled. They both stood and bowed before they left and Katsumichi was alone. It was peaceful, he supposed, but he felt more worried than anything else.

Sappiness aside, Katsumichi was not sure what it would take for Prince Taichi to be released. Things had remained tense between them no matter how hard Katsumichi tried not to mind. He was still certain that he hadn’t been outcast by his family. Arata and Runa had been wonderful to him in person and there was no reason to believe that he had been forgotten about in the time he had been acclimatising to Shiratorizawa.

It might not even have been Prince Taichi’s fault that Katsumichi had no contact from the people he loved most dearly but Katsumichi didn’t really have anywhere else to concentrate his distaste at his loneliness. All he had now was his sister and his spouse and at least one of those people was doing nothing to ease the situation for Katsumichi.

He couldn’t imagine a situation where he would be almost all that somebody had but would still decide to cause trouble and get himself locked up.

His head ached. It was not as though his thoughts on the matter would be worth anything now, and his stomach felt tender. He did not feel quite as much like expelling his insides as he had earlier so he supposed the cloying scent of the oil on the cloth across his forehead was doing something to smother the upheaval he felt inside.

The _fusuma_ slid open and closed and Runa slowly made her way into the room. She knelt beside Katsumichi and her eyes raked over his face in the seconds before she spoke. She was wearing different clothes to the day of Crown Prince Jin’s birthday and he realised he had not even thought to ask what day it was, how long he had been drifting between sleeping and vomiting. He must have at least have been in this state for half a day, but of course it was not dark enough outside the room for it to be the evening.

“You look terrible,” Runa said. She was attempting to smile but the muscles of her face were working against her. She looked drawn and her eyes were bloodshot.

“You look terrible too,” Katsumichi said. Because she did.

“Would you prefer me to look well while my brother is suffering in this way?” Runa asked. She sighed and pressed her lips together. “I wish we could leave this place.”

“What do you expect? Prince Taichi attacked somebody in the palace.”

“No, I mean that I wish we could return to Johzenji.” Runa’s shoulders curled in and she looked so small even while bundled in dozens of layers of silk. “I thought I was ready for things like this but I cannot put up with this for too much longer. I want to be able to take you back home where things like this don’t happen.”

“It was just an accident.”

Runa scoffed. “I find it hard to believe that a meeting of royals resulted in this by accident.” Her hands had been small, tight fists on her lap as she spoke but she smoothed out the silk over her thighs with the slow sweep of trembling hands. She straightened her back but any strong will she was hoping to inject into her appearance was lost when Katsumichi looked to her eyes, still red and beginning to water. “What would you have done to attract such poor fortune? You might have taken the dose yourself but it is clear that the very heart of the kingdom of Shiratorizawa circulates poison throughout its politics.”

“Who have you been talking to that made you become so disillusioned so soon?”

 Runa huffed but eventually admitted, “Eighth Prince Tsutomu is nice once you get to know him.”

“He seems odd.”

“Not odd, just ambitious. He cannot be so straightforward with his desires that go above his station,” Runa sniffed primly.

Katsumichi had to wonder how much the pair of them had spoken for Runa to decide that Prince Tsutomu was ambitious. He knew that they had spent a lot of time together sailing boats and walking through the mountains. It had never occurred to him to think deeply about what they would talk about. He had imagined Prince Tsutomu squawking in indignation at a great many things while Runa politely laughed and told him he was funny, even though it was unintentional.

To think that Prince Tsutomu had been telling Runa all about his ambitions. They were probably as ridiculous as Katsumichi could imagine.

“You have been speaking to him for a while,” Katsumichi said, “Why have you now decided that Shiratoizawa is so evil?”

“Would something like this have happened at home?” Runa pressed. “Prince Tsutomu wants to change Shiratorizawa. He has heard about how beautiful and fair life is in Johzenji and he wishes to create a Shiratorizawa that is more like that. A kingdom that is known more for its brilliance than ferocity. He wants to shape Shiratorizawa into something as virtuous as Johzenji.”

“Are you absolutely certain that he is not just saying such things to woo you?”

“He would do no such thing, not now that I am betrothed.” Katsumichi sat up quickly and Runa wailed and pushed at his shoulders. “Lie back down, you’re still sick.”

Katsumichi choked a bit and found himself having to spit out the tackiness in his mouth. He caught the cloth that had been placed over his forehead earlier and slapped it back over his head as he lay back down. He made sure to look as obedient as possible before he asked, “To whom are you betrothed?”

“Second Prince Wakatoshi,” Runa said quietly as though she had never rolled her eyes at Katsumichi’s question. “The request from Crown Prince Yuuji was accepted yesterday and I’m not sure why he sent it.” She sniffed and blinked rapidly before giving a watery smile. “Prince Taichi thinks that Shiratorizawa would not have accepted the request had you not been poisoned. He actually asked me if it was me who poisoned you. If I had fed back information that there was a faction of Shiratorizawa who were in support of Prince Wakatoshi taking the throne next and that I should marry him to secure the future of Johzenji as an independent kingdom.”

“Johzenji does not need the support of Shiratorizawa to remain as the virtuous kingdom,” Katsumichi said, his jaw tense.

“I know but he said…” Runa cut off her sentence midway and shook her head. “I don’t want to do it. I don’t want to marry Prince Wakatoshi.”  

“I will write to Crown Prince Yuuji and ask him to retract the offer.”

“How would that help?” Runa sounded the closest to hysterical Katsumichi had ever heard her. “If he does as you ask won’t that make us look disorganised and weak?” She breathed past a sob, her shoulders heaving with the effort of composure as she glared down at her brother. “Johzenji does not need the support of Shiratorizawa but more than that we do not need Shiratorizawa to know that the king is about to die.”

She was right. Crown Prince Yuuji was doing his best but the King of Johzenji was a well-loved man. The people of the kingdom had faith in him. Convincing the people of the kingdom that he was still alive was not only for the peace of the kingdom. He had still been around during the time before the peace, he had been the one to fight off threats to the region and signed treaties and made agreements with the monarchs of Niiyama, Shiratorizawa, Karasuno, and, before they had been disgraced, Aoba Johsai. It was good to maintain the illusion that all was well while the others lived.

It could have been superstition or a genuine concern, but the king of Johzenji dying first could have indicated a weakness in the kingdom. Crown Prince Yuuji was determined to allay such a revelation at least until another of the old kings succumbed to time. There were rumours that the elderly King of Karasuno was unwell, possibly even suffering from a similar ailment to their father, but the sudden spate of marriages with Date and Aoba Johsai could potentially strengthen them beyond the reach of both Shiratorizawa and Johzenji combined.

Karasuno were easily able to proactively strengthen their position. It was a family of many children so despite the lack of wealth in the kingdom it was easy to gain more. Johzenji had to settle for being quietly consistent, maintaining the status quo and hoping that it was enough. 

It was a difficult thing to navigate but Katsumichi didn’t want Runa to have to marry Prince Wakatoshi either.

“Did you tell Prince Tsutomu anything about the situation in Johzenji?”

“I am no idiot,” She hissed. “I just let him talk about whatever he wanted to. I already told you that he is ambitious. I would never tell him something that could be used against us.”

“Do you like him or not?”

“Of course I do!” Runa exclaimed as though she was just as frustrated and confused as Katsumichi was by not being able to understand things. “Sometimes I think he is a bit of an idiot, but he is a good person.”

“But you don’t trust him,” Katsumichi said. Runa looked cross, her puffy eyes drying up and her lower lip jutting out.

“Can you say that you trust Prince Taichi?”

“Of course I can.”

“Ah, Crown Prince Yuuji was right,” Runa said, “You really are the embodiment of our kingdom. You cannot tell a lie to save your life.” 

Runa left not long afterwards and Katsumichi drifted off to sleep. He was not lying; he did trust Prince Taichi. He was difficult to speak to much of the time and he was not particularly expressive or forthcoming with any thoughts other than his desire to copulate, but Katsumichi knew what he needed to know. Prince Taichi’s dream was a small one, to have his own tiny household where his biggest responsibility was to organise to repair the roofing on a local’s home in between peacefully collecting taxes.

Katsumichi did not need to worry about trusting Prince Taichi because he was so averse to the sort of lifestyle he had been raised for.

At some point he was aware of being manhandled and the cool dampness of washcloths against his clammy skin. When he woke again to expel the meagre contents of his stomach, thankful that his body hadn’t attempted the act while he was in a deeper sleep and much more likely to choke to death, it was dark. There was another person in the room. The tall _ebisu_ on the person’s head suggested it was probably a man.

There was somebody else that Katsumichi only realised was present when he sat up from leaning over the bowl. He dabbed at his lips with his sleeve and the second person, the one he hadn’t noticed cleared their throat.

“I brought you fresh water.”

“Prince Taichi?” A familiar hand reached for his and pressed a cup into his palm. That identified one person but there was still the mystery of the person standing against the far wall. Possibly a guard if Prince Taichi was officially being detained but their presence wasn’t something that calmed Katsumichi. He brought the cup to his lips and drained the glass of water, the coldness of it getting right into his teeth but it was a much better sensation than the dry stickiness of his mouth.

“I will find them soon, whoever it was that did this to you,” Prince Taichi said.

“So you decided that it was not Princess Runa after all?”

Katsumichi wished he could see Prince Taichi squirm at that. He must have known it was a stupid thing to even consider. At least the length of silence revealed that he definitely knew it after the fact. He took the empty cup from Katsumichi and said, “I had to be sure.”

“I could have told you that it was not my sister.”

“The point was that you couldn’t,” Prince Taichi muttered. He was much more expressive in the dark. All Katsumichi could see was the vague outline of him but his voice was pushed out of his mouth by a childish pout and it was nice, to think of him as a person who was easier to see in the dark. Prince Taichi went on, still petulant, “I was afraid, Prince Katsumichi, that I would never get to see you again. How would I have gone on with my life knowing that I would never hear your voice or hold your hands?”

It was all very romantic. Katsumichi listened but the other person in the room did not make a single sound aside from the steady exhale of ennui. Katsumichi would not be allowed a private conversation with Prince Taichi, not yet. The slightest whisper would be audible in the dead silence of the night and this all seemed intentional on the part of Prince Taichi’s gaoler.

He reached for Prince Taichi’s hand, certain that such an action would be visible through their silhouettes.   

“How many days was it that I had deprived you of my heart?”

“Too many days,” Prince Taichi replied heavily. If he went too far with this they would surely get caught out, but it was fun to pretend. “Had I been made to live much longer without you I surely would have died from the fissures in my heart.”

“Never again will I allow this to occur,” Katsumichi said. “From this day forth I shall subsist only on your love, Prince Taichi, and in return we will never be parted for even another hour.”

“It is a great shame that Prince Taichi still needs to reflect,” the other person in the room said. They had a familiar voice but only in the sense that Katsumichi had heard it in passing a few times. “I do not believe we have properly met, Fourth Prince of the Virtuous Kingdom of Johzenji. I am Third Prince Eita of the Fearsome Kingdom of Shiratorizawa. It is nice to meet you.”

“And you,” Katsumichi said, instantly on edge. Prince Taichi squeezed at his hand in a way that was supposed to be reassuring. It mostly worked but Katsumichi did not quite understand what was going on.

“It is a shame that we could not have met under happier circumstances,” Prince Eita sighed. He remained standing at the far wall. It was difficult to tell because Prince Eita was practically a stranger but he did not sound sincere. “I must ask your opinion on a certain matter; why would somebody poison you?”

“It was an accident,” Katsumichi said. Despite Runa’s more logical reasoning that it could not possibly have been an accident it seemed prudent to speak with caution.

“An accident that there was poison present, or an accident that you ate it?”

Prince Taichi squeezed Katsumichi’s hand tightly enough for the bones of his hand to ache. Even in the dark the intent was obvious.

“I didn’t bring poison to Shiratorizawa.”

“I never said that you brought it with you. I wonder who did bring it though,” Prince Eita said with another sigh.

“I wonder about that too,” Katsumichi said steadily.

Prince Eita moved closer, slowly and Katsumichi was glad of Prince Taichi’s hand anchoring his own. Prince Eita did not stop until he was equidistant to Prince Taichi on Katsumichi’s other side. Thankfully, Prince Eita did not take his hand.  

“Another question, if you would be willing to answer it,” Prince Eita said amicably. “Why would somebody poison any of the people present at Crown Prince Jin’s birthday celebration?”

It was a good question. The obvious answer would be to kill one of the princes. But Katsumichi didn’t think that was what Prince Eita wanted to hear. He would know something as obvious as that. Prince Eita was wheedling for something.

Katsumichi sat up marginally straighter. He said, “To scare you.”

Even in the dark, Prince Eita’s grin was obvious.

 

 

Katsumichi didn’t see Prince Taichi again for a few days. He was still ‘reflecting’ apparently, though Eri was very vague about the details of the reflection. Runa visited a few times over the following days, asking whether he was feeling any better, asking whether he really thought staying in Shiratorizawa was the right decision. It was the same thing each time, except for the time when she brought Prince Tsutomu with her.

“Fourth Prince Katsumichi of Johzenji, it is nice to see you well.”

Katsumichi did feel much better than he had in the past week. He wasn’t constantly weighed down by a headache and the gnawing pain in his stomach had reduced to an occasional roiling when he was about to gag. He would not say that he felt particularly well. He hadn’t even attempted to stand for longer than it took to go to the toilet. At this point, toileting was done by squatting over an old bucket because he could not even toddle far enough to use the actual toilets in this wing of the palace.

He did not feel well, but Prince Tsutomu wouldn’t want to know the finer details of the situation.

“It is a surprise to see you here, Prince Tsutomu, but I am glad of you accompanying Princess Runa today,” Katsumichi said. Runa smiled brightly up at the prince sitting beside her and then at Katsumichi. It was odd for her smile to take on a steely glint at a time like this because he had done nothing to warrant a warning. Unless that was the point. He added, “I am only sorry that I cannot be a better host.”

“Please do not worry about anything like that, Prince Katsumichi. Your health is as important to the Kingdom of Shiratorizawa as it is to the Kingdom of Johzenji,” Prince Tsutomu bowed his head.

“We are all lucky that it was not either of you who ingested the poison,” Katsumichi said.

Prince Tsutomu gaped for a moment before shaking his head. “I am sorry that you had to make such a sacrifice. I am certain it was the love of Princess Runa that aided your recovery.”

“So I can assume that had it been you, you would have made an even speedier recovery?”

“Ah, no… I… I could only hope for such a happy thing. I-if there was a possibility that… Please forgive me, I am just a bit nervous.”

On the surface, Prince Tsutomu would have no business being nervous. Runa would soon be a married woman – to his brother no less – so they were nothing more than a man and a woman who often went on walks together. But the pair of them were obvious about the truth of the matter. Katsumichi was certain he would be able to tell even if Runa hadn’t told him how she felt about Prince Tsutomu, that he was a good person.

“Prince Tsutomu, why don’t you ask Prince Wakatoshi to reject the marriage offer?”

Prince Tsutomu gasped and shook his head. “I could not possibly ask such a thing of the Second Prince.”

“What will you do when they are married? Will you remain friends with Princess Runa?”

“Would you want to be friends?” Prince Tsutomu asked. His tone of voice suggested he genuinely did not know the answer. It was sort of cute how clueless Prince Tsutomu was. Katsumichi could admit that he was naïve about some things but to not know that he was liked at this point seemed too ignorant.

Runa pouted slightly as she stared back at him in reproach. “Of course I would want to be friends. You are very dear to me, Prince Tsutomu.”

But Katsumichi doubted that would be enough. The pair of them were blushing and avoiding each other’s gaze at times and then giving each other looks that made Katsumichi wonder why they had bothered visiting him anyway. Unless that was the point. He did not want to ask how true his suspicions rang but this might have been a legitimate way for them to meet now that the arrangements were being made for Runa to marry Prince Wakatoshi.

Katsumichi could not be surprised when he was shaken awake in the early hours of the next morning, before even the sun had begun to rise. It was not Yukie, nor was it Eri, nor was it Kaori. Runa was sucking in shuddering breaths, the violence of her exhales spraying Katsumichi in hot droplets of tears and spittle. Her hands were frantic as she shook him and even as he wrapped his arms around her it seemed that she was getting worse.

“I can’t do it, _Aniue_ , I can’t marry Prince Wakatoshi.”

“Runa, it’s alright.”

She shook her head quickly against Katsumichi’s neck, her tears rolling down the skin beneath his hem. “I thought I could do this for the good of Johzenji but… If I have to be stuck here with this family, I can’t do it married to that man.”

“Runa, you know as well as I do that you have to do it. You were the one who told me it would be a bad idea to back out on our side,” Katsumichi said. He hoped his voice sounded level. He needed to be a calming force here to withstand the pressure of Runa’s hands fisted in the front of his _yukata_.

“ _Aniue_! I need… Fifth Child and Second Prince of the Virtuous Kingdom of Johzenji, Prince Katsumichi, I have come to beg of your help,” Runa mumbled as she stiffly loosened her fingers from Katsumichi’s chest and pushed herself back to lower into _dogeza_.

“Runa.”

“I ask your protection for myself, Ninth Child and Second Princess of the Virtuous Kingdom of Johzenji and Thirteenth Child and Eighth Prince of the Fearsome Kingdom of Shiratorizawa, Prince Tsutomu.” Runa lifted her face, the streaks of tears glistening against the brilliant rouge of her cheeks. She sniffed loudly but the thick glistening from her nose, over her trembling lips, and stretching to her chin, did nothing more than catch the light with the great rattles of her lungs. “I can’t stay here. I can’t pretend that things will be alright if I marry Prince Wakatoshi because I don’t like him. I really don’t like him. I am going to run from this place.”

“You don’t have to–”

“There is no other way for my freedom. If I stay I must marry him and I won’t do it, _Aniue_ , I really won’t. I just beg your blessing for my travels. And… and when they find me, please see if you can afford me some mercy for my crime.”

“Runa, it’s not–”

The words wouldn’t come out. Personal feelings aside, disobedience was a crime, especially at this level. To converse with kings, the rulers who wielded absolute power over thousands of people on behalf of the gods, was an honour that was bestowed upon them all for the serendipity of their birth. It was no trifling matter to disobey the best interests of the people, the words of the gods.

But what did gods and kings know about this? What qualified them to have Runa begging mercy for something that surely must have been allowed for those who did not have such noble fortunes?

But their birth right was such in name only. It was a privilege and nothing more than that. Every single one of them had to earn their place and appease the hearts of the gods and kings alike. Prince Taichi did not seem to understand, wishing to avoid the ambitions that high birth had offered him but not seeking freedom deeply enough to earn the threads across his spine or the scraps of food that would never suffice to fill his stomach. Runa understood it well enough to beg like this just for a chance that could even see her die before she found a proper way to survive.

Katsumichi reached for her, spread himself over her back and clung to her as tightly as she had to him just moments before.  

“Please don’t leave me.”

“Even if you are not allowed to offer me any public support, forgive me in your heart,” Runa whispered. “That will be enough.”


	9. The Favour

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Princess Runa runs away from a match with Prince Wakatoshi, Prince Katsumichi must ask for help to have her pardoned.

Runa really did go.

He did not learn of it until the evening when Eri came to him with a jug of water and a small bowl of rice porridge. She was quiet for a while, watching as Katsumichi blew at a spoonful of _okayu_ and barely tasted the corners of the spoonful with cautious lips. She was patient until he had truly eaten a bit before she announced that she had some news.

“Princess Runa is missing,” She said quietly. She must have known that Runa had come to see him that morning because her face was carefully blank following the statement. Katsumichi could not say he was entirely skilled at subterfuge but this was just a small lie. He had considered the fact that she might really run but he had hoped against it. He was still channelling that hope.

“Is anybody out looking for her?”

“There are some people,” Eri allowed. “They are also searching for Prince Tsutomu. There have been some suggestions that the two of them fled together. The situation is grave considering it was not that long ago that it was announced Princess Runa would marry Prince Wakatoshi.”

“I don’t see how the disappearances of the pair of them are in any way related.”

“They are friends.”

“I do not think it possible that the two of them struck any genuine friendship with one another. Perhaps it was the mutual tuition of sword fighting and sailing that brought them together but neither of those are activities that should be engaged in on an escape from a kingdom with as many resources as Shiratorizawa.”

Eri looked relieved, strangely. She could hear well how aloof Katsumichi was being but she must also have known that regardless of his words, Runa and Prince Tsutomu had run away together. Anybody could see that to be true. She left with a small smile and a bow and Katsumichi had to wonder whether Prince Eita had offered her something for her assistance or whether there was a ransom that he was ignorant to.  

It was not until later that afternoon that Prince Taichi came to visit. He was alone and this was the first time they had properly seen each other since Prince Taichi swam out of focus as a result of the poison.

“How do you feel?” Prince Taichi asked.

Katsumichi shrugged. He was finally outside again, sitting in the open doorways and still squinting against daylight. The royal doctor was pleased with the state of his health, and there did not seem to be much damage done by the poison. He was still chewing on one of the orange tree twigs that he had been collecting over the past few days. Kaori had scolded him when she first saw that he hadn’t been using them and he had stupidly decided that cleaning his teeth was useless when any exhale could have been followed by another surge of sickliness.

He leaned back against the wooden frame beside him and looked over at Prince Taichi. He certainly looked as though he had been reflecting hard and it was doubtful that he needed to hear anything worrisome.

“I feel much better, thank you, Prince Taichi,” Katsumichi said.

“Is that so?”

“I’m glad that you can move about freely now.”

Prince Taichi blinked a few times a sighed, sagging against the frame at the other side of the open _fusuma_. “I believe Prince Eita would have preferred me reflect longer on my crimes, but I was shown some mercy. Two people close to us have mysteriously disappeared. Our hearts must be aching and we should be allowed to support and comfort each other in a time such as this.”

“Is that what this is supposed to be? We have conjugal privileges? When will they expect you to return?”

“When we are both thoroughly sated,” Prince Taichi smirked.

“Ah. They might be waiting for a long while in that case.”

Prince Taichi pressed the heels of his hands into the sockets of his eyes and he shook his head, looking bleary when he removed his hands to look at Katsumichi again. He groaned quietly. “I wish things were easier. I really was able to think while I was stuck being watched every minute of the day. I shouldn’t have expected the both of us to settle into the type of marriage I had been dreaming about. We hardly know one another and it is difficult because our home is in an unfamiliar place – more so for you than me. We should be more sensitive towards one another.”

Katsumichi wondered when it had been that he was being insensitive to Prince Taichi. He ahd been trying his best since he came to live in Shiratorizawa, though he knew that there was always a chance others could have done a better job than he did. Katsumichi had been trying all along and he hadn’t seen much from Prince Taichi aside from a grand effort to avoid him. If it took a near-death experience to make Prince Taichi reflect it might have been better for him to have considered an angle of sensitivity long before now.

“Do you think that I am not already being sensitive towards you, Prince Taichi?”

Prince Taichi hesitated for a moment, genuine surprise splashed across his face as though the question was impossible to answer. “I didn’t say that, Prince Katsumichi.”

“What reason would you have to suggest we both start being sensitive towards each other if you didn’t think we were both being difficult and insensitive?”

“I don’t know.”

“I’m not trying to catch you out or trick you,” Katsumichi said quietly. He was still feeling too tender to get annoyed over every little thing. “Do you think that the way I have been treating you isn’t the best it could be?”

The hesitation was there again and Prince Taichi wiped his hands against his thighs. He glanced at Katsumichi a few times while contemplating his own hands. “I would like it more if you told me what would make your life easier. If you told me then I could do my best to make things more comfortable. And if you feel more comfortable and happy it might be then nice for me to tell you things that would make our life together nicer for me.”

“Why would you wait until I had demanded so much of you before doing the same yourself?”

“You nearly died, Prince Katsumichi, you certainly deserve to make many demands of me first,” Prince Taichi said with a small smile. “You could begin now, if you’d like. Tell me the first thing you can think of that would make our marriage better for you.”  

He was so tired. He had mostly slept through his days but his body was heavy and his mind was foggy. He had to focus to give Prince Taichi a hard look. “This is enough. When we return to West River we can think about how we can both try harder. But this is fine for now. You are enough.”

“Oh.” Prince Taichi turned his face away and brought his hands up to shield the back of his neck. His ears and the nape of his neck were flushed brightly. He hadn’t heard any great statement of affection, at least Katsumichi did not think he had offered one. Katsumichi was not sure whether displays like this were irritating or endearing.

“Am I enough?” Katsumichi asked, just to see what the response would be.

Still looking away, Prince Taichi nodded his head quickly. This was an even better reaction that when he used quiet barbs with his words. He spat out his orange tree twig and moved closer, shuffling slowly on his knees. Prince Taichi went still at the sound, still covering himself but the lines of his body were tense beneath reams and reams of beaten silk.

“Prince Taichi,” he said in a low voice, his breath glancing over the knuckles of the fingers that were biting into the back of his neck. “Do you believe my feelings?”

Prince Taichi nodded rapidly.

“Can I believe yours? Am I enough?”

“You really are too much,” Prince Taichi grumbled.

Katsumichi grinned at the back of Prince Taichi’s head and sat back in his original position. He picked up another of the orange tree twigs and began to chew on the end and scrubbed it against his teeth. “Can I take that as a compliment?”

“You’re going to take it as a compliment anyway, aren’t you?” He unfolded himself and glared at Katsumichi, though it seemed that there wasn’t much feeling behind it.

“Was that conjugal enough for you?”

“I think maybe it was too conjugal. Have you been married before?”

“I wonder.”

Prince Taichi looked even more flustered, the redness that had started to recede returning with a vengeance. “You’re not supposed to say something like that. You’re supposed to tell me that your heart belongs entirely to me. It is the price I charge to search for the person who attempted to claim your life.”

“Prince Taichi,” Katsumichi said quietly. “Don’t bother with something like that.”

Prince Taichi frowned. “Prince Katsumichi, I will devote myself entirely to finding the person responsible for doing this to you.”

Katsumichi shook his head. He appreciated the sentiment but he doubted anything would come of the other prince’s efforts. He had been detained before he could even begin his search and that only meant that the time had been beneficial to whoever the culprit was as they covered their tracks. It was too late to try something that could only be a waste of time.

There was something else that he wanted to request. It wasn’t a request that would make the marriage easier, or whatever Prince Taichi had been asking about, but it would certainly settle Katsumichi’s heart. He was not sure whether it would be worthwhile or it would be just as useless as searching for whoever had poisoned him. But he couldn’t do nothing. Even if he was still not physically able because he had been weakened by his illness, he still had to do whatever he could.

“May I ask a favour of you, Prince Taichi.”

“You may ask anything of me, Prince Katsumichi. I can only hope that the resolve of my heart is enough to satisfy your needs.”

“Instead of trying to help me by finding the person who poisoned me, I hope you will be able to find Runa and Prince Tsutomu.”

Prince Taichi frowned and leaned back again. He sniffed and rubbed at his nose in frustration. “Maybe we should just let them go. If I find them, wouldn’t I have to bring them back to be punished?”

“Where did this loyalty to your kingdom suddenly come from?”

Prince Taichi laughed humourlessly. “Prince Tsutomu was born on the same day as Crown prince Jin. I had always heard that Crown Prince Jin was glad to have such a fortuitous gift on his birthday. As you have probably seen, Tsutomu is not cute at all but the Crown Prince has a soft spot in his heart for him. But, obviously, we don’t have fun celebrations for Tsutomu’s birthday. His mother is not of particularly high birth but she was well liked by the king. Even so, Tsutomu has gone through some hardships. If he loves Princess Runa, I believe we should leave him at least one full day with her.”

Katsumichi had never heard his spouse speak so emotively about one of the other princes of Shiratoizawa. He wondered whether Prince Tsutomu had told Runa parts of himself like this, and whether she shared with him any of the minor slights which added up to deeper wounds.

It was as romantic as it was impractical.

“Surely a lifetime would be kinder than one day. Obviously there are soldiers searching for the pair of them already,” Katsumichi said. “If you find them you can do something to protect them.”

“Even though I am still reflecting hard over my actions.”

“You love me enough to go crazy at the thought of losing me so suddenly, don’t you?” Katsumichi asked wryly. Prince Taichi rolled his eyes so Katsumichi went on. “While the two of them are under your protection I will beg a favour from the King. He might allow me one request considering it was under his watch that I nearly died.”

“I remember you telling me that you weren’t one of the smartest among your brothers,” Prince Taichi said tiredly. “You were right about being determined, but if your brothers are truly smarter than you I fear meeting with any of them.”

 

It was the very next day that Prince Taichi left to find Princess Runa and Prince Tsutomu. He didn’t come to bid Katsumichi farewell, rather the fact was only confirmed when Yukie’s rough and careless manners were what accosted him first thing in the morning.

“Where is Eri?” Katsumichi asked, having grown accustomed to her gentle care throughout his sickness. Yukie simply grinned widely and jabbed at Katsumichi’s cheek.

“You are so cute when you pretend you don’t like me. Just admit that you missed me _properly_ taking care of you.”

Katsumichi sat up and batted away the intrusive finger only to have this finger’s relatives tugging at the hem of his _yukata_. He tugged the silk back over the bareness of his chest and smacked Yukie’s fingers away.

“This isn’t properly taking care of me. I’m still sick!” Katsumichi grumbled. He coughed for good measure despite the fact that they both knew it had nothing to do with the poison.

“Eh? You can’t be that sick,” Yukie said with a leer. She wriggled her eyebrows before lunging to dig her claws into Katsumichi’s waist. He yelped loudly and Yukie was triumphant. “See! Would a sick person be frolicking about with a dear friend and making a ruckus?”

Katsumichi rolled away, kicking out behind him but only catching the air. Yukie was still grinning but it seemed she had decided that Katsumichi was awake enough. Her kneeling seemed more proper as she folded her hands in her lap.

“He’s gone,” She said. “He took Eri with him.”

“I see.”

“I doubt they’ve run off to elope together because Prince Taichi never speaks to me except to ask me about you, but I know that he didn’t say goodbye to you, did he?” Yukie said quietly.

“He didn’t,” Katsumichi confirmed. “But I asked him to go. Runa shouldn’t have run away. Both she and Prince Tsutomu must have known that it is unlikely that they will be able to outrun soldiers.”

He had asked Runa not to leave him but she had done it anyway. Obviously, marrying Prince Wakatoshi was the exact opposite of what she wanted but it wasn’t a massive problem, the fact that she didn’t love Prince Wakatoshi. Logically it was the best solution for her to marry him. Crown Prince Jin was well-liked but the rumours of Prince Wakatoshi’s supporters trying to oust him were growing. Whether or not Prince Wakatoshi knew anything about the plans or how serious they were, he was in a very good position. Runa couldn’t have married better than him in Shiratorizawa, or even the wider Miyagi region.

She must really have liked Prince Tsutomu. Enough to risk her life to disobey the preliminary contracts that were in place for her to marry Prince Wakatoshi. Sanctions could be brought against Johzenji for Runa’s actions and at worst she could be arrested and executed as an example of why one should not cross Shiratorizawa.

Runa could ride and she could use the sword and she could even hunt, but Katsumichi doubted that would be enough to survive.

“I want Prince Taichi to save my sister.”

Yukie hummed, her expression flat. “I know Princess Runa as well as you do. She won’t need saving.”

“Not unless she gets caught. How are we to know that there are not many other soldiers out looking for her? How do we know that there aren’t soldiers on their way to Johzenji right now to challenge us for Runa’s disobedience?” Katsumichi asked.

Yukie took his futon and slid open the door, tossing the rolled-up bundle onto the wooden walkway outside the room, grumbling something about airing it out later. She helped Katsumichi to stand up and led him to the exit, supporting his unsteady body as he slipped _geta_ onto his feet.

“What you are saying sounds about right,” Yukie allowed, “And I am no politician, but I don’t think Princess Runa would do something so thoughtlessly, Prince Katsumichi.”

She was not usually a thoughtless person, Yukie was right. A great many things could make somebody turn thoughtless. Being unable to see properly as he squinted and staggered alongside Yukie made Katsumichi thoughtless. He only realised this when Yukie brought them both to a stop just a few yards down the path and bowed.

“Good morning, Prince Kenjirou,” Yukie said in the polite tone that was reserved for people who were not Katsumichi.

“Hmm? What’s this? You have some nerve to swan around the palace like this after you kidnapped my brother.”

“I’m sorry?”

“What sort of greeting is this?” Prince Kenjirou asked sharply.

“Forgive me, Prince Kenjirou, but I do not know what you mean,” Katsumichi said. He was tired and it would be too much bother to worry himself with being overly polite to a person who was already so aggressive. Enough time had passed for his eyes to adjust to the brightness that was so different when it wasn’t obscured by _washi_.

“Even now you were so brazenly discussing things that would amount to treason.” Prince Kenjirou was haughty at the best of times, or he certainly gave that impression from the most cursory of interactions, but Katsumichi wished he had known how irrational he clearly was.  

“I can’t say that I have any idea what you are talking about, Prince Kenjirou,” Katsumichi said quietly. “It wouldn’t be good to be witnessed acting in a hostile manner towards a man who almost had their life taken from them in this palace.”

Prince Kenjirou narrowed his eyes. “If you mean to say that you suspect me of trying to kill you, might you be inclined to make your spouse offer a formal apology to Prince Wakatoshi. As though a person as noble as he would attempt to kill the Crown Prince.”

“If that’s what it takes.”

Prince Kenjirou scoffed and stalked off. Yukie waited until he was properly gone before she straightened her back and narrowed her eyes at Katsumichi. “That was weak. He only let you get away with that much because of your condition.”

That was fine. Katsumichi wasn’t at Shiratorizawa to spar with Prince Kenjirou, nor any of the other princes. They hardly mattered at all. Regardless, it was irksome that Prince Kenjirou had used ‘kidnap’ to describe the situation. Nothing of the sort had taken place and Prince Tsutomu had obviously left of his own volition. He wanted to be with Runa as much as she wanted to be with him.

The pair of them continued on to the bath where every inch of his body was scrubbed until it was bright red and raw.

“Are you angry at me, Yukie?” Katsumichi asked. It seemed prudent to make sure that they were still on good terms considering how many layers of his skin had been desquamated.

“Of course not, _Denka._ In fact, I am very pleased with your current condition.” Yukie was gentle as she knelt at his feet and rubbed between his toes. “How could I ever be angry at you?”

“I am quite certain that you often get angry with me.”

Yukie grinned, wide and goofy just like she always used to. “ _Denka_ , my sweet, precious _Denka_ ,” She cooed right before tickling at the sole of Katsumichi’s feet and not relenting until his surprised squeals dissolved and he had resorted to kicking out at her.

She rose to her feet and moved to the _ofuro_ to remove the wooden lid. Steam danced up from the surface of the water and the scent emanating from it was heavy and calming. Yukie assisted Katsumichi make his way over to the o _furo_ and she was patient enough to help him step inside so that he could sit down. When he was settled, he said, “I’m sorry, Yukie, that you have had to be my servant all this time.”

Yukie was sitting on a stool beside the _ofuro_ and been staring into space. It was something she had perfected so it seemed that she was an attentive servant but it allowed her mind to drift. She peered at Katsumichi curiously.

“It isn’t your fault, Prince Katsumichi, you were a child. Would you have preferred I was your sister? Or your spouse?”

“Is it really fair that a person of high birth must lower themselves in this way?” Katsumichi grumbled.

Yukie scooped some water into her hands and flicked it at Katsumichi’s face.

“I think I can truly say there is no difference between those of high and low birth aside from how bratty and inconsiderate people like you are. People like us,” Yukie corrected. “But do you not agree that me being used to trade for protection and has been good for both of our families? Princess Hana is probably enjoying a more comfortable life than I am seeing as she is married highly into the Fukurodani families but I doubt a second of her day passes where she isn’t worried about offending and upsetting them. Whereas I am a good enough hostage and I made some good friends in Johzenji.” Her fingertips continued to trail in the water, small ripples following the sway of her hands. She smiled softly. “To be honest, I think I have made some even better friends in Shiratorizawa.”

Yukie had always been a cheerful girl, usually more boisterous that most of the people who resided within palace grounds and at times Katsumichi hardly believed she had been born to a noble family in the west.

As a child, when she first arrived in Johzenji she had been very reserved and mostly kept herself to herself as she studied under the more senior servants at the palace. Katsumichi was not sure when it happened but there was a change and she revealed herself to be a person who would push a prince into a pond and eat his lunch, claiming that the untouched meal was already leftovers.

“So you like your position?” Katsumichi hazarded. True, the lifestyle seemed to suit her once she had become used to the place she had been sent to, but she surely had some regrets.

“Sometimes I would like to be able to speak on the same level as royals but my life feels more honest this way,” Yukie shrugged. She submerged her hand and pushed lower until her entire forearm was in the water. Katsumichi squirmed out of the way.

“Where do you think you’re touching?”

“Nowhere, D _enka_ ,” She said with a sloppy grin and a roll of her eyes. “Is the temperature fine for you?”

“Of course it is fine,” Katsumichi said. Yukie was still grinning as she withdrew her arm and shook it about in the air. She folded her arms over the rim of the _ofuro_ and rested her head on her forearms with a sigh.

“I heard that once, you met Prince Wakatoshi in the bath.”

“You were there,” Katsumichi grumbled. Yukie’s grin only widened.

“Are you talking about the time when he came to visit West River? No, I mean I heard that you met him in the bath here at the main palace.”

“I did.”

“From what I heard, Prince Taichi didn’t like that very much. After accusing Prince Wakatoshi so publically of being involved in your poisoning, I get the feeling that your spouse is not fond of the Second prince.”

Katsumichi also had that impression, though it was usually because Prince Taichi tended to wax poetic about what a noble and valiant person the Crown Prince was. He had never said anything of the sort about Prince Wakatoshi aside from mentioning that other people liked him. At some point there had been an implication that Prince Taichi did not like Prince Wakatoshi at all, and Katsumichi wondered whether that had coloured his opinion of the man.

If his spouse did not like his own brother, it seemed obvious to not want his sister to marry the man. Runa’s own defiance had been answer enough for Katsumichi but he had hoped to be able to change things without anybody resorting to things like running away.

“I’m not particularly fond of Prince Wakatoshi either.”

Yukie grinned at him.

 

After finally feeling clean and relaxed, Katsumichi went to request an audience with the King. His steps were slow and he had to stop a few times to catch his breath. It was ridiculous how just a few days of illness had him struggling to walk the way he was used to. Yukie followed along asking what the King was like in person. Katsumichi had found it difficult to comment, mostly because he did not want to be heard saying that the King was not a nice person. He grumbled vaguely and he was certain that Yukie was pulling faces behind him as she told him he was no fun.

Luckily she stopped pulling face when they finally reached the main hall. The guards at the door eyed him with suspicion. He stopped before them and smiled as pleasantly as he could.

“Fifth Child and Fourth Prince of the Virtuous Kingdom of Johzenji, Prince Katsumichi would like to request an audience with the King of the Fearsome Kingdom of Shiratorizawa.”

“The king is busy,” One of the guards said, their partner glancing from the corner of their eye.

“It is a matter of urgency,” Katsumichi said calmly.

The first guard sneered and Katsumichi wondered what he had missed in his time of respite. “Do you have information pertaining to the location or plans of a traitor to the kingdom?”

“No.”

“Then it is not urgent. The King is busy.”

Katsumichi took a deep breath. He tried to convince himself that there was no point in getting worked up about this but he needed to speak with the king as soon as possible. He needed to do whatever he could to save his sister and Prince Tsutomu. He needed to do something useful. “Busy he may be, but would you not agree that most things are matters of urgency when one’s life is in danger? For example, if one had been poisoned within the _very safe_ palace grounds of the Fearsome Kingdom of Shiratorizawa, one might have to inform the Virtuous Kingdom of Johzenji that they have been betrayed by duplicitous rats. Would you not agree?”

The guards both narrowed their eyes. “The king is busy.”

“Ah, I understand,” Katsumichi said with his most radiant smile. “My father’s heart will be heavy to learn that I am no longer welcome in the kingdom of my spouse.”

He turned to leave and walked right into Prince Wakatoshi. Katsumichi still had not eaten yet so that explained the vaguely dazed sensation he had moments after the collision as he blinked himself back to lucidity. He heard Yukie and glared at her over his shoulder. He wondered whether the pair of them had somehow summoned Prince Wakatoshi by expressing dislike for him. A very illogical part of Katsumichi wondered whether Prince Wakatoshi knew what had been said about him. Those concerns were put to bed when Prince Wakatoshi spoke.

“Are you alright?”

“Yes, I’m fine, thank you, Prince Wakatoshi.”

“You should be more careful,” Prince Wakatoshi said. It was true but hearing that did not make Katsumichi happy at all.

“I will be more careful in future.”

Prince Wakatoshi nodded thoughtfully as though the words needed any consideration. This was even more awkward than the time they had met in the bath. Yukie gave Katsumichi a significant glare and he had to turn his shrug into a redundant shake of his arms at his sides when Prince Wakatoshi looked back down at him.

“You must be finding it hard to be without Prince Taichi. Do you know why he left this morning?”

“I told him to,” Katsumichi said.

“Why would you do that?”

“I requested that he search for Princess Runa and Prince Tsutomu,” Katsumichi replied, not even sure what else the answer could have been. Prince Wakatoshi’s brow was furrowed.

“But why?”

Katsumichi was not sure why he had to keep explaining this to people. It made sense to him and Prince Taichi had agreed to it, meaning it can’t have been entirely illogical. It was a sensible plan to Katsumichi. “I want Prince Taichi to find them before any of the soldiers do so that they have some political protection before they are arrested.”

“You are aware that Taichi is also in trouble.”

“Yes! But I could hardly have asked you, could I?”

“You could have,” Prince Wakatoshi said. Katsumichi must have looked as nonplussed as he felt because the other prince went on, “Tsutomu is a very dear brother to me, and I am betrothed to Princess Runa.”

“Oh.” Katsumichi was seriously considering asking Prince Wakatoshi to go. If he would volunteer to carelessly it only made sense to ask him. More help would be better but it probably was not the best idea to send him off after Prince Taichi had already left for the task. Bringing somebody else into the situation would probably inflame things. There was something else he could ask of Prince Wakatoshi though.

Katsumichi quickly dropped into _dogeza_ and hissed for Yukie to do the same. She was much more lethargic as she moved which was annoying because she was not the one recovering from an attempted assassination. That was a problem for another time.

“Second Child and Second Prince Wakatoshi of the Fearsome Kingdom of Shiratorizawa, I beg your assistance.”

For some reason, Prince Wakatoshi took that to mean Katsumichi wanted him to kneel in front of him. That was obviously not the goal and Katsumichi prickled.

“What is it that you require?”

“I request that you do not marry Princess Runa.”

“Why not?”

“Prince Wakatoshi, she ran away because she does not want to marry you. I know that as children of royal houses we have no business defying the wishes of our kings and superiors, but this is one thing that I must ask. If she were to marry into this kingdom at all, I am certain that Princess Runa would choose Prince Tsutomu.”

Prince Wakatoshi nudged at Katsumichi’s shoulder so he sat up straight to look directly at the frown on Prince Wakatoshi’s face.

“Why would she choose him? He is of lower birth than I am. Surely I would be the best candidate.”

He was an idiot. He must have been. Despite being at the West River Estate when Princess Runa and Prince Tsutomu first began rowing boats on the river and flying kites on open ground together, Prince Wakatoshi must have been an idiot. Or unobservant. Or thick-headed. The things he was saying were true but they were not the deciding factors of the situation.

“Prince Wakatoshi, please understand,” Katsumichi implored. “As far as I know, Princess Runa loves Prince Tsutomu, that is why she would choose him.”

“Love?”

Prince Wakatoshi looked genuinely confused and Katsumichi felt his annoyance double. How could someone be so ignorant as to not understand this? It was so simple.

“Prince Katsumichi, do you love Prince Taichi?”

Katsumichi hesitated. He was growing fond of Prince Taichi. He enjoyed spending time with him and found that speaking with him was more and more interesting as time went on. It was not yet love. Probably. Katsumichi didn’t like to compare this level of fondness to the similar feeling he had experienced so many years before – he thought of things a bit differently to the time he had thought mingling with the common citizens of the kingdom was some grand adventure. Because of his reservations about decisively naming his feelings, even if he had no problems making comparisons, Katsumichi couldn’t have been sure that his heart was currently as affected as it had been in the past.

“Of course I do,” He finally said. “We have been married for some months now and the feelings we have cultivated have only grown since our union.”

“Did you love him before you married him?” Prince Wakatoshi asked. He held up a hand and then corrected. “Did you marry him because you loved him?”

“I married him because it was for the good of our two kingdoms.”

“I see. So you married first and then the feelings came afterwards?” Prince Wakatoshi clarified. Katsumichi nodded slowly and Prince Wakatoshi’s face hardened. “Surely if Princess Runa married me for the good of our two kingdoms, we too could cultivate feelings of love?”

Katsumichi quickly shook his head. “Not if she loves Prince Tsutomu. It would be impossible.”

Prince Wakatoshi looked thoughtful yet again. He stood and offered a hand for Katsumicihi to take. He stood and Yukie grumbled and dusted off her _kosode_ while narrowing her eyes at the two princes.

Katsumichi quickly withdrew his hand and asked, “Would you please consider refusing Princess Runa for marriage?”

“Even if I consider it, what would Johzenji say?”

“I would deal with them,” Katsumichi said firmly. “Please consider it.”

“Have you spoken about this with the King?” Prince Wakatoshi asked.

“The victim of poison from another kingdom is not worthy of seeking out the King, or so it seems,” Katsumichi said.

Prince Wakatoshi looked taken aback and Katsumichi had to wonder whether he had any right to look that way. He closed his mouth and set his face determinedly and said, “I will speak with him.”

Prince Wakatoshi approached the guards easily and was let through to the main hall without so much as a flicker of an eyelid in his direction. It seemed the King really was busy – ignoring the links with Johzenji. Katsumichi could not help but notice Yukie’s scowl and wondered whether they were thinking the same thing.

Some show of consideration to a person who was harmed under the care of the King would be normal. Katsumichi’s brow furrowed. Johzenji were definitely being looked down upon.


	10. The Heroic Kingdom of Karasuno

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prince Katsumichi, accompanied by Yukie and Kaori, must venture to Johzenji in order to have them agree to dissolve Princess Runa's engagement.

Yukie sighed heavily for the umpteenth time as she packed a saddle bag. Katsumichi could see no reason for her to have a heavy heart considering Kaori was rolling her eyes at each exaggerated exhale while she packed her own bag.

Kaori had been kind enough to distribute rations of dried meat and fruit in little packs that had been tied with delicate ribbons. It was a nice touch but initially Katsumichi had taken it to mean that he would be going alone. Thankfully he was able to witness Kaori give one to a grumbling Yukie before she held up the rations she had allocated for herself.

“Do we really have to go now?” Yukie asked on the back of another sigh.

Katsumichi never did get his audience with the King but Prince Wakatoshi had reported to him within three days. The King had asked why such a request would be made when it was so disadvantageous to Johzenji but that was the closest to a dialogue with the King that Katsumichi would get. It did not matter too much because the King had allowed it and there was some snide comment made about Prince Wakatoshi having the option to marry a better-suited family.

Katsumichi did not need to bother himself with pettiness like that. He knew that his family and his kingdom were more than respectable enough. What he did need to bother with was securing the approval of Johzenji. He doubted that Anabara would be completely pleased with the change in plans but the politics of the matter were secondary to Runa’s happiness.

Time was of the essence and waiting around before journeying to Johzenji was not going to help matters.

“Of course we have to leave now.”

Katsumichi was surprised by Kaori’s vehemence as she spoke. He was thankful for the sentiment but rather confused as to why she took the words from his mouth. Kaori’s expression softened when she noticed that Katsumichi was looking at her as startled as Yukie was.

“Just as it wasn’t good that Princess Runa and Prince Tsutomu ran away in the first place, it won’t be good if plans change without Johzenji finding out. Obviously the King is writing a notice to send over but wouldn’t it be better coming from Prince Katsumichi first. And then he could also ask to secure leniency from Johzenji for the two runaways.” That was unexpected to hear but essentially it was the reason Katsumichi wanted to leave as soon as possible. Kaori, as composed as ever, winked at Katsumichi. “Are you surprised, _Denka_?”

“A little bit.”

Yukie jumped up from her crouch on the floor and stretched her arms into the air with a loud wail. “How about now, _Denka_?”

“Not very much,” Katsumichi said.

Yukie only huffed in response. And stalked over to kick at the bag that Katsumichi was checking through. “I only heard that the royal doctor said the danger from the poison had passed. I did not know that he had approved you to go gallivanting off to another kingdom after not eating food for over a week.”

“I’m a prince, Yukie. This body must make sacrifices for the lives of my people,” Katsumichi said hoping that he sounded impressive and noble. He probably didn’t because Yukie scoffed and sneered in Kaori’s direction.

“Do you think he will remember he said this when he’s collapsed in the middle of nowhere, faint with exhaustion?”

The thing was, Katsumichi did remember saying that. The memory clawed back into his consciousness as he felt the earth shift beneath him and his stomach swooped. He only realised that he had actually fallen when he felt the impact of the rain-hardened ground and the crack of a tree root in the back of his skull.

 

“ _Denka?_ ”

Katsumichi squeezed at the fingers that were twined at his before he opened his eyes. His head felt thick and heavy. Yukie pushed him back down before he could sit up but there was no doubt his attempt would have failed regardless. She released his fingers and he rubbed at his eyes.

“What happened?”

“We haven’t quite made it to Johzenji yet,” She said quietly.

Katsumichi blinked at the wooden planks of the ceiling. Firelight flickered in the room and on the wall Katsumichi was lying against, he could see himself and Yukie’s figure crouching over him. There were some vaguer shadows further along the _washi_ wall that could have been inside or outside, but Katsumichi’s eyes could not properly focus on them.

“Where are we?”

Yukie hesitated. There were prominent bags under her eyes and she looked exhausted. Surely one day’s travel hadn’t affected her that much. She licked her lips and whispered, “I think we are closer to Karasuno than any of the other kingdoms.”

That was not good news. Before Katsumichi could say anything, Yukie began to stand. “I will fetch Kaori and some water for you to drink.”

Katsumichi had not been mistaken about other shadows in the room because as Yukie was leaving he heard some murmuring. The fire crackled and there seemed to be a pot boiling above it. That was all Katsumichi could hear. It might have been worth turning his head to see but he did not particularly want to be confronted with the current situation as yet.

Karasuno was to the north of Shiratorizawa’s lands so it wasn’t entirely unusual that they would be within the Karasuno borders. There was something hesitant about Yukie as she had spoken. Their course must have deviated somewhat from the original plan. Their route should not have taken them into Karasuno proper, but they should have skirted around the lands via the border it shared with Date. They would have had to make their way through Niiyama’s territories afterwards before reaching Johzenji.  

The structure was a strange one to wake up inside. It seemed like a giant lantern and the unusual architecture only heightened the concern that was gripping the emptiness of Katsumichi’s stomach.

Above him all he could see were the uniform planks of the ceiling. He threw caution to the wind and turned his head in the direction that Yukie had disappeared. As he had heard there was a boiling pot over a small fire. Thin smoke was rising around the bottom of the suspended pot and reaching towards a chimney that extended down into the room. Beside that, lit by the fire was a woman crouched with her arms crossed over her knees as she squinted across the room at Katsumichi.

He had obviously been seen so the only thing to do was to offer a greeting. He sat up, slowly, taking a moment to let his mind settle when he was finally vertical. He kneeled as best he could, finding himself uselessly tangled in a sheet that had been thrown over his lower body.

“The Fifth Child and Fourth Prince of Johzenji, Prince Katsumichi thanks you for the hospitality that you have shown.”

The woman bowed her head slightly and said, “Fourth of the Restorative Kingdom of Niiyama, Princess Kanoka.”

That confused matters. Katsumichi was certain he had met at least a few of the princesses of Niiyama, but this woman was not familiar. Her style of dress was not typical of a court lady – she was wearing a modest, black _kosode_ with wide-legged _hakamashita_ tightened at her waist over the top of it and her hair was tied up and away from her face. The boots on her feet were caked with mud. It didn’t fit. The _washi_ walls and the _tatami_ floor and a princess wearing muddy boots.

“Princess Kanoka,” Katsumichi said quietly. “Might I ask where we are?”

“We are on the grounds of an old noble house. It is currently within Karasuno’s territory. It used to belong to my mother’s family a long time ago,” Princess Kanoka said.

“Oh. What happened for me to end up here?”

Princess Kanoka gave Katsumichi a long look. She said, “I think it would be better if your companions explained that to you.”

That seemed to be that and Princess Kanoka remained by the fire, wordless. Katsumichi was thankful that he did not need to wait too long for Yukie’s return. Kaori followed along slowly. They both bowed to Princess Kanoka and Yukie murmured something to her before they approached Katsumichi.

The pair of them kneeled before Katsumichi and Kaori placed an old cup and a jug of water on the _tatami_ between them. Her hands were steady in the most careful way as she poured water into the cup. She bowed and offered it to Katsumichi. He drank quickly and thanked them both.

It felt odd to be here, wherever here really was, with Princess Kanoka staring from the far side of the room. He gestured for Kaori and Yukie to lean in closer and he lowered his voice as he asked, “What is going on?”

“You should have just listened to me, that’s what,” Yukie grumbled.

“Okay, so I shouldn’t have tried to travel anywhere without eating anything,” Katsumichi retorted. Yukie frowned and exchanged a look with Kaori. He didn’t particularly like being in the dark so he asked, “What does that mean? Why are you looking at each other like that?”

“I meant you should have listened to me about the direction we took,” Yukie said, still frowning. “You started arguing with Kaori and I, and you suddenly said you needed to be sick. You dismounted your horse and then walked right off the edge of a cliff.”

That didn’t sound like anything that Katsumichi could remember. He remembered leaving and hoping it would not take too long to reach Johzenji. Walking off the edge of a cliff sounded like something that one would probably remember doing. Unless they hit their head hard enough. “Kaori, when did this happen?”

“Why aren’t you asking me?” Yukie protested.

“Two days ago, _Denka_ ,” Kaori said.

Katsumichi couldn’t speak. He was losing so much of his life lately without even knowing. It was not a good feeling, being uncertain of his days. He had fallen two days ago and likely been unconscious since then. But he didn’t remember anything that happened before that so there was no guarantee that it was only two days that he had lost here. He was too afraid to ask, too afraid to hear that they had travelled for a week already and still not made it to Johzenji.

“I’m not a very good prince, am I?” Katsumichi asked.

“If you think I will try to make you feel better about yourself, you are sorely mistaken,” Yukie said quietly. She placed a hand at the nape of Katsumichi’s neck and pressed her forehead to his. “But you are doing everything that you can to try to help the people you care about, and that is a good quality to have. I respect you for that, _Denka_.”

“For all we know, Princess Runa had the same idea to you. By now she should be in Johzenji and under their protection. You should take your time to recover and help people when you are better able to do so. It is no good to anybody if you keep running yourself ragged like this.”

It was heartening, to hear the words of the two servants, but Katsumichi could not say he was certain about the situation at all. It would be nice if Runa and Prince Tsutomu had made their way to Johzenji and they were now safe. There were no guarantees that it was in fact the case. For all Katsumichi knew, in the numerous days he had lost, Runa could be imprisoned in Shiratorizawa as an enemy of the state. Worse still, she could be imprisoned in Karasuno.

Karasuno was something of an anomaly in the area and Katsumichi could not say that Johzenji had many, if any, political ties with the kingdom. If Runa were here, if ‘here’ really was Karasuno, there was nothing that Katsumichi would be able to do.

“Is there truly anything that I need to recover from?” Katsumichi asked quietly. “I fear I have always been this useless.”

Yukie’s eyebrows drew down and she tipped her head back, away from Katsumichi.

“I don’t want to hear your self-pity, Prince Katsumichi,” Yukie said sharply. “You need to replenish your energy so that we can repay the hospitality of Karasuno and then continue on to Johzenji. I have never thought of you as useless, but that is all you will be if you cannot even make it home, _Denka_.”

“Shouldn’t we be repaying the hospitality of Princess Kanoka?”

The princess herself was the next to speak. “I said this place belonged to my mother’s family long ago. Now it is within Karasuno lands and we are all guests here currently, Prince Katsumichi.”

Princess Kanoka sniffed loudly and stood up, her shadow stretching and flickering along the floor. Katsumichi was not sure what the tightening in his gut was at the thought that she might approach, but it abated when the princess walked away. She stopped at the door and said, “Perhaps you might like to meet our host.”

Princess Kanoka left without waiting for Katsumichi’s feeble reply and he was glad that she hadn’t heard him mumble his way through speaking with her. In her absence, he drank the water that had been brought.

“I am glad the three of us are still together,” Katsumichi said quietly as he mopped at his mouth with the back of his wrist. Yukie and Kaori exchanged another look, but at least this one did not fill Katsumichi so much with dread as it did with an odd sensation of isolation.

“I’m not sure if I would agree with that,” Yukie sighed and leaned heavily into Kaori’s side. “If only you had remained unconscious for one more night. All my dreams may have come true.”

“What dreams are these?”

“Yes,” Kaori smiled, “What dreams were about to come true?”

“Why, Kaori, my love, we could have concluded on the third night that Prince Katsumichi was no longer in this mortal world. Without having to serve someone as troublesome as he, we could have faked our own deaths and escaped to the wilderness and lived new lives.”

“Why do I have to die for your dreams to come true?” Katsumichi muttered. He could not help that he was pouting, but Yukie continued to laugh in his face, as though years of friendship meant nothing to her.

Princess Kanoka returned, followed by a person who Katsumichi had not seen for years. Johzenji had no political ties with Karasuno, none that mattered anyway, but in his childhood he had become acquainted with some children of Karasuno just as he had with some children of Niiyama. The monarchs, though aged, had all been on good enough terms that they had allowed their children to travel, as though to strengthen the blood bonds of battles that had secured the region.

Karasuno, though the smallest and most impecunious of the kingdoms of the area, was wealthy in children. The king had many wives and concubines who were mostly suspected to be refugees of families who had been all-but wiped out in the battles from decades before. As protections for the refugees, Karasuno had many more children than the other kingdoms which were more focused on beneficial relationships that maintained their strength and status – and this fact alone made the current situation unlikely.

Katsumichi had met Prince Chikara before.

Katsumichi climbed to his feet, an arduous task which made him feel more ashamed that he was like this than anything, and bowed quickly. “Fifteenth Child and Seventh Prince Chikara of Karasuno, it is good to see you. I apologise that I must greet you in this state.”

Prince Chikara nodded lightly, a small smile on his face. “Fifth Child and Fourth Prince Katsumichi of Johzenji, though your current state must be cumbersome I cannot help but think your malady is anything but felicitous.”

Katsumichi did not really see how being poisoned and then falling was particularly beneficial, but he did not think this the time to question it as Prince Chikara strode further into the room and pulled him into a cautious embrace. As inconsequential as the pressure from the prince’s arms was, Katsumichi still hissed at the touch. The fact that he had awoken relatively normally – not wrapped in splints and bandages – suggested the damage from his fall had been minimal but the bruising around his trunk must have been extensive. Prince Chikara released him quickly and moved his hands to cradle Katsumichi’s elbows.

“I hear you are married now.”

Katsumichi inclined his head. “That is correct. Though this sort of conversation seems odd in light of the circumstances.”

Prince Chikara chuckled quietly. “I do apologise. As soon as Princess Kanoka brought you here I have been impatient to be able to speak with you. We should sit, I doubt your condition is good enough for me to labour your body by being a poor host,” he said. He gestured to the futon Katsumichi had been lying on before as he folded his own legs beneath him on the _tatami_. Katsumichi sat and he noticed how Princess Kanoka also sat down, this time near the futon rather than at the fire at the far side of the room.

Yukie and Kaori remained standing by the wall and Prince Chikara turned his smile up at the pair of them. “Would you sit too? I do not believe formalities should be strictly observed out here.”

Yukie and Kaori both quietly thanked him and knelt beside the futon.

“I am sorry that I will dominate the conversation,” Prince Chikara said, looking around at all of them. His eyes glimmered lightly as he turned his gaze more firmly on Katsumichi. “Was it not five years ago that a brother of yours told me I should beg your King to be allowed to stay in Johzenji beyond my studies – to ask to be able to marry you?”

Katsumichi’s mouth dropped open but no sounds came from his throat as the heat rose in his gaping face. Princess Kanoka snickered but had the decency to stifle the noise with her hands when Katsumichi’s trembling eyes found hers. He cleared his throat but his voice still sounded thin when he said, “That was a long time ago.”

“It was, it was,” Prince Chikara agreed. “And now you are married to a child of Shiratorizawa.”

“I–”

“It’s fine. I knew we would never be able to marry. My family is not quite as desirable as the Fearsome Kingdom,” Prince Chikara said with a small smile. He closed his eyes and pressed a fist to his chest.  “It seems I must live on with my love for you in my heart.”

“Stop that!” Katsumichi chided. It had been fine to joke about it when Prince Chikara was studying art at the coast and Katsumichi had gone with him on some whim to break up the mundane matters of palatial life. They had fallen into an easy friendship, Prince Chikara surprisingly knowledgeable in areas that Katsumichi had found unimportant until then – suddenly he was deficient in topics of interest and he regretted that he had never paid proper attention to his own studies – but Prince Chikara was patient and kind and he always laughed whenever Katsumichi could only retort with a bad joke.

It had been fine for Katsumichi’s brothers to joke about him already being married to Prince Chikara when they visited the village Prince Chikara was studying and found them, racing each other in the lake on the estate, sometimes even boating at sea, and exchanging shoddy illustrations of the other’s likeness – they were young and it hardly meant anything. Soon enough Prince Chikara was on his way back home and the months they had spent together were no more than the crudely scribble of the pair of them holding hands on a boat. That had been when they were eighteen and marriage was far off and nothing too important to them at the time. Now they were twenty-three and Katsumichi had eventually found out that such things could be bad.

“What about you?” Katsumichi asked.

“What about me?”

Katsumichi vaguely gestured towards Princess Kanoka whose face quickly pulled into a sneer. “I am marrying into Karasuno, but not with Prince Chikara,” Princess Kanoka said. “Prince Ryuunosuke will not honour the agreement unless Prince Chikara is in Karasuno to observe the marriage.”

“Isn’t it fun?” Prince Chikara asked. “Having power? I know it isn’t real because if Niiyama wanted to press the issue they could just force the marriage. But for now, I ran away and Princess Kanoka was made to come and find me. Whenever they get married is up to me. When do you think I should allow it?”

It sounded as though Prince Chikara was really asking him. Princess Kanoka rolled her eyes and the corner of her mouth was pulled down as she turned her face away. Prince Chikara’s eyes were imploring and Katsumichi did not like the fact that he could not tell what this was – whether it was a genuine question or if his speculation was just for Prince Chikara’s amusement.

“Princess Kanoka, perhaps you should consider the benefits of never marrying. I might be unable to protect my own sister, but if you remain in Niiyama and don’t get too involved with another kingdom they cannot poison you.”

“Poison?” Princess Kanoka asked quickly.

“Prince Katsumichi?”

He had assumed that Yukie or Kaori would have divulged the information. A cursory glance at the two of their stricken faces revealed that was not the case. He mentally apologised to them and hoped that they would not be thought poorly of. They weren’t even present when it happened. There was nothing they could have done, though at this point they were simply protecting Shiratorizawa.

“There are rumours of a plot to dispose of Shiratorizawa’s Crown Prince,” Katsumichi said.

“ _Denka_ ,” Yukie interrupted reproachfully.

“I hear he is in good health. I, on the other hand, was poisoned at the celebration of his day of birth. Apparently there are people are not confident in him, but instead of poisoning him they somehow got me. You have to wonder how desperate the opposition must be to want to get rid of him so carelessly. Princess Kanoka, you might be better off not marrying into Karasuno,” Katsumichi said. He tried to ignore how Prince Chikara leaned closer, hanging off each word. He closed his eyes for a moment and counted to three in his head. He looked only at Princess Kanoka. “Karasuno is too ambitious of a kingdom. I can only hope that becoming a relation might save you, if that is truly what you want, but the pressure of Karasuno’s ambitions is what drove people supporting other princes of Shiratorizawa to attempt regicide. It is Karasuno’s fault that I almost died. I would advise against you aligning yourself with such a kingdom.”

“Prince Katsumichi, you should have married me after all,” Prince Chikara said, his jaw tight and his brow furrowed. “My kingdom is desperate to protect our people. Do you really think it unfair of us to be ‘ambitious’ as you call it? Should we not be trying to secure funds in order to protect and provide for the people we accepted after the lands were ravaged by war? The politics of other kingdoms is nothing to do with us and had we married the protection would have extended to you.”

It was a sound argument, there was no doubt about that. It could well be true that Karasuno was just that insular and the recent news of marriages were just about money. But the wording was strange. A kingdom didn’t belong to a prince in the same way that a prince belonged to a kingdom. Not unless that prince was to become king. He was certain, if Princess Kanoka spoke about Niiyama she would call it by name unlike Crown Princess Kisaki. This was probably not the best time to ask the question, but Katsumichi was not so sure he would have another opportunity.

“Prince Chikara, are you the Crown Prince of Karasuno?”

Prince Chikara smiled and stood quickly. “I’m not sure what would make you ask such a question, but I think this is enough for tonight. You should rest well, Prince Katsumichi.”

“I thought you wanted to speak with me?”

“I did,” Prince Chikara agreed. “And now we have spoken. Goodnight.”

 

The next morning, Kaori served rice porridge to Katsumichi. He ate it slowly, his throat barely managing to swallow each spoonful. The bland, softness was meant to be easy to digest, something he would be able to manage after days of not eating. He knew the reason he was eating this but that didn’t mean he had to like it.

“Isn’t there anything else?” Katsumichi asked.

“You’re unwell,” Kaori replied as though explaining the fact to a small child. Katsumichi knew he was being childish but even knowing it didn’t make him feel embarrassed. He deepened his pout and Kaori rolled her eyes. “Even if we thought you could stomach anything else, _Denka_ , there aren’t too many other options.”

“Are you being dishonest, Kaori?”

She grinned at him. “You must know how much I wish that were the case. We quickly ran out of our rations and Princess Kanoka and Prince Chikara do not have much between them besides rice.”

He supposed that was fair. This place was only partly maintained and Katsumichi had reason to believe that some care was taken of the buildings and the grounds but it was generally uninhabited. If nobody lived here it only made sense that food would be scarce. What Katsumichi still did not see was why this old house was in a state of good enough repair for the runaway Prince Chikara to be able to live here comfortably.

After he had eaten and washed – the bathing facilities were inconvenient but they did the job well enough considering the situation – Princess Kanoka came to see him.

“If you’d like, I can escort you to see Prince Chikara,” She said dourly. She was dressed in oddly in dark colours again, her _hakamashita_ trousers pulled tightly and tucked into her boots and her hair was pulled away from her face in a high ponytail and she wore her sword sheathed at her waist.

Katsumichi was not scared of the consequences of saying that he would not like to go to see Prince Chikara, but his exhaustion was something he had to set aside as he nodded his acquiescence. Princess Kanoka barely gave Katsumichi to slip his feet into boots at the door as he made to follow her.

Yukie grinned cheerfully as she saw him off and had returned inside by the time Katsumichi had stepped from the porch of the small house. It was a fresh morning and though it chilled him, the breeze on Katsumichi’s skin was welcome after however long he had spent confined indoors and suffering from injuries.

Princess Kanoka was not talkative at all. Katsumichi followed behind her sure steps on the ground through the woodland. There were areas of dead leaves that crunched underfoot but some of the crunches were too loud and sharp to just be dead leaves. Katsumichi hoped that was the result of twigs and kept his eyes on Princess Kanoka’s back.

She stopped halfway up a steep incline and Katsumichi stumbled to a pause behind her. He hoped that she did not notice he was out of breath but the recent spate of ailments had been a detriment to his fitness. Princess Kanoka was stock still with her hands at the hilt of her sword.

“What is it?” Katsumichi whispered.

“Did you hear that?”

Katsumichi strained his ears. There was a small stirring of the wind. The leaves overhead rustled gently. His own breath gusted in his ears. Small birds were chirping to one another at the top of the hill. There was a slice of steel.

Princess Kanoka whirled around, the point of her sword at Katsumichi’s throat.

“I’m sorry,” Katsumichi said. He held up his hands but he had no hope of parrying the sword unless he wanted to tumble back down the steep slope. Which he absolutely did not want to do. He should have questioned the decision to deviate from the worn paths of the mountain. If he stayed still he probably wouldn’t overbalance so he tried to stand as upright as he could as he said, “I didn’t hear anything.”

“Are you really an idiot?” Princess Kanoka asked. She tilted her head from side to side, slowly as though she were weighing Katsumichi up.

“I’m sorry?”

“What does it usually mean when somebody points a sword at you, Prince Katsumichi?”

“It usually means I have lost the spar.”

Princess Kanoka smiled. “Prince Katsumichi, who is sparring? You have no sword and there is no referee.”

That was true. Katsumichi was completely unarmed. He didn’t know why he said what he had, aside from it being the truth. Usually being in this position meant he had lost a sparring match. But Princess Kanoka likely meant what it meant in general. The smile quickly faded from the Princess’s face. Her sword rose to Katsumichi’s chin.

“Tell me everything you know.”

“That’s a bit of a vague question. Can you be a little bit more specific? I’m not sure that I could remember ‘everything’ that I know.”

Princess Kanoka dropped her sword to her side, waved it about a little, and re-sheathed it. She giggled quietly.  “Has anyone ever told you that you’re cute?”

Katsumichi had heard that many times during his life, mostly in his youth. His mother used to tell him every single day, and many of the court ladies told him as much too. Once, his uncle, Anabara, said it, though he sounded much more weary of the fact than the other people who had ever told Katsumichi that he was cute. But he had heard it before, so he nodded.

Princess Kanoka smiled, “I’m glad that people have told you. Your mother told you the most, didn’t she?”

“She did.”

“I thought so,” Princess Kanoka said happily.

Katsumichi was beginning to think he might have met Princess Kanoka many years ago, perhaps the year of the Rat had passed twice since to render the memories uncertain and incomplete. He was sure he had met with a few of the princesses of Niiyama in his early childhood but he could not be sure. The scowling stiffness she had showed the day before had Katsumichi fooled, but there was something familiar about her smile. Whatever it was spread warmth in Katsumichi’s chest, like everything was alright. He could be mistaking the sensation of relief for familiarity, but he felt that he knew her smile. Even when her smile tightened and she pulled Katsumichi the rest of the way up the slope.

“My mother used to tell me the same.”

“That’s nice,” Katsumichi commented breathlessly. Princess Kanoka glanced at him with concern and he hoped to allay any such feelings with a smile of his own.

“When mothers are so loving, so intensely, do you think it is because they know they won’t be able to let you feel that love forever?” Princess Kanoka asked.

“I think having felt love for any amount of time allows you to feel it forever,” Katsumichi said. It was something he had heard a lot in Johzenji and it sounded a lot nicer than the melancholy of Princess Kanoka’s smile.

“That sounds nice.” Princess Kanoka tugged on Katsumichi’s arm and stopped next to a break in the trees and a steep drop – a small cliff. Katsumichi took a step back and Princess Kanoka smiled encouragingly at him. She gestured for him to look out over the edge of the cliff. A river passed at the bottom of the cliff and on the opposite bank, low enough to allow a person to sit on the edge and submerge their feet in the current, was a wide green field. The grass was a dull green, broken up by an artificial tributary of the river that surrounded a wide _kofun_ mound.

There was no doubt about the tomb on the other side of the river. A moat around the _kofun_ was fed from the river and the _kofun_ itself was formed of a round mound that was joined to a narrower trapezium-shaped mound. It looked fresh, not more than six years must have passed since the mounds were built over the buried body. Unlike the riverbank outside of the moat, there were no trees scattered about over the mound, there was just the smooth expanse of springy grass. Katsumichi had not expected a detour like this.

“My mother was very compassionate,” Princess Kanoka said. “She was a well-loved woman and when she died four years ago, Karasuno easily allowed us to bury her here in the lands that her family had cared for before the period of war all those years ago. She was not native to the area, nor was she born here, but she visited the locals and paid her respects to the local _kami_ and the people who lived in the area. I was on my way to visit her when I found you.” Princess Kanoka pointed over the edge of the cliff and Katsumichi leaned forwards enough to see a ledge that was perhaps two body-lengths down from the edge. She smiled, “Your servants seemed torn between letting me help and trying to keep me away. But I insisted on helping because it seemed like a sign.”

“A sign?”

“I was made to chase down the brother of my betrothed. I found him here, the place where my mother is buried. While unsure of what to do, I was on my way to visit my mother and I found a child like me. Does that not sound like intervention from the gods themselves?” Princess Kanoka asked.

“It all sounds very convenient,” Katsumichi admitted.

“I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to do before,” Princess Kanoka said, pressing closer to Katsumichi’s side, “But yesterday, hearing the bad luck you have been having recently made me want to help you, regardless of what I am meant to do with this opportunity.”

Princess Kanoka was no longer smiling and her face bore an intensity that Katsumichi had not seen in many people’s faces of late. Whether or not they had previously met, he had not expected her to be so superstitious. Of course, he would not reject help as it was the one thing he was desperate for, but he wasn’t sure what the princess classified as help. She gripped him tightly.

“Have you heard which child of Aoba Johsai is marrying a child of Karasuno?”

“No?” Katsumichi said. He was not even aware that such a marriage was taking place at all and all he knew about the current issues were that Karasuno were searching for matches for their children, an action that was setting even the balance of Shiratorizawa’s government on edge.

“Aoba Johsai’s speciality is military training,” Princess Kanoka said, “So of course all the children of that family are well skilled. For a few years they have even been demonstrative with the power of their power. It can certainly rival the power of a kingdom like Karasuno, though if Aoba Johsai were to launch an ambush it is likely they could triumph over even Shiratorizawa.”

“How could they?” Katsumichi could not help but ask. Aoba Johsai had certainly been a royal house before the war and they had lost an ally in Shiratorizawa which had left them in their current state, lucky to be allowed the luxury and wealth of their old name despite their alleged treachery. But to claim that a noble family like that could rival the powers of royalty and the families who supported them was massive.

“Date is the same, from what I have heard,” Princess Kanoka said. “But the more pressing issue is Aoba Johsai. They gave up one of their children to Karasuno. And their most renowned military officer, Hajime, is to live in Karasuno and make a spouse there. Do you understand, prince Katsumichi?”

He shook his head, because a great many conclusions could be made from that.

Princess Kanoka, held him more desperately closer, and whispered. “If Karasuno were to unite with the fallen houses of Aoba and Date the size of their kingdom could surpass both Shiratorizawa and Johzenji. But worse than that, their military power would decimate even Niiyama, Shiratorizawa and Johzenji combined.”

It seemed an odd conclusion to come to, Karasuno being nestled so snuggle between Shiratorizawa and Niiyama. But of course there were the lands to the south and the west – lands that had been neglected by the kingdoms for years because they cultivated the families that had opposed the kingdoms in the war, because they were too much trouble to bring under their rule – which as wild and unknown as they were surrounded Shiratorizawa completely. Even then there were lands that bordered on Niiyama with yet more small communities that had been abandoned by kingdoms and relied on the grace of their gods housed in the mountains to survive.

The modest ways of living had made these communities seem irrelevant to the politics of the region. But Karasuno was the kingdom who had taken in refugees and very possibly maintained contact with them and kept in good stead with the people who could be trained to fight for them.

“Do you think war will come soon?”

“Princess Kanoka, Prince Katsumichi, are the pair of you kissing over there?”

They both flinched but Princess Kanoka did not jump away at the sound of Prince Chikara’s voice. Instead she fixed Katsumichi with a dark look and then her smile returned. As much as Katsumichi wanted to let the warmth soak back into his bones from the point in his chest that was mostly affected by the sight of Princess Kanoka’s smile, he was shaken and breathless.

“If we were kissing, would you be jealous, Prince Chikara?” Princess Kanoka asked, playful and bright as though she hadn’t just rattled Katsumichi so thoroughly.

“I would ask to be included, naturally,” Prince Chikara said, good natured as he walked along the path towards them. He looked over the cliff-edge at the _kofun_ and bowed his head to Princess Kanoka. “Do you really want to marry my brother, Princess Kanoka?”

She looked surprised by the question, the smile on her face slipping quickly and her eyes darting between Katsumichi and Prince Chikara. “Of course I do, Prince Chikara.”

“Oh? It isn’t just because you fear for your life?”

Princess Kanoka paled and shook her head.

“Very well,” Prince Chikara allowed. “I suppose I have let this go on for long enough. I will need to get back to the main palace anyway if I want to inform Kenji of Date that I have accepted his offer.”

“What?” Katsumichi asked. His voice had cracked sharply from his throat and he was sure he must have misheard. Especially after hearing what Princess Kanoka had told him.

Prince Chikara tilted his head curiously. “Prince Katsumichi, as pleasant as our history is, I shan’t live with an empty heart. You are already married and I think I have left it too long myself. If the offer still stands I think I will have found a good match in Kenji of Date.”

Katsumichi swallowed against the fissures in his throat and nodded. There was no malice in Prince Chikara’s tone as he spoke, though admitting such a thing as a potential match sounded dangerous. It was not an arrangement set in stone and a flimsy query between houses could easily become nothing on a whim.

But it all seemed too soon. For Karasuno to be arranging so many marriages so quickly. A marriage with Niiyama, a marriage with Aoba Johsai, and a marriage with Date. Katsumichi could not refute Princess Kanoka’s whispered confession.

The question he should have asked was no whether war was coming, but when.


	11. The Virtuous Kingdom of Johzenji

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prince Katsumichi leaves Karasuno along with Yukie and Kaori and they arrive in Johzenji.

On the same day that Princess Kanoka had smiled warmly and shattered everything Katsumichi knew, he mounted a horse and followed Yukie and Kaori on their horses. Their preparations had not been replenishing their supplies as much as making haste to get to Johzenji.

They reached Johzenji much slower than expected. Night fell quickly and they had to set up a small, unsheltered and very cold camp just inside the Niiyama border. It was another day’s ride through Niiyama to the border with Johzenji. They stopped once when Yukie said she could catch them a rabbit to eat. Though successful, she had clearly underestimated their size because once cooked, fat splashing into the fire below and spitting back at Yukie and Kaori with vicious licks, the unburnt portions of the rabbit provided only a bite of meat for each of them.

As hungry and tired as they were, when night fell once more and they neared the border between Niiyama and Johzenji, Kaori pleaded with Katsumichi for them to continue. It didn’t take much convincing once Kaori conjured thoughts of sleeping in a warm room on a thick futon which minimised any ground-related discomfort.  

They were accepted quickly to the main palace despite the depth of the night. Katsumichi and Yukie were recognised by the guards and admitted to wait in the main hall. They sat with their luggage around them as their horses were taken to the palace stables to be settled down for the night and a sleepy servant brought a tray of tea. She placed it down and bowed to them all, her gaze catching at Yukie for a long moment before her eyes widened and she broke into a smile.

“Yukie! You’re back,” She cooed happily, kneeling beside Yukie and pulling her into a tight hug. And then her gaze fell upon Katsumichi. She scrambled back and lowered herself into _dogeza_. “I do apologise, Prince Katsumichi, for my impudence. You should punish me as you see fit.”

“It’s fine, Mako,” Katsumichi said tiredly.

“I knew people would miss me more than they missed you,” Yukie grinned cheerfully. Mako sat bolt upright and spread her hands before her, shaking her head so rapidly that she was sure to get dizzy.

“That is not it at all, _Denka_.”

“There is no need to spare his feelings now, Mako! Prince Katsumichi needs to learn someday that he is just a distant royal for whom we have no affection.”

“Yukie, be quiet,” Mako hissed crossly. She inclined her head to Kaori quickly. “Please do not return to Shiratorizawa and tell them that we are all as unruly as Yukie. She is a poor representation of those of us who take pride in our work.”

“I cannot wait for you to remind us all what pride is, Mako!” Yukie said gleefully.

Mako huffed in frustration and stood to bow to Katsumichi. “I’m glad you’re back, _Denka_ , I hope you all sleep well tonight. Except for you, Yukie.”

On her way out, Mako nearly walked straight into the new arrivals. Yukie stifled her chortling and pulled Kaori up with her to bow to Crown Prince Yuuji who was hot on the heels of Prince Taichi rushing into the main hall.

Prince Taichi all but fell to his knees before Katsumichi and threw his arms around him tightly. He breathed slowly into Katsumichi’s neck, his shoulders heaving as he held on for dear life. “Prince Katsumichi, you’re safe. You’re safe.”

“Prince Taichi? What are you doing here?” Katsumichi asked slowly. He glanced up to Crown prince Yuuji who was smiling widely down at the pair of them.

“He arrived the day after Runa and that grouchy boy,” Crown Prince Yuuji shrugged.

He supposed Prince Tsutomu was the ‘grouchy boy’, but it was not much of an explanation.

“Your sister is safe,” Prince Taichi said, still clinging to Katsumichi. “Prince Eita sent news that you had left Shiratorizawa. We all assumed you would come straight here but an eternity passed before your arrival. But you’re here.”

“I am. Didn’t you even think to come and look for me?” Katsumichi asked. Prince Taichi jerked back roughly, his mouth agape and his pupils trembling.

“I wanted to, but I didn’t–”

“Prince Taichi, I’m joking,” Katsumichi smiled, flattening his palms and spreading his fingers across Prince Taichi’s back. “It has been a while.”

 

It was the middle of the night and Prince Taichi’s recently vacated futon was the first thing his eyes happened upon as he walked into the room that had been afforded to the pair of them. He had arrived too late with Yukie and Kaori for the usual hospitality to be available as most of the servants had settled to sleep for the night so they could rouse early in the morning.

Katsumichi hadn’t bathed before he sat in the centre of the futon and wrapped the discarded blanket around his shoulders. He looked up at Prince Taichi and asked, “Did it take long to get up once they told you I was here? What’s the matter with your face?”

Prince Taichi was staring down at him with a stiff face. At the second question he shook his head and his mouth twisted in an ugly way that he probably hadn’t hoped for. He took a few stumbling steps before sinking to his knees and closing the space between them, his kneecaps pressing to Katsumicihi’s through bare layers of silk, Prince Taichi’s sleep-soft _yukata_ against Katsumichi’s dirt-stiff _hakama_. His fists curled and unfurled on his lap as he finally forced himself to say, “Can I say it?”

“Say what?”

“That I…” His brows were furrowed and he licked his lips absently. He cleared his throat and seemed to be brimming with resolve as he said, “Prince Katsumichi, I love you.”

Katsumichi raised his hands and brought them to either side of Prince Taichi’s face. Beneath his hands he felt Prince Taichi’s jaw tense.

“I have wanted to say it for a while, Prince Katsumichi. You may well not feel the same way, but I would like for you to understand how I feel. I know that I asked you to allow me to fall in love with you and this is without your permission, but this felt like the right time to admit it.”

Prince Taichi’s shoulders sagged on his exhale following the confession and his eyes dropped closed. Aside from that he didn’t move, his face was still within Katsumichi’s gasp and he could have already fallen asleep. Katsumichi leaned forwards and pressed his lips to Prince’s Taichi’s lips, and then his nose, and then his forehead. When he pulled back Prince Taichi’s eyes were open and damp.

“What? What does that mean?”

“I love you too, Prince Taichi.”

Katsumichi hadn’t realised how much it would mean to him, seeing Prince Taichi’s reaction to hearing the words he had waited for – to be able to hear, to be able to say himself. He hadn’t realised that the arrangement had stopped being convenient for Johzenji – perhaps because with the things he had learnt it was not as convenient as he had hoped – and convenient for himself. He was glad that the pair of them had been strung together, and that Prince Taichi looked to him, and listened for him, and despite his initial abrasion was probably like this all along.

Or perhaps he was just tired and he had missed the usual routine of sniping at his spouse and whiling away his days at the West River and not doing much of anything else.

“Do you really mean it, Katsumichi, that you love me? I mean, Prince Katsumichi, do you honestly love me?” Prince Taichi asked, his mouth stumbling over his thoughts as he curled his hands around Katsumichi’s wrists.

And Katsumichi couldn’t think of any reason to deny it. He nodded. “I really mean it, Taichi.”

“Can we kiss?”

Katsumichi pressed their lips together softly, trying to force calm against the trembles he felt wracking through Taichi’s entire body. This was unlike any of the times they had kissed before where Taichi had taken the lead under some guise of responsibility. This kiss was more an assurance that this was their reality. They broke away, a wash of Taichi’s gasp on his lips.

“What happened to the person on our wedding night, the person who was so knowledgeable and irritated with me for not apparently knowing how to consummate a marriage?” Katsumichi asked, his thumb tracing over Taichi’s lower lip before pressing in for another light peck.

It wasn’t too long before Katsumichi found out what exactly happened to that person. He had known all along that Taichi was guilty of bolstering, of looking down on Katsumichi’s apparent ignorance just because he thought he knew something that he had no experience of. But there was no time to be smug as Katsumichi undressed them both and pressed Taichi to the futon. Katsumichi was careful and slow as he mapped his hands over Taichi’s body and bringing them closer and closer. It was something he had done a long time ago and even he felt nervous about the whole thing as he coaxed out the reactions he wanted, brought Taichi into being more responsive and less reserved in the whole thing. 

Even with Taichi’s muddled and fumbling attempts at touches that he wasn’t sure about, a quiet word from Katsumichi, just advice about what to leave for another time, he found that he had been putting this off for no real reason. It probably wouldn’t have been much different had they done this the night they met, thought Katsumichi might have found himself more frustrated then. Instead he was glad to be able to recognise the shy hesitance as Taichi asked if what he was doing was okay, then the unbridled joy when he was told he was perfect.

Afterwards when Taichi was lying with his hands over his face, his constantly twisting smile visible beneath the heels of his hands. He only squirmed when Katsumichi wiped at the result of their consummation.

He was glad for a moment, that Taichi’s hands were locked over his eyes. Katsumichi did not need to be seen wondering whether he had secured the marriage in the light of the things he had heard when he was in Karasuno. He knew he would need to tell Taichi what Princess Kanoka had told him, but he would leave that for another day. There was no point in ruining this.

 

In the morning, Katsumichi had the entirely new experience of Taichi’s affections pressed to his collarbones and frowning at the bruising around his ribs. His voice was rough when he noticed Katsumichi’s wakefulness and asked, “What is all of this?”

“I fell,” Katsumichi said. He was sort of ashamed of the fact. That not being properly able to recover from being poisoned had him in the state to walk right off the edge of a cliff – he was exceptionally lucky that he hadn’t cascaded the whole way down the cliff face. His short explanation only served to make Taichi frown, so he added, “It happened when I was coming to Johzenji to ask for help. I hadn’t properly recovered from the poison, I hadn’t eaten properly in days, and I did something stupid.”

“I won’t leave your side until you are back in good health,” Taichi croaked. “You are too thin now.”

“Hmm? What if it takes a long time and you cannot leave my side for years and years?” Katsumichi asked.

“Then so be it,” Taichi said.

The morning after had to occur at some point and Katsumichi had to start acting like a prince again. It only occurred to him after he was clean, dressed, and full that he realised that he hadn’t been acting much like a prince at all. He found himself completely removed from any sort of politics and had been living life far more leisurely than he had been raised to think of. Aside from his spate of injuries.

It was nice to be back home. In Johzenji everyone seemed happier to see him, though he was certain he remembered the palace to have more people before he left. It was only occasionally that he and Taichi would pass a smiling servant who would greet them and congratulate them on their marriage. Katsumichi couldn’t say he was the type of man to know about the lives of everyone he knew, so he had to swallow down his shame at not being able to ask how the conditions of their lives were, whether they had enough money to send home to their families. He couldn’t even recall the names of the few servants he bumped into and it was only once they were out of earshot that he could sigh at that.

“What is the matter with you?” Taichi asked the third time it happened.

“I’ve forgotten how I’m supposed to act,” Katsumichi admitted quietly, face turned away from Taichi on the off-chance that he wouldn’t hear anything at all.

“What do you mean by that?”

“I’ve become lazy, living with you,” Katsumichi said to the ground he walked on, because it was much easier than saying it to Taichi’s face. “Not to say that I wasn’t lazy to begin with, but these days I’m forgetting my duties. Or what I should be able to do. All I do is sit by a river and sulk.”

“That’s hardly fair,” Taichi said. He was bold today, his hand reaching out for Katsumichi’s to stop him. His face was resolute as he looked down at Katsumichi. “You have been settling in to a new kingdom. And then you were poisoned. It hasn’t been that long since our marriage.”

“And I have already become useless.”

“You’re not useless,” Taichi said. And then he inhaled deeply enough to pull up the line of his shoulders. “Besides, if you are lazy I am much worse than you. My mother asked the King to create an unimportant role for me because she knew that I was a bad son. And I’m not even decent enough to do it. I just shut myself away and leave the work to other people.”

Katsumichi had already suspected that Taichi was not particularly filial. There had to be something in the fact that his mother would sooner live with the King than with her son, but it was still too early to be his business. But that was not what he had even meant when he confessed his own shortcomings. There was still a disconnect somewhere, an inability for Katsumichi to properly convey meaning to Taichi.

“Taichi, would you like to meet my mother?” Katsumichi offered, because something like that might help him to better express himself. Taichi frowned, tilted his head, and looked around as though Katsumichi’s mother would jump out from behind one of the flowering shrubs that lined the path.

“That might be nice.”

 

“I was hoping for a few more days off,” Yukie grumbled over her shoulder as she walked along the mountain path.

She would have been better off watching where she was going because the path was not well maintained. There was scree littered underfoot and Taichi had already slipped several times, arms whirling as he grabbed at the nearest person. Eri had been the nearest person one time too many and kept sending injured looks from where she now walked ahead of Yukie with Kaori. As sorry as Katsumichi had felt for Eri he would rather not have been the person being dragged almost to the ground every time Taichi thought he was losing his footing.

“What do you mean days off?” Katsumichi asked, heaving Taichi up and ignoring the apologetic look being sent his way.

“Not being at your beck and call. That sort of thing.”

“You are a servant,” Eri pointed out.

“Yes,” Yukie sighed, kicking more exaggeratedly at the legs of her _hakama_ with each step she took. “How much praying should I do my next life is spent being a servant to somebody less needy than Prince Katsumichi?”

“Wouldn’t you rather pray for royal birth?” Katsumichi asked innocently. He bit his lips to hide his smile with Yukie turned around and raised the bottle of _sake_ she had been tasked with carrying as though she meant to throw it at him.

“You’re a funny man.”

“I am, aren’t I.”

Yukie snorted and closed the distance to shove at Katsumichi’s shoulder before stalking more quickly along the path as it wound uphill. Kaori looked at him wide-eyed and hesitated for a moment before dashing after Yukie. Eri shook her head and rolled her eyes walking at a slow enough pace that even Taichi would be able to keep up. It was unlikely that she knew the exact route, but Katsumichi doubted that Yukie and Kaori would get too far ahead of them.

As they walked, Taichi kept sending meaningful glances at Katsumichi and, since it had been a while since his last slip and fall, it could only mean he wanted to ask about something. Katsumichi wished he would spit it out. He was wearing the same expression as he had been when he first saw Katsumichi, dressed in the dull white _joue_ he had been provided. The meaning was surely obvious, but Taichi had been thinking very loudly of late.

“What is it?” Katsumichi asked, giving up.

“Why are you funny, Katsumichi?”

“I’m sorry?” Katsumichi had not been telling any jokes.

“Yukie said you were funny, when you were talking about… praying,” Taichi said with a pointed glance down at his _white joue_ jacket and the matching white _hamaka_ trousers underneath.

Katsumichi still wasn’t sure what about the conversation he was being asked about. It was Eri who paused in her stride with a stifled exclamation. “Ah!”

“What is it?” Katsumichi asked.

Eri looked reluctant for a moment and her fingers drummed against the wooden box of washed rice she was carrying. She shook her head. “Prince Taichi, did you mean to ask Prince Katsumichi about Yukie?”

“That’s right.”

“What about Yukie?”

“Prince Katsumichi, Prince Taichi doesn’t know,” Eri said, her voice thin as though she were speaking against him. It was odd considering Katsumichi still felt too awkward to expect anything akin to respect from her, and it had been that way since he first arrived at West River. He couldn’t quite pinpoint when she had changed, but it had been recently. She seemed to swallow back her flush as she continued. “Yukie was born to a royal household in the south. I’m not certain of all the details but was made to become a servant as some sort of punishment to her family. So even if she wished for royal birth she has already had it and it hasn’t served her very well in this life.”

“Really?”

“Did you not know?” Katsumichi asked. He couldn’t recall mentioning it himself but he was sure the subject must have come up at some point. “Well, you know now, I suppose.”

Taichi’s reproachful response was obliterated by the way he took a wrong step, scree rolling about underfoot sending him flat on the floor. He groaned a bit pathetically before he let Katsumichi help him up. His palms were grazed and he held them limply forwards though he expected them to magically heal as he pouted down at his dust-covered _joue_.

“What is wrong with you?” Katsumichi asked flatly. He picked up Taichi’s black _ebisu_ hat, the strings of it having come undone so it rolled across the ground with the fall. Katsumichi dusted it off and positioned it back on Taichi’s head and tied it in place. He didn’t want to mention it, but lately he thought Taichi might have been doing him a favour by avoiding him all the time.

“Is that it? I’m mortally injured and that is all the sympathy you can muster?” Taichi asked with a sigh.

“I have been poisoned and fallen from a cliff in the past month alone. You’ll have to do better than tripping over if you want any sympathy,” Katsumichi said. He caught Eri’s eye, saw her raising the wooden box to her face to hide how much she was laughing. “Come on, it would be rude to keep my mother waiting any longer.”

“And it isn’t rude to be a mess, I suppose?” Taichi grumbled under his breath.

Katsumichi didn’t dignify that with a response. They didn’t get much further before Taichi had fallen over again, this time on his backside. It had been funny at the time to watch Taichi’s arms spin as he overbalanced and landed heavily. Kaori looked surprised but Yukie only tutted from where she had jumped out of the bushes.

“I’ll have to try harder to get you next time, Prince Katsumichi,” Yukie sighed wistfully.

The rest of the journey occurred without incident, aside from Taichi’s occasional grumbles about the state of his dress. The complaints gradually became few and further between and Katsumichi wondered whether it was an inherent sense of their proximity to the _kofun_.

His mother’s _kofun_ was much smaller than the one which housed Princess Kanoka’s mother. It used to be the site of an old shrine that was damaged in a storm over ten years before. And was accessible from the mountain path. Trees obscured the bulk of the _kofun_ mound, the trees that had grown over the top were younger than the trees around them so the treeline was mostly even aside from the peak of the low mound.

It had been a while since Katsumichi’s last visit here but he would never forget the location of the entrance of the short path from the edge of the _kofun_ to the place where his mother was buried. Runa was kneeling at the entrance to the path and looked surprised only for a moment.

“You’re, dressed up,” Runa commented in lieu of a greeting. Runa was dressed more casually with a very thin _kosode_ pulled over her head to shield her from the midday heat and light.

“This is a special occasion,” Katsumichi defended. “It is the first time Taichi is meeting our mother.”

Runa’s eyes widened a fraction before she smiled. “I’m sure she would have liked it better to meet you while she was still alive, Prince Taichi.”

“I didn’t even know Taichi when our mother was still alive,” Katsumichi muttered under his breath. Yukie kicked him swiftly in the shin but was cheerily smiling at Runa as though she had done nothing of the sort.

It wasn’t anything that could be helped. Their mother had been dead for quite some time. She hadn’t lived long enough to see any of her children have their own children, or marry, or gain any political status, or do anything more than squabble over who had been the first to shove one of their siblings into a giant muddy puddle.

After making their way through the tree-lined path and leaving the _sake_ and rice, and speaking quietly to their mother, Runa joined them on the way back. It felt nicer, to have Runa with them too as they made their way back. Taichi had been quiet ever since they had reached the _kofun_ and hadn’t said much besides a muted ‘nice to meet you’ as they stood at the place Runa and Katsumichi’s mother had been buried.

He didn’t say anything on the way back down the mountain either. He lost his footing several times and only offered silent apologies each time he tugged at Katsumicih’s arm to steady himself. He was probably more relieved about getting to bathe once they had returned to the palace. 

Katsumichi wasn’t going to begrudge him that time. Runa still lingered when the servants had left, swaying in place and smiling at Katsumichi.

“What?”

“Nothing,” She said, sounding far too happy for it to be nothing.

“Why aren’t you somewhere with Prince Tsutomu?” Katsumichi asked. He had no idea why he was feeling flustered with Runa smiling at him so serenely. She barely batted an eyelid at the mention of Prince Tsutomu.

“I think he is busy trying to practice being bad at playing _Igo_ ,” She said as though it didn’t matter. It mattered a lot to Katsumichi considering quite a lot of Runa and Prince Tsutomu’s relationship was about Runa teaching Prince Tsutomu to play the game. Before Katsumichi could question that, Runa reached for Katsumichi’s hand and held it lightly in her own. “It is nice, the both of us being back with our family.”

It was nice. Despite the fact that the palace seemed a quieter, more solemn place than he remembered, the familiarity of Johzenji had settled Katsumichi. As evening fell, Runa and Katsumichi could watch the guards on their slow patrol under the light of lanterns and the stars. There was not as much of their family as Katsumichi had hoped, but for now it was enough. It was more than he had in Shiratorizawa and he was happy for even this much of the life he remembered. 

 

Katsumichi had found Arata, the next morning. They had not seen one another since the confirmation of Katsumichi’s marriage, which felt even more of a lie now that the marriage had been consummated. Not that Arata needed to know anything of the sort.

The odd feeling of wanted to confess to the crime of dishonesty pushed against the back of Katsumichi’s teeth and he was only able to stifle the sensation with tight grins as he listened to Arata’s tales of how things were in his mother’s home town.

“You don’t live here in the main palace?” Katsumichi asked, setting down his cup of tea and squinting at the _igo_ board that sat between them. He needed to concentrate because he was not as good at mental activities as his younger brother. But Prince Arata, following his time travelling to the main palace thought this was the best way to spend his time. Apparently.

“Not anymore,” Arata said quietly. He avoided Katsumichi’s gaze though it was not certain whether doing so was for the purpose of the game or just to avoid revealing too much. “It is pleasant living in my mother’s home town anyway. I suppose the rest of our brothers would agree.”

“Isn’t it lonely?”

“There are people everywhere,” Arata said, his voice soft as he levelled something like pity at Katsumichi. “Of course I miss seeing my siblings as often as I used to, but it is not like returning here often would change things. They don’t live here either. And I am busy regulating the trade links across the kingdom.”

Arata placed a white stone on the board with a smile and removed the black stones he had successfully surrounded. Katsumichi had missed it entirely and blinked at the board as Arata removed the surrounded pieces in succession.

“Are you paying attention, Prince Katsumichi?” Arata asked sardonically.

“Of course I am,” Katsumichi muttered. He thought he had been paying attention but he had already been beaten in three games before this. His eyes were getting worse at spotting the patterns on the board and it was near impossible to identify his impending defeat. He rubbed at his temples slowly. “I’m just tired. My mind isn’t as sharp as it could be.”

“In all my life this is the sharpest I have seen you,” Arata said with a small grin. “But I think there is still more that you’re not seeing.”

“What does that mean?”

“It’s your turn.”

Katsumichi looked at the board, and of course it was his turn. He had lost a lot of stones at Arata’s last turn so he could only hope for a merciful defeat in this fourth match. He placed down a stone and realised too late that he had set himself up to have the stone taken again.

“Are you playing with your eyes shut?” Arata laughed, collecting stones from the board and organising them in the bowls of their respective colours.

 

Katsumichi supposed that maybe he had been living his whole life with his eyes shut. He hadn’t realised that it was the case until Crown Prince Yuuji had stopped by at the guest rooms to visit Katsumichi and Taichi. He waved off the offer of tea and asked how life was in Shiratorizawa, whether Katsumichi was getting used to it.

The questions were bland considering their sister had run from the kingdom to avoid marriage just days after Katsumichi had been poisoned. Being the Crown Prince must have been busy, there was a chance that he might not have known.

Katsumichi was midway through his own bland reply about the mountains at West River providing gentle paths to walk along when he noticed their uncle Anabara’s entrance. The man stayed quiet but nodded to Katsumichi and Taichi. He remained at the doorway until Katsumichi finished his half-coherent thought about the summer weather making it nice enough to walk through the mountains at night.

“ _Heika_ ,” Anabara said with a short bow. Crown Prince Yuuji turned to greet Anabara with a smile, a mistake if Katsumichi had ever seen one.

Katsumichi glanced at Taichi from the corner of his eye and noticed the stiffness of his spouse’s shoulders. Katsumichi exhaled and hoped that he was acting natural. It wouldn’t do to make a fuss, especially not now. He had to pretend not to be affected by the connotations of that one word. He had to forget about himself and whatever flimsy affections he held and think of what was best for the Virtuous Kingdom of Johzenji.

At that time, the best thing to do was watch the backs of his elder brother and his uncle until he was alone with Taichi.

“So things are like this in Johzenji,” Taichi said with a humourless huff.

“It seems that way,” Katsumichi agreed.

“Were you going to tell me?”

Katsumichi couldn’t help his scoff. When he looked again at Taichi, he was being seriously scrutinised. What a strange question to be asked. “The way things were, you would have known before me,” Katsumichi said. “Were you going to tell me?”

Taichi’s face contorted a few times as he struggled to force words through his throat. Katsumichi wished it would have been much more of a struggle because he would rather not have heard, “Of course I would have told you if your father had died.”

Katsumichi knew that it was probably true. That did not mean he wanted such things to be confirmed for him like that.

The last few years of Katsumichi’s life in Johzenji had been under Crown Prince Yuuji’s rule as proxy. A special effort was made to ensure the King still lived on a strong and virile ruler even into his old age. It wouldn’t do to have the aging King appearing more and more fragile and frail so public appearances dwindled and Crown Prince Yuuji took over as many of the diplomatic matters as he could. Katsumichi already knew that. He already knew that his father had been patiently waiting for the last vestiges of his life to whisper away from him, but he did not need to hear Taichi bluntly say it.

Katsumichi wanted nothing more than to chase down his brother and beg to know the truth of the matter, whether it was a strange habit that had developed or it simply was the case. But he couldn’t do that. He had to be content with sitting beside his spouse and repressing what urges he had to cry and vomit.

“Will you tell the people of your kingdom?” Katsumichi asked. There were more important things to consider than whether his father had been allowed a secret funeral, whether his death would be properly announced soon, whether his death had come about through the nature of his long illness. He had to do what he could, though it was not much.

“Would you want me to tell them?” Taichi retorted unhelpfully. Katsumichi sighed and shifted out of _seiza_ , unfolding his legs and stretching them out in front of him so that his feet had to rest on Taichi’s thighs. The other prince held at Katsumichi’s ankles, his thumbs slowly stroking the skin just above the edge of the _tabi_ that socked his feet. After a long moment when it became apparent that Katsumichi wouldn’t answer the question, wouldn’t give him a clue, he said, “Of course I won’t tell them. It wouldn’t make you happy.”

“I don’t suppose that much would at this moment,” Katsumichi admitted wistfully.

“What makes you say that?” Taichi asked, his hands tightening their grip around Katsumichi’s ankles.

“Say we returned to Shiratorizawa and found the people of the court addressing Crown Prince Jin as a king, and your spouse–”

“That would be you?”

“That would be me,” Katsumichi confirmed, “Came up with the supposition that Crown Prince Jin might not have got that title through the expected means. And there was a very small possibility that the previous king was disposed of through sinister means.”

“Do you believe that hypothesis has even a modicum of truth?” Taichi asked.

It was not something that he wanted to admit, that his brother could have killed their father, but a lot of things did not make sense. Kazuma’s mother, Lady Wakayo, had been wonderful enough as she received them as guests, but the absence of her son, and so many of Katsumichi’s brothers did not seem right. His brothers notwithstanding, the palace itself seemed so much quieter than usual, an oppressive solemnness that hung heavy in the corridors and courtyards and had the – much smaller amount than usual – servants and staff bowing their heads and speaking at lower volumes.

Until Runa had arrived, just as bright as ever, with the man she intended to marry against the wishes of the kingdom she had been sent to, as a gift? A hostage?

Katsumichi shook his head and Taichi exhaled, a relieved laugh catching at the back of his throat as he smiled back. “See, there is nothing to worry about–”

“No. Have you ever had correspondence with my brother? With Crown Prince Yuuji?” Katsumichi interrupted. Taichi paused for a moment, brow furrowed. And then he nodded.

“He wrote to me personally after discovering I was looking for a spouse. He didn’t recommend many of your siblings highly but you sounded agreeable enough. We’re the same age and neither of us hunger for thrones,” Taichi said. After a pause he added, “You’re not the only one who asked me to take Princess Runa as a second.”

Nothing felt as solid as it should, the ground beneath Katsumichi shifted slowly and even Taichi was swaying with the screaming crashes of the waves of a stormy sea.

Katsumichi had once been in the midst of such an ocean, during his youth with Prince Chikara. The art teacher was sulking after too many missed lessons so Katsumichi decided to find something else to occupy the time. He had never been a particularly charming person but he had somehow convinced someone at the harbour to take them out on the sea. It probably served him right that the only person to accept the plea was not a particularly experienced sailor, did not refuse as the sky deepened to a midnight afternoon and the clouds split with great flashes and crashes.

Nothing particularly bad happened. Prince Chikara was very annoyed as they raced back to the house they were staying at, shivering and soaking and thoroughly shaken from being tossed about so easily. Somehow word got back to the main palace of Johzenji and Prince Chikara’s patronage came to an end sooner than expected. And they were unable to meet again for five years.

It was not until Katsumichi had returned to the main palace that he first heard that the King’s health had deteriorated. It was not until now, his second return home that he wondered whether a great many happenings in Johzenji had had such serendipitous timing.

“Yuuji asked you?” Katsumichi asked, just to be sure.

Taichi nodded. “He asked me for a favour. He thanked me for marrying you and asked if I could marry your sister too. Obviously I told him I couldn’t, but she was sent to us anyway for ‘education’.”

And the vagueness of Runa’s education made sense. It was protection in case the deposition of the king turned bloody. Even his own marriage, one that he had been trying to convince himself was for the good of both kingdoms despite the political goals of his spouse being non-existent. There were no limits to how much of Katsumichi’s life had been revealed to him at an angle that seemed logical and sensible. But one word had shifted everything, shown him a corner of truth that he shouldn’t have known about, and every single thing that had happened in his life could all have been fabrications to hide the truth.

He was mostly offended that he had been deemed too stupid or untrustworthy to know anything about the workings of his own kingdom.

“I’m sorry,” Taichi said. He released Katsumichi’s ankles and smiled tightly.  

“You’re probably the last person who needs to be sorry,” Katsumichi said. Having met Taichi’s brothers, Katsumichi was well aware that he could have done much worse in terms of a spouse. At least he had someone as desperately selfish as Taichi, a person who said he only cared for his own personal happiness. He could have ended up with someone as inflammatory as Prince Satori, or as standoffish as Prince Kenjirou, or even someone as amenable as Prince Tsutomu.

Prince Tsutomu was by no means the worst of the children of Shiratorizawa but there was something unsettling about how thoroughly he thought the traditions of the throne should be followed. Whatever his feelings for Runa really comprised of, Katsumichi was sure he was a person who would slay every one of his siblings if he could sit well on the throne. He seemed less obedient to the love of his family than to the heat of his bloodline. But Runa had admitted that there wasn’t much about him that she disliked. If she were doomed to a marriage with Shiratorizawa, he would be her best option. Just as Taichi had been Katsumichi’s.

Rather than accepting an apology, Katsumichi was very aware that he should have been thanking his spouse.

Taichi smiled. He said, “Will you lie with me?”

“Does this seem like the time?”

“Ah, well, I feel I would be comforted by your skin.”

“Is betrayal and the decimation of everything I have known something that arouses you?” Katsumichi asked. His entire world had shattered just minutes before yet Taichi, distantly at ease, thought this the time to proposition him. 

“I will not lie and tell you I think you will find comfort in my skin, but I can tell you the truth that I believe,” Taichi said thoughtfully.

Katsumichi hadn’t hated consummating the marriage, finally. It was different to what he was used to but by no means disagreeable. Taichi was more shy and fumbling than Katsumichi had expected. It was just as Katsumichi had feared yet Taichi had not berated him, nor thrown him from their home, nor denounced him for any of his subtle guidance. He had listened intently and pressed ever closer and clung to Katsumichi and afterwards told him, “I’m happy.” 

Katsumichi wanted to be happy. 

“Should I accept that my father’s death was silent? That the rule of my kingdom is in my brother’s hands? That he sits on the throne without the knowledge or consent of the people he rules over?” Katsumichi asked.

Taichi sighed, resigned. “There isn’t anything that you can do about those things,” He said.

He was right, but that didn’t change the tightness of Katsumichi’s chest, the constriction of his entire body held rigid by the realisation that he had never known one truth about his life. There was so much that he had simply taken for face value which would have revealed at least something factual. He wanted to be happy, to be a child in the palace who was known for his face and his joy for the simpler aspects of doing nothing. He wanted to be happy and he wanted to forget.

“There isn’t much that I can do anything about,” Katsumichi agreed. “I too would like to find comfort.”

Taichi blushed and hesitantly pointed a finger at himself. “Are you saying you will lie with me?”

“I am saying I will find comfort in ignorance. Should I accept all of those things, all of those potentially terrible things about Johzenji? I will do it if you tell me to,” Katsumichi said steadily.

Taichi pressed his palms to his face and when he removed them the heat in his face seemed to recede a little. He crawled closer and placed his hands on Katsumichi’s shoulders. “Accept it.”

By the time the sun had set, Taichi was pressing his face against Katsumichi’s chest and tracing slow lines over his torso as he counted their breaths. Katsumichi held his arm loosely around Taichi. Watched the purposeful drag of Taichi’s nail over his skin and prayed to each inflamed stroke that he really would accept the way things were.


	12. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the revelations of Johzenji, they return to the West River Estate.

Runa and Prince Tsutomu returned with Katsumichi and Taichi to Shiratorizawa. They first went to the main palace to thank them for some myriad of reasons that Katsumichi did not think were deserved, before going to the West River Estate. The palace was as sombre and dry as expected and they all shared sentiments of looking forwards to the freshness of the West River.

Katsumichi had assumed that Prince Tsutomu would stay at the main palace where he had always lived, but his assumption proved wrong when they were accompanied on the way back by an extra carriage with Prince Tsutomu’s personal servant and some of his belongings. There was no time to have anything prepared for him at West River so Katsumichi had to feign ignorance at the fact he was adhered to Runa’s side, probably long after nightfall.

Katsumichi had suspected that old habits might resurface once they were back at West River. He was pleasantly surprised, albeit entirely at a loss for what he was supposed to do in the situation.

Much like before Runa came to the estate, when they had practiced the appearance of love, Taichi was almost always at his side. They ate together, usually sitting by the river, and they would go for walks in the morning. In the afternoons, Taichi would see to whatever business he had, which mostly seemed to be ignoring correspondence from the main palace and fastening his lips to Katsumichi’s.

Katsumichi, dizzy and tender placed his hand over Taichi’s mouth when he pulled away, probably to spout some unnecessary nonsense that would ruin things. It might have been unfair of him, but these days he preferred Taichi not to talk just in case he said something that would pull to tightly at the perfect tension of the string that linked them. His lips were sore and he felt young and at least he wasn’t thinking of silly things like treason and regicide.

“What is it that you actually do in here?” Katsumichi asked. Taichi began to wriggle his eyebrows suggestively but Katsumichi went on, hoping his tone was compressed enough to sound like he hadn’t noticed. “What work is it that you are supposed to be doing in here?”

Taichi glared pointedly until Katsumichi removed his hand from his mouth. When he pulled himself closer, Katsumichi was certain there was going to be more kissing and tried not to be disappointed when Taichi only rested his head on Katsumichi’s shoulder. “My mother’s family have dealt with the taxation and employment of West River for years and years. I’m just a slightly more important person to write to the main palace to confirm things. Sometimes they write back to me but it is usually something boring that I send straight on to my mother’s family. Do you wish for me to do some real work?”

“No,” Katsumichi said, knowing a wish like that wouldn’t likely come to fruition. “Rather, I’d like to know how it was you occupied your days on each occasion that you saw fit to avoid me.”

“Of course I spent each day longing for you, from the chirp of the rabbit to the crow of the rooster,” Taichi said very seriously.

“Naturally,” Katsumichi said, matching his tone, “But surely there were times when the obvious intensity of your love gave way to bouts of productivity.”

“Ah, you’re right,” Taichi nodded. “In fact I feel a long overdue bout of productivity coming on right now.”

Taichi wasn’t sulking, probably. Sulking was not something that Katsumichi had openly seen but there was a definite petulance to the way Taichi walked over to his desk and folded his legs beneath himself and swept his arms high and wide as he opened one of the letters on the stack on his desk.

“How diligent of you,” Katsumichi commented drily. After a moment of watching the straightness of Taichi’s shoulders he walked over and sat close enough that their thighs touched. “I have no idea why you weren’t appointed to a more substantial role in government.”

“Katsumichi,” Taichi said, voice small and low. His eyes were trained on the page that was crumpling in his hands so Katsumichi had no hope of reading the characters there if he did give in to the need to be nosy.

“Yes?”

“If I learnt of something that might hurt you, would you want to know?”

“It depends on what it is,” Katsumichi said evenly. There was no need for him to worry when Taichi was only being neutral.

Taichi looked askance at him, the corners of his mouth drawn down and his eyebrows gathered in a frown. “If I learnt the circumstances of you being poisoned, would you want me to share the information or is it something you could just accept if I told you to?”

“Never mind me, is it something that you could accept?” Katsumichi asked quietly. Secretly, he hoped that Taichi could do nothing of the sort and that he wouldn’t ask as much of Katsumichi. Being poisoned and nearly dying was not something that Katsumichi could think back on lightly, it wasn’t something he could accept so easily as something that hadn’t directly hurt him. The matters of Johzenji were a lifetime away from Shiratorizawa. He hoped that though he had asked the question in the first place it would be something that Taichi could not even bear to consider.

There was an intimacy between them that Katsumichi hoped expanded into emotional intimacy.

“To be honest, if I had learnt of this before, I might have concealed it from you. I might have destroyed any evidence of the knowledge and lived as ignorantly as you,” Taichi said, his fingers loosening in their grip on the letter. “But you allowed me to fall in love with you, and that was all that I could have asked of you. So it is not something I can easily accept. But it is not something I can easily admit to knowing.”

“How bad is it?” Katsumichi asked, his fingers just missing the edge of the page as Taichi pulled it away from his grasp.

“Crown Prince Jin, well he is the crown prince no longer. The title now belongs to the second child.”

“Prince Wakatoshi?” Katsumichi clarified despite knowing there was only one answer to that. Taichi nodded in response.

There had been rumours of people of Shiraotirzawa supporting Prince Wakatoshi, disagreeing with the elder Prince Jin’s position of the crown prince because he was weaker, cut a less imposing figure, was a much more agreeable person to speak with. It was a shame because a kind, gentle ruler could have been just as good for Shiratorizawa as a bastion of strength. The current times were peaceful and there was no need for a warmongering figure to rule a kingdom. But there are many who would have preferred it, and the things Taichi had said – the things that got him in trouble before – made sense. Poisoning Prince Jin to replace him with Prince Wakatoshi was for the good of the kingdom in the eyes of some. It was just that making such an accusation had not gone down well with company in the palace.

“Crown Prince Jin isn’t… dead, is he?” Katsumichi asked quietly, because there was no other way to approach the question.

Taichi shook his head. “We would have heard long before now if that were the case. I wish he were dead though.”

“Taichi! I thought you were fond of Crown Prince Jin,” Katsumichi said, getting more confused. He was only guessing that the circumstances of his poisoning were to do with the Crown Prince’s deposition. But if he couldn’t correctly guess which of his siblings Taichi was fond of, he hadn’t much chance of making an accurate conjecture to the information that was still being withheld.

“I was, and I have lived to regret that,” Taichi grumbled darkly. He placed the letter on the desk and flattened it out where he had crumpled the paper until it was near illegible.

 

_Twelfth Child of Shiratorizawa_

_I am offering you my greetings before I am officially bestowed with my new title._

_It is unfortunate that my gain came at the expense of the First Child and of your spouse who was lucky not to lose his life. Apologise to your spouse for the cowardice of our brother. His misguided attempt to bow to the pressure of his opposition almost caused a casualty that you would have disliked._

_Also tell your spouse that the King agreed to dissolve my engagement with Johzenji’s Ninth Child._

_I wish you a good marriage,_

_Crown Prince Wakatoshi_

 

From what Taichi had said, it seemed the conclusion he had drawn from the contents of the letter was much the same as what Katsumichi thought after reading it. “Did Crown Prince Jin try to poison himself?”

“It certainly seems that way, doesn’t it,” Taichi muttered bitterly. He folded the letter over so the characters on the page were gone and replaced by the rapid drumming of his fingers on the desk. “You shouldn’t have married me. You should have married into a kingdom where the royal family was not abundant with idiotic children.”

“I believe I came from a family abundant with idiotic children anyway,” Katsumichi said. It didn’t seem to help because Taichi’s jaw tightened and he snorted roughly.

Taichi wasn’t the one who was poisoned, Katsumichi didn’t see why he had to continue making a fuss out of this. He was mostly glad that his spouse would be so fiercely roused by the harm that came to him, but he didn’t want to hear useless words about how they should not have married. That was the furthest thing from what he wanted to hear. After wondering whether struggling for happiness would be worth it, he didn’t want to hear what he had been thinking himself all along, what the person who almost became his spouse had said.

“It is likely that all of the kingdoms are abundant with idiotic children,” Katsumichi added. “How something like that could have happened after the parents that fought the wars that maintained peace in the region is a mystery. And then these idiotic children insist on marrying and making others worry.”

“Hearing that you could have ended up married to some other idiot hardly comforts me,” Taichi said, his voice not as tight as before. Katsumichi reached out for the hem of Taichi’s sleeve and then for his hand and held it in both of his own hands. Taichi smiled slightly and leaned into Katsumichi’s shoulder. “Having you here beside me is most likely the luckiest thing I have experienced in my life.”

“You could have fallen in love with anybody. If your only hope for a marriage was to eventually fall in love with your spouse, anybody would have done.”

“But I happened to take an interest in marriage around the same time that your brother was looking for political leverage,” Taichi said wearily. He had become lazier since they had returned from Johzenji. Katsumichi wasn’t sure whether it was because the kissing and touching sapped the energy from Taichi’s bones or whether he had been this lazy all along, but he didn’t like the thought of Taichi drifting off when Katsumichi might have had something useful to say.

There was no point in building up to it, spouting platitudes about how nearly being killed didn’t mean a thing. “How many of Karasuno’s recent marriages do you know of?”

“I don’t really keep up with that sort of thing.”

“I would be happier if you at least tried to pay attention considering you are my only source of information,” Katsumichi muttered as he jabbed Taichi in the side. He ignored the lethargic protests and went on, “I had heard whispers about a marriage between Karasuno and Aoba Johsai, but on my way to Johzenji it was confirmed. That and a marriage with Niiyama and another with Date.”

“What?” Taichi sat up straighter and his gaze was sharper as he scrutinised Katsumichi. “What are you talking about?”

“I’m not sure who but someone at Karasuno is marrying The Fourth Princess Kanoka of Niiyama. And Fifteenth Child and Seventh Prince Chikara of Karasuno is to marry a child of Date.”

Taichi closed his eyes and sighed. He reached for Katsumichi’s thigh and drummed his fingers slowly as he pressed himself more heavily into Katsumichi’s side. “Where did you hear that?” He asked.

“When I was in Karasuno, I met an old friend who told me,” Katsumichi said.

Taichi nodded into Katsumichi’s chest and his breathing evened out before he could respond.

 

Katsumichi should have known something was amiss when Taichi used an impromptu nap to end a conversation.

It was Runa who approached Katsumichi one morning, a sheen of sweat across her face as she pulled at her layers of clothing to let some air circulate. Her sword was in her hand, the tip of the sheath trailing along the ground and disturbing the small pebbles in its wake.

“It is unusual for you to be alone,” Runa said evenly in lieu of a greeting. She waited a moment, her face not reacting to Katsumichi’s smile of greeting, before she sat next to him on the riverbank. Katsumichi had just wanted to sit alone for a little bit once he had woken up. He felt a bit disappointed that he hadn’t had to try very hard to dissuade Yukie from accompanying him, but the whole point was that he wanted to be alone to think. And it wasn’t that unusual. Katsumichi used to be alone at West River all the time.

Runa lay her sword on the ground in front of her feet and scratched behind her ear awkwardly as she watched the same current that Katsumichi had been watching. “Where is Prince Taichi?” She asked.

“I’m not sure. I haven’t seen him yet today.”

“Has he spoken to you about anything… big lately?” Run asked. She pulled her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them as she watched Katsumichi closely. Katsumichi didn’t know how he was supposed to react or what signs he was supposed to be showing.

“What sort of ‘big’ thing is he supposed to have told me?”

“I was just asking what you had heard,” Runa said. The pair of them were quiet for a moment. But Runa couldn’t stay patient. “Has Prince Taichi not mentioned anything significant to you? Really?”

“What would he have told me, Runa?”

Runa seemed to brace herself with a few deep breaths. Her face turned determined and she pushed her legs straight out before her. Before she spoke, Katsumichi couldn’t even imagine what it was that had Runa acting so skittish. Even after she spoke, Katsumichi couldn’t quite understand it at all.

“Karasuno are preparing for a war.”

 

“Taichi.”

Katsumichi’s voice came out too quietly as he kneeled outside the door and he doubted Taichi could even hear him from inside his room. He almost didn’t want to go inside and hear what his spouse had to say. But his sister had wept, terrified of what it meant for them. She had been at Johzenji longer so she must have seen things and worked some things about before Katsumichi had even arrived. She had every right to be scared, but Katsumichi had to at least try to appease her worries.

Chances are, he wouldn’t be able to do anything of the sort.

He cleared his throat and tried again. “Taichi.”

There was no reply from within and there were footsteps approaching along the wooden boards of the veranda around Taichi’s rooms.

“Prince Katsumichi,” Kaori said, her voice a bit too high and her knuckles paling on the basket of cloths she was clutching to her chest.

“Good morning, Kaori.”

“Are you alright?” She asked, probably because she had to be polite in situations like this. Situations where she was quite clearly hiding something.

“I just wanted to speak with Taichi.”

Kaori nodded, her eyes round and her lips pressed tightly together. “I’m afraid you won’t be able to speak with him currently. He is unwell.”

“Surely you know a lie like that would make me want to see him even more.”

“I’m sorry?”

“Who wouldn’t want to be with their spouse at a time where they must feel so pathetic and helpless. Wouldn’t you agree that he too would want to see me. If only to find comfort in the fact that I wish to care for him at a time such as this,” Katsumichi said. He was impressed by how he was able to maintain his voice. He didn’t want to believe that he had been lied to and deceived but the longer he had to go without confirming the facts, the more likely it became. And he didn’t want to look at Taichi as though he was a bad person, not after how long it took to look at Taichi as someone he genuinely cared for. He needed to know the truth but finding out could ruin him.

“It’s not a lie,” Kaori said. She adjusted her grip on the basket she carried and Katsumichi wondered whether she truly thought she was being subtle about the whole thing. 

“Forgive me, Kaori,” Katsumichi said quietly. He wrenched open the door, sliding it roughly enough that it bounced in its frame once it hit the door frame, and he clambered to his feet. He only needed to take a few steps inside to see Taichi’s stricken face as he sat at his desk.

Katsumichi wished to be collected in himself and ask coolly what sort of illness was remedied by sitting at a desk, but he could only think about the lie he had immediately proven false. If Taichi was going to lie about his health in order to avoid him it was not much more of a stretch to lie about knowledge of a pending war.

Kaori’s protests died in her mouth as she followed Katsumichi to the doorway. After a moment she apologised and backed out of the room and slid the door shut. Katsumichi wondered whether she would go to find something else to do or simply wait outside. He hoped she would find something else to do, not only because he wanted more privacy than a closed door, but also because he didn’t particularly want her to get bored as she waited. It would be better if she found Eri or Yukie and chatted with them.  

“Taichi,” Katsumichi said. He was finally within the room being stared at as though his state was non-corporeal. He could solidly feel the beating of his heart in his chest and the weight of his parched tongue in his mouth. He was very real. He wouldn’t stand to be ignored like an apparition. “Taichi, did you know all along?”

“What are you talking about?”

“You always lie to me, don’t you,” Katsumichi said. He kicked off his _geta_ redundantly and stepped slowly closer to Taichi. When he reached the desk he knelt beside his spouse. Perhaps he was hoping for a denial, no matter how false, or even an admission that he thought that lying was for the best. Taichi only stared at him, leaning back as though the encroachment of his spouse offended him. Katsumichi nodded, to show that he understood the situation. “This marriage, what is it?”

“I don’t understand the question.”

It was interesting that Taichi was able to open his mouth to that but not to any of the times that Katsumichi had called his name before that.

“Was this a favour, or am I a prisoner?”

“I have already said, many times, that I was looking for somebody to spend my life with. Upon hearing this, your kingdom approached me with the offer of marrying you,” Taichi said.

Katsumichi frowned. The words weren’t new. He remembered that he had been happy to hear such plainly emotionless words, but now he could only wonder whether they had always sounded this rehearsed. It was obvious that the marriage hadn’t been born from love, but Katsumichi didn’t understand why the reasons for the marriage sounded so vague now. Taichi had just happened to be looking for a spouse and the Kingdom of Johzenji just happened to suggest a union with Katsumichi.

“Tell me truthfully,” Katsumichi requested, “How did our marriage come about?”

“Must I tell you again?”

“If you wanted me to believe it, yes,” Katsumichi said. Then, “But even if you did I wouldn’t believe you.”

Taichi sighed and rubbed at his nose and sniffed loudly. He reached a hand out towards Katsumichi and waited. His face was determined and his hand did not so much as tremble as he stared up at Katsumichi, willing him to come closer. Considering how only moments ago he had recoiled at Katsumichi’s presence, Katsumichi did not feel much like stretching out his own fingers. He squeezed his fingers into fists and kept them stiffly at his sides. Taichi exhaled hard through his nose but he didn’t retract his hand.

“I wanted a quiet life away from the competition of the main palace. I wanted to live out my days peacefully. Right now, what I want is within my grasp,” Taichi said. He pointedly wriggled his fingers in the air between them but Katsumichi wasn’t about to hold his hand just because Taichi was asking nicely.

“How quietly could one live while their kingdom is embroiled in war?”

Taichi’s fingers withered and he dropped his hand. His gaze too had lowered and Katsumichi wondered if the true intention was to keep him ignorant about everything. But if Taichi would tell Prince Tsutomu, a young man who seemed to have far better principles than his brother, there was no way that Katsumichi would not have found out eventually.  

“Since when have you known?” Katsumichi asked. His voice cracked and he could feel his resolve crumbling as he realised he didn’t really want to know about these things.

“Katsumichi, you have to understand,” Taichi began lifting his hand once more. He didn’t seem put out that his advances had been rejected once more and he went on as though his extended hand had been taken. “Though we have been living in a period of peace until now, there have been disputes and disagreements over treaties and contracts since the end of the last war. There are things that couldn’t be helped such as people being displaced from their homes and becoming refugees. An act of kindness from one kingdom was seen as an act of evil by another.”

“How can those extremes be true when we all share the same language and creed?”

“With the division of the lands came the division of people who didn’t follow the kings. The slaves and the homeless are treated differently by each kingdom depending on how much help they can offer to these people, but no matter how much is given it isn’t enough. They still claim ownership of the lands where our families and their people have lived for many cycles of the calendar. But Karasuno claim that they are good and that they can support these people and reinstate them to their former dignity,” Taichi said. He slowly turned his palm up and waited. After no reaction he added, “Please.”

Katsumichi took his hand and knelt beside him.

“So this is about the barbarians?” Katsumichi asked. “We have people that we need to protect too. They didn’t care much when it was our people who were being attacked and starved and driven from their homes. What dignity do they have to be restored to?”

Despite the battles fought years before Katsumichi was born, the battles which aimed to secure the lives of the Johzenji people against the murdering and pillaging of the barbarians who inhabited the area, there still remained barbarians living in tiny collectives. Even into Katsumichi’s childhood he had heard of gangs of them crossing the boarders and attacking people from the villages to steal from them. He heard that some of the barbarians lived within Johzenji borders, working for the citizens for their own place in the world, though they were known to be dangerous people. Even the children were dangerous and prone to lashing out at other children and even adults. He hadn’t come into direct contact with any such people throughout his life and he understood that it was because of the risks they posed.  

The situation was probably the same in Shiratorizawa, and maybe even Niiyama. Katsumichi had learnt a long time ago that it was not the case in Karasuno. He hadn’t been exposed to much of the culture of the Heroic Kingdom but the time he had spent with Prince Chikara hadn’t passed without him opening his eyes.

Taichi pulled Katsumichi’s hand closer and pressed his lips to the knuckles.

“Katsumichi, personally I agree with Karasuno.”

“What?”

“A human is a human. Rather than aiming to protect their own wealth, there are people who should have offered up some of what they had and shown some humanity towards their own kind. People like your father have done some unscrupulous things,” Taichi said.

Katsumichi yanked his hand away. There were no scorch marks across the back of his hand but he could feel a strange tingle right through to his palm. He folded his hand away in his lap and peered at Taichi’s face, filled with reproach.

“ _My_ father?”

“As a king he did well to cultivate the culture of festivities in Johzenji, but… It was no secret that the way your kingdom treated those people was sickening. They didn’t deserve to be hunted and publically executed. They didn’t deserve to be enslaved in the ways that they were,” Taichi said.

“Is Shiratorizawa any better?”

“In shiratorizawa those people are allowed to live as slaves and earn their freedom and citizenship. It isn’t the most desirable arrangement but it is much better than killing them on a whim, because one doesn’t like the look in their eye or the tone of their voice,” Taichi said. In all his time Katsumichi had been listening for the barbs of superiority he had never been condescended to so heavily before.

It was as though the days had run steadily backwards and Katsumichi was in the exact situation he had been in before, locked into a place where he was never as good as his spouse. And for what reasons? The same reasons as before, no doubt. All because Taichi was a child of Shiratorizawa, raised to believe that he was from a peerless bloodline that the other kings were indebted to.

As much as even Katsumichi wanted a life that was peaceful and entirely his, it was a lofty dream for even a prince. Katsumichi knew that his life was subject to the whims of the local politics. Just like his mother, his life could yet be subject to the whims of misplaced rage. Any act of kindness could be repaid with violence. To have such high dreams, Katsumichi wondered how high Taichi’s upbringing had reached.

“Some of those people didn’t deserve even the kindness they were shown,” Katsumichi said. Taichi frowned but Katsumichi didn’t want to bring up something irrelevant. Taichi didn’t need to know that the barbarians he seemed to care for so dearly had killed Katsumichi’s mother and Katsumichi had almost succumbed to the same fate – worse yet, Katsumichi didn’t want to hear that Taichi didn’t care about such a thing – so Katsumichi refocused himself. “Which kingdoms are allied?”

“Nothing is certain at this point,” Taichi said hesitantly.

“How do you think the lines will be drawn?” Katsumichi asked.

He already knew his own thoughts on the matter. After an enlightening visit to Karasuno’s outskirts, he was almost certain that Karasuno would have access to the extensive private armies of Aoba and Date as well as Niiyama. Despite Date’s marriage with Shiratorizawa through Lady Mai it was very possible that the old house had nothing to lose. By backing both sides there was a chance they could maintain their current status or be reinstated to a kingdom. The disgraced houses of Date and Aoba were in an advantageous position no matter how one looked at it.

Taichi sighed. He said, “I am sure that Johzenji and Shiratorizawa will be on the same side. There is no reason for us not to be.”

“Could you promise something like that?”

Of course Taichi couldn’t promise something like that. He would never have to make a heavily political decision in his life. He had longed for a life of peace and quiet, away from the complexities of the main palace, but the consequences of that were to be excluded from bearing any influence. He was as good as worthless, yet his face was hard as he nodded at Katsumichi. “I promise.”


	13. An Audience with the King

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With the threat of war looming, Katsumichi wants to confirm the support of Shiratorizawa.

Katsumichi didn’t think much of Taichi’s promise. He himself was a worthless man so he knew how little the words should mean. But perhaps making the promise at all had awoken something in Taichi – some long-dormant desire to be a good and influential person – and he seemed almost like a new man the next morning when he announced arrangements to go to the main palace.

“Why are we going to the main palace?” Katsumichi asked steadily. He didn’t particularly want to get his hopes up. He very sensibly picked through the tray of food that had been provided for his breakfast – chunks of beef whose fat had infused the spring onions and daikon with their flavour, as though Katsumichi was particularly wont for energy – and very patiently waited for the answer without any expectations.

“I believe it would steady your heart to be somewhat involved in the current political matters concerning our kingdoms,” Taichi said loftily.

“Would it?”

Taichi hesitated. “I don’t actually know. I just thought you’d want to directly hear things like this. And even if you don’t, we could go to see Prince Reon and Lady Mai. If you wanted to.”

“How long are we going for?”

“A few days? It is for as long as you’d like, really. But it might take some time before the King is willing to speak to us,” Taichi said.

Katsumichi had wondered whether Taichi’s unwillingness to be involved in the administrative matters of the kingdom had anything to do with the apparently non-existent relationship he had with his father. Though Katsumichi wasn’t too ambitious on that front because he knew how futile aiming for a big role in the kingdom would be, that was more to do with his own ineptitude than disliking the King. But Taichi always seemed to be a smart man, just not inclined to get involve with things that he didn’t care about, and maybe he was a tad lazy, but he did appear to care about Shiratorizawa regardless of what he actually said. If he was fonder of the King on a more personal level, Katsumichi wondered whether Taichi would have exhibited more ambitious behaviour.

If Taichi had acted more interested in the kingdom, been more truthful about his feelings, perhaps the King would have liked him a bit more and been keener to speak with him.

But Katsumichi didn’t mind, that his spouse was not one of the favoured sons of the kingdom, nor that it would take some time to find out where the alliances lay.

“Thank you,” He said quietly.

“There’s no need to thank me. You’d do the same for me.”

Katsumichi didn’t say that he didn’t think he would need to because such a situation wouldn’t arise in Johzenji. He just thought it privately and wondered whether that was just another thing he would be wrong about when it came to his own kingdom. 

Though the trip was estimated to take a few days, it was only Eri who accompanied Katsumichi and Taichi on their way to the main palace. Runa had said nothing about being left behind and bid Katsumichi farewell with a tight hug and a downturned mouth when it was time for him to leave. 

 

Upon arrival to the main palace, Taichi’s mother was standing beside Prince Reon and Lady Mai. She wasn’t dressed quite as decadently as usual and her face was drawn. She managed to pull her lips into a small smile as she welcomed her son into a loose embrace.

“I hope the journey saw you well,” She said quietly.

“It was fine,” Taichi said stiffy. He stepped back and frowned down at Lady Yue. “Only, I was not expecting a reception from you, Mother.”

“Did you really think I would ignore news of my precious son coming to my home?”

Katsumichi was standing slightly behind them and he saw Taichi’s significant look over at Prince Reon, so it was no wonder that Lady Yue saw it too. She swatted Taichi’s arm and huffed. “Taichi! Can you not at least pretend to be happy to see me?”

“I will endeavour to exert as much effort into that as you do to being happy about my marriage,” Taichi muttered with the barest movement of his lips. Lady Yue’s eyes widened and her chapped lips parted in surprise before she bit at them to combat the trembling of her jaw.

“I am happy for you,” She hissed.

Katsumichi was confused. Lady Yue had been nothing short of lovely to Katsumichi each time they met aside from the initial slap. If Katsumichi focused he could still feel the sting from the crack of her hand across his cheek. He had learnt his lesson the once, though it had been a misunderstanding. At the memory his eyes involuntarily moved to her hands that were curling into ineffectual fists before her. Her fingers were bare.

Forgetting the strange conversation in front of him, Katsumichi couldn’t believe it had taken him so long to notice the modest dress, barely five layers comprised her _juunihitoe_ and her hair was much more plainly styled than the elaborate up-do that she used to wear held up with glittering pins.

“Taichi,” Katsumichi said. Prince Reon and Lady Mai must have been well practiced at closing their ears as they were barely reacting to what was happening in front of them. Not that Katsumichi was any less aware of their presence as they patiently waited. “She says she is happy about it. Shouldn’t we listen to her.”

Taichi glanced back and had the gall to look as though he was surprised. “But–”

“She’s your mother.”

Taichi shook his head but Katsumichi hoped that he had understood at least something of the situation. It did not look as though she was being treated well at the palace. Her skin was sallow and she didn’t bear all the wealth that one would expect when they were bed-mates with a king. To have nothing and to have a son who was intent on distancing himself from her… Katsumichi wondered what existed for Lady Yue’s happiness.

But Taichi sighed and then turned to bow shortly to his mother. “I apologise. Thank you for coming to see us.”

Lady Yue nodded slowly but when Katsumichi met her gaze she looked away quickly.

“Yes, well. I had best return. I have some matters to be seeing to within the palace,” Lady Yue said. She excused herself quickly and walked briskly towards the stone steps that led to the main hall. But she diverted her route at the last moment and skirted around the edge.

“You don’t need to defend her, you know,” Taichi said sharply. Katsumichi blinked up at him, trying to pretend he was not confused by what his spouse was saying but Taichi only sighed and shook his head. When Katsumichi’s eyes tried to follow Lady Yue again, she was gone. All he could see was the grey stone steps enclosed by the deep maroon of the walls that marked the courtyard and lined the corridors.

“Katsumichi.”

“What?” His voice had come a bit too quickly and even he knew how annoyed he sounded. Taichi’s face hardened slightly, just the tensing of his jaw this time rather than his face closing off entirely. “Sorry.”

“You shouldn’t blindly defend people. You don’t know half the things she has said about you. I already know that she’s my mother, and she always will be, but I can’t just play nice with her when she has wished death on you.”

“What?”

“Prince Taichi,” Lady Mai said reproachfully. Katsumichi remembered how he’d thought Lady Yue had asked Lady Mai to keep an eye on him. Lady Mai had made it seem as though it was to look out for him as an outsider in this kingdom. That was all it could be though. Lady Yue had been sorry for striking Katsumichi at their first meeting. She has only ever been cordial to his face since then. But Lady Mai must have known what Taichi was about to say, that must have been why her face flushed and she had reached out with placating hands.

“You were on the verge of death, your body struggling to fight off the poison, and she was saying it was a good opportunity. She wanted you to die, Katsumichi. It didn’t matter that we were married and trying our best together. She said that you dying might make me realise how fleeting life is and I would want to aim for the crown. If I didn’t know better I would have thought she was the one who poisoned you.”

“Is that what you thought all along, was it, before you knew better?” Prince Reon asked far too lightly. He patted Taichi on the shoulder and smiled. “That’s why you went around slapping servants and trying to attack your brothers, is it? Because you thought it was your mother?”

“Shut up.”

“Is that any way to speak to your elder brother?”

Taichi only glowered from underneath his brother’s arm. Prince Reon laughed heartily and winked at Lady Mai.

It was alright for them to laugh as though everything was fine. They didn’t appear to be surprised by what Taichi had said. There was an element of pretence in everything around a palace and pretending that nothing could shake a person was one of the first tenets a young royal was expected to understand. Normally, Katsumichi could pretend that nothing surprised him at all. But he had never before been told that somebody had hoped he had died. That things would be better if he died.

Lady Yue was probably right. Taichi marrying a man removed his possibility of rule. Though that made Taichi less of a threat around the palace, a prince like Taichi being unwilling to take on a political role in addition to marrying a person of the same gender meant there was not much he could do to secure his own position. If officials decided that Lady Yue was a nuisance to have around they could deploy her servants elsewhere, deprive her of the usual foods to which she was accustomed, withhold her clothing, and reduce her contact with others who could help her among other things. Taichi couldn’t protect his mother so it would be better for her if Katsumichi had died. If Taichi married a woman and there was even the slimmest possibility he could have a child it would be extra pressure on whoever sat on the throne.

Taichi couldn’t protect anybody. Katsumichi couldn’t decide whether that was because he didn’t get on with the King or he didn’t get on with the King because he couldn’t protect anybody.

“I’m sorry,” Taichi said in a low voice as they followed behind Lady Mai and Prince Reon.

“What for?”

“Nobody wants to hear thing like that, that somebody wishes them to be dead,” Taichi said. The swing of his arms was minimal as he slowed his stride. His little finger stroked along the back of Katsumichi’s hand until Katsumichi gave in and linked their fingers together loosely.

“Of course not, but what am I supposed to do when she has every right to think that?”

“You could stop trying to make me be nice to her?” Taichi suggested. “I know that you would want me to be nice because she is my mother and she raised me, but you are my family now. Just you. She chose the King.”

Katsumichi noticed the stutter in Prince Reon’s footsteps ahead but he didn’t add anything. It was up to Katsumichi to say, “The King didn’t choose her.”

“That is something that is between them,” Taichi said. “I don’t care.”

Taichi knew very well that it wasn’t the case. He must have been obtuse out of some odd sense of duty, Katsumichi supposed. There was nothing that was ever just between a king and a woman. Lady Yue wasn’t the only woman around the King, and she wasn’t even close to being one at the top of the palace heirarchy. There were three queens ahead of her and other wives who were all vying for a place in the palace. It was between Lady Yue and the other ladies of the kingdom more than anything.

“Are you sure that you don’t care?” Katsumichi asked quietly.

“I’m sure. I only care about you.”

Taichi instantly flushed at the sound of Lady Mai spluttering. Prince Reon looked back sheepishly while his wife didn’t even seem to be attempting to stem her laughter. She was doubled over with great gasps of laughs and it was up to Prince Reon to pat her back and grimace sympathetically at Taichi and Katsumichi.

“She’s not laughing at you, she’s laughing with you,” Prince Reon said sombrely.

“But we’re not laughing,” Katsumichi said. He glanced up at Taichi and saw that he was still gaping like a very embarrassed fish. 

“Ah, yes,” Prince Reon agreed. “But perhaps you are laughing on the inside?”

“I do not think so.”

“Are you sure? My wife wouldn’t be laughing like this for no reason. She is very well attuned to the inner-emotions of others.”

It sounded like a terrible lie. Lady Mai was still giggling, though the sound was quieter now and she was standing straight with the flush of mirth clear to see across her features. Katsumichi wasn’t laughing at all and Taichi seemed more mortified than anything. Unless there was somebody hiding in the vicinity who was laughing, Katsumichi couldn’t imagine that Lady Mai was well attuned to anything other than her own humour.  

“I’m sorry,” Lady Mai said breathlessly. “You two make a funny pair in the first place, but saying things like, ‘I only care about you,’ don’t you think that is too much, Prince Taichi? Saying that you only care about Prince Katsumichi? Dear, is this what young love is like?”

Lady Mai clutched at Prince Reon’s arm and pretended to swoon while Prince Reon only smiled and patted her hand.

“We are the same age as you, Lady Mai.”

“Of course you are,” Lady Mai said, standing up straight and grinning at her spouse. “You think that they are a bit too cute as well, don’t you, Dear?”

Prince Reon hesitated before saying, “Maybe not cute. You seem a bit naïve, perhaps?”

“That’s even worse!” Taichi protested hotly.

“Well, I’m sure there are other people you care about aside from Prince Katsumichi,” Prince Reon said.

“I care about whoever Katsumichi cares about,” Taichi muttered obstinately. Lady Mai giggled again and punched at Prince Reon’s arm. Taichi glowered at the ground and Katsumichi tugged at his arm.

“You are a bit cute, Taichi.”

 

Whilst dining with Lady Mai and Prince Reon, Katsumichi and Taichi managed to avoid any real explanation for their presence at the palace. It seemed to be no secret that they were hiding the true intention but there was no prying. Katsumichi was glad that he was allowed even this much.

He didn’t particularly have an appetite, and neither did Taichi. Lady Mai looked concerned but she didn’t delve further into the issue and she allowed her guests to sit quietly. Katsumichi’s mouth was dry and he could barely keep up with the conversation. All he could think was what he as supposed to do or say if the King deigned to see him.  

He couldn’t even do much more than offer a pained smile to Lady Mai whenever she spoke to him directly. It wasn’t really fair to her, to be trying so hard and to have nothing in response aside from Katsumichi. What made it even worse was that not even Taichi was doing much to return the kindness from their hosts.

“You’ll be fine,” Taichi said in a low voice.

It was though he didn’t even remember the last time Katsumichi spoke with the King – or he didn’t care. It didn’t matter. It was better to think positively about these things. Katsumichi tried once more to smile as he nodded.

Days later when he was kneeling alone before the King, Katsumichi wondered what positivity felt like.

“I have heard whisperings of war coming to the region,” Katsumichi said. His voice wavered and he hated how weak he sounded. He couldn’t even remain calm and immovable at a time like this. He was already acquiescing to the current in the King’s squinted gaze. His eyesight must have been failing him, that was all that Katsumichi could think when the solidly ingrained frown was fixed upon him from such a great height.

“Is that all?”

Katsumichi paused for a moment. There was no need to reply so quickly when something of the utmost urgency had been trivialised with the barest of inflection. He shook his head and straightened his back.

“ _Heika_ , I implore you to understand the concerns that I have; the people of the dead kingdoms are dangerous. It is a fact that I know just as well as anybody else, yet they have the support of legitimate thrones,” Katsumichi said. “I would like to confirm that Johzenji has a friend in Shiratorizawa.”

The King tilted his head to the side as though he would get a different view from the marginal angle. He straightened his neck again before he intoned, “If friendship is what you desire, I’m sure you can acquire that well enough on your own, Prince Katsumichi.”

“Allies, then,” Katsumichi said, resigned to being more direct though he did not feel certain of it. “I would hope that The Virtuous Kingdom of Johzenji could rely on the assistance and mutual tactics of The Fearsome Kingdom of Johzenji.”

The King stared down at Katsumichi for a moment before he leisurely reached out for a cup that a blank-faced servant was holding out to him. He sipped slowly before setting the cup down again. “You are right, Prince Katsumichi. I would have preferred diplomatic proceedings to occur much more quickly between the two kingdoms, but it appears that you are the only one who is concerned about the safety of your people,” He said slowly. There was a moment where his eyes bulged and his cheeks puffed against a cough he tried to internalise. And then his gaze returned to the lethargic scrutiny that made Katsumichi wish to be elsewhere.

“I am certain that the King of Johzenji also wishes for better diplomacy between the two kingdoms,” Katsumichi asserted as best he could.

“If that was the case, surely he would have accepted the hand of kindness that Shiratorizawa has extended to him,” The King said slowly.

“What do you mean?”

“Your brother is not fit to rule a kingdom. He will eventually starve the people and the resources will dwindle. Johzenji is already insignificant. Any more of his tyranny will result in the death of a kingdom and one of my children will find himself married to a child of a dead kingdom. Does that sound acceptable to you?”

Katsumichi couldn’t hide his surprise. He swallowed at the lump in his throat and tried not to fidget too much. There had been no official announcements made regarding the throne so there should not have been any knowledge of Crown Prince Yuuji’s true position in the other kingdoms. It seemed unlikely that Taichi would have mentioned anything to the king of Shiratorizawa and it was doubtful that Prince Tsutomu had much to say on the matter. He might have had ambitions but Katsumichi wasn’t even sure that Prince Tsutomu was aware of the situation.

But more than that, calling Katsumichi’s brother a tyrant was too much. Things were quieter around the palace but surely it was only a measure to maintain some secrecy. Johzenji’s position had already been slipping while the health of the King deteriorated. Now it was just up to King Yuuji to wait until one of the other kings to pass to maintain their position. But waiting in order to protect the secret was useless when the secret had become common knowledge.

“I beg your pardon, but tyranny has never existed in Johzenji,” Katsumichi said quietly. His voice was shaking and the pressure of his words was choking as he breathed out the defence. Everything that King Yuuji had done, everything that Katsumichi had been turning his eyes from since he had once returned home, could be undone by the whim of the most battle-hardened of the kings in the region. All because Katsumichi saw fit to ask for the help of somebody with experience in the field.

“Perhaps the tyranny was not noticed within,” The King pronounced slowly, deliberately, “But without, the heinous deeds have been monitored for some time. Other kingdoms in the region have maintained a dialogue with representatives of the Dead Kingdoms and have even allowed some of their own nobility to be naturalised. Johzenji instead saw fit to routinely slaughter those more unfortunate than themselves. Does that not sound like tyranny to you, Prince Katsumichi?”

“It was never like that, _Heika_ ,” Katsumichi said quickly. He realised he had spoken out of turn but already the air around him had turned cold. The King was wrong. There was only one official record of a barbarian being killed by Johzenji and Katsumichi couldn’t see any way that the single time it had happened hadn’t been justified. Execution was a valid punishment if the crime fit. The land had always been Johzenji’s and there was only one thing that could be done to avenge the victims of murders where invasions had occurred.

Katsumichi couldn’t raise his gaze to the King and could only murmur. “They killed my mother. We only killed those that killed our own. We too allow the people left behind to make lives in our kingdom. But they killed my mother.”

“What does that matter?”

Katsumichi’s eyes felt hot but the warm weight of his face was too much to raise to view the King. Pins and needles tingled in his legs but he could not move from his _seiza_ and he could not allow himself to cry here.

The King sounded bored. He went on, “What you must understand is that Johzenji is guilty of many crimes. Killing for the sake of killing. Though offers of assistance have been all but declined, The Fearsome Kingdom of Shiratorizawa would like to save you, even now.”

“I do not understand, _Heika_.”

“Shiratorizawa intends to take the government of the kingdom. We shall be able to rehabilitate the system to one with more justice and,” He slowly licked his lips before finishing, “Virtue.”

“How…”

“We will use force if necessary. It will be for the good of your kingdom and for the region as a whole.”

There wasn’t much else that the King could have meant besides military intervention. As though Johzenji was a menacing presence to the other kingdoms. As though Johzenji wasn’t one of the kingdoms that had helped when the region had been under attack all those years before. As though The Fearsome Kingdom of Shiratorizawa knew anything of virtue itself.

“The war that is coming, is it a war waged solely on Johzenji? On behalf of the bar- people of the dead kingdoms?” Katsumichi asked. He didn’t particularly care for monitoring his tone at this point. There wasn’t a jot of difference that he could make even though he was successful in being able to have an audience with the King.

“If Shiratorizawa takes hold of the administration of Johzenji, there will be no such use for battles. Johzenji will become territory of Shiratorizawa and in the interim any misunderstandings of local politics can be resolved.”

“My family wouldn’t accept that.”

The King’s eyes widened for a moment before his mouth curled into a grin. “Do you think you are in any position to tell me what your family will and will not accept? Do you think we are bargaining equally? Prince Katsumichi, just quietly understand your position. Johzenji’s military are less than nothing. They might seem powerful when slashing down unarmed barbarians, but that is all you are to the powers of Shiratorizawa,” The King said gleefully. “Just be glad that you can continue to leech off my son and maintain royal status.”

Katsumichi was mostly annoyed that he still felt like crying. With all this it was difficult to even delude himself into thinking he could stand up to the King. “My family would not be allowed the same grace,” Katsumichi said, because the King wasn’t going to say it for him.

“Is being saved from being cast out and executed not good enough for you?”

“It would be kinder to kill me along with the rest of my family.”

The King’s gaze sharpened once more and even his voice sliced against Katsumichi as he spat out his words. “Be grateful for what Shiratorizawa has allowed you until now.”


	14. Options

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Katsumichi must do whatever he can to save Johzenji

Katsumichi had no other options. He was trapped in Shiratorizawa, though he supposed it was no different to being trapped in Johzenji with the threat of being killed so that the throne could be ousted. He couldn’t see how the practicalities would come about – he couldn’t see how Shiratorizawa could propose to annex a kingdom that was geographically awkward to attain, but the King had spoken with enough certainty for Katsumichi’s blood to freeze in his veins.

Taichi didn’t seem to suspect anything, he had been satisfied with a vague answer about how the meeting had gone. He had been easy to manipulate with more carnal distractions. It hadn’t done anything to distract Katsumichi. He had tried not to think about what the King of Shiratorizawa had said to him but the harder Katsumichi tried to forget, the faster the King’s words adhered themselves to insides of his eyelids and the very drums of his ears.

The few nights that had passed since that day were spent waking at each small creak of the wind with images of razed villages and the desperate wailing of people that Katsumichi had failed to protect.

They were no different to the barbarians of the land. Titles and rites had no meaning other than to distinguish one group as being superior to another. Deep down everybody felt greed the same way. Everybody hungered for home and even when they were full up of what they had they craved yet more for the things they could take from others.

And Katsumichi couldn’t claim to be any different. He had recently found himself wanting more and more from Taichi – more time, more attention, more tiny breaths of affection – and he wanted more from what he had thought to be a beneficial relationship. He had been hoping for aid and assistance and allies for his people. He had been foolish. But he wouldn’t be foolish for too much longer.  

Runa came to see Katsumichi while he was still writing his letter. The characters on the page were messy and smudged no matter how painstakingly Katsumichi had drawn the strokes. Aware that Runa was able to read his terrible handwriting after years of practice, Katsumichi pulled another sheet over the top of the letter and rested his forearms on it and fixed a smile to his face.

“Good morning, Prince Katsumichi,” Runa said. She sounded quite restrained as she pulled at her layers and layers of skirts to sit at the other side of the desk.

“Runa, what can I do for you today?”

She squinted at Katsumichi and pouted a little bit. It was a cheeky expression that Katsumichi hadn’t seen much of. Though he hadn’t seen much of Runa at all. She leaned forward as though she was about to share a secret and said, “You are acting awfully strange lately, _Aniue_.”

“How so?”

“Yukie told me you are sending me to Johzenji. Why?”

“Don’t you miss it? I thought it might be nice for you to take a break from your ‘studies’ to return home for a time,” Katsumichi said.

“We have hardly been back at the West River for a handful of days and yet you think I need a break to return home?” Runa said. “And you don’t think the timing of this break would be particularly strange? War is imminent, and before anything drastic happens I should return to somewhere you think is safer; is that what you are thinking?”

Runa had always been sharper than Katsumichi. She knew the meaning behind the things he tried to do secretly. In the past she had always been kinder and let Katsumichi’s plans play through. She had accepted when he claimed to have broken the sword he had been given to train with when they were children, and she had reported vaguely when asked about her visit to Niiyama and she didn’t even blink when he tried to casually ask if any children of Karasuno had happened to be present. More recently, Runa’s kindness had been not questioning the validity of Katsumichi’s marriage.

But now she was asking him.

“I just thought that it would be good for you to spend some more time in Johzenji,” Katsumichi said.

Runa closed her eyes for a long moment and her red mouth pulled a sad line across her face before she said, “ _Aniue_ , why don’t you come with me?”

“I have Prince Taichi to think about.”

“Doesn’t Prince Taichi also have to think about you?” Runa asked sharply. “Couldn’t he consider what it would take for you to be safe with your family?”

Katsumichi wanted to be with Runa too. He wanted to continue the life he had left, the one where he wasn’t much use but he was able to live alongside his siblings and feel fulfilled in the most basic capacity. But the life he had left no longer existed. It had vanished when Katsumichi had not even thought it was something he needed to protect. Though it was different to the past they both remembered, sending Runa back to Johzenji was the best that he could do for her.

“You can take Prince Tsutomu with you if you’d like,” Katsumichi said. “You would hardly notice my absence.” Runa looked as though she would protest, so Katsumichi added, “If I am to join you I would have to bring Prince Taichi with me. It might take me some time to convince him because his life is here. But we will join you eventually. You should return first and make sure everybody else knows to be impressed by how wonderful married life has made me.”

Runa smiled despite herself and sighed.

“ _Aniue_ , you shan’t be forgiven if you do not return to Johzenji before the war begins.”

“That is perfectly fine, Runa. I don’t intend to make you begrudge me.”

Runa hummed and nodded. “I will really come back here to kill you myself if you don’t keep your promise.”

When Katsumichi was certain that Runa had gone – once he had counted to as high a number as he could manage without feeling like his heart would beat right out of his chest – he returned to writing the letter. He grimaced at the trembling strokes already on the page and hoped his message didn’t look too pathetic.

 

_“King Yuuji, The Shining One, Seventh ruler of the Virtuous Kingdom of Johzenji,_

_I hope this letter finds you well. I must confess that my reasons for correspondence are not good, so if you at least were in relatively good spirits my words might not hurt you. In all the time I have lived in Shiratorizawa I believe that this will be the first and last letter that we share. The thought that it is such a novel occasion doubles my hope that you are healthy and the strain of being the monarch our kingdom looks too is not taking its toll on you._

_As much as I would prefer to take the time to let you know how dear you are to me, I must ask for your help._

_Aniue it seems that I have discovered what my burden is. The duty I have is to think not only of my people, but to also do whatever I can to protect your place as my ruler. After discovering all that I could about the subterfuge exacted by Shiratorizawa I can say that I can wilfully bear the weight of not sitting on the throne._

_Shiratorizawa mean to take Johzenji as their own. They wish to eject you and our brothers and all of the relatives and ministers who governed Johzenji and forged it into the kingdom we know today. I will do what I can to combat the crime that is about to be committed but I must ask a favour of you. Do away with any agreements you have with the Fearsome Kingdom. Reinforce the garrisons and do whatever you can to strengthen our military. I would advise assistance from the noble families of the area if I believed they would come to our aid. I fear that is not the case and though we have trusted them in the past they too will turn on us in time._

_All I can hope to do is to provide you with more time. I am sure that you will think of something but denouncing Shiratorizawa ought to do the trick. I was already poisoned once and though it has been claimed that I was not the intended target there is no evidence to support this due to the nature of the crime. There are circumstances that are privy only to the highest officials and the people they trust to share the information with._

_Aniue, I hope you understand what I am saying._

_Time is all I can hope to grant you. I will give you all the time that I have left. I shall succumb to the poison more thoroughly and once news of this is announced you must know who is at fault. I am allowing it because I must help you to protect our kingdom. I will hope that our brothers do not mourn for too long as the trifling aspects of paying respects might get in the way of fortifying our kingdom. The same too for Runa. I hope you can make her understand why I had to spend this life that she saved._

_Once more, our mother will be able to care for me and I will be stained in the love that I have longed for._

_Please do not think poorly of Prince Taichi. Though our time has been short I have found it has suited me. He too might be shocked so I hope that despite the splintering of our kingdoms that he might one day find friendship extended by Johzenji._

_All my love,_

_Fifth Child and Fourth Prince Katsumichi of the Virtuous Kingdom of Johzenji.”_

 

Just writing out the words had drained Katsumichi but he needed to be swift. He had already left it too long before informing Johzenji of what Shiratorizawa planned. It had been a few days since Katsumichi had returned from the main palace with Taichi and it had only been the day after the audience with the King that he had woken with a silly thought in his head and sought to procure the very thing that made him dislike being born at all. It was just difficult to build up the courage so Katsumichi had left the small vial he had stolen in his room and wondered whether it was the right decision.

There was nothing else that he was good for.  

He carefully folded up the letter and was thankful that his hand hadn’t trembled too much as he wrote King Yuuji’s name. Once the ink had dried he walked through the palace in search of one of the stable hands. The boy was young and quiet and he hardly made an impression. He was perfect and Katsumichi suspected the boy had been used for the purpose of carrying secret messages many times before now.

“I’ll give you the gold upon your return,” Katsumichi lied to the unimpressed arch of eyebrows that was turned on him by the boy. He intended for poison to have taken affect and claimed him before the letter even reached Johzenji, but the boy didn’t have to know that. The boy didn’t even know the contents of the letter, but Katsumichi felt nervous about it anyway.

The boy took the letter and disappeared easily.

For a day and a half everything was fine. Katsumichi had a plan to save his kingdom and his family. His eyes didn’t sting at all as he bade Runa farewell and promised to join her as soon as he had convinced Taichi to accompany him.

 

 

Taichi’s eyes were startlingly red against the starkness of his damp face as he clutched the familiar letter in his hands.

Katsumichi had known all along that Taichi would read the letter before it was passed on to be delivered to King Yuuji. There really was no way for letters to get in and out of Shiratorizawa without being read by Taichi. It might have been different if Katsumichi had been able to immediately provide gold for the delivery, but, if not Taichi, some other person bearing an official title at the Shiratorizawa palace would have read the letter and the contents would probably have implicated Taichi somehow. He had hoped that Taichi would understand the letter if he saw it and quietly have it delivered to Johzenji without any intervention. But instead he was wearing a curiously static expression as he stared down at Katsumichi.

To have his morning of staring aimlessly at the West River interrupted in this way was as novel as it was unwelcome.

“What is the meaning of this?” Taichi asked.

“Shouldn’t you be able to confirm the meaning for yourself? You are literate, aren’t you?”

“Katsumichi!” Taichi all but roared. Katsumichi turned back to look at the swell of the current as the river ran past him. Taichi sank to his knees and grasped Katsumichi’s shoulders. “Why did you write this letter?”

“To let my king know of the situation. Geography would hinder the plans of your king, but he seems determined. The abolition of political ties would be best to put a stop to it,” Katsumichi said calmly. Taichi’s fingers tightened their grip on Katsumichi’s _kariginu_ but he didn’t pay it any mind. “Shiratorizawa will be too busy fighting off the enemies that surround them to bother taking Johzenji by force. It will at least give us a few years to formulate a more elegant solution.”

“You can’t mean that.”

“So you too think that I should allow the kingdom I have known from birth to succumb to tyrannical rule?” Katsumichi asked. He supposed he didn’t need to keep it a secret that he was not at all fond of the king of Shiratorizawa. At their first meeting he had been meek in his fear. Being humble as he pled for mercy did nothing to soften the glare of the aged man who had simply decided that Johzenji wouldn’t be able to pull itself free of the mess even with help.

If Shiratorizawa was no ally to Johzenji there was no reason for Katsumichi to support Shiratorizawa. His loyalty was in the blood he shared with his brothers and sisters and inside him was the duty he had regretfully never shown his people. He had his chance to hope they forgave him for being useless until now if he could save them like this.

He was a dead man on borrowed time. He wouldn’t waste his precious last breaths on being polite about a man he hated.

“Tsutomu told me that he would be spending some time in Johzenji and I assumed it was just him and Princess Runa being odd, but… You sent Yukie and Kaori with them. Are you trying to save them?”

“Runa loves him. I can’t have him stay here where he could easily be punished for whatever transgressions the King decides he has committed in his love for Runa.”

“What about me?” Taichi asked on the back of a whine. He pressed his forehead to Katsumichi’s shoulder and his back heaved with silent sobs. Katsumichi had never seen Taichi like this before. They hadn’t been married for long so he supposed there was a lot about the other man that he didn’t know. There was a lot that he would never find out, he supposed. But he wasn’t crying. He wanted to be able to cry and grieve for the days they would never spend together but he only felt cold.

“Katsumichi,” Taichi whispered. “What about me?”

“They probably won’t punish you, at least, not right away. You would be a widower so they will likely take pity on you. You should tell them that I was driven mad with paranoia after the first time I was poisoned and death snatched me away in the midst of my malady,” Katsumichi said.

He had thought it all through and giving Taichi a way out like that, so that Shiratorizawa would blame Katsumichi and Taichi could remarry and try again for his dream, was for the best. He had initially considered a story that Taichi had put Katsumichi out of his misery because of night terrors that haunted him even in his waking moments left him unable to respond to those who cared for him the most, but having Taichi say he killed Katsumichi might eventually lead to some repercussion or other. If Shiratorizawa believed Katsumichi to have taken his own life in a moment of madness and Johzenji thought he had been assassinated by the poison he was victim to the first time, the diplomatic ties could be swiftly severed.

The sound of the river’s flow faded from Katsumichi’s ears beneath the muffled sobbing of Taichi against his shoulder. But he could see the river so he knew it to continue its journey to the sea. It had been a while since Katsumichi had last gone. Thinking back, it had been years and years.

He felt sorry to the memory of his mother that he had not returned to the place where he was born, to the village where his mother spent her youth, since he had gone with Prince Chikara. 

“Taichi,” Katsumichi said quietly. There was a stutter in Taichi’s sobs as he raised his head to meet his gaze. His face was crumpled and blotchy and glistening with snot. Katsumichi was glad he was able to see this much from the man whose face had been so stoic and aloof in the time since they met.

“What is it, Katsumichi?”

“I’d like to go to the sea.”

Taichi nodded frantically, bringing himself closer and his eyes widening. “Yes, let’s go to the sea. We can just spend some time together and you will realise–”

“No, Taichi. There is no time for that. _Kofun_ are so outdated these days, aren’t they? After my cremation I would like to be taken to the sea.”

Taichi shook his head, the corners of his lips tugging down until he spluttered on a loud sob. “You can’t. I love you.”

“I love you too,” Katsumichi agreed. “It is regretful that our time together has been so short. You should ask King Yuuji to help you to find another spouse once you have mourned. But can I be selfish and ask that you don’t marry one of my brothers? Forgetting the political ties I would like you to be mine alone from a Johzenji point of view. Anybody else should be fine so long as they take care of you.”

“I won’t. I won’t remarry and you won’t die,” Taichi wailed. “I am only yours, do you understand?”

Of course Katsumichi understood that Taichi felt that way _now_ , but his heart would beat more strongly once his grief had passed. He would become a stronger man and maybe even take a more proactive stance in life. Perhaps with his next spouse he might even shed himself of the habit of cloistering himself away from them.

Katsumichi lifted his hand and patted Taichi’s back gently. “You have a dream, don’t you? To live quietly with somebody that you love.”

That only seemed to worsen matters as Taichi pressed himself closer and practically howled. The layers of silk at Katsumichi’s chest were sodden with warmth, though he still felt chilled to the tips of his fingers. He wanted Taichi to stop crying now. There would be plenty of time to grieve once the bereavement had actually come, yet Taichi was wailing like the wounded as he squeezed Katsumichi into his sopping embrace.

“Taichi, I don’t want you to be too hurt by this.”

“How can I not be?” Taichi spat. His hands trembled as he raised them to hold Katsumichi’s face, to fix his gaze and keep him near. “I won’t let you do this.”

“Then you’ll let my kingdom fall to yours? Can you live with that much blood on your hands?”

Katsumichi knew that he couldn’t. He honestly had come to love Taichi so easily but he had to do something to help his kingdom. He regretted having to lie so emphatically to Runa and how he had completely ignored Yukie lest he give himself away entirely. He regretted that he hadn’t been able to demand answers from King Yuuji about the direction his life had taken and he regretted not being able to cherish his siblings more when he was with them. But no matter how much he regretted having to abort his happiness he would regret the bloodshed of a war already lost much more. He wouldn’t be able to live with himself if he did nothing while the kingdom he had loved for his entire life suffered.

But Taichi nodded. His breaths shuddered as he bit at the inside of his cheek and tightened his jaw. He kept his hands on Katsumichi’s face and all Katsumichi could do was close his eyes to the admission.

“I could do it,” Taichi hissed. “I could live my life, bathed in the blood of every person living in this world if it meant I was able to be yours for just that bit longer.”

“Please don’t say things like that.”

“Why? You’ve known all along that I am selfish and I care nothing for the throne and my brothers and being called a prince,” Taichi said. The moment of stasis passed and he couldn’t stop the tremble of his jaw with the great shuddering of his chest as he inhaled. A burst of air escaped him and he shook his head. “I will do anything you ask so long as you do not leave me.”

And Katsumichi wanted to stay. He wanted to sit at the open veranda on the sweltering days, in the shade of the _sudare_ and listen to the rain pelting the earth while Taichi’s skin was within reach in the mornings once they woke. He wanted to go for walks in the evenings through the mountains and pluck flowering sprigs to tease Taichi with as he held his nose and complained about his eyes already beginning to water. He wanted to entertain visitors to their estate happily, pretending he agreed with the guests while silently making faces to Taichi about how dull the duties were. He wanted to warm his hands against Taichi’s stomach in the winter while Taichi put off pretending to read the correspondence that had continuously piled up as they lazed away.

Katsumichi wanted to fall in love a little bit more every single day, the increments of his affection surprising him when he thinks he can’t possibly want to remain he any more than he already does. He wanted his days to grow longer and longer until his bones ached and his skin had stretched and thinned until he could feel the certain beating of Taichi’s heart through the cold, dry touch of their linked hands.

“Do you think this is easy for me?” Katsumichi asked.

“If you want something easy, then just stay with me. Don’t do this to us. Don’t die.”

Katsumichi let his head fall. It had grown heavy under the weight of Taichi’s pleas and he simply wanted to rest. Of course he knew that Taichi wouldn’t be happy to hear that Katsumichi was willing to die for the sake of his kingdom but he had hoped for some understanding, some sign that he agreed this was the right thing to do. But he was adamant in his refusal.

“Prince Taichi, I am sorry.”

“Stop it.”

Taichi’s fingers curled into the neatly combed hair behind Katsumichi’s ears. The touch was nice, Katsumichi thought as he brought his legs underneath him, kneeling properly so that his toes made the point of a ‘V’ shape and his backside rested in the hollow. He straightened his back and brought his hands to the tops of his thighs while his elbows pointed away from his body. He lifted his head and very slightly shifted his face to press his lips lightly against Taichi’s palm.

“Twelfth Child and Seventh Prince Taichi of the Fearsome Kingdom of Shiratorizawa, I, Fifth Child and Fourth Prince Katsumichi of the Virtuous Kingdom of Johzenji beg for your forgiveness and understanding. Though our union through marriage was satisfactory and beneficial I must ask you to understand that it must end.”

“Katsumichi, I mean it. Stop this.”

Katsumichi couldn’t stop because Taichi still wasn’t listening properly.

“I thank you for the love and comfort that you have offered to me and I can only hope that my attempts at reciprocating all that you have given me have reached your own heart. However in this time of crisis I must perform a duty to help the Virtuous Kingdom of Johzenji. From the bottom of my heart I hope that we can meet again and live more happily despite our suffering… and. And.” Katsumichi stopped. It was finally coming, the sadness that had frozen up inside his chest was finally thawing and dousing his lungs from within. He sniffed and rapidly blinked as he wondered why he couldn’t say anymore.

“Please stop,” Taichi whined. He shuffled closer across the pebbled ground and his breath was hot and damp against Katsumichi’s ear. “Please stop it.”

“I ask that you seek happiness here wherever you can, and that you can one day forgive me for betraying you in this way, and that if-if you forgive me you will think of our time fondly. Prince Taichi, I am deeply sorry for leaving you. And… And… I will always love you. Will you allow me that much?”

“Please.”

Taichi wept much more quietly this time. Katsumichi could only be glad that Taichi’s face was buried in his shoulder and with the shaking of his own body he couldn’t see the stray tears slip from Katsumichi’s eyes, nor could he feel Katsumichi crumbling completely.

 

Katsumichi had assumed they would sleep separately that night. Once he had grown tired of trying to dissuade Katsumichi from his plan, Taichi had stopped speaking with him altogether. They walked back from the bank of the West River together in silence. Taichi spent most of the time screwing the letter into a tight ball and then unfurling the creases to throw a disgusted look at Katsumichi before repeating the whole process.

When they arrived back at their home, Eri startled at Taichi’s appearance.

“What happened to you?” Eri asked, tossing aside the swaths of silk she was carrying as she ran up to them. “Are you alright?”

“We’re fine,” Taichi grunted. Eri quite clearly didn’t believe that and her questioning gaze shifted to Katsumichi quickly.

Katsumichi only nodded and Eri looked uncertain about what that meant. “I see. Well, _Denka_ it is only that your face is a bit… grubby?”

Taichi brought his hand to his face and only then noticed the dried snot on his cheeks. He rubbed with the edge of his sleeve as if it suddenly mattered and he hadn’t spent most of the morning and part of the afternoon in that state.

“Would you like to bathe presently, _Denka_?” Eri asked after watching Taichi unsuccessfully scrape away the dried mess of snot and tears. Taichi seemed to consider it for a moment so Eri added, “Or I could prepare one for you later if you would prefer?”

“Now will be fine. Only, we will have to bring Katsumichi with us.”

“Why would I come with you?”

At least Eri looked just as confused as Katsumichi felt. “Yes, if you don’t mind my asking, why would we bring Prince Katsumichi while you bathe?”

“Eri, out of all the people left here I trust you the most. Katsumichi must be under the supervision of you or myself at all times. Do you understand?”

Eri looked as though she completely misunderstood but she didn’t question it. She simply agreed. She must have had a lot of trust in Taichi for the fact that she followed along so easily. She was bright and efficient as she helped Taichi, even throwing a few questions to Katsumichi as though he needed to feel included.

Katsumichi didn’t need to feel like he was being included, not like this. He would have preferred a bit of distance after informing Taichi of what was to transpire. Having Eri smiling widely as she brought their meal that evening and again as she left them to retire for the night, Katsumichi realised that though he did not know her well he would be sorry to never see her again.

It was already too much that Katsumichi wouldn’t be seeing Yukie again and he wondered how she felt as she was sent away. He wondered how she would feel once she learned of Katsumichi’s passing. She would have to grieve privately, if she did it at all. Runa was his sister so she would be allowed to be more public in her loss but Katsumichi hoped that she could set that aside to find her own happiness. She should be the one to know the truth and seek to change the way thing were in Johzenji, and perhaps even in Shiratorizawa if her marriage found her wealthy with influence.

Perhaps he should have asked Taichi to tell Runa the truth once he was gone. But he didn’t particularly want to speak about it right now. Even though the fact that the letter was still with them in their shared room as they lay in their _futons_.

Katsumichi had to say it.

“Please send my letter to Johzenji.”

Katsumichi felt Taichi reach over the space between them and place his hand flat against his back. His voice was quiet in the dark. “Turn to face me. I want to feel the beating of your heart.”

Katsumichi obliged and wriggled a little bit closer. “Is this to your liking?”

“It would be to my liking if you stayed this way for a hundred years more,” Taichi said.

“That would be impossible.”

“I can still hope, can’t I? That you won’t do it? From the moment I realised the letter was serious, I have been trying to think of a way to make you take it back, but why do you insist on going through with it?”

It had been a long day already. Katsumichi was tired. He didn’t have much longer left. Despite what he had said, Taichi and Eri couldn’t keep continuous watch over him. At some point he would be alone with the poison he had procured on the way back from the visit to see the Shiratorizawa king. At some point he would die in the way Prince Jin had failed – in the way Prince Jin had accidentally made Katsumichi a victim, all because he couldn’t stand the itch of palace gossip – and save Johzenji from betrayal.

He had been alive for this long, idly spending his days and he was finally going to be of some use. He didn’t want to waste whatever time he had left arguing back and forth over something that wasn’t going to change.

“Do you remember when we first met?” Katsumichi asked. He could be a coward for now and change the subject. As long as Taichi allowed him this much.

“How could I forget? Your existence alone seemed to enrage my mother.”

Katsumichi bit his teeth into the smile that was forming from his lips. Taichi was letting him change the subject so easily. Katsumichi felt himself relax at that. He reached for the hand on his chest and twined his fingers with Taichi’s loosely.

“You didn’t seem that bothered by me though. At first it seemed that you didn’t care much for the marriage.”

“I did. A lot. I was already happy to be getting married and then when I saw you I thought that the gods must have been on my side. I never thought I would be able to meet a spouse like you if all the lives I had lived until now were full of selfless acts.”

Katsumichi could hear the smile in Taichi’s voice.

“It is easy to say that now,” He retorted, wondering why now was the time he felt shy. “You didn’t marry me because you fell in love with me when you saw me.”

“Of course I didn’t. I married you because that was what had been agreed. But I did fall in love with you when I saw you.”

“Be quiet.”

Taichi tightened the clasp of his hand around Katsumichi’s and moved even closer. Katsumichi could feel the exhale of Taichi’s breath against his cheek and tried to etch the memory into his bones.

“I mean it. And ever since then I have fallen in love with something else about you. At first it was your face, and then it was how scared I felt, and then it was the feel of your hand in mine, and then it was the sensation of your lips against mine, and then it was how difficult to speak to you. What else was there? I fell in love with things like how you seemed to regard me with a certain amount of hostility at all times, and how deeply you seemed to treasure those who had impacted upon your heart, and how you pretended to be brave day after day. And eventually I fell in love with the fact that you seemed to have fallen for me. And today,” Taichi swallowed loudly and huffed a small, damp laugh against Katsumichi’s face. It didn’t sound at all as though its source was humour and he already knew what was coming next. “Today I fell in love with what it would feel like to lose you, and I fell in love with what it would be like to have you forever.”

“Stop it,” Katsumichi whispered.

“Why? So that you can throw me away more easily?”

Taichi so easily made it seem as though the days they had spent together had all been so simple and romantic. There had been days when Katsumichi was certain he would come to detest Taichi for his cowardice, for constantly running and hiding away because he regretted whatever he had done with Katsumichi. It was usually the kisses that triggered the loneliness Katsumichi would surely find himself embroiled in. Of course, after much speculation about Taichi’s past, Katsumichi didn’t think he could be blamed for not wanting to build their intimacy.

Thinking back, it had been a difficult marriage. It was mostly Katsumichi being difficult. Of course if Taichi was shy of certain things and wasn’t sure how to navigate relationships similar to this it was because he was ignorant to it. Katsumichi was mostly contrary just to be spiteful.

He wished their time together had been as simple and easy as Taichi made it sound.

“How can any of this be easy?” Katsumichi asked in a low voice. “Right now I wish I could return to the day we met and treasure you completely. I could happily die if I had known that I had loved you with everything I had for all the time that we had.”

Taichi crept closer, his other hand pulling Katsumichi towards him while the grip on their linked hands grew stronger. “If you can’t die happily, you shouldn’t do it at all. Please, start again. In the morning we can awaken to our day one and I will love you and you will love me and you can forget about this silly plan.”

“It isn’t silly, Taichi. Did you not read in the letter what your father said? I refuse to let my family and my people fall to the mercy of such a vile man.”

“I know. But there has got to be another way that doesn’t involve… this.”

“Taichi, maybe there is another way, but I can’t think of it and there isn’t enough time to wrack our brains trying to find it,” Katsumichi sighed. His first thought hadn’t been to kill himself and hope that worked out for the best. Since his audience with Shiratorizawa’s king he had tried to think of anything he could do to change things. But there was nothing that was within Katsumichi’s capability. He didn’t want to die and he didn’t want to leave Taichi. He was only being polite when telling Taichi to find another person to fulfil his dream. Truthfully he wanted there to be nobody else who could make Taichi happy, but he was already being selfish by taking away what Taichi had claimed he desired more than anything.

Katsumichi wished he could be more selfish and not have to do anything as drastic as die to hopefully save his kingdom, but he probably didn’t deserve it.

“I promise that when we next meet, I will love you entirely.”                             

“Are you saying you don’t love me entirely now?” Taichi asked tiredly.

“No, I mean that from the moment that we meet until the moment we once again depart from the world I will love you with all the power I have within me.”

“That sounds nice. And we won’t be princes either,” Taichi added. “We will be commoners, living freely from all of this politics. We can be away from the evils of the world, living simply and by meeting you I can find my purpose in life.”

“That is too much. You can have other dreams too. If you weren’t a prince, what would you want most in the world? If we pray hard enough the gods might allow it for the next time we meet.”

“I would just want to be a normal person. I don’t want people to needlessly focus on me too much. I would like to have some friends that I can speak to often. And I would probably want to be a better version of myself. I would want to be smarter so that I can solve any problem that you have and I want to be better at physical pursuits in order to impress you.” Taichi still sounded tired but there was a smile in his voice and that was enough for Katsumichi even if they were pointlessly dreaming.

“You already impress me,” Katsumichi said, because he wanted to continue to hear the happiness he will soon lose.

“I want to impress you more than anybody else. Even more than, say, Crown Prince Wakatoshi. Even if he is ‘big’, I love you.”

“What are you talking about? Crown Prince Wakatoshi doesn’t impress me. He is quite boorish. Also, what do you mean by ‘big’? You’re big too, aren’t you?”

Taichi sighed and hesitated. Maybe the darkness was opening up his mind a little bit more and the little things he had been keeping inside were starting to seep out. Or he thought that now was as good a time as any for a confession. He wouldn’t be able to say it in the future. He raised a hand to Katsumichi’s face.

“There was something you said a while ago. After first meeting Crown Prince Wakatoshi you described him as being big, and I didn’t quite understand why you would because I am around the same height as him. I think I was on edge because we had yet to consummate the marriage and, though I was completely fooled into thinking you didn’t even know what those sorts of things were, I couldn’t stop thinking about how we should do it or whether we should bother at all. I was trying so hard to be reliable and supportive about it and then you said a thing like that, about Crown Prince Wakatoshi being ‘big’ and I immediately wondered whether I was already losing you. I wondered whether that was the sort of thing that you wanted. Whether that was the sort of thing that impressed you.”

By the end, Taichi’s voice was quiet and was further muffled into the skin of Katsumichi’s neck. He too would have been embarrassed by having to admit to thinking something as ridiculous as that. Katsumichi stroked at Taichi’s exposed neck, wondering why it was only recently that he was getting to see these positively adorable sides to his spouse.

He sighed, “He is big. And I was still confused and scared and I accidentally happened upon this intimidating… creature!”

Taichi snorted right into Katsumichi’s neck. It tickled and he was glad of getting to smile like this.

“Creature?”

“Is he a human? I was initially wary of you because you weren’t very expressive, unless you were expressing disappointment, but I seriously doubt that man has experienced an actual emotion in his life.”

“You’re probably right,” Taichi agreed. He leaned up to press a light kiss to Katsumichi’s jaw and he dropped back down to the _futon_ with a sigh. Katsumichi kept his hand at the nape of Taichi’s neck, stroking at the downy hairs and feeling Taichi’s body slip closer to sleep.

“So, you want to be able to impress me when we next meet,” Katsumichi began. His voice was quiet but it made Taichi stiffen slightly. “What do you want me to do for you?”

Taichi hummed quietly. His breathing evened until Katsumichi was certain he was asleep. He was close to drifting quietly off himself when he heard a slurred, “Stay.”

It was the smallest of requests and Katsumichi regretted that he wouldn’t be able to do that much right now. It must have been a pain being married to him, but he hadn’t meant to be so hurtful. He was not able to be a good spouse at this time, but if they were able to meet again in a different lifetime, Katsumichi couldn’t image that he would repeat his mistakes.

“Of course I will,” Katsumichi murmured, not wanting to disturb the easy, heavy breaths that had followed Taichi’s plea. “I promise that staying with you will be my top priority the next time we meet.”


	15. Second Chance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prince Taichi has an idea to stop Prince Katsumichi's extremes.

Katsumichi remembered saying he had wanted to return to the early days of the marriage. It seemed his wish had come true because Taichi was nowhere to be seen the next morning. Light was filtering in through the open door and the _sudare_ flapped in the tendrils of breeze. Outside it was drizzling and the precipitation had cooled the air enough for Katsumichi to be sufficiently cooled. He gathered the blankets tightly around his shoulders and then realised the mistake of his hope.

In the early days of the marriage, Taichi hadn’t slept beside him so there was no need for two _futons_ to be laid out on the floor. What’s more, it was Taichi’s room that Katsumichi awoke in. Of course the earth had not reversed its journey just to give Katsumichi more time.

The odd feeling he had upon waking, that he had returned to the early days of the marriage, before he had learnt of the impending war, only grew stronger as the day went on. Katsumichi didn’t see Taichi until well into the evening and he didn’t see much of Eri either. Despite the rain he had spent most of the day sitting at the West River and reading over some documents he had taken from Taichi’s room in the morning. He was almost always sitting at the bank and on rainy days, if the rain wasn’t pelting at the earth with great force, Katsumichi would sit under the cover of an aged tree.

If anybody were looking for him, he would easily be found.

Aside from a short walk into the village where he found somebody willing to take his letter to Johzenji in exchange for a bag of gold he had ‘borrowed’ from Taichi’s study, Katsumichi hadn’t moved much all day. There were no excuses for Taichi and Eri not to find him, and watch over him as had been threatened the day before. Though in their absence there were no excuses as to why Katsumichi hadn’t swallowed every last drop of the poison.

He already knew that he didn’t want to die and it was just weakness on his part that let his selfishness win out.

The rain grew heavier as the sky grew darker and Katsumichi had to return to the house. Just one more night couldn’t hurt. He would get the chance tomorrow to eat the poison. He would go ahead with his plan and stop being such a coward.

He heard a skittering of pebbles that didn’t match the crunches of his own movements as he stiffly stood from where he had been curled up.

“You’re still alive,” Taichi gasped. He sprinted across the distance between them, the collision of their bodies winding them both from the way Taichi was wheezing. His arms were tight around Katsumichi before he started patting everywhere he could reach as though he was somehow being fooled by Katsumichi’s presence. He held Katsumichi close once more, tight enough for Katsumichi to struggle to inflate his lungs, and whispered. “You’re still alive.”

“I am. Were you testing me?”

“No! I went to the main palace,” Taichi said. Katsumichi craned his neck to see all that he could while still in the restrictive embrace. Taichi was wearing dark, plain clothes, that were spattered with mud. There was also a horse tossing its mane not too far away as though irritated that it would be made to stand out in the rain.

“Why did you go?”

Taichi looked hesitant for a moment and seemed to accept his blush as it came to him. “To save you.” He really did appear solidly reliable for a moment before he exhaled sharply. “I thought I was too late. I know that Eri doesn’t understand because she was never told but she told me that she hadn’t been able to find you since this morning. And nobody else had seen you and I was so sure that I was too late. I didn’t want to come here just in case this was the place you… Katsumichi, you’re alive.”

The relief that was seeping out of Taichi was a terrible thing to feel. He couldn’t form a sentence that Katsumichi could fully comprehend, but he was squeezing Katsumichi so tightly and he was giddy to the point of weeping between stilted giggles.

Katsumichi should have been glad that he was able to see Taichi like this, reverent in the breaths that were hitting his cheek and the pulse he could feel as he pressed his lips to Katsumichi’s neck. Taichi’s face was already wet, Katsumichi belatedly realised. He hoped it was more to do with the rain than the alternative possibility that Taichi had been crying once more. What difference would it make if he was crying again anyway? Katsumichi wasn’t sure but he wished they hadn’t met again in this way. He wished Taichi had sent the letter along in the first place and maybe grieved quietly after the fact if he really loved Katsumichi so much.

Nobody had ever reacted so joyfully to Katsumichi gaping in confusion and pressing his lips between his teeth to keep his own lament at bay.

“I’m so sorry, Taichi.”

“No. No, don’t be sorry because it is fine.” Just when Katsumichi was trying to downplay his surprise at Taichi’s sudden acceptance of his death, Taichi breathed, “You won’t die.”

“What do you mean?”

“I went to the main palace,” Taichi said. “I spoke to Crown Prince Wakatoshi and I have convinced him to help us. You don’t have to leave me.”

Katsumichi still did not understand. No matter how popular Crown Prince Wakatoshi was amongst the people, he was only a prince. There was nothing that he could do to challenge the whims of a king.

“Taichi, can you explain it in a way that would make sense to me?”

Taichi nodded quickly, smiling even. “I am going to kill the king.”

 

Despite his near frivolous smiles the day before, when Taichi was sitting beside Katsumichi in the carriage to the main palace of Shiratorizawa, his face was grim. Katsumichi was glad. To kill a king was no trifling matter and Katsumichi could hardly bring himself to believe that the words had been genuine.

Katsumichi’s thumb stroked over the glass vial he had procured from his last visit to the palace. Since his missed opportunity the day before – which was silly of him really because the letter was sent and he had the means to enact his plan but some sudden bout of selfish fear had him opting to read marriage notices and congratulatory messages that his spouse had long-since ignored – he had kept the vial in his hand. It hadn’t been difficult to find out about _pieris japonica_ and how the effects matched the symptoms he had shown.

It was curious that Prince Jin had been so willing to endure the crunching stabs in his stomach and the convulsions that would leave him panting and too weak to mop at the sweat that was seeping from his pores. But there may have been a reason Prince Jin had opted for the blinding headaches that swelled with the roiling of his stomach as it redundantly begged him to accept the burn of bile and nothing much else as he heaved in his sickness.

To die in such a way wouldn’t be a comfort to anybody. Unless Prince Jin had been hoping for punishment.

If Prince Jin were as cowardly a man as he was purported to be, he surely would have wanted a swifter death by the sword or any other weapon that could have pierced his heart and ceased its beating. Katsumichi knew that he would not choose this poison if there was another way.

Volunteering to die in order to help his kingdom, wasn’t Prince Jin a braver man than Katsumichi could ever hope to be?

“At least put that away,” Taichi muttered. Katsumichi looked up at the scowl that Taichi was trying to turn away from him. “If you won’t get rid of the poison, please put it somewhere so that I don’t have to think about it.”

“Will me hiding this away remove all traces of it from your mind?” Katsumichi asked, twisting the vial in his fingers.

“Of course it won’t. But looking at it doesn’t make me feel any better.” Taichi finally looked over at Katsumichi and closed his hand around Katsumichi’s stilling his movements. “If you won’t get rid of it entirely you could at least pretend to have rid yourself of it.”

Katsumichi sighed. He slipped the vial onto his lap and twined his fingers with Taichi’s.

“Is this better?” He asked. Taichi shook his head. Katsumichi leaned into Taichi’s shoulder and wondered how he ended up with this sort of poor luck. “At least the poison is only for me. I wouldn’t say anything as ridiculous as plotting regicide.”

“Katsumichi, you are all that I need in this world. Let me do this one thing to protect all that I treasure.”

“Why are you saying such embarrassing things instead of answering to your crime?”

“Crime?” Taichi asked.

“Just being suspected of plotting treason is enough to have you killed. If you tell the wrong person about your stupid idea your father could put you to death without a trial,” Katsumichi said. Taichi seemed to be ignoring the frown being directed at him so Katsumichi slumped back in his seat and sighed heavily. “I might as well eat the poison now. Once you have been put to death there will no doubt be questions over my involvement. Perhaps it was me who put you up to it and turned you into a monster who would betray not only his kingdom but his own family so heinously. I too will have to be done away with, so I suppose my plan to break off diplomatic ties with Shiratorizawa will succeed even though Johzenji will no doubt be denounced by all of the other kingdoms and noble families. It isn’t an elegant plan but I suppose it serves its purpose well enough.”

“Be quiet you,” Taichi chided grumpily. “Crown Prince Wakatoshi won’t go back on this. He is going to help me kill the King.”

Katsumichi didn’t believe it at all but he said nothing more on the matter. He didn’t have any reason to trust Crown Prince Wakatoshi, though he had been a help in the past. Katsumichi did appreciate that he had gone against the King and refuse to marry Runa, but it had seemed he was never too set in the marriage in the first place.

 

 

It had started to drizzle by the time they arrived at the main palace. The morning had been overcast but Katsumichi didn’t think that the sky would start to break just yet. Though he was glad of it when he noticed Crown Prince Wakatoshi waiting to receive them at the edge of the main courtyard. There weren’t many other people about so perhaps they had all engaged in tasks which did not require them to move about outside.

Eri had come in a separate carriage and was quickly met by servants who all kept their faces down against the rain as they set about taking away the horses and carriages and moving the luggage to the guest quarters of the palace. 

Crown Prince Wakatoshi was still as he stood with his back straight and the rain wisping about in front of him. His brow was furrowed when they arrived in front of him and Katsumichi noted that the Crown Prince was not so gracious of a host as to swiftly give a reception in the safety of indoors.

“Prince Taichi. Prince Katsumichi. Your journey did not bring any discomfort, did it?”

Taichi responded to the Crown Prince’s stiff greeting with a sneer. “It did not, but knowing what to expect at the end of the journey certainly did.”

Crown Prince Wakatoshi looked thoughtful for a moment. “I suppose you are right, though we shouldn’t speak of that out here. Let us discuss this inside.”

Taichi rolled his eyes for Katsumichi’s benefit but aside from that they made no comments about the Crown Prince. Either he was not listening or he had completely missed the barbs that were aimed at him. The pair of them followed in silence as Crown Prince Wakatoshi took them to his room.

He lived much closer to the main hall than Prince Reon did. The walk had them skirting past the wide stone steps that lead up to the towering hall with its jutting roof cutting a striking silhouette against the vaguely overcast sky. The architecture of the palace channelled the negligible breeze which carried the rain into a howling wind that had Katsumichi and Taichi shielding their ears against the nightmarish sound. Crown Prince Wakatoshi looked unperturbed. They could only see his back as they trailed behind him but Crown Prince Wakatoshi was standing straight and walking with purpose despite the wind that caught his _kariginu_ with intent to drag him backwards.

They arrived quickly, thankfully. Katsumichi wasn’t looking forward to freezing down to his bones. He doubted much hospitality would be offered when the door was finally opened.

“Prince Satori,” Crown Prince Wakatoshi said. He didn’t sound surprised as such, but his tone wasn’t particularly welcoming. But he probably was surprised because he stopped abruptly in the doorway and Katsumichi walked right into his back.

Katsumichi rubbed at his nose and ignored Taichi’s smirk as though almost ruining his face was something to laugh about. There was another reason that he shouldn’t have been so relaxed, smiling slyly as though he would have plenty of time after this leisurely meeting to rib Katsumichi for it.

Prince Satori was sitting cross-legged in the middle of the room, reclining against the low round table that had been set up with cups and a teapot and a lamp that cast the slyness of Prince Satori’s profile flickering, sinister.

“Wakatoshi, you’re back!”

Crown Prince Wakatoshi didn’t answer for a moment, just stared back at Prince Satori lounging in a room that should have been empty. He finally said, “I am back. But what are you doing here, Prince Satori?”

“I was waiting for you,” Prince Satori said nonchalantly. “And I see that you brought Taichi with you. Why is that?”

Taichi pulled Katsumichi closer by his elbow and reached for his hand. The contact lasted no longer than a moment – as long as it took for Taichi’s fingertips to graze the glass bottle enveloped in Katsumichi’s hand. Katsumichi glanced down at the inoffensively clear liquid and wondered why it was such an obstacle for Taichi. This plan, as reckless and easy to get wrong as it was, was fine but Katsumichi liked the reassuring cool of the glass between his fingers and against his palm.

Katsumichi’s heart hadn’t been shaking for a while. He was at peace with what he had decided. Getting to live was a nice thing to think about, something that could keep his spirits high as he savoured every moment he had left by Taichi’s side, but he knew it wasn’t the best way to secure the safety of his kingdom. But Prince Satori was staring at him curiously.

Prince Satori hadn’t even mentioned Katsumichi in his question but the focus in his eyes was as strong as though he had asked Katsumichi the question. Before Crown Prince Wakatoshi could say anything, Prince Satori said, “Are you sick again? You had best come inside quickly.”

“You are quite right,” Crown Prince Wakatoshi agreed. He sat facing Prince Satori and waited for Katsumichi and Taichi to sit around the table with them. “I wanted to ask Prince Taichi for some advice.”

Prince Satori’s eyes bulged before his sides split with a guffaw. Crown Prince Wakatoshi’s face didn’t move whereas Taichi’s brow furrowed at the display of mirth. Taichi may have been younger but there were probably a great many subjects that he could advise the Crown Prince on. Taichi could teach the Crown Prince how to read the mood or how to respond with slightly more consideration than he usually might have. Prince Satori could have used some of that advice too.

When Prince Satori stopped laughing, possibly at the realisation that he was the only one laughing, he said, “So, what advice is it that you are seeking from Taichi?”

Taichi bristled.

“I wish to marry,” Crown Prince Wakatoshi said simply. Katsumichi thought that his own spluttering made the lie seem obvious so he pretended he had a tickle in his throat. Though Prince Satori did not seem to care much for Katsumichi’s embellishments. Prince Satori leaned across the table and squinted at Crown Prince Wakatoshi.

“And you thought Taichi was the best person to go to for advice on marrying?”

“Naturally.”

“What is natural about that? We have another brother who thinks of you more dearly than this one and he has been married for longer than him too.”

Katsumichi supposed the brother being referenced was Prince Reon. Crown Prince Wakatoshi’s lie did sound weak when he remembered Prince Reon. Katsumichi can’t imagine a day would have passed where Prince Reon hid away from Lady Mai and suggested they dissolve the union whenever they met.

It seemed so simple. If Katsumichi got to live this life again he would write to Prince Reon on advice on adjusting to married life. He would write to Lady Mai to ask how to adjust to life in Shiratorizawa and not feel like every misstep would cost him his life. He would write to his own sister, Hana whose move to Fukurodani seemed to have happened uncountable days before now, to ask how best he should endeavour to live and what he could do to keep his kingdom in good stead.

Not even this life. If Katsumichi lived another life to find his way and somehow found Taichi he wouldn’t want to ruin it. He would ask for help and advice from anybody he could find. Instead of allowing his uncertainly to mire the hopes he had for the future he would look for advice and avoid the mistakes he had made this time.

“A man,” Crown Prince Wakatoshi said so sharply that Katsumichi couldn’t even hope to disguise his flinch as anything else. Taichi patted his knee as though he needed to reassure him, though Katsumichi was quite alright with the situation. The crack of the Crown Prince’s voice was startling but it was no danger. He was already frowning at Taichi to convey this when Crown Prince Wakatoshi added, “I wish to marry a man. So Prince Taichi would be the best source of advice if I asked among our family.”

Prince Satori looked thoughtful, his sharp eyes darting from Crown Prince Wakatoshi, to Taichi, to Katsumichi. His lips unfurled into yet another sly smile.

“Really? Who is it you want to marry?”

“The heir to Aoba. The child of that family most renowned for his military expertise has already been married to Karasuno but if the heir accepts my offer we can all but ensure a strong allegiance between our families,” Crown Prince Wakatoshi said. He said it so easily that Katsumichi almost found himself believing it.

“Have you formally made an offer to him?” Prince Satori asked in a saccharine voice. It was as though all he wished in the world was to hear about his brother’s attempts at romancing a fallen prince. He rested his chin in his hands and stared expectantly at the Crown Prince.

“Not as yet. I have mentioned it many times in my correspondence. His replies are usually of the romantic sort where he tells me he would be honoured to join with me while all the people of the world can look upon our match.”

Prince Satori’s grin faltered a little. “Wakatoshi, I’ve read your letters. I think you are completely misunderstanding the phrase ‘not if you were the last man on earth’.”

Katsumichi wasn’t sure what he was meant to be more surprised about. Crown Prince Wakatoshi actually sending letters to proposition the heir to Aoba, the fact that Prince Satori would brazenly admit to reading private correspondence, or the density of the brain in the head of the man who was supposed to help them. Taichi had settled for holding his head in his hands. Katsumichi knew he had the best plan after all.

“That is but a friendly jest. It is the sort of wit I would desire from a spouse,” Crown Prince Wakatoshi said airily. He turned to Taichi, not seeming to notice the stricken expression on his brother’s face. “Is that not the sort of thing I should be looking for in a match?”

Taichi very carefully looked away from Katsumichi. He started pouring tea into the cups, three of them, and as there was a deficit of cups he slid his own cup towards Prince Satori. A drop of tea had pearled on the surface of the table and Taichi dabbed at the spot with his finger. “As your reasons for marriage seem to be political, I believe you should focus on that for now. It is fine to be jovial at this point but you should consider matching the things that make you laugh with the things that make him laugh. If he doesn’t find something funny, neither should you.”

Katsumichi boggled at the worst piece of advice he had ever heard. He wondered whether this was the only thing he could come up with at short notice, but Katsumichi did not particularly want to ask. He could not imagine his own dismay if he asked about it and found that this was something that Taichi truly believed. The real advice was to ignore the instances of idiocy shown from his spouse so he could live peacefully and not drive himself mad wondering how somebody could say something so ridiculous.

“Fine,” Prince Satori said, saving Katsumichi from having to comment on the terrible thing Taichi had said. “For argument’s sake, you and the Aoba heir are flirting enough for you to want to marry him. Do you think our father would let his successor enter a marriage that wouldn’t continue the royal bloodline?”

“Exactly. That is why I plan to kill the king.”

Prince Satori couldn’t even be trusted to react the way one would when confronted with regicide. He laughed, throwing back his head in a howl and smacking at the table top with his fist. There must have something wrong with all the people of Shiratorizawa if three people already had failed to react with shock and disgust at the thought of killing their king.

“You’re going to kill our father over a boy?” Prince Satori asked when he finally stopped laughing. Crown Prince Wakatoshi’s eyes shifted to Katsumichi for a moment before he answered.

“He’s more of a man, really.”

“I can always count on you to be a pedant at times like this,” Prince Satori sighed. He glanced at Katsumichi and Taichi with disinterest. “Wakatoshi, why did you include these two before me?”

“We aren’t very close, so our plan would not be suspected right away,” Crown Prince Wakatoshi said without inflection. “And they owe me a favour.”

Prince Satori looked deeply interested – just for a moment. Perhaps he was not taken in by the untruths, or perhaps he didn’t care. He didn’t seem the type to let things go, especially not if he had been reading correspondence between his brother and a potential match. Prince Satori’s eyes slid away from Katsumichi and Taichi and he fixed his gaze on Crown Prince Wakatoshi.

“So, how do you plan on doing it?” Prince Satori asked lightly.

Before anybody else could part their lips, Taichi said, “I will just need to ensure I can be alone with the King. I won’t reveal the exact method at this point.”

“I can’t allow that,” Crown Prince Wakatoshi said. The line of Taichi’s shoulders straightened and his jaw clenched as he stared back at the Crown Prince.

“Why might that be, _Koutaishi_?”

“With just yourself and the King in the room, you could fabricate some deathbed confession about how he always wanted you to take the throne,” Was the startlingly reasonable reply. It would be better for Katsumichi if Taichi had as little to do with this stupid plan as possible. It was unlikely that he would remove himself from the situation but as long as there was the possibility of sharing the blame, Katsumichi was all for it.

“I have no interest in the throne, everybody already knows that.”

“Wakatoshi’s right,” Prince Satori said contemplatively. “You could be lying to us and it would be another story like the Queen of Niiyama.”

The Queen of Niiyama was something of a fairy tale in the region. It had originated as gossip and diffused itself into cautionary tales of deceit and betrayal that royal infants need be capable of understanding. A princess of low birth was uninterested in the lofty ideals of the throne but became a filial icon in her kingdom. The princess had nursed both of her parents through long illnesses and worked tirelessly as though she was just an overly-devoted servant. Until the day the reigning monarch died and she announced to all the world that the dying decree had been for her to rule – to care for the kingdom as well as she had cared for her parents.

The Queen who resulted from the story was just as elderly as the remaining monarchs who had fought by her side and against her in the times of war. It was unlikely that the truth to the story had passed her lips in all the years she had lived. But the story was well known and Katsumichi could see why someone who desired the throne would not trust the word of someone claiming disinterest. In the version of the story Katsumichi had heard when he passed into adulthood the newly coronated queen had put her traitorous siblings to death for all sorts of treacherous acts.  

He doubted very much that Taichi would put his siblings to death just in case they attempted to snatch the throne from him, but he had also doubted Taichi would come up with an idea as ridiculous as killing a king. Katsumichi didn’t quite know what to believe and he only felt a little bit guilty for avoiding Taicih’s gaze as he silently asked for support.

“Fine,” Taichi said. “The easiest way would be poison. The King’s health is not in the best condition so his body won’t be able to do much to protect him from it.”

Prince Satori made a disappointed sound. “That’s a bit weak, isn’t it? And it is not very original considering the fact that so many people have already been poisoned around here.”

“Yet somehow you’ve escaped from that,” Taichi snapped.

“Why don’t we use a sword,” Crown Prince Wakatoshi said as though he had formulated the greatest idea of the era. Even Prince Satori shook his head.

“Taichi’s right, we should go with poison. A sword is far too clumsy and anyone who finds out that you murdered your own father with a sword will think badly of you.”

“It would be original, wouldn’t it?” Crown Prince Wakatoshi said with a frown.

“But that is too original,” Prince Satori said kindly. “Besides, I don’t think I would be able to put the image out of my mind if I saw you plunge a sword into his chest.”

“Why will you be there too?”

“Why don’t you want me to be there, Taichi?” Prince Satori asked injuredly. “We’re brothers, aren’t we? We should stick together. And if, by chance, you decided to turn your methods on our dearest Wakatoshi after doing away with the King, I can put a stop to it.”

That was unexpected. It was too much. There was no way that Taichi would go that far. But Taichi didn’t even try to defend himself – though it was likely a losing battle. He simply looked away from Prince Satori and turned his gaze to Katsumichi and gave him a significant look.

“You’ll have to excuse Prince Katsumichi and I for a moment,” Taichi said before climbing to his feet. Though he was confused, Katsumichi followed even upon realising he really intended for them to go back outside. Taichi squinted against the rain that was floating around in his face, the droplets too small and directionless to plummet to the earth and soak the two men properly.

“What is it, Taichi?”

“You can’t be in there. I won’t have you there as a part of the discussions,” Taichi said quietly.

“Why? What difference does my presence make? Doesn’t it seem odd that I was sitting with you all to hear about what you intended and now I am conveniently absent. I could be telling people about the plan if I’m not there.”

Trust did not seem to be abundant in Shiratorizawa, not even at a time like this when three princes were so emotionless when discussing the murder of their own father. All of them remained cool and the only issue was whether the victims would increase. If they could so easily distrust one of their own there was no reason for them to think positively of Katsumichi. It could be a trap and he could be used to implicate Taichi in worse should Prince Satori and Crown Prince Wakatoshi have been disingenuous.

“Nobody is going to touch you,” Taichi said.

“What about you?”

“What about me?” Taichi said. He smiled briefly despite the unseasonable cold and the wind that whipped the rain into their faces. “I love you. I won’t lose you.”

“I’m just uselessly creating problems at this point, Taichi. I know you are trying to help but there is too much risk involved.”

Taichi didn’t say anything to allay Katsumichi’s concerns. Only, “I know.”

Knowing wasn’t enough. Katsumichi couldn’t stand by and watch Johzenji be destroyed at the whim of one man, but he could hardly do nothing while Taichi risked his own life for his sake. But that was exactly what he was being asked to do.

He squeezed Taichi’s hand gently and didn’t argue when he was instructed to wait in the bath houses he had been to on his first night in Shiratorizawa.


	16. King Wakatoshi, The Efficacious One, Tenth Ruler of the Fearsome Kingdom of Shiratorizawa

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The plot to depose the King is executed.

Katsumichi could hardly feel offended that he had been left out of the plans. Beyond the unspecific goal of killing the King, he had no idea what Taichi and his brothers were thinking. He had woken alone in the guest room of Crown Prince Wakatoshi’s home. He waited for a while, blinking the soft morning light from his eyes as it filtered into the room through the window. As the breeze grew stronger and rattled the bamboo on the _sudare_ that kept the small insects at bay, Katsumichi became more aware of the fact that Taichi’s absence was not a recent thing.

He sat up as quickly as his body would allow him, irritated at the sluggishness his slumber had left in the stiffness of his muscles. He felt around the futon and found nothing. His hands became more clumsy as his actions entered the frantic. But there was nothing aside from the fragile quills of feathers that stuffed his futon.

The poison was gone.

No matter how many times Katsumichi swept his hands across the futon and beneath folds of fabric there was no tiny glass tube. Katsumichi could vividly conjure the image of the liquid that was not quite clear as it left a thick residue on the inside of the vial as he tipped the liquid inside. But no matter how much detail he could use to remember it, the object itself failed to materialise before him.

Eri knocked lightly before she entered with a tight smile.

“Good morning, Prince Katsumichi,” She said as she approached with his breakfast on a tray. She placed it next to him and blinked expectantly when he only stared back at her. “Is anything the matter, Prince Katsumichi?”

Katsumichi did not want to give too much away. If anything happened and Eri was questioned, Katsumichi did not want her to be implicated in any way. He wished she too could have accompanied Runa to Johzenji but that would have been too much. It would have been suspicious that Katsumichi and Taichi were getting by on the bare bones of their usual staff and there would have been no question about Katsumichi’s death.

Instead of asking what he really wanted to know, he tried to smile. “Good morning, Eri. Do you know where Taichi is?”

“He said he had to meet with some of his brothers,” Eri said. “There are no plans in place for you to do anything in particular. What would you like to do today, Prince Katsumichi?”

Katsumichi only had vague plans of what he had intended to do today, though he could not tell Eri. He knew it was dishonest to Taichi to have pretended to go along with the plan, to let Taichi live in his dream world of killing the king as though things could be that simple. But it seemed that Taichi was set on making his stupid plan reality.

“We could spend the day together,” Katsumichi suggested weakly. Eri looked taken aback but smiled in response.

She nodded as she bowed her head awkwardly. “Yes, _Denka_ , that would be nice. What could we do together?”

They could play _igo_ together, but Katsumichi wasn’t confident in his ability to teach Eri if she didn’t know how to play. They could just stay inside and Katsumichi could dismantle as much of the room as possible to find the poison. They could find any other way to kill Katsumichi so Taichi didn’t have to go through with a plan as stupid as killing a king. 

“Is there anywhere nice to spend time around the palace?” Katsumichi asked.

Eri hesitated for a moment before her face split into a smile. “ _Denka_ , we have some lovely views in Shiratorizawa. I can show you places more beautiful than you would find at West River.”

Katsumichi was trying hard today. He had no poison and he didn’t think he had much chance of dropping dead by chance in a way that appeared to be an assassination. So he ate his breakfast until he felt his stomach would burst, because he didn’t want to waste the food, and he dressed slowly in the casual _kariginu_ that had been supplied for him. The sky was bright and the weather was still warm despite the chilling rain from the day before. It was still summer so if Katsumichi tried to empty his mind enough he could feel slightly more positive than he had been for the past few days.   

And for a little while everything was alright.

“What do you think?” Eri asked as they sat in one of the gardens. It was not an overcast day as Katsumichi had expected, and instead the large lake glittered in the distance with the ministrations of the breeze. All around, flowering shrubs encroached and Katsumichi was mostly marvelling at how impossible he would be to spot by passers-by. If he and Eri kept quiet there was no way that they would be found. Katsumichi would have quite liked a place like this at West River.

“It is beautiful.”

Eri nodded and smiled into the distance. “Are there places like this in Johzenji? I didn’t notice anything of the sort whilst I was there.”

“Johzenji tends towards spaces where people can easily be gathered. Or at least it used to. Perhaps nowadays they might plant bushes and flowers until the grounds are stuffed with brightness,” Katsumichi said dully. Eri’s expression didn’t dim despite the veneer of concern over her face.  

“Do you not like flowers?” She asked. Katsumichi frowned. He did not think that was how his words would sound. He had only meant to lightly comment on the state of his old kingdom.

“They’re… nice to look at, I suppose.”

Eri nodded. “It would be nice if we could have more of them around West River. If only Prince Taichi didn’t have such a poor reaction to them,” She said wistfully. She smiled again, stiff and awkward. She had been right about the views around Shiratorizawa but Katsumichi wondered whether the sightseeing was a tactical decision.  

It would have made sense, he supposed, if Eri did eventually find out some of the secrets Katsumichi had been holding close. Taichi had though he would be fine telling Eri to keep an eye on Katsumichi without actually telling her what to be on the look-out for so he shouldn’t have been too surprised if Katsumichi had carried out his plan. But Taichi must have told her for her to be sticking this closely.

In the past, whenever Katsumichi and Eri had spoken it was always a bit stilted and awkward. It was not so much the case whenever Kaori or Yukie were around but the two of them alone didn’t usually have the relaxed nature that would have made for an easy life. Katsumichi would never have forced himself into a situation he could easily avoid should he have been in Eri’s position, but she always did seem more duty-bound than the others at West River. So she must have been told. If anything went wrong with Taichi’s plan, she would know the details and could be punished for being a part of the crime.

It wasn’t fair to her.

Katsumichi cleared his throat, wondering why he could feel the cloistering press of awkwardness even out here in the labyrinthine blooms of the wide garden.

“Eri, if you could ask for anything to make your life easier, what would you ask for?”

For the first time that day, Eri’s smile faltered. “ _Denka_?”

“It doesn’t even need to be something that you think that I could do,” Katsumichi pressed. “If you worked at West River for the rest of your life, what is one thing that would make it acceptable for you? What would make you enjoy being there?”

Eri looked away. Her ears were tipped with evening blush despite the early hour. She picked at the fraying hem of her _kariginu_ and Katsumichi swallowed around the dryness of his throat. Surely a very basic thing to make Eri feel a bit more valued would be to ensure her clothes weren’t falling apart. It must have been something she suffered through considering she had hardly been raised on the streets.

“Prince Katsumichi, why did you and Prince Taichi bring me here with you?”

Ah, that too. Not bringing her to a place where one wrong move would see her paying with her life ought to have shown how valued she was.

“Is your question the answer to my question?” Katsumichi asked hesitantly.

Eri shrugged and smoothed out the ripples of her _hakama_. “I had never disliked working at West River. It was a little bit different to working here at the main palace but the basics were the same. It seemed a bit more casual too because of the nature of you two princes, but I began to wish that I was not employed there. I began to wish that I worked somewhere else where my efforts wouldn’t have put me in a position like this. If I worked for any of the other princes, or if my family were more closely related to any of the other families around Shiratorizawa, I could be somewhere else where I wouldn’t be seen differently because I kept the appropriate distance, or because I didn’t aim for something out of my reach. And then I found myself thinking terrible things about the people all around me because I was angry and scared.”

Already her eyes had glossed and her nose was as red as her ears. “Part of me is glad that you didn’t separate Yukie and Kaori because recently things have been going well for them and what they have is something that I could never even hope to replace. But. _Denka_ , I know what the pair of you are doing here. I don’t want to die.”

Of course she didn’t want to die. Katsumichi didn’t want to die either. But he couldn’t let her sit in such a beautiful garden, surrounded by lush greenery, while stifling sobs that were puffing through her clenched teeth.

“I don’t want you to die either,” Katsumichi said lamely. Eri spluttered loudly and pushed her face against her hands. Katsumichi wasn’t sure what Eri would accept as comfort so he settled for patting her shoulder lightly until she leaned more heavily into his touch. She came easily into his arms as he wound them around her. “You won’t die, Eri. Taichi is going to make sure that doesn’t happen.”

“That isn’t true. He doesn’t care about me.”

“He does. He trusts you more than anybody,” Katsumichi said. It was only after he had said it that he really thought about what Taichi’s trust amounted to. He was holding her accountable for things that she didn’t even fully comprehend. If Katsumichi had secretly enacted his plan, Taichi would have blamed her. But there was nothing that she could have done.

“You were going to kill yourself, _Denka_ ,” Eri whined, “And it would have been all my fault.”

Katsumichi had been hoping all along that Eri was ignorant to the affairs of the West River estate. As far as he knew she only knew what was necessary to be an indispensable servant. He wasn’t sure how she had found out about Katsumichi’s plan but even here he probably was not allowed to be surprised. Any number of people could have found out by sharing the information from the letter he had written or general gossip. Katsumichi knew well that servants talked – Yukie had told him enough times – so there was no way of knowing how many people knew what Katsumichi had intended to do. But he had to swallow back the bilious fear.

“It would not have been your fault.”

Eri shook her head quickly, probably smearing snot and tears onto Katsumichi’s chest, but he hardly had the right to mind. Eri was right. It would not have been her fault, had Katsumichi died, but she would have borne the responsibility. There were all sorts of punishments that were meted out to servants in a palace and Katsumichi couldn’t begin to reassure Eri of protection against a single one of them.

“None of that matters now,” Katsumichi said. He didn’t sound like he believed the words very much even though he did. “Taichi is doing his best to fix it for us, so please don’t leave us, Eri. We need you too.”

Eri made no indication that she was even paying attention to Katsumichi but he hoped that she had heard, even if the thought only served to make him feel better about himself. He had never considered that Eri wouldn’t be perfectly happy with how things were. There was a lot resting on her shoulders that she had never asked for. Like royal children born for leverage and the pretence of power, Eri had never asked to be relied upon for such delicate points of tension.  

Eri had never asked for anything and even now, Katsumichi found he had nothing to offer her. He hoped the fact that he had listened at all was of some comfort to her. He really did not know what to say. Maybe he was too selfish, still concentrating on himself and what any failure to kill the King would mean for him and Taichi rather than thinking more widely about what it would mean for all of the people connected even loosely to the pair of them.

Johzenji would be denounced, Lady Yue would be lucky to be exiled, Eri would be lucky to have a swift death. It was just as unfair for them as it was for Katsumichi and Taichi and he didn’t quite know how to start actively thinking about that. He was still too ravelled in thoughts of grandeur, of the decadence of royalty that had soured rapidly over the recent months, as he tried to claw back whatever he could in the name of justice. Nothing that Katsumichi had done was very just. It was all stupid and immature. He knew that any failure in his initial plan would have resulted in execution and the denouncement of Johzenji. He had just hoped his desperation would have outweighed his fear of dying.

His own death had haunted him since he first heard the King of Shiratorizawa mention invading Johzenji and killing his family. He had no idea how long Eri had been chewing at the edge of her nails to calm the stabbing of similar thoughts.

Eri stiffened when Katsumichi’s hand moved from her shoulder to her hand.

“I think Yukie told me that you grew up on a farm,” Katsumichi said conversationally. His voice sounded abrasive even to his own ears but he had nothing else. Eri shook her head and lifted her face just enough to peer in his direction with puffed-up red eyes through tendrils of snot and tear-damp hair.

“My mother’s cousin was the landlord of some farmland. I went to go and live with them for training and making connections. My mother hoped that I could marry well.” She sniffed loudly and pulled her hand away from Katsumichi’s.

“Do you miss it?” Katsumichi asked. He knew it was a loaded question but he mostly wanted Eri to stop crying. For now, he couldn’t do anything about the fact that she was hurting. It was for mostly selfish reasons that he wanted to erase all traces of her tears. She must have realised this herself as she picked at her nails and steadied her breathing as best she could.

“I was only young. I didn’t do much besides learning how to refine my behaviour enough to properly flirt with rich boys.” She huffed and wiped at her face roughly, very refined, and smiled sardonically at Katsumichi. “There wasn’t that much about it to miss. I receive letters from my mother and I send her as much of my wages as I can. I have this… life to live now.”

“You receive letters?” Katsumichi asked, yet more selfishly. Eri nodded. She was crying because she didn’t want her life to end at the whims of immature princes, yet Katsumichi, a very immature prince, could only focus on the fact that she had been able to send and receive correspondence from home. He really was awful.

“They aren’t all that interesting. Just the same sort of thing about how my mother misses me but is proud of me. I can’t complain because all of my letters are the same way,” Eri said quietly. “It worries me to hear about how the people from the Dead Kingdoms sometimes get so close to my family and take the things they have, but they must worry about me and how bland my reports of serving princes must be.”

“The barbarians trouble you too?” Katsumichi asked. This was something he could relate too without feeling petty and jealous.

Eri laughed drily. “Yes but my family wouldn’t do anything beyond the reasonable. They can only repair fences and walls. They aren’t going to hold a hunt because they want revenge.”

“It was only that one time,” Katsumichi muttered. He could hear the petulance in his voice and he knew that there were more pressing matters. But he still remembered how Taichi had looked at him while telling him that the practices of his kingdom were unethical, that Johzenji were just as bad as the savages. It was the same look that Eri was fixing him with regardless of the difference in their stations.

“What was?”

“The barbarians had no respect for our laws or people. But we don’t make a habit of chasing them down and killing them. It was just that one time, after they killed my mother we went looking for the perpetrator to punish. That’s not wrong, is it?” Katsumichi asked. Eri’s face hadn’t changed much and Katsumichi wondered why she was looking down on him so much. “My mother was a good person and her goodness made her into a victim. So we went in search of the barbarian who did it. But there was an ambush. My stupidity was almost equal to my mother’s goodness and I too was almost killed.”

The fear at the time had been mostly outweighed by resignation. Katsumichi certainly felt resigned these days. He had resigned himself to a political death previously and now, regardless of Taichi’s assurances that it would not come to that, the feeling remained. He hated the weight of acceptance, how he was so willing to allow things to happen.

Katsumichi had only been young when death had first clutched at him, sneered at him, before it had been killed itself. Nothing had changed and even now Katsumichi was relying on other people to save him. Runa had never mentioned the incident since, but a child herself being in the right place at the right time. Katsumichi hadn’t yet been able to return the favour and he was stuck looking to his own death for a solution.  

“How did you almost die? You’re a prince, aren’t you?” Eri asked bluntly. They were still in the palace grounds but cloistered away amongst the lush greenery and the mass of flowers that made even Kastsumichi’s nose twinge, things were slightly different. It was more like Katsumichi’s first day in the kingdom when he wasn’t quite sure of anything, lest why he was even here. He had regretted and been glad that he agreed to come to Shiratorizawa many times since the fact but at this moment, with Eri he wondered whether being a prince was worth anything at all.

Being a prince didn’t disqualify anybody from death. He replied, “My mother was a queen.”

Eri rubbed at her nose and sniffed. “Are you saying Johzenji only once killed a person from a Dead Kingdom?”

“Well, that was the only death from official activities. I can’t guarantee no other barbarians were ever executed. It is exactly the same as with the other kingdoms.”

“Why did anybody have to die at all?” Eri asked with a frown.

“My mother was killed by a barbarian. We went to find that barbarian to punish them but they saw fit to do more.”

“How much more? What could they have done for you to kill them?” Eri pressed. 

Katsumichi opened his mouth but only a sigh came out. He reached out for Eri once more, for the pale of her slender neck above the frayed hem of her _kariginu_. Her eyes only widened a fraction for a second as Katsumichi’s other arm pressed her to the ground by the shoulder. He straddled her waist without any resistance and closed both of his hands around her throat. Not squeezing, just holding. She looked as though she didn’t care even as the nail of his thumb traced the column of her throat.

“I don’t bite my nails, Eri. I’m a bit like the barbarian that way. With enough force I could stab right through your neck and kill you. How would you feel if you knew that I was desperate enough to do that?”

Eri quietly exhaled through her nose. Katsumichi knew what it was like to not want to die all too well.  

“What are you doing over there?” A thin voice called.

Katsumichi leaned up and over the top of a bush bursting with blooms saw Prince Kenjirou, red-faced and panting, glaring back. He scrubbed at his cheeks angrily when his eyes locked with Katsumichi’s and it was clear that Eri was not the only one with reason to cry today.

“Whatever is the matter, Prince Kenjirou?” Katsumichi asked. He decided to forgo the more formal address that might make their meeting more pleasant than the last encounter they had.  

Prince Kenjirou, still breathing heavily, pressed his lips together and his nostrils flared. “What are you doing with that woman.”

Katsumichi glanced down at Eri whose blank face had split into the clandestine sort of grin that was more reminiscent of Yukie. He loosed his hands from her neck and looked back up at Prince Kenjirou. “Before you interrupted, we were indulging in a lovers’ tryst. It is a shame that you had to happen upon our torrid affair so quickly.”

Prince Kenjirou sniffed primly. Katsumichi wondered how much he had really heard about what Katsumichi had been telling Eri. Maybe he hadn’t heard anything at all. He was puffing out his cheeks as though he had sprinted around the grounds of the palace, so Katsumichi would not have been surprised at all if he had spied the scene and called out immediately.  

“I wish it had been you,” Prince Kenjirou muttered.

“What was that?”

“My brother wants to see you. There has been an announcement and he said he needed to see you right away,” Prince Kenjirou said.

Katsumichi felt his stomach swoop and Eri clutched at his _hakama_. There were only a select number of things that an announcement would have been made about today. He clambered up quickly and pulled Eri up from the ground. Prince Kenjirou didn’t explain further so Katsumichi and Eri could only follow him to the main courtyard of the palace.

 

There were crowds of servants and aged ministers murmuring to one another in the courtyard. Court ladies were hiding their faces behind fans and gossiping in much more subtle ways as they continued to glance up the stone steps to the King’s residence. Atop the steps were the queens and concubines lined up with stiff expressions behind the three princes who had met up the day before.

Crown Prince Wakatoshi was grim-faced as he looked on the courtyard. It was Prince Satori who nudged the dour Taichi until he noticed Katsumichi’s arrival. He jolted into action and only paused to respond to something quiet that Crown Prince Wakatoshi had said. It was only a few seconds before Taichi made his way down the steps and wrapped himself around Katsumichi.

“Eri, thank you,” He muttered into Katsumichi’s shoulder. He pulled away and gripped Katsumichi’s face and stroked his thumbs over the hollows of Katsumichi’s cheeks. “We need to go somewhere else. I need to speak with you privately.”

Katsumichi flinched though he could tell that Taichi was affected much more violently by the booming of a voice that silenced the chatter of the courtyard.

“The King is dead. Long live the King.”

Katsumichi couldn’t quite turn his head within Taichi’s grasp but he strained his eyes to see Prince Reon resolutely sinking to his knees at the foot of the stairs. He looked back to Taichi’s face, searching, but the blankness he was so irritated by before had returned.

Lady Mai was at Prince Reon’s side, on her knees to bow to the new king. But all that had happened before Katsumichi’s arrival were whispers. He wasn’t aware of any official announcement that the King had died, that he had declared his successor. All around them, ministers and court ladies and lords and servants and princes lowered themselves to the ground and echoed the first cry.

“The King is dead. Long live the King.”

“Katsumichi,” Taichi whispered urgently.

His eyes returned to the oddly blank face of his spouse but he felt like he wasn’t particularly seeing anything.

“We need to go.”

“I don’t… What is happening?” He asked dumbly. He knew exactly what was happening. He should have known to expect it, but he was standing in a sea of support for the new King. Behind Prince Satori were the queens and concubines, their faces just as blank as Katsumichi had come to expect from Shiratorizawa as they too cheered in the new reign.

“The King is dead. Long love the King.”

“Katsumichi, now!”

“Of course,” Katsumichi eventually nodded. He felt too slow, his head was stuffy. Taichi released him for bare seconds before latching onto his hand once more and marching away from Prince Kenjirou as he stewed with something he probably wasn’t allowed to express. Katsumichi wondered whether he was actually upset, whether he was the only one of the children of Shiratorizawa that Katsumichi had seen shed a tear for their King.

Taichi moved quickly until they reached a place that had strangely become familiar to Katsumichi at Shiratorizawa: the row of bathing rooms he had first been brought to at Shiratorizawa. Taichi burst through one of the doors without a care for whether there was anybody within and slammed the door shut behind them. Once more his arms were around Katsumichi as though he was using his hands to confirm his condition.

Taichi’s face was grim even as his grip of Katsumichi got tighter and tighter. “I love you.”

Katsumichi was glad that Taichi’s strengthening grip pushed his face into Taichi’s shoulder. He opened his mouth but he couldn’t say a thing. He loved Taichi, of course he did. But he was being held by a murderer. The man whose heat he could feel had snatched the last breath from the body of a person.

He wanted to know whether everything had gone as planned. He wanted to know whether Johzenji was secure, whether their family could continue to be, whether the promises he had made to Eri would come true. At the same time as not wanting to feel Taichi’s hands he selfishly wanted to know so much. His chest felt tighter and it had nothing to do with the grip of Taichi’s arms around him.

And then he felt Taichi shudder against him. He all but collapsed onto Katsumichi with the expulsion of air from his chest and Katsumichi would not have been surprised if Taichi’s body had given out from the shock of the day.

“Taichi, are you alright?”

“I did it. I did it for you, Katsumichi,” Taichi muttered rapidly into Katsumichi’s ear.

“I know.” Katsumichi could finally hear his own voice but he sounded pathetically weak. He needed to be strong. He needed to be reassuring. He needed to push all of the negatives out of his mind until Taichi had calmed down and they were both more able to process what had happened. He cleared his throat.

“The Crown Prince… King Wakatoshi promised to leave Johzenji alone. So you don’t have to do anything stupid. So you can stay. Do you understand? I love you, Katsumichi. What I did today, I would do a thousand times more if that is what it takes to keep you with me.”

Katsumichi felt himself pulling back as he peered up into Taichi’s face. His curiosity was getting the better of him. Or perhaps it was just morbid interest that had reared its head after he tried to show Eri how he had almost died the first time. When he opened his mouth it still wasn’t to tell his spouse that he loved him, it was to ask, “Today, what exactly did you do?”

“Poisoned him,” Taichi said flippantly. He seemed to expect the recoil because his body followed Katsumichi’s and he maintained contact. “I wanted him to suffer the way you were willing to. It was all his fault anyway, but it took a long time. He kept vomiting and crawling around. He was begging for help. For the first time he was looking at me without sneering about how inadequate of a child I am. But I soon tired of that. I had to smother him to get it over and done with.”

“Taichi…”

“He’s gone, Katsumichi. King Wakatoshi has promised. I could do the same to him if he refuses,” Taichi said.

Katsumichi frowned. It was as though Taichi couldn’t hear himself. “Taichi, he could just have you killed first.”

“He could,” Taichi agreed. The corners of his mouth rose and made his cheeks bunch mischievously. “My, why am I smiling at a time like this.”

“You had better not be getting any silly ideas,” Katsumichi hissed.

“I could be disposed of at any time,” Taichi mused.

“Then what you did could all have been for nothing but your brother’s greed.”

“No, no!” Taichi said happily shaking his head. “He announced before all of those people, that the King’s dying wish was to abandon plans to annex Johzenji. Most of those people didn’t even know about it, but when King Wakatoshi said it, I could see all the people who had known of it. They have to accept it. Regardless of whether they strongly feel they should go ahead with it, it is King Wakatoshi. Who would defy him?”

“You need to calm down, Taichi,” Katsumichi muttered. He couldn’t smile himself. He was supposed to be happy. This was good news for him. Even if something terrible happened, a promise and a royal decree had been made. But he could see Taichi’s grin and his own facial muscles were frozen.

“I am calm,” Taichi said. His smile softened with the run of Katsumichi’s hands up and down his arms. “Katsumichi, I love you so much, do you understand?”

“I know, I know,” Katsumichi mumbled. The words tasted like ash in his mouth but the longer the pair of them were cloistered away in this tiny, dim room, the more apparent it became that Taichi would continue smiling and acting as though everything was fine. It was not fine. He was a danger. Katsumichi knew that well enough. He pressed his lips, carefully, gently, to Taichi’s jaw before staring back up at him. “I love you, Taichi. Thank you for what you have done for me, but… It isn’t over.”

“Yes, it is,” Taichi snapped. His smile hardened for the first time as he frowned down at Katsumichi. “The coronation will take place in a matter of days. The announcements will be made by the end of the day. It is over. I did it for you, Katsumichi.”

It didn’t feel good to know that Taichi was so highly strung because of what he had done for Katsumichi. He couldn’t even feel glad of the tentative promise that had been made by the now King Wakatoshi.  

He shook his head and watched Taichi’s frown deepen.

“When we get home, we can live how you wanted all along,” He muttered, linking his fingers tightly enough with Taichi’s that he was beginning to lose feeling. “We can live quietly on the estate together and stay away from politics of every form. And I will do everything I can to ensure your protection. We can hire more guards to so that nobody can reach you and harm you for what you have done.”

“This sounds too good to be true.”

Katsumichi could not help but agree. “I have been thinking very nasty things about you today. But the things you did and what you have become is all my fault. I did this to you,” He said quietly. Taichi was already so close but he needed to be closer and Katsumichi pressed his face against Taichi’s neck and shivered at the odd cool of his skin. “Today has been too good to be true for me. It could all come crashing down around us, Taichi. I need to stop that. I need to keep you with me.”

Despite the cold touch of Taichi’s skin, the contact was a comfort. The buzzing of Taichi’s voice moving up his neck made Katsumichi’s teeth tingle and he wanted to be even closer to the person he had almost completely broken.

“I’m not going anywhere,” Taichi said.

“I know that much. I’m just worried that someone might take you away from me.”

He certainly had reason to worry. It sounded too easy for Taichi to have killed the King. If the head of a state could so easily be assassinated, a person without much standing should surely be far more simple to do away with. There were no guarantees for Taichi’s life, just as there were no guarantees for Johzenji’s security. Between them, the debt Katsumichi and Taichi had accumulated to King Wakatoshi was something Katsumichi would struggle to know how to repay.  

He had to do whatever he could. Today had been for his sake so the least he could do was try to protect his spouse and hope any calls to repay his debts would be insignificant.

 

 

The weather had cooled down some recently, but unlike the day the previous king of Shiratorizawa died, the rain was heavy, plummeting from the dark clouds in warm globs that seeped into Katsumichi’s hair and soaked even his scalp beneath the _kanmuri_ on his head. The small black cap had a bump at the back where Yukie had painstakingly tied a knot of his hair to hide neatly, though with the rain it seemed that all of her work would be undone so easily. Katsumichi glanced up at Taichi and saw how the tails extruding from the back of the _kanmuri_ were wilting under their own saturated weight, and there was no doubt that he looked just as poorly presented. It was a shame that so many people were dressed up in _sokutai_ just for their clothing to become sodden with the rain.

The round-necked _hou_ coat that Katsumichi wore over his _hanpi_ – and the stiff layers beneath – was almost choking with the weight of the fat droplets of rain and Katsumichi had to fight to keep his hands by his side. He turned his head slightly, hoping that the rain would prevent the _ei_ tails from wagging around too much with his nosey movements. Runa was standing two rows ahead of Katsumichi. She was standing tall beside Prince Tsutomu with her back straight and strong. Katsumichi wasn’t sure whether it was sheer force of will keeping her so upright or if she’d had Kaori somehow stitch the many _kariginu_ to stiffen the silks and form an exoskeleton that had glimmered that morning and squelched darkly by the time the audience needed to assemble themselves for the coronation.

All of the women, the mothers of the princes stood beside their sons and the others standing beside their wives, wore blank expressions as they looked up to the platform where the aged officials stood. Lady Mai was standing on the very front row, further along the line than Runa and Prince Tsutomu. She was looking straight ahead without tilting her chin up to the rain splashing on her cheeks from what Katsumichi could tell. The angle of her neck became more pronounced when Prince Reon muttered something down to her and she looked towards the platform for just a moment before returning her gaze to the middle-distance.

“You seem unsettled,” Taichi murmured.

Katsumichi blinked at the rain on his lashes and looked up at Taichi with a tight-lipped smile.

“I’m fine,” He said quietly. “Only, it isn’t every day that you see a new king being crowned.”

Taichi glanced around, though it was not as though he could easily identify people listening specifically to them. The royals were obviously going to be able to maintain careful masks no matter what they happened to hear. Taichi sighed without saying anything but even as he moved away, Katsumichi felt the cold stripe of Taichi’s sleeve against the back of his hand. He moved his hand slightly and curled his fingers around Taichi’s proffered hand.

There wasn’t much more that Katsumichi could say, not when surrounded so entirely. He settled for watching as the fires on the platform were lit, orange flames licking at the raindrops, teasing and unperturbed.

Citizens from Shiratorizawa had been allowed within the palace grounds to witness the coronation. It was just a select few who had been vetted thoroughly as though there was a chance that any of them might make an attempt on King Wakatoshi – he was popular enough that complacency could have been forgiven. Outside the palace, the streets were filled with droves of people who had no doubt already begun celebrations in spite of the rain that created sludge around their feet.

Katsumichi had wanted to see what a festival looked like in a different kingdom, but Taichi had already requested that they return home immediately following the coronation. Katsumichi understood well enough. It would be better if Taichi didn’t have to dwell on the things that had happened in the main palace. At home it was quiet and calm and Taichi could shirk his duties as much as he wanted to.

Runa would be returning to West River with them, but when they were back there, away from the chaos of the palace, it would be mere days before Runa left again. Taichi had informed Katsumichi that Prince Tsutomu’s family were the nearest in the kingdom to West River, but that didn’t particularly mean that they would see one another regularly. Katsumichi peered at the back of Runa’s head where the rain had plastered her hair to the shape of her skull before drooping in drenched clumps down her back. But there was not even the tiniest ripple of cold through her body. It was completely different to Taichi who was shivering violently at Katsumichi’s side.

Lady Yue was staring at Taichi with open displeasure, but not much had been pleasing to her eye since the old king had died. She noticed Katsumichi looking back at her with a jolt and returned her dour gaze to King Wakatoshi on the platform.

Katsumichi hoped the aged officials with wavering voices wouldn’t go on for too much longer. It was hard enough having to squint through the fat droplets of rapidly cooling rain. Despite it all, King Wakatoshi looked as though he was smiling. It was difficult to tell, even as Katsumichi rubbed the droplets from his eyelashes and strained his eyes just to make sure. He pressed closer to Taichi to ask, “Does he look like he is smiling?”

“Of course he is.”

“But, considering how he got to stand up there, shouldn’t he be at least a little bit sad?”

Taichi looked down at Katsumichi with a stiff smile. He was a fool for even now trying to hide how the rigidness of his body was worsening the shudders even as he tilted his neck down so his mouth was at Katsumichi’s ear. “Do you not think that your brother smiled as he quietly became king?”

Of course, Yuuji might have been smiling as he accepted the responsibilities that nobody had attributed to him beforehand. But Katsumichi wasn’t sure that his brother would have smiled. He hadn’t been himself for the years of illness that had him ruling by proxy while the citizens knew nothing of the malady of their King.

King Yuuji’s ascent to the throne was something merciful, no matter how many bad feelings Katsumichi had about it. Finally their father’s spirit could rest and the kingdom could mourn something that had long-since passed. King Wakatoshi’s ascent was due to the selfishness of many people. Katsumichi didn’t feel happy about the fact that his own uselessness had contributed.   

King Wakatoshi stood at the head of his kingdom.

Katsumichi could be selfish for a bit longer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It has taken me around six months to plan this out and get it all written. It was really fun! It was a labour of love and even though this is the last chapter I do not believe that this is the last time I will visit this 'verse. There are possibilities of delving into the other kingdoms mentioned and seeing what happens when the war inevitably greets the region. 
> 
> It was hard work because I have never planned and researched something so thoroughly before now but it was an exercise that will help me improve in the future. 
> 
> I didn't bother with notes until now (rather, I deleted the notes made on the first three chapters and neglected to include any from then on) because nobody was reading it. I find that notes are a nice way of seeing how the author thinks of their writing and can communicate with any readers, and to be honest I find it off-putting to read a fic without any notes myself, but I did not have any readers at the time of posting so they seemed redundant. I will now say that if you did read to the end, thank you for persevering, and sorry for being absent. 
> 
> For my final thoughts I will reveal that chapter 14 was my favourite to write (and I found I could not help but nod towards other fics I had written in a fit of self-indulgent glee), and that this work was inspired by the Korean drama Moon Lovers: Scarlet Heart Ryeo. Perhaps one day I will take a gander at the Chinese original, though it might take some prodding. 
> 
> Thanks for reading.


End file.
